ˋ°•*⁀➷ [heaven help me!] ○.˚ @justiceforplutoo - Tumblr Blog

{ pluto ☆ they/she/he ☆ 16 - minor! }

i've been in the stranger things fandom since '22! i'm a long-time steddie shipper (read: diehard) (you don't understand. i'm insane about them.) and a big lover of ronance, buckingham, el(u)max, henderhop, byler, and so many rarepairs that it's not even funny.

recently, i laid my monofandom years to rest and got into the dc fandom (batfam...batboys...okay, jason todd.) (what can i say? i am predictable) and this year i've been on a tma and heated rivalry kick!

[ update: my best friend has gotten me into hannibal and i'm a total freak about it. ]

in the words of kristen stewart, I'm like so gay (sapphic aegorose here, how d'you do?)...mostly for @petrifiedlark, my qpr/zucchini and partner in crime. (and maya hawke) (and my harem) (we don't talk about the harem.)

I am always open to meeting new moots and interacting with new people! drop in my inbox! come say hi!

{ my ao3 || my pinterest || my letterboxd }

browser & scrollbar dividers by @honeyluvsw

gifs, blinkies, + pngs under the cut!

#pinned post #intro post #plutoo yaps

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himbomarleau

Thinking about a scenario where Marleau goes to all stars instead of Ilya because Ilya is injured and he ends up hanging out with Shane all weekend and they actually hit it off? Shane is nervous because he knows Marly is Ilya's bro and he doesn't want to embarrass himself in front of him. Marleau is sticking with Shane because he's a bit in awe of playing on the same team as The Shane Hollander. Eventually Shane starts letting out his bitchy one liners under his breath and Marleau is eating it up. By the end of the weekend they are a chirping machine. Marleau is teeing Shane up and Shane is landing the most devastating insults.

Marleau comes back to Boston and is like man Roz you would love Hollander if you could get past the rivalry and Ilya is just staring wide eyed at him. Marly is going off about how funny Shane is and talking up his hockey iq. Ilya is just like ha ha. Yes. If only I didn't hate his guts... meanwhile he's furiously texting "Jane" "Marleau is my friend. You can't have him"

#cliff marleau #oh cliff

normal-about-hollanov

married shane does NOT play about ilya when it comes to the press. he's letting out a decade of pent up 'wheres the fucking translator? what do you fucking MEAN you don't have one?', instant 'rephrase that' to the offending journalist when ilya hesitates over a question, gets into full blown forget-the-media-training arguments when it's implied that ilya is somehow stupid for not speaking perfect english, n switches between russian, french, and english to make interviews as easy as possible for ilya. and of course ilya is fully capable of speaking english. he has been since he was a teenager. but it also won't stop him from giving shane the biggest wettest lover boy eyes n raw dogging him crazy style the moment its over.

#excuse me he asked for those pickles IN RUSSIAN #hollanov

howldean

“june is over so now it’s gay wrath month” blah blah reminder that july is disability pride month and is often ignored and disregarded!! funnel that wrath into advocating for your disabled peers and amplifying their voices

bugbraiin

One thing im uncomfortably woke about is bugs. And im actively trying to get more uncomfortably woke. By this i mean i DO believe the normalised fear of bugs stems from both government and business propaganda. The start of household pesticide sales coinciding with the boom in insect related horror movies. The promotion of anti intellectualism and anti enviromentalism. If you're scared of bugs, you wont care about saving them. If you dont care about saving them, you wont care about saving our home, since without bugs it cannot be saved. If you dont care about saving our home, the rich can do whatever they want with the chunks of it they continue to destroy.

I WILL calmly and kindly try to help anyone who is afraid of bugs. I will show them my finds, i will explain their importance, i will tell them just how sweet and gentle and friendly they are. And I WILL shoot down any immature loser who believes senseless killing is the only possible response to not liking something.

Get woke. Love bugs.

EDIT: this breached containment. My usual like count is like 5 😭 i want to clarify i mean people who conflate fear with hate are the ones who wont care about saving our planet, like people who threaten to kill peoples pet bugs or actively kill bugs outside for no apparent reason. Not people who run away from a bee.

scenerwiththegreenery

fear of bugs is something you can overcome, and i highly recommend you work on that. but op covered that pretty well so i want to talk about the psychology here.

humans are susceptible to the disgust -> fear -> hate pipeline and this affects everything. we see it in every "anti". it fuels anti-environmentalism, as OP has said, but also a lot of bigotry works the same way (and that also benefits the same people tbh).

look at the people who are frequently targeted by hate. what is the method? those who want you to hate a group of people will capitalize on fear and disgust. we see this with transphobia, with racism, you can look at any type of bigotry and see this exact pattern over and over.

disgust is not a good reason for fear or hate. unlearn that kneejerk reaction to disgust. learn to be uncomfortable and to understand that your personal disgust does not mean a life is less valuable.

#oh shit man #okay #gotta reevaluate myself

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bugbraiin

One thing im uncomfortably woke about is bugs. And im actively trying to get more uncomfortably woke. By this i mean i DO believe the normalised fear of bugs stems from both government and business propaganda. The start of household pesticide sales coinciding with the boom in insect related horror movies. The promotion of anti intellectualism and anti enviromentalism. If you're scared of bugs, you wont care about saving them. If you dont care about saving them, you wont care about saving our home, since without bugs it cannot be saved. If you dont care about saving our home, the rich can do whatever they want with the chunks of it they continue to destroy.

I WILL calmly and kindly try to help anyone who is afraid of bugs. I will show them my finds, i will explain their importance, i will tell them just how sweet and gentle and friendly they are. And I WILL shoot down any immature loser who believes senseless killing is the only possible response to not liking something.

Get woke. Love bugs.

EDIT: this breached containment. My usual like count is like 5 😭 i want to clarify i mean people who conflate fear with hate are the ones who wont care about saving our planet, like people who threaten to kill peoples pet bugs or actively kill bugs outside for no apparent reason. Not people who run away from a bee.

justiceforplutoo

@petrifiedlark relieved about that edit (<- i have/will/will again ran/run from a bee) but i think i need to get uncomfortably woke about bugs now.

#important

papayafromtv

during an argument with Ra's about whether or not the Al Ghul family could even be considered legal royalty, Jason convinces him to spend a ridiculous amount of time and resources declaring Nanda Parbat and by consequence the League of Assassins to be a part of their own independent nation/country, of which the Al Ghuls are the royal family. an unintended consequence of this is that they are then somehow invited to participate in the Olympic games, whereupon Jason thinks it would be funny to compete in the precision shooting division. it becomes rapidly less funny when he runs into Dick Grayson in the Olympic Village, because Dick lost a bet and had to compete in America's gymnastics division for that year.

a leaked series of press shots shows a photo of the two recreating the spiderman pointing meme in the middle of the street and then a photo of Jason booking it while Dick gives chase, and the footage of Jason winning the gold will forever be immortalised in Gotham meme culture simply because Dick is seen in the background of the entire livestream, standing in the front of the viewing area with his arms crossed and fucking glaring into the side of Jason's skull without blinking or looking away for a second.

Ra's has to give a statement about how he agreed to house Bruce Wayne's second ward as part of a witness protection program, and when he comes back from the press conference he solemnly declares to Jason that 'being royalty wasn't fucking worth it.'

#jason todd #dick grayson #this is so funny

parkchanwoohoo

Sucks that “sleeping together” refers to sex. Sometimes a fella just wants to snooze with a pal.

nyaskitten

Reblog if you wanna snooze with a pal

bruce-wayne-enjoyer

HC based on me and my siblings: Jason being so quick at wordplay, or like just belting songs out at random. Mixed emotions from his family follow.

---------

Batman, mid-briefing: Your team needs to get to the bottom of this.

Red Hood: Oh yeah, I have a lot of experience being a bottom

Batman: Excuse me?

Red Hood:

Red Hood, raising his voice: I SAID I HAVE A LOT OF EXPERIENCE BEING A BOTTOM-

---------

Random JL member: You need to stop trusting Batman.

Nightwing: Batman? You mean our father?

Red Hood: Who art in heaven?

Random JL member: ????

Nightwing, trying not to smile: ...Hood... Not right now...

Red Hood: HALLOW BE THY NAME??

---------

[Duke and Jason lounging in the living room when Damian comes in carrying Alfred the Cat, panicked]

Duke: What's wrong, lil buddy?

Damian, distraught: I accidentally tripped on Alfred's tail!!

Jason: Tail?

Duke: Oh no.

Jason, starts singing: Tail as old as time~ 🎶

Alfred TC and Damian: [start tearing up]

Jason: Right. Sorry. Vet, now.

---------

Cass: Oh say, can you—

Jason, starts singing: SEEEEEEE

Cass:

Jason: BY THE DAWN'S EARLY LIGHT

Cass: [chucks a batarang at him]

Jason, as he catches it: WHAT SO PROUUUUDDDLYYY WE HAIIIIILEDDDD-

---------

Red Hood: [points to a jar] That's so me.

Red Robin: ??

Red Hood: Get it? The jar is a mason jar? I'm a-

Red Robin: Jason, there's a dead body next to that jar. If you don't want to join it, I suggest shutting up.

---------

Jason, passing out take-out coffee to Barbara: Do you know why they say too much coffee is bad for you?

Jason: Because you'll start caffiene

Barbara:

Jason: Get it? Caffiene. Coughing?

Barbara:

Barbara: Jason, here's ten dollars. I will pay you to say that to Stephanie next.

#jason todd #batfam

libraford

Googled something about quick hydration and it suggested big jug of water, couple tbsp pickle juice, dash of lime juice.

Its surprisingly tasty????

libraford

Pleased to report that after a day of this i am not longer craving caper brine and my mouth is not dry as usual. There's some good suggestions in the notes too that I want to try.

-ancient roman posca: water, red or white wine vinegar, honey, salt, herbs (coriander, mint, thyme)

-switchel: water, ginger, vinegar, sweetener, lemon, salt

-ayran: yogurt, water, salt, mint

-Agua pepino: water, cucumbers, lime, sugar, optional mint.

libraford

I have been reminded of:

-shrub: vinegar, sida water, elderberry (or other berry), sugar.

libraford

I have now been informed of

-sekanjabin: honey, vinegar, mint, water.

libraford

"Wow, I wonder why this post was popular this week."

-sees the reports of the heatwave in Europe-

"... ah."

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papayafromtv

do you guys think Jason takes advantage of the fact that he has so many underage vigilante siblings by telling them to secret shopper his goons and check that they adhere to the 'no selling to kids' rule? because i do and i think each child fucks up the job in their own spectacular way.

Nightwing, landing on a rooftop where Red Hood's speaking to one of his subordinates: yo, Hood, what's going on?

Jason: hey. just getting the report for that secret shopper thing i was gonna do with the Wayne kids.

Subordinate: yeah... uh, why are Bruce Wayne's kids taking part in this again?

Jason, without missing a beat: because non of their neighbours need their laws mowed and Brucie says it's important for kids their ages to start learning the responsibility of having a job. anyway, Damian was up tonight, right? who was he buying from, 'cause i already know they failed.

Subordinate: yeah, Rick let the kid buy from him, so he needs to be punished i guess. bought two eighths of weed and an ounce of coke without Rick even blinking.

Jason, frowning: yeah, call that guy up for me to 'speak' to-

Jason:

Jason: wait Damian bought what?

Subordinate: ...two eighths of weed and an ounce of coke?

Jason:

Dick: what's wrong?

Jason, shooting off a grapple: that little shit only gave me back the weed-

~

Jason: *crying with laughter in the middle of the street*

Dick, landing nearby: ...you ok Hood?

Jason: *wheezing*

Duke, faintly, from Jason's phone: ITS NOT FUNNY.

Dick: what's happened?

Jason: Duke- *wheeze* Duke was supposed to do his secret shopper assignment tonight, but he didn't read the memo properly and tried to buy from a group of four of my guys as Signal instead of himself,

Duke: -SHUT UP JASON.

Jason: *still struggling to breathe* so he- so he rocked up and asked to buy as Signal, and my guys all assumed he was arresting them for possession,

Dick: oh my god.

Jason: they dropped him everything they fucking had and bolted, and now he's panicking on the other end of Crime Alley because four peoples' entire product inventory is too much for him to carry in one go and he's scared of leaving any behind for kids to wander across, so he's- *collapses into more laughter*

Dick, in awe: he's just stuck guarding it?!

Duke, from Jason's phone, incredibly distressed: THE RATS ARE CIRCLING IN. I'M NOT USUALLY OUT THIS LATE. SOMEBODY NEEDS TO COME AND FUCKING HELP ME-

Jason: *loses it*

~

Dick: hey, Tim did his secret shopper thing tonight, right? how'd that go?

Jason: *head in his hands*

Dick: ...did the guy fail?

Jason, muffled: no.

Dick: then what happened?

Jason: i had him try to buy from the same guy as Damian, to see if he'd 'learned his lesson', and he refused to sell to Tim point blank.

Dick: ok...?

Jason: but then Tim got offended that he'd sold to Damian and not him, so he pulled a gun on the guy and robbed him instead.

Dick:

Dick: the fuck did he get a gun from-

Jason: i don't fucking know Dick.

~

*Dick and Jason getting food on patrol when Steph calls Jason*

Steph: so i did the thing and it didn't work but i don't think it didn't work because i'm a kid.

Jason: ...what do you mean?

Steph: well i walk up to these two guys and ask to buy, right? and they say sure, what do you want? and i go 'four', and these guys say 'four what' and i'm like ??? the fuck do you think? four drugs. and-

Jason: *puts his head in his hands as Dick chokes on his hotdog*

Steph: -they look at me like i'm the fucking idiot, like, you should know how to count if you're gonna be a drug dealer, it's not like you guys have cash registers to help you out, right? and they start arguing with me and telling me that clearly i'm already high—which, fuck you guys, my makeup is awesome tonight, i do not look like i did it while high, how dare you! so i said maybe they're high and i should call their boss and snitch for stealing his supply, and they were like 'nuh uh blondie, nuh uh!' all mocking and shit, so i kicked one guy in the balls and the other guy grabbed me and now they won't let me leave until i prove that you sent me.

Jason:

Dick: *crying*

Steph, brightly: so yeah, if you could come pick me up~

Jason: i hate all of you.

#batfam #HAHAHAJDLFAJF???

robs-your-robins

Jason has tried to get rid of his white streak so many times. He hates it, he thinks he looks like a character out of one of Damian's manga books but eventually it grows on him but the thing he loves best about it? Answering the questions of people who ask why his hair is like that.

"Stress," he tells a gala attendee, "Yeah, watching my dad at one of these things, making sure he doesn't drown in the punch bowl or french kiss a reporter, it's a stressful job."

"I drank Zesti Cola and Mentos at the same time."

"I disrespected my elders and a ghost straight up bitch slapped me." he tells one of Dick's kids when he's babysitting.

"This is what happens when you wash your hair in Gotham without using treated water."

“I let Dick talk me into a ‘fun brother bonding spa day.’ Something in that hair mask that Donna cooked up was radioactive. I swear.”

“I got caught in a flashbang at close range. My hair saw the light before I did.”

“I got hit with a fear toxin variant. Apparently my hair panicked too.”

"My hair is what now?"

#jason todd

carnicer01

Dumb sketch for today (This is just a joke, please don't take this too seriously, I just wanted to make a joke on their sibling dynamic)

#LMAOO #cass cain #black bat #batgirl #red hood

sourkreem

tim sybau before jason turns you into a borger

#mmm burgersss #red hood #red robin

bingusmyboy

Brothers going to the gym

#i believe #dick grayson #jason todd

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