OOPSPROMPTS / SENTENCE STARTERS.
Quotes & sentences taken from the writing prompt Tumblr blog, oopsprompts. Feel free to change the sentences as you see fit.
Some sentences have been altered to fit in more general contexts.
TW: Threats of violence, mentions of gore/blood, mentions of murder, mentions of death, mentions of/use of weaponry.
“Do you want the long version, the short version, or the fun version?”
“It was a pickup line. Why can’t you ever be normal?!”
“Maybe there were no right choices in that situation, but you definitely made a wrong one.”
“That’s impossible. I’m constantly monitoring your location and biological signals, and not only do you not have any vitamin deficiencies, but you haven’t seen a doctor in--”
“Please stop saying that every time I enter a room.”
“This isn’t some fun little adventure story! This is my life you’re ruining!”
“In this house. We. Talk. About. Our. Feelings!”
“Try not to die; I’ve become emotionally invested in you.”
“We don’t all have the ability to just decide what we will or won’t care about, you know.”
“You can’t save the universe with friendship. You can’t even save yourself with it.”
“We could be friends in this life if you weren’t such an ass.”
“These are nice boots. I’m not getting your blood on them.”
“In my defense, this is hilarious, and I do believe you’ll learn to see the humor in it once you’re done kicking my ass.”
“I knew it was all over when my partner and my nemesis started roasting me together.”
“I wouldn’t call myself homicidal. I just want to kill one specific person.”
“I’m a man of my word, and right now my word is ‘kill’!”
“Usually it’s the bad guys who go around killing witnesses, so...”
“You know when I said that there was no such thing as being bad at this? I was wrong. You’re bad at this.”
“Excuse me? I’m not ‘just’ a bastard; I am the ultimate bastard.”
“Unless you’re here to kill me immediately, you may as well sit down.”
“What happened? It looks like someone died in here.”
“I assume that you don’t like me, because I’ve said some stupid stuff to you, and that’s fine. I just wanted to let you know that the feeling isn’t mutual; I like you, and if you ever need a hand, I’m here.”
“I am an artificial intelligence primarily devoted to monitoring and analyzing behavioral patterns. Of course I know memes.”
“I’m not an animal. You can’t win my trust by speaking softly and giving me food.”
“I don’t have ‘authority issues.’ I have one authority issue, and that is that I should be the authority.“
“Why is it always murder and mayhem with you? Don’t you ever just do normal person things? Eat a sandwich? Brush your teeth? Do you even brush your teeth?”
“I hate to break it to you, but present you is pretty terrible too.”
“I mean, tearing someone’s heart out with my bare hands wouldn’t have been my go-to, but it does solve the problem.”
“Look, I am this close to killing you for what you’ve done here, so if you want to live, you’re going to be very, very nice to me.”
“Why can’t you just... be better?”
“You have that look in your eye. You know, that ‘I’m about to do something that makes me a bad robot’ look.”
“Exactly-- you’re going to hate it, and watching you suffer will entertain me.”
“Look, I’m not a hero or anything, but I am going to take a stand with the good guys because they’re much less likely to stab me in the back.”
“Most of my interactions with other people are warning shots.”
“I’ve done too much fighting for you to let you give up and die now.”
“I really think that if the person I’m in prison for murdering has come back to life, I should be let out.”
“Don’t look at me all concerned. You forfeited any right to worry about me when you tried to kill me as I lay injured and helpless.”
“I was trying so hard to be nonthreatening but I just couldn’t resist the urge.”
“What kind of idiot punches a robot in the face?”
"You can't just-- hey! You can't just say things like that to people and walk away!"
“I think we could be really good friends, if only you weren’t such an awful person.”
“I worship a trickster God; he won’t mind!”
“Look, my first choice would have been to kill you, but since that’s off the table, I’m going to make you be a better person whether you like it or not.”
“I’m the brains in this operation?! Oh, we are in so much more trouble than I thought.”
"I love the law and doing legal things like not trespassing and, uh, eating sandwiches."
"This is a win-win for me. If you tell me, I win, because I get my information; but if you don’t tell me, I also win, because I get to hurt you.”
"That is a really personal thing to say to someone you only met three days ago."
“The best tool a liar can have is a reputation for telling the truth.”
“I don’t make threats. I make promises.”
“I know who you’re pretending to be.”
“You’re always focusing on what I did. I think I deserve a little credit for all the things I could’ve done but chose not to.”
“Do you ever say anything besides asking me to shut up?”
“I don’t care how heartless you think I am, but do not think me stupid.”
