Dark Corner, My Corner

Since you want me out so bad, I’ll just go.

They didn’t tell me she had cancer until after her surgery. That’s when it all started to go down hill, and I found myself losing my trust because after that, all I could ever think was “what else have they not told me?”

Growing up, I didn’t want. There was nothing I wanted to do. I didn’t want to play sports, create art, or anything. Looking back, I was just trying to make it through the day. I was just trying to survive. But the question is, survive what?

Why can’t I do anything right? I can make a 100% on a test, but I can’t land a fucking job. I can write an essay, but I can’t talk to people. I can make straight A’s, but I can’t learn from my mistakes. What the fuck is wrong with me? Why am I blue?

I do not want, and it’s killing me.

I’m sorry for breathing.

My best friend told me she was raped. I told her “are you sure?”

My grandfather passed away when I was 7 or 8 years old. I have a few memories associated with him, but for the most part, I remember that he used to be really rough whenever he would play with me, and I hated it. One thing he used to do would be he would pinch my thumb really hard so as to hold me in place, preventing me from running away. He’d laugh; I’d cry. I hated it. I hated it so much that…

Don’t talk about me behind my back

I want to start over.

The electricity is loud today

Why don’t I have a first memory?

I was about six or seven years old when my grandfather passed away. I don’t remember much from that time, but one thing I do remember is praying to God in front of the casket saying, “Thank you God for taking this man away from me.” He used to be very rough when he played/messed around with me, and I didn’t like it. It’s taken me almost 20 years, but I am now wondering if there was more to it…

What gives you a voice is the right to freedom of speech, but what gives you a voice that people will listen to is education.

I’m struggling to find the will to keep playing. I’ve worked hard for 25 years, and yet I don’t have what I want. Fuck you and your system!

I would rather the game end than to lose.

I have spent all my life wanting and pursuing happiness. Only now have I ever realized that I have never really felt happy. If you’d ask me what happiness feels like, I couldn’t describe it for you. I can and have smiled before. I know how to laugh and to have a good time. But those have only ever been a distraction to the true emptiness I feel inside. I know how to feel happy, but I don’t know…