Kaeyapologist

HE'S SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL

OH MY PRETTY BBY I MISSED YOU SO MUCH

minor spoilers below

but in the meantime

kindly consider a situation where a rapidly rising crime syndicate decided to try their hands into infiltrating the mondstadt underground. on the surface, their knights and people seem to mostly be honorable and pacifist, and the illegal activity seems vanilla. they dont understand why other groups haven't done anything in the city just yet.

unfortunately for them, both diluc's and kaeya's respective intel networks caught wind of said plans.

diluc is immediately on high alert, while kaeya reports to varka asap.

varka, having known of this group from the curatorium, is immediately concerned. this particular group is known for awfully brutal crimes that had even seasoned adventurers fearing to venture alone. varka considers his next move. who does he assign to this issue?

kaeya flips a coin, catching varka's attention. the cavalry captain smirks at the grandmaster before casually saying " i heard that vice captain lohen has returned from his espionage mission."

varka raises an eyebrow at kaeya, knowing full well what he was trying to imply. it's not the first time kaeya and lohen have suggested it, but rarely does a mission require both of them.

"let us work together."

"I'd love to learn more from him."

"we'd make a wonderful team."

the thought of lohen and kaeya working together... it really brings the cold sweat out of him! but with no one else free to take this mission, and considering the success rate of these two when it comes to these missions...

still, isnt this a bit overboard?!

"... alright, I'll leave this to you two..." varka finally mutters with a sigh, still unsure if this was the right decision.

" perfect! then, if that is all, I'll head off to tell my partner of our new mission, grandmaster." kaeya cheerfully says, turning around quickly.

" ... wait!" varka exclaims, making kaeya pause in his step. he glances back at his grandmaster, waiting for the elder to speak up.

the grandmaster furrows his brows in worry, pondering what to say for a moment, before simply saying " don't overdo it."

kaeya smiles widely at that, and it doesn't really make varka feel any better with his decision. in fact, it makes him feel worse!

"don't worry, grandmaster varka" kaeya softly says, his visible eye glinting in mischief. varka worries even harder.

thanks to nicole, we find out that angels that chose power over wisdom would turn into corrupted dragons

so

- some angels turning into dragons

- kaeya having similar design details to nicole

- *reaching* me theorizing the alberichs are nibelung descendants or has draconic blood

Anon who got a phone

hello! congrats on getting your teapot! have fun building spaces ^^ hopefully it's now easier for people to level up in the teapot compared to how it was back then 😅

also, yeah, childe looks absolutely fine

Flipping a coin → improv stress toy ✓

I bet if he had one of those stress balls, he'd break it in a week tops. I got one once and it lasted me a little less than a month and I don't have abandonment issues and a beef with fate.

coin flipping as a fidget toy for kaeya 🙏🙏🙏

anon ur so right.

i think i mentioned or implied this before, but kaeya seems to have anxiety that he masks with efficiency and misdirection 🤔 that has to be exhausting

Right?

sumeru aq+wq+sq lovers, you're gonna love this! i personally spent 9 hours (yes during work hours coz i have the audacity) doing the entire quest because i checked every nook and cranny, talked to everyone, and read everything

- purposely buys ugly stuff to gift to diluc

- tells kids scary stories and legends

- probably cut the landscaping in a funny way at least once based on amber's reaction

- does forgeries (really well) (i hope people pay him for those forgeries but i bet he does it for fun)

- told klee to not get caught doing crimes and breaks her out

- gives prune revenge ideas (the long time alice vs. kaeya beef grows stronger and funnier)

i was about to share the screenshot for the end quest, but the background is a spoiler for where the quest ends

so have this mention of kaeya from prune's character story 1 instead because i am a kaeya account that screams when kaeya's name appears

for those who havent started it yet and want the best context, i highly suggest doing the sumeru world quests and the cyno sq 2 + nahida sq 2 (along with the AQs from sumeru till nod krai)

also its really funny to me how genshin added an info book for the involved characters and other lore important mentions instead of a skip button 😅 the guide book is very helpful to me!

Crepus about Kaeya: this is my fake kid. Both his parents are alive, but his home country is a little dangerous for him right now, so he's going to live under my care until things calm down. Which is not that different from temporary fostering a kid. Which means I'm his forster parent.mWhich means he's as good as mine. He looks a little like a bird. Isn't he adorable?

Crepus about Childe: this is my youngest's (Kaeya) bodyguard. He seems a little after him when no one else can. Does a great job at protecting Kaeya, makes him happy, is polite and even can cook. Adeline and I are already looking wedding gifts.

Varka: I only asked why there's a prince on your couch.

The idea came from that scene where the other girl is trying to teach her to eat a hamburger, except it was Jean and Diluc with Kaeya as the one who doesn't know how to eat to pass as a normal person. Because even modern rich kids would be better at passing as normal than royalty.

i bet diluc argued that he couldve been kaeya's bodyguard as his older brother too 😂

also, varka cant talk, he's also the type to overexplain when talking about his own kids!

I think it was this blog I send that to? In case it was not, still funny coincidence.

IT WAS MEEEE

OMG THAT WAS YOU? HELLO AGAIN! I LOVED THAT ASK

tbh the reason why i didnt post the kaeya tower thing is because im figuring out who would be the group of 4 people that would save him 😅 but the 2 people i was sure i wanted in the party were diluc and the traveler