so since I left college I've been working for the man. haven't been doing enough art in 2019. entered exhibitions last October and tried selling work in Castlebar, in a store, nobody interested. applied for exhibitions this year. sometimes I feel like giving up, what's the point. work I don't so much enjoy. I have to create, at my most existentially anxious I begin to draw the female form, start somewhere. I prefer the female form than male, I know the male form has its purpose but the female form is more perfectly precise mathematically or Fibonacci sequential. somebody created it and I'm recreating what's already been created. it's not just sexual about her form, maybe it's the anima. things begin to make sense and I feel like I understand and have a purose, where I was born.. beauty and form, composition, visually capable. it doesn't matter a lot about the material I will use but moreso it's composition so that's a proposal I can't walk away from. something bigs gonna be
