jophi/el

Translation: Parents aren’t making the conscious effort to help their children develop necessary skills and letting iPads raise them.

Like I said, the museum was a pretty snotty institution. It’s got a LOT of objects it’s way famous for possessing, but nobody knew about the absolutely massive collection of Moche erotic pottery it had because the curators were totally embarrassed by this stuff.

Some examples:

Pretty hot shit, right? They never, ever put any of this stuff on public view or published it in any catalogues but - we legit had like several hundred pieces of Moche ceramics in the “dirty pots” category. Anyway, I was left alone to just do my job with regard to the database for several years, ok? And I figured, well, these’re accessioned objects in the museum’s collection - better get down to bidness. 

I catalogued every goddamn bestiality, necrophiliac, cocksucking, buttfucking, detached penis, and giant vulva drinking cup in that collection. I’d be like, 

A drinking vessel in form of a standing man wearing a tunic and cap. He holds an oversized erection in his hands and stares into the distance (note I did not say “like he’s hella-constipated”). The vessel has a hole at both the tip of the penis as well as around the rim of the figure’s head, thus forcing the drinker to drink only from the penis or risk spilling wine all over themselves from the top of the vessel. Red and orange slip covers the surface of the piece.

Pretty straightforward, right? Apparently the deep seated fear of these objects that the curators exhibited was meant to spread to me as well, but - no one ever gave me that memo, because I guess Midwesterners reproduce asexually. When the curators understood that I had catalogued all of these objects in addition to the other, non-sexy pieces in the collection, they were apparently livid, but knew they had no legs to stand on in terms of getting pissed at me for it. 

I visited the museum’s online public access database a few years back and - every single description I wrote of these pieces has been totally neutered to say something like Male figural vase. 

save the princess! bonus (S3 SPOILERS):

⬇️ Vetted ⬇️

On Aug. 12, the FDA reclassified a recall for nearly 1.6 million dozen white and brown cage-free eggs due to potential salmonella contamination. The recall is now Class I, which is considered "a situation in which there is a reasonable probability that the use of or exposure to a violative product will cause serious adverse health consequences or death," according to the FDA.

As of July 24, a salmonella outbreak linked to the recalled eggs has sickened at least 98 people and hospitalized 26 across 17 states. The illnesses were reported between Nov. 21, 2025, and June 30, 2026. The FDA and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) were aware of 26 hospitalizations due to the recall, but no deaths.

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it's..guys it's like a pinterest get it....

like..like when you have ad blocker on on ur pinterest page....guys