somebody

And so you started inviting him to things, hoping that he would come like Gatsby waiting for his Daisy. Like Charli XCX throwing a “party 4 u.” Of course, you wouldn’t just invite him, but the rest of the team. The most important thing was your biannual cocktail party, usually modeled after a fun theme. This time, it was a Christmas-themed cocktail party, and you invited your usual friends and, of course, Jimin, Namjoon, and his girlfriend, Nana.

“Hold on, let me put it in the calendar,” Jungkook flipped open his blue Hobonichi notebook to the following week, carefully marking off some time and labeling it with another color, pink with the note, “____’s cocktail party.” 

You were elated, giddy at the thought of Jungkook appearing at something that you were quite passionate about. Over the past two years, you held these every six months, and more and more people became interested in wanting to attend your infamous parties. However, space is limited, and you made it a priority for Jungkook to appear over some folks on the waitlist. They would understand, though; you were trying to date the fuck out of the guy.

Of course, Jimin had to be a part of it. He didn’t know you had a crush on Jungkook yet, but you were confident that he had suspicions.

“So, what was Namjoon and Nana’s excuse again?” Jimin questioned again as you two stood in front of your cubicles. He had a coffee cup in his hand, sipping it gently while blowing on it to cool it down. 

“He said Nana had a campaign meeting or something,” you shrugged, setting your fidget toy down. “I feel like Namjoon didn’t wanna go in the first place.”

“He probably didn’t,” Jimin laughed, putting his hand on his hip. “I mean, I get it. He always wanted to get more involved politically, and now he can with his new girl.” 

It was true. Namjoon had an interest in politics at a young age, and at some point, he wanted to be President. Whether or not it would happen is up to God, but you could see it very clearly. 

And so, you planned for just Jungkook and Jimin from work and a few others, and Jackson Wang, your favorite co-host/DJ friend, was excited to hear developments. He had been hearing you talk about Jungkook for weeks now, and couldn’t contain his joy at his attendance. 

“You’re so messy!” Jackson exclaimed, clapping his hands together and laughing all giddily. “You want something to happen tonight, huh?” his eyebrow lifted in curiosity while he plugged his controller into your speakers. 

“No!” you flushed, stacking the cups up at the bar Jimin will be serving from. “I just…I want him to come get to know me, that’s all.”

“Through alcohol,” he emphasized, sticking his tongue out in defiance. “And you’re a hot mess when you’re drunk.”

You frowned.

“Thanks, Jacks.” 

He turned around and did finger guns at you.

“I got you, ____.” 

Jimin came a few minutes later with a bunch of liquor. As you introduced him to Jackson, he squinted his eyes as he saw you in the corner, all nervous. You had a perfect setup with enough chairs and ambient lighting (“Big lights scare me,” you admitted). You had your favorite artwork up, the bathroom with a lit candle, and your favorite stuff out to create a wonderful and inviting vibe. 

But something didn’t feel entirely right, and so you proceeded to cleanse the place with a copal resin incense, only to see green coming from the tip. 

“Fuck,” you muttered, setting the incense down in its dish. Jackson, who had gotten used to your witchiness, came over to stare at the incense too. 

“Who the fuck is sending us bad energy?” he inquired, crossing his arms. 

“You know who,” you rolled your eyes, sighing. “She texted me the other day saying that I sabotaged her whole Christmas party.”

“Ugh,” Jackson rolled his eyes dramatically. “I swear, she’ll never move on.”

“Who are you guys talking about?” Jimin inquired, folding the sofa blankets back into their basket. 

“This girl who stopped being friends with me because she was jealous that I moved to Korea,” you sighed, extinguishing the incense. “She’s not even worth my time talking about.” 

“She isn’t,” Jackson emphasized before giving a shot of soju to you and Jimin. Both of you accepted happily, now grinning from ear to ear. He toasted, “Onto better things.” 

“Amen!” you exclaimed, toasting with the both of them. The door rang, and your heart skipped a beat, knowing it was The Man of the Hour.

“I’ll get it,” Jimin smirked, walking towards the door to peep at the peephole. “Ah, it’s Jungkookie.” 

Oh fuck, it is him. 

You started to panic, straightening your dress as Jimin opened your front door with a big, grand embrace from Jungkook, as greetings were aplenty. Jackson stood behind you, crossing his arms in attempts to look tough, only to smile wildly as you approached Jungkook with a hug as well. 

Jungkook looked amazing as usual, wearing his Calvin Klein bomber jacket with his Harley-Davidson helmet on his side. He set the helmet down next to his combat boots before stepping into your space with black socks, his shoulders up as he grinned from ear to ear, excited. You embraced him immediately, guiding him into your humble, decorated apartment. 

“Uh, welcome to my Christmas cocktail party!” you said awkwardly, doing jazz hands as Jungkook laughed, looking around. 

“It’s super cute,” he complimented. “And here…” he had a wine gift bag with him. “Thought I’d contribute to the party with some booze. I know you don’t really drink Japanese whiskey, but—” 

“Don’t mind if I do!” Jackson interrupted, grabbing the wine bag from him immediately. “I’m Jackson, by the way,” he extended his hand out as a hello. You cleared your throat, glaring at him. 

“Sorry, Jacks can be a little too much sometimes,” you laughed awkwardly, eyes darting at him like a set of daggers. 

Jackson frowned jokingly before opening the bag, revealing its contents. “Ah, Hibiki. Nice choice, dude.” 

“Thanks…uh, dude,” Jungkook grinned, taking off his jacket. Underneath, he wore a green sweatshirt, perfectly hugging his body. “Do you guys have an exclusive coat service?” he laughed. 

And so, after another thirty minutes, your home was filled with your usual cocktail party friends, and it became extremely lively. You and Jackson were being perfect hosts, making sure everyone was comfortable and having a good time. Jimin was doing the gay bar special, putting lots of alcohol in his cocktails with a spritz of juice or sparkling water (“It’s more fun when people are drunk!” Jimin exclaimed). Jackson did an amazing DJ set, getting people to chatter it up and keeping each other entertained. 

You could see a few couples getting a bit chummier with each other, which has been your cocktail party’s reputation: a good place to meet new people casually and without any bad intentions. Jackson, of course, nudged you as you could see Jungkook sitting in the corner with a drink, eyes closed and jamming to some Nujabes.

“Go get him, tiger,” he whispered as he grabbed your drink away from your hands, pushing you toward him. 

Ding.

You checked your phone and saw your mom was calling. You frowned, showing the screen to your co-host.

“That’s strange, it’s late as hell over there in LA.” 

“Yeah…” Your eyes furrowed, gesturing for Jackson to turn down the music. The crowd was taken aback, but then all noticed that your expression changed the moment you picked up the phone. Your jaw dropped at the news, nearly dropping your phone on the ground. 

“____? You okay?” Jackson stood up immediately, seeing you sitting down on the nearest bench in disbelief. You heaved heavily, tears beginning to fall. 

“My grandma is gone.” 

“Holy shit,” Jimin exclaimed, walking briskly to your side to console you, but you stood up right away, walking towards your bedroom. 

“____, wait.” 

“I need a minute,” you breathed, eyes losing focus. You couldn’t believe it. You just saw your grandma earlier this year over the summer. She had been sick for the past several days, but you swore you heard from your aunt that she was about to get discharged earlier in the day.

You closed the door behind you softly before collapsing on the floor, sobbing, clutching your chest. You stayed that way for a bit until you heard a soft knock on the door. 

“Hey, it’s me,” Jungkook’s muffled voice came through. You opened your eyes, wiping your tears and nose before standing up suddenly, feeling a bit faint. You held yourself against the pillar before you sat on your bed and fixing yourself. You didn’t want to be entirely a hot mess in front of him. 

“You can come in,” you said weakly, face buried in your hands. You could hear him enter slowly, the swishing of his walk as he stood in front of you. You couldn’t look at him, not now. A part of you was too devastated to even look at anybody, but also, you felt embarrassed that the first time you saw him outside of work, it was you experiencing a personal loss. “I’m sorry, this probably ruined the entire party—”

“Don’t say that,” his voice was firm. “You’re fine.” 

You sniffled, tears still coming out. A short silence permeated between you two, and you just sat there, enjoying his comforting energy. 

“Do you need a hug?”

You were silent for a moment before nodding your head.

“Yes.”

He sighed deeply, and approached closer to you. Your heart skipped a beat as you could feel his warmth and him leaning into you, grabbing your head as you two embraced tightly. His hands encompassed your small head, and with his left thumb, he rubbed the top of your head softly and gently in circles, his forehead touching yours. You sniffled again, allowing the tears to wet his sweatshirt. 

You two were like that for a while before you pulled away, wiping your cheeks. 

“What do you need?” Jungkook asked almost immediately, sitting down next to you. “A plane ticket? Do you need a ride to the airport?” 

“Uh, well…” you trailed off, unsure of what capacity Jungkook could help you. Surely, Jackson could help you get to the airport, but… “Probably a ride to Incheon.” 

Jungkook leaned in to you, putting your head on his shoulder.

“You got it.” 

Later in the week, after your parents booked a round trip to Portland, you packed your stuff the night before, eyes puffed up from crying so much. The flight was on a weekend morning, and Jungkook arrived on time, waiting for you outside of your apartment complex. You heaved, fixing yourself in the mirror with your scarf and body-forming sweater dress as you slipped into your boots, heading out with your weekend bag. 

As you arrived at the main lobby, you could see Jungkook standing outside of his Genesis G80, wearing a heavy black puffer jacket, a grey hoodie, and some black Nike sweatpants. He had his pockets in his pants, grinning at you widely as he waved for your attention. You froze for a moment in disbelief, wondering why Jungkook would risk getting a cold standing outside of his car in this insane snow. If anybody were to see you two right now, it would look like your boyfriend was picking you up for the airport (you wished!). 

Most people would wait inside the confines of their toasty warm vehicle, but Jungkook didn’t seem to mind the cold at all, walking toward you with the car trunk open. Without a word, he slipped your weekend bag into his trunk, gesturing for you to take the front seat. 

Once you settled yourself in, Jungkook took off his puffer jacket before taking the driver’s seat. He was chewing some gum, and as he bit his bottom lip to chew on his skin, he proceeded to type on his phone the address to Incheon Airport and text a few friends without showing his messages to you. You were curious, but also wondered if he was talking about you to his friends and freaking out as much as you were. 

Without saying much, he maneuvered his way into the main street and onto the highway, and as you sighed deeply, he looked at you. With one hand on the steering wheel and his other arm on the center console, he lightly touched your left arm that rested there too. It felt intimate, and the warm breath of the car matched your warming heart. Sure, you have been fancying Jungkook for the past few weeks now, but this was a whole other level. It felt comfortable and easy, something you had never experienced before. 

Something was clearly developing between you two, but both of you won’t admit that it was happening. Fear developed within, and a wave of hesitation filled you both as the sun began popping out to say hello. 

“Jungkook…”

“Mmm?” he hummed, still chewing his gum.

“You know when you feel like you’re on the precipice of crying, but you can’t seem to cry?” you asked, looking at him. “That’s how I feel right now.” 

“I’d imagine,” he replied softly as Japanese city pop played gently. “It’s been a lot, and it’s also Christmas.” 

“Yeah. I didn’t think I’d spend Christmas…well…” Your eyes began to well up before you sighed deeply once more. “I didn’t think I’d spend Christmas for a funeral, you know.” 

“Mmm…” he also exhaled. “You’ll be okay. You’ll be with your family, and it would be healing.”

You softly smiled, looking back on the road. You could feel him checking your reaction before refocusing himself. As you looked at the sideview mirror, you started to wonder if he could see you pensively thinking through it, mainly because you saw an Instagram reel last night about some dude adjusting his sideview mirror to see his beloved. 

Eventually, he got to the chaotic part (the airport), and as he swerved through several lanes to get to your terminal, you breathed easier, knowing you were closer to seeing your family again. You needed a getaway after all, and it was that time of year when, for once, you were going to be with your family. You usually spent the holidays alone, and it was long overdue that you saw your parents in particular.

You finally got to your terminal, and as expected, Jungkook went out of his way to get to your luggage first, plopping it in front of you as you thanked him endlessly for driving you to the airport at such short notice.

“Thank you, Jungkook…really.” 

“I always got you, ____,” he smiled softly, opening his arms out for a hug. You embraced him tightly, and the light Bleu De Chanel cologne scent hit your nose.

“Bye, Jungkook.”

You pulled away, and he kept smiling, pushing your luggage toward you. You grabbed the handle and started to make your way into the terminal, your heart ready to heal, and your heart ready to take Jungkook all in.