working on it

so basically it’s a movie about a princess bride. but its not happening in real life, it’s in a book. and the guy who’s reading the book? is old as fuck. and the kid he’s reading it to? is sick

every broadway show should star a hot woman playing an arrogant sassy man

sometimes I randomly get icked out by compliments bc I remember aesthetic and sexual attraction is connected for some allos

i just got the "see where your blood has gone!" email from giving blood but it glitched and just showed me my current location. which. theyre not wrong. that is where most of my blood is

do you ever sit there in your bed with your head in your hands and it's like you can just imagine 9 swords behind you

I hate you Ozempic craze I hate you 'heroin chic' I hate you weight loss ads on public radio I hate Burn Fat Fast ads every thirty seconds I hate you I hate you I hate you

why go to the grocery store or to a restaurant when you can just get food delivered why go to the mall when you can get same day shipping on amazon why go to the library when you have kindle why make art when there’s ai why go to the cinema when you can stay at home and watch netflix. we are in a loneliness epidemic btw

the loneliness epidemic was invented by BIG SHIT to sell you more SHIT

where's that picture that ruined my life

o fuck there's two of them now did they grow this one in a lab from a cutting?

Obviously he made him out of chocolate. C'mon now.

I have GOT to stop spending $30

$30 is the new $5 but $100 is still $100 #Fucked

goo goo dolls if they were in dune: and i don’t want the worm to see me

i had a meet n greet with the anaesthesiologist for my top surgery and he said it’s his favourite procedure to work on because everyone who wants it is just so truly happy to be there, and i can’t stop thinking about this career that is 99% attending to various sadnesses miseries and woes and 1% having funny little dudes in dangerfield buttonups throwing themselves on the operating table like YEEHAW LET’S GOOOO

i don’t normally add to people’s posts, but i’m an OR nurse who specializes in gender affirming surgery, and this is totally correct. when we bring the patient into the OR we always ask them what surgery they’re having (to make sure there are no oopsies) and more often than not, my top surgery patients will say “YOU’RE CUTTIN’ THESE BITCHES OFF” or “YOU’RE GONNA YEET THE TEATS” and i know i have the best job in the world.

thank you for the support, big dick wizard