wallflower

The stop for wine was quick, perhaps because they both knew what kind of wine the other wanted after months of living together. They’d begun to pick up on all of those little preferences and habits. Perhaps the speed of the trip was due to anticipation of the night spent together. Perhaps he was imagining all of it… Finn wasn’t easily flustered, but there was something about Jordyn that made him lose his mind. Their months together at Glendale had seen him acting irrationally, risking his job, sneaking around, touching her skin in the soft light of the basement…. When they stopped outside the apartment building, Finn wasn’t expecting the kiss. And then…it wasn’t a kiss. Her emerald eyes shone up at him, teasing him with the proximity of their bodies and the light tone in Jordyn’s voice. The breath Finn had been taking was frozen in his throat. With hardly a second to punctuate Jordyn’s question, Finn wrapped her into his arms and kissed her. Jordyn’s lips met his like wild sparks to kindling. As he breathed in, he breathed in the soft scent of her perfume and a desperate need began to fill his chest. He held her a little tighter and deepened the kiss. The warmth was nearly enough to make him forget the cold and snow around them. When they parted, Finn’s breath came out in a little puff of condensation. The tip of his nose and his cheekbones were lit with the soft rose of heat. “I think the date is off to a good start.” He joked, pushing his hair back. He felt the muscles in his arm shake a little. This girl had him on edge. “Let’s go get warmed up.” He suggested, placing an arm around her shoulders and leading them up the steps to the building.

Finn returned, jacket and scarf in hand. He placed a hand on the small of Jordyn’s back and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. “I can be pretty convincing.” He winked with a soft laugh. His hair was cut neatly, but his face sported a five o’clock shadow that was moving steadily towards being a beard. The stubble made him look a little older than usual, as it contained a few silver streaks. His smile was white and warm as he pulled his jacket on. “Need some help finishing that?” He teased, eyeing Jordyn’s cocktail. He’d had a couple drinks during his shift as usual, but they were barely buzzing in his system now. The rush he was riding now was the fullness and color of Jordyn’s lips and the playful look in her eyes. He wanted to kiss her hard and sit her up on the bar like they were the only ones there. But he had to be patient. The anticipation of being alone with her was beginning to feel as palpable as it had been in Glendale. Once the drink was gone, he opened the door for her and gently touched her back as they walked out into the snowy street together.

“I bet you can be.” Jordyn murmured, fully convinced that Finn was quite the persuader, it was one of his many charms. The blonde nodded and handed the remainder of her drink over to Finn, letting him finish the beverage. “Thank you for that, it was amazing!” Jordyn leaned in close to Finn’s body as his arm made it’s way round her back, her body felt on edge in the best way possible, his touch left a tingly path of goosebumps all over her skin and for once it wasn’t the cold New York winter airs fault, her petite frame actually felt warm as she fit perfectly against the older mans side. The walk to the local store was short, which Jordyn was incredibly thankful for because the last thing she wanted to be doing was removing her heels, especially with how confident they made her feel. After picking out a bottle of wine from the shop Jordyn was slightly more impatient to get back to their apartment, she loved the snow and walking around Queens at night but the cold was starting to get to her just a little, “Hey um... I can give you one of your presents early, like right now.” She stopped outside their apartment building, placing both her hands against Finn’s broad chest as she stood in front of him. “No convincing required.” Her lips curled into a gentle, inviting smile as she stood on the tip of her toes, even in heels Finn stood a lot taller than Jordyn-- she wasn’t complaining, again Finn’s height was just another charming feature about him. Their faces were only a few mere inches away from one another and green eyes searched blue hues. Was she teasing? Maybe. But Jordyn loved the confidence she gained from leaving Finn hanging on her every word or practically being able to see the want in his eyes for her. It drove her wild and made the blonde feel invincible.”Kiss me?” The question came out as more of a gentle demand. 

Finn’s face flushed. He had been sleeping next to Jordyn every night now for several weeks. He had seen her nearly naked the night of the storm at Glendale. But still they had never really been intimate….not in the way he was thinking about now. “Let me just clock out and collect my tips.” He suggested with a smile. “Then maybe we walk down to the store and grab a bottle of that wine you like.” His blue eyes were just flirting with her now. There was no doubt in his tone that the night was going to take a romantic turn. “And we take it home and drink it while I try and convince you to let me open my presents early.”

Jordyn was a fan of his idea and took a long sip of the drink he’d made her, not wanting it to go to waste. It tasted amazing and the young woman was definitely a fan of the cocktail. “That sounds perfect.” A jolt of nerves and excitement bubbled within Jordyn, the way Finn’s eyes danced over her was thrilling, she hoped that Finn never stopped having that effect on her, the ability to thrill her with just one look. The blonde picked up her phone, doubled checked she had all her belongings and waited patiently for Finn to return. “No matter how much you try, I will not be convinced.” She assured him, she’d spent far too long finding the perfect gifts to let him open them early, plus Jordyn liked the thought of teasing Finn and making him wait. 

Jordyn always told him how handsome he was. It improved Finn’s confidence far more than Jordyn could know. On this particular day, the compliment made Finn smile a little larger as he began to fix Jordyn’s drink. “I get off in just a bit actually. Dom is giving everyone the night off for Christmas Eve and tomorrow off as well.” He smiled and handed Jordyn her drink. He was eager to give Jordyn her Christmas gifts. The kitten was at a friend’s apartment and he needed to swing by and get it some time in the middle of the night if he was going to pull off the surprise he hoped to. “A drink sounds great, J.” He smiled. “We couldn’t go home with you looking so good anyway. Let’s go out somewhere nice.”

Jordyn beamed brightly after learning that Finn would have Christmas off, she was beyond excited to spend the day together and get to give him the gifts she’d picked out for him. A giddy feeling took over the blonde and she bounced on the heels of her feet, “Hurry then.” Jordyn giggled, in a flirtatious tone before leaning across the bar to kiss his cheek lightly. A confidence had grown within the young woman, she loved the way Finn looked at her, it made her feel like she could do anything and everything. “I can look this good at home as well though.” Jordyn whispered into his ear before pulling away and flashing Finn and cheeky wink. 

“It’s more of a ‘what don’t I play’ kind of thing. Mostly, guitar, drums, and piano…but I hoard instruments so I play a ton. But in my band I write the songs and sing them,” they explained. They just loved music so it was hard to try and define themself by one instrument. “Alright, that sounds pretty cool to me,” they said with a smile. “We’re rock, leaning more on the punk and glam side, but rock nonetheless. So, I am a fan of the softer, more indie stuff, too.” They listened as she explained why she was there. They were distracted for a moment at how she said ‘friend’, it didn’t seem all that friend-like, but at the mention of Blackwood their eyebrows raised. “Oh, that’s where I just moved in to. Not an awful building,” they replied.

Jordyn’s eyes lit up as she listened to Riley speak, “I’d love to hear you play one day, I’m self taught in guitar, piano and ukulele but I’m always eager to learn more.” Jordyn perked up when they mentioned living in the same building, she smiled softly. “So you’re a neighbour? I’ll probably see you around a lot more then. You’ll have to pop over to mine and we can jam together!”

“Oh, I relate to that. That’s one of my side things - music. I have a band. We never make much, but I love it. What kind of music do you do?” they asked. They were always eager to meet fellow musicians. Especially those who were struggling but still pursuing their art. They nodded as she requested another drink and set to work on it. “Ah, not the biggest physical shift, but I know coming here can be a jarring thing. What brought you here?” 

“Oh wow, really? I’ve not met anyone else in a band or anything since moving here. What do you play? Or do you sing?” Jordyn asked, intrigued as she leaned on the bar, propping her chin up under her fist. “Mainly soft rock, a bit indie-ish. They’re all sort of love songs in the form of letters at the moment.” The blonde explained. However their question about what brought Jordyn to New York threw her off a little bit and a bundle of nerves built up in her throat, restricting her words. She hated lying but equally hated hiding her past. “Um, mainly to move in with my friend, he got a place here in Blackwood and said I could stay with him for a little while.” It felt weird calling Finn her friend, considering their history and everything they felt for each other but they had no labels and Jordyn wasn’t about to explain all that to a stranger, and bore them half to death. 

“Yeah, well, it helps to pay the rent,” they said with a chuckle. If they had it their way, they’d quit both their jobs and devote themself to music entirely. But, for now, they were dealing with other people’s bodily fluids. “Especially when it’s all you’ve ever known. I’ve been a few places in the country on trips and it’s almost too quiet for me to sleep, that’s how much I’m used to it,” they laughed. They shook her hand, smiling wide. “Riley. Nice to meet you. So where are you from, if not the city?” 

Jordyn nodded, “You’re telling me, I embarrass myself every other night playing music to complete strangers to make a bit of money.” She chuckled, finishing her drink. “May I have another?” The blonde asked politely, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “Nice to meet you too, Riley. New Jersey,actually, so not too far  but I’ve only lived here for a few months. Still not fully accustomed to it all.”

“Try when they are right in front of you and then vomit all over your bar,” Riley said, crinkling their nose as they laughed. When she described what she wanted in a future, they could see the appeal. Then again, they didn’t think that they could ever leave Queens. “I’ve always lived in the city. I like the hustle and bustle. Definitely a town mouse.” 

The idea of dealing with a complete strangers vomit was abhorrent to the young woman, she turned her nose up at the thought, “Oh god, I’d never be able to cope with that. I don’t envy you.” The blonde chuckled as she took another sip of her drink, “I can appreciate that, I guess you can get accustomed to it. It’s the noise I’m not a fan of, it’s always sirens or traffic, or people shouting. Not for me.” Jordyn shook her head but offered a friendly smile to the other before introducing herself. “Sorry, I’m Jordyn. What’s your name?”

Riley leaned against the bar on their side. This was their favorite part about bartending, just chatting with people. “I suppose that’s a good point. Can’t say I’m big on the holidays, but I do appreciate the food and good naturedness. It’s just the drunk assholes that piss me off.” 

Jordyn nodded in agreement with their words, “Mhmm, I get that. Being woken up at 2 am by drunken idiots singing outside my door is the worst. I can’t wait until I have enough money to buy a house, I’d live in the middle of nowhere with no neighbours and no one to disturb me.” Was Jordyn a cynic? Not always, she could be quite a people person when she wanted to be, but serenity and peace was always far more appealing. “What about you, country mouse or town mouse?”

To my bestfriend, 

I am so glad we are back in each others lives, I can’t even begin to explain how much i missed not having you around every day but here are your gifts and I am so glad I finally get to give them to you, I suck at keeping secrets and was pretty proud of these. I figured we could have a girly night with the champagne and the necklace is so that you can never forget me, like you ever would! And I absolutely loved this getting this frame and picking through photos of us to put in it, unfortunately I couldn’t decide which picture would look best so I figured I’d leave that to you. Merry Christmas, to the most badass, beautiful woman I’ve had the absolute pleasure of meeting. 

Love your bestfriend. 

Jordyn had spent her Christmas Eve cooped up in the bedroom wrapping each gift for Finn ever so delicately, every time he attempted to come into the bedroom she protested with a loud, “Don’t even think about it! You wait out there!” Once each present was wrapped with care she piled them all up and set out writing a letter addressed to Finn. 

Finn, 

First of all, Merry Christmas. I am so glad I get to spend Christmas with you this year, so much has changed in the last 12 months and you are the biggest change that I am so incredibly grateful for. I haven’t been able to get you any gifts that express my gratitude and feelings towards you yet so I really wanted to show you how much you mean to me this year, the CD is full of songs I’ve recorded... they’re heavily inspired by you and so I figured you deserve to own the first copy. Thank you for being my muse, my support and for loving me in the hardest times I’ve ever experienced. You’ve taught me my worth. The shirts, watch and wallet are things I just thought you would get use out of and make you look good, not that you need help in that department but I hope you enjoy them. I also made brownies for us to share! The whiskey and coffee are things that I know you’d like, plus I’ve had this coffee before and it is amazing so I hope you love it! And with this busy lifestyle of yours I figured you’d need a travel mug to take out and about with you so that you’ll never be without coffee! Lastly, the cufflinks, this is my way of summarising our year, the book that started everything off between us has stuck with us and been something that we’ve always come back to so I figured it was only fitting that you had a present that revolved around our story. You deserve to be spoilt and I hope that’s how you feel right now. 

I love you. 

Jordyn. 

"God um... I hadn't really thought about that. I don't know, books? Honestly, I'd never really want anything, I'm pretty happy with everything I have right now. I'm not very materialistic. World peace maybe?"