characters: eun jiwon/you

warnings: swearing

- Let's go, - you find yourself already in rather giant slippers, but it's still better than giant heels. Jiwon looks up at you and you put your hand on his cheek, caressing warm skin for a moment.

- Thank you, - he stands up, helping you get out of the car and you follow wherever he guides you to.

- It's chilly without your hands on my legs, - we are dying tomorrow, so today we are taking the best from life. 

You hear his laughter again, entering the door he opened for you. 

- I wish I could see your face in the morning, - if your drunken flirting in the toilet didn't get him, then his low and hot whisper to your ear made you.. let's say, excited, - It will be priceless. You will remember everything and I would pay to see it. 

You want to spank off his smug sarcastic expression from his face, but he is way too right. 

- No regrets, - you sniff loudly as a tough woman that you are and you both laugh quietly to not to disturb anyone. But there is no one anyway, - I want.. something spicy. Do they have sandwiches?

- I thought you were going to eat pies or something, - he is still supporting your waist so you follow him obediently, looking around while you have a chance. 

- Fuck yeah I will, but I need an appetizer, - he nods knowingly and you both smile again. 

You can't ignore a feeling that this situation looks suspiciously dreamy from the side. 

It's a date. 

It is. 

It looks like it, so it is. 

You smile wider because of your logical inferences and hug his hand, bumping your face into his upper arm while he places an order. When there's no air in your lungs anymore, you press your cheek to the soft material and look to the opposite side of the counter. Staring into the big windows into the night street, you feel such a relaxing emptiness in your head. Instead of millions of thoughts at once, there is one giant nothing. And it's.. The best. Exactly what you needed. 

You feel him shifting then placing his palm on the back of your neck, making you look up a bit. 

- It's perfect, - you bump your chin into his shoulder for support, smiling slowly and he looks above your head, frowning. 

- What? - Jiwon doesn't seem to understand what you are talking about and that makes you giggle, - What? 

- Thank you, - you look away from him because that started to look like a perfect situation for a kiss (and you can't bear a thought about a kiss with Eun Jiwon) and continue to stare at the window alone with your perfect comfort inside. 

You have no idea how much time passed until he started to move and you turn around, seeing two paper packages on a counter and a plate with two cups in his hand. 

- Oh, I'll take them, - you  take packages way too fast and he shrugs his shoulders, saying goodbye to a barista. You do the same and let him guide out, - Thought it would be too heavy for you, decided to be considerate for elders. 

Before his annoyed face turns into a beat for your ass (you wish), you place a finger on his lips, making annoyingly polite face. 

- Don't say a word. I understand that it might be hard for you to ask for help, bu-.., - Jiwon bites the tip of your finger with a straight face, looking as strict as ever and you sure look like a deer caught in headlights because he can't keep a face for long, bursting into laughter after letting your finger out. 

- I will not feed you, - he's still laughing, opening cardoor for you and this time, you get inside on your own and before he takes his driver place, you open a sandwich from a package and bite it. So when he looks at you with 'are you fucking kidding me' face you are aggressively chew a sandwich with a face of a winner. 

- It was my sandwich, - he still has 'are you fucking kidding me' face and you stop chewing immediately, placing it back into a paper box. 

- Have a good meal, - you place it on his knees, smiling with a fake polite smile, trying to not to chew what is left in your mouth but fail, - It's too delicious. 

- It is, - Jiwon stops his 'strict' perfomance and gives you a cup which has 'no caffeine' on it and you smile at his care again, - Try yours. I asked to make it spicy. 

You nod, taking a sip of a drink, feeling how it spreads all around your body in a giant warm and sweet wave. You roll your eyes at the feeling and tilt your head backwards, enjoying the taste.

- You ate almost half, how is that possible, - you hear smile in his voice and it makes you happy again. You place a cup in a cup holder and open yours, taking a bite. 

- I can spit it, - Jiwon looks at you with all the same face and.. well, you were expecting it. 

- I'd prefer you to swallow, - you both know it. The tension in the car is so obvious, you both know it's there. You feel your breath hitchin and Jiwon sips on his coffee, looking away from you.

- As you like, - you see it; you see it so clearly. The way his defense cracks up just enough to see what he really feels. Jiwon closes his eyes slowly, biting his lip and shift in his seat, gulping. You don't know what is under his eyelids; but you for sure know who. 

It's silence for a short moment, before he recovers and lean back on a seat, biting a sandwich way too aggressively. 

- Calm down, - you laugh, trying to not to make it awkward and he gives you a look worth a million words, - Sorry. 

Somehow, you can't feel awkwardness. Even if because all the rules, you must. It's natural with him and you know it's the same for him. 

It makes everything so much better. 

- Eat you food, please, I beg you, - you know it's just a polite way to say 'shut up already for God's sake' and you generously decide to give him a rest. It's not your stomach singing serenades, no. Absolutely not. 

And everything is just perfect. All the  ambiguous teasing, and natural softness that sparks in you when you look at him, and laughter that doesn't feel fake even a bit. You feel like crying when hours of driving around pass. You don't want to go. You want to stay with him; not in a sexual way nor in a romantic. Just with a.. person that he is. 

A perfect person for you. 

You were more than just 'unstable' when you called him and it took a few hours for him to bring peace into your head back. 

The last thing you want is to let him go. 

- I lost my phone, - you are standing in front of the door to your apartment, trying to find something to spend a few more minutes with him; fighting your brain falling asleep. Because you basically can't even stand properly. 

- Sleep first, - he's so calm about it and you pout, knowing that nothing will work. 

- Of course you are calm, it's not you who lost it, - Jiwon laughs, supporting you when you poke his chest with a finger. 

- You are half asleep and still as vicious as ever, - you end up in hugging him, pressing your face to the his on his neck again. He smells perfect. 

- It's the way I flirt, - he pats your head and you swear you felt his lips on your temple. Feeling how your heart goes straight to your feet, you look up on him and bite your lower lip just enough hard to not to say what you are about to say; you will do it anyway, - It's a perfect timing for a kiss. 

He nods, looking away with a tiny smirk on his face and you feel him taking a deep big breath. 

- It is, - Jiwon leans closer and you can't bear it anymore. You swear you can't. Your whole body trembles with anticipation and it didn't happen even with your kiss; fuck, you don't remember feeling like that in forever. You press the back of his neck in an attempt to make him do it faster and he stops moving right before his lips touch yours, - Don't rush it. Feel it. 

The time stops; you close your eyes, feeling his breath tingling on your lips and you do as he says; you feel him. You feel the way his breath hitch when your lips touch; for a brief moment, making you sigh in surprise. He does it again, but staying for longer and you grip gently long hair on his nape, asking for more. You feel him pulling back a little and you meet his eyes glued on yours when you open them; his gaze can make you do anything. It's devouring, you are done. 

And he didn't even kiss you properly. 

- I need to g-.., - you mutter harsh 'fuck no' and almost press him into you, not giving a chance to move and.. Jiwon has no plans to fight back. His lips guide your the way he wants and you are not complaining at all; his kiss is perfectly warm, wet and so terribly skilled. Your head is spinning on the fifteenth second, you moan into his lips on the thirties and it takes him one minute to make you wet. His lips are moving in a perfect  sync with yours; he lets you take a breath as if he knows when to; and he makes sure to answer with a low quite groan on every your little moans, sending vibrations all over your body straight to where you want to feel him the most now. 

You have no idea how much you spent on the best kiss of your life, but when you woke up from it, he was pressing you to a wall with a hand sliding up your tight slowly.

You gasp for air, with your head still spinning like crazy and the best thing about it is the way Jiwon looks. Focused, messy and so turned on, biting swollen lip hard while staring into your eyes as if he's going to eat you. 

It's written all over your face that you will one thousand percent let him do anything he wants and it makes his life so much worse. 

He shuts his eyes and you know that it's over. 

- Look at me, - you place both your hands on his cheeks, waiting before he opens his eyes and now it's just.. concern and distance. Distance as far as possible from you, - Don't fucking dare do that. I kissed you. I wanted it. I'm not sixteen or some shit, stop making it seem like I cannot be touched. 

- It's not i-.. - he starts to rant, but not now. Boost of adrenaline and endorphin in your body made your mind perfectly clean and fearless. 

- Treat me as your equal, not as a young clueless girl, - you kiss him right below his lips, putting an ebd of a topic and push him a little, getting out of his arms, - I wouldn't have said that if I wasn't sure that I attract you. At least, physically. 

Jiwon seem to think, frowning and he looks away from you, as he always does when he's being caught off guard. 

- Sleep tight, - you put your hands on his shoulders to pull him closer, pressing your lips to his cheek softly, - Thank you for tonight. 

You weren't going to apologize like you did the last time, because now you believe that you didn't do anything wrong. And the fact that Jiwon placed the same soft kiss on your forehead before saying 'good night' proves your point. 

You are not asking him to start dating you, or fuck you into any given surface (haha.. jk.. unless?..), you just want him to stop pushing his desires away. 

The last thing you are hoping for while crawling in bed is to not to die out of shame tomorrow. 

characters: eun jiwon/you

warnings: swearing.

Any effort that you have spent on calling him is so worth it. In that situation, you didn't want to compare anyone. You didn't want to compare him to anyone. 

Because it was him who stayed calm through all of your slow mumbling when ypu tried to remember where you are in the first place. It was him who has gotten into his car to drive to you without even the smallest question, who has been staying calm and reassuring; because he kept on talking to you, without any sign of shaming you for getting into a situation you are currently in. No sign of annoyance that you made him do all of these. He made it to a club in ten minutes; just a little bit longer than the phone call in which your ex said to go call a taxi. 

The problem is, you relaxed to the point where you didn't want to even move. Weird feeling of your body being.. distant, unfamiliar. The thought of him being already here made your right mind do the thing it wanted for so long: shut down. 

- You hear me? Where are you? - you hear his voice through your phone and the music pounding everywhere makes you pout. You giggle, adjusting a short dress with one hand.

- I don't know, - you giggle again, finding it hella funny and he does it again; not even a sign of irritated sigh. 

- Take a deep breath, - you do as he says, trying not to laugh because you just feel like it. But it's impossible when all that you have been drinking today is attacking your brain. All you wanted to do is have fun; but your body didn't want to listen. What a pity, - Another one, c'mon, - he interrupts your thoughts and you do as he says again, - What do you see? 

You look around, seeing way too many things at once; frowning, you feel your mood shifting when you remember what you were doing few minutes ago. But you forgot what he was asking; suddenly you want to cry out of helpless feeling. 

- Can I take a deep breath again? - you almost whisper, experiencing a rare glimpse of clear mind. 

- Of course. In, - you inhale deeply, closing your eyes and sitting straight for no reason, - Out, - you exhale, opening your eyes, - Where are you? 

He repeats his question and you answer, remembering surprisingly clearly how to get there. And while he's at it, you continue to breath properly, trying to not to lose your thoughts again. 

You even try to stand up, swearing for all the heels in the world for the fact of their existence and for a short moment you think that meeting him in the condition you are in.. you are totally screwed. Jiwon won't ever want to talk to you after tonight. You were scared to death when you called him and now when you realize that no one followed you, no one tried to hunt you or some shit.. it was just noise about nothing. Just you getting too drunk to move. Suddenly you are so ashamed to see him, but you really can't walk by yourself. God, you can't even stand without holding on a sink for dear life.

You lean on a wall, sliding down it slowly, trying to hold back tears again. You life slides down just the same, but ten times faster. And you can't stop any of it. 

When you feel his hands on your waist, pulling you up gently, you just.. you lean into him with all the strength you can manage. Your body feels like a pillow, but you grip into the soft material on his shoulders to the point your knuckles hurt. 

Jiwon doesn't say anything, letting you hug him tighter and pats your head softly. Being in his embrace is so.. safe. You wanted nothing more but to stand like this forever, pressing your forehead into the crook of his neck, trying to match your erratic breath to his. Steady and perfectly calm. 

- Hi, - you wiggle your head in panic, gripping his shoulders hard. You feel his chest moving as if he's making a deep breath, - Look at me. 

You ignore him for a moment, not being able to escape the warmth of his skin and finally surrender to gentle strokes of his fingers on your nape. 

- We need to go, - he looks so much different from what he usually is. He now has an undescriable soft look on his face and you are so into it that you don't notice the panic he's also currently is. 

Jiwon tries his best to keep you sure that he has everything under control when in reality, he has no fucking idea on what to do next. He's genuinely as scared as you are. 

- It will be better with fresh air, - you look at him smiling gently at you and you pout, feeling your thoughts running wild in your head again. You are not able to say anything, just hold onto him like crazy when you realize that you are actually getting just a bit better. Probably because of all the blood that rushed to you brain when he picked you up, but now you, at least, can stay on your own, - Any plans for blacking out? Say before we move, okay? 

You laugh, loving the way he 'carefully' choose words to communicate and just because you find everything funny now. 

- Will not, - you giggle, leaning backwards on the hand that he supports your head with, - But I'm full of surprises! 

You exclaime it in the brightest tone you could possibly manage and hear him chuckle, smiling with that 'oh yes' expression. 

There will be so. much. shame. tomorrow. 

A shit load of shame. 

Jiwon looks in the mirror, scanning your reflection for a second and you judge his look in the worst way possible. As if he's checking you out. 

Which he clearly not doing. 

More shame for what you are about to say. 

- I saw you looking at me at the rehearsal, - you lean into him again, clumsy pressing your lips to his ear to whisper, - Why did you really leave today? 

Either your flirting skills are rusty or the state where you barely move your tongue to speak doesn't turn him on, but Jiwon laughs, trying to move you away a little, so you would be able to go. 

- Let's go. I won't pick you up, - you pout, immediately forgetting about your words and surrender to him, letting him go so he could grip your waist, - Can you go? 

You can. It would be hard, but you can. But you really (10x times) want him to pick you up. You look at him, leaning on his shoulder and wiggle your head, gripping into his arm harder. 

- No, - you pursue your lips, trying to make those 'puppy eyes' (which is kinda difficult when you can't focus at one spot for more than two seconds) and blink, feeling him letting you go easily and going to the door. 

- Wait here then, I'll bring you a sweatshirt, because your dress is.. - you run for him the moment he touches a door handle and he doesn't finish his sentence, satisfyingly nodding when you realize that you failed in lying to him. 

- I hate you, - you whisper through gripped teeth and he smiles, supporting you with his hands again, - My dress what? 

Jiwon doesn't answer because the music is too loud and he frowns, making his way to an exit. It's just the way you wanted it to be; you don't look around in horror or don't put your last will to not to fall. He secures you in all the places. If you weren't so drunk, you would probably appreciate it on fullest, but know you just focus on moving your legs. 

And the moment you both step out of the club on the chilly fresh air, it kicks your head immediately. You still lost and on the verge of unconsciousness, but now a lot more actively. 

- It's so cold, - you exlaim it loudly, tucking his warm sweater and whine, shiwering. 

- You should probably wear at least three pieces of clothes to not to get cold. Just saying, - you frown, counting everything you have on yourself and grin brightly. 

- So you did notice I don't wear anything under! Got ya! - his 'what the fuck?', no, 'What The Fuck?!' face made you rewise your words a little and you giggle, - Relax, I was talking about m- 

- I don't want to know, - he shakes his head, taking car keys out of his pocket and pressing buttons, until it makes a sound. 

- But it's just m..

- Baby shark tududu, mommy shark tududu, - Jiwon keeps on singing, opening a door for you and helping you to get in right after and you laugh out loud, leaning on the car seat comfortably, when he gets down a little to help you put your legs into a car. 

- Okay, I'll let you sleep comfortably tonight, - he smiles and bows his head, laughing, hiding his smile with his palm, as he usually does. You start to genuinely hate that habit. 

- Thank you a lot, - you hear a sarcasm in his voice but you bravely choose to ignore it, - Maybe I should get you to a hospital? It happened for you before? Are you sure you will br alright? You are not living alone, so you have someone to take care of you? Right? 

He asks a question after a question and you realize you didn't tell him about something you have drunk that made you... as it made you. He's just here because he was ready to take care of you being drunk. You feel like you are about to cry again because of all the feels his genuine care brought up in you and it is probably written on your face; because Jiwon's face is priceless. 

- I don't know what question is wrong, but I am extremely sorry, just don't cry, - you look at him, knowing that you don't think about anything right know, just stare at him and blink. 

- Can you stay with me for some time? My mom will kill me if I would come back.. like this, - you sigh, watching him thinking and smile brightly when he nods, ready to close the door, - And I am so, so, so cold.

You don't know what you want him to do, but your mood tells you to continue asking him for stuff. Jiwon seems to be very generous today, because he sighs, closing the door, leaving you in almost warm comfort of his car and comes back in no time, giving you a sweatshirt and a.. sleepers? 

- Ho..

- Suitcase that my stylist gave me for the new shooting is in the trunk. So yeah, - he starts the car, turning a little away from you to mind his business. It's.. Is he a magician of some sort? The fuck? 

- It couldn't be real, - you chuckle, trying to adjust clothes in your hands properly and he looks at you curiously. Jiwon can't be such a sweet precious puppy. He can't. You whine loudly, turning away from him and squeezing soft sweatshirt in your hands, - How the fuck are you so good? Stop, I beg you, I can't bear it, stop. It's too much, for real, stop. 

You continue on your whining, bumping your head on the seat a few times just to prove a point and hear him laughing. Jiwon looks away from you the moment you turn your head to him, but God you see how eyes sparkle brightly and it makes all the butterflies in your stomach run wild. 

You can't fall in love with him. 

But how can you not if he's.. Like that. 

- Don't play shy and cute, I know all those tricks, they don't work on me, - you mumble it with fake anger, trying to put sweatshirt again and sigh in relief when he takes it out of your hands. 

- They do, - you can't answer because he shuts you with putting a hoodie on your head. Rather harsh for your liking, but still made you go all sorts of akdhsown. Before you suffocate, his hand grabs your gently, guiding each one through the sleeves. You forget what you wanted to say; basically everything is blurry and unstable for you now. You swear your attention can't focus for more than 20 seconds. Jiwon uses it as he likes and you love it. 

- Thank you, - you mutter it quietly, adjusting his dark hoodie. It has something written on it but since you can't read right now, you just give up on it. It's just above your dress. Really huge. Super soft. Extra cozy. 

- Are you sure you don't need to see a doctor? - he seems to be into his phone for a moment, typing something and then looks at you again, sighing. 

- No, I'm.. - he leans closer. Too close. And closer. Right until he grabs a seatbelt, tucking it into the right place. His scent again is all over you and you swear you was barely able to suppress a moan. For no reason. He sent tiny tingling feeling all over your body without even touching you and your imagination did the rest. That's, probably, the reason, - That was so smooth, my God. 

You pretend to faint and he smiles again, chuckling and you finally move away from a place you never want to be in again. He made your brain relax and recover a bit, but in the morning you will remember everything. You just now choose to ignore it. 

You desperately want to take a rest. 

- Where are we going? - you look around, shifting comfortably in a warm seat and stop your eyes on him. 

- Where do you want to go? - Jiwon looks at you for a moment and you pout, shrugging your shoulders. You have no idea. 

- Thank you for making time to drive me from there, - you almost stare at him because you physically can't look anywhere else. You have never denied that he is handsome, but he is so fucking handsome. 

- It's okay. I understand, - you know what he means and you purse your lips, biting on the lower one, - I'm glad that you asked for help. Thank you for.. trust, I think. 

- I owe you, - he smiles, shaking his head as 'no' and you know that you won't be able to repay him anyway. 

- Be careful next time, okay? - you notice the way his tone changes from calm and mature to.. as if he's talking to a child. That type of tone. Even his intonation is different and it makes your heart tumble again. He's so soft. 

You nod, not taking your eyes off his side profile and sigh loudly, blinking slowly. 

You don't know where he's going to take you and you don't care until he's here. You close your eyes, trying to find peace within yourself. It seems like something impossible, but you surely got a lot better. Yet you decided to ignore everything and just let him support you. You will not cross the lines, but his genuine care and attention makes wonders to you. You desperately need some wonders. 

- Hey, - he calls your name softly and you open your eyes, smiling, seeing him parking already, - I thought you were sleeping. 

- I'm not sleepy, - looking around you still can't guess where you are and just go with whatever, - Yet you still decided to wake me up. 

- Of course. It's not fair if you sleep and I don't, - he fakes seriousness and you laugh, nodding as 'yeah tell that story again' until he gives up, - Put on slippers. 

- I'm in a hoodie. Carry me, - you pout, looking at him and Jiwon has that undescriable cute and annoyed look on his face.

- I'm forty years old, I can't carry myself if I stand up too fast, what do you want from me, - he still tries to make you guilty but you don't feel anything about it. Shame comes tomorrow. 

- And I thought you were still able to get it.. - you pout  as if you are disappointed, looking away from him and start to change your shoes. The problem is that you can't win that goddamn heels you choose to wear, because you can't even bend too low, because you head start spinning like crazy. 

- I hear it from someone who can't even take her shoes off, - he mocks you and you look at him in righteous rage, pursuing your lips into a thin line, - What? I can do that. 

He demonstrates you as he takes of one of his sneakers and puts it back again. You breath heavily trying to fight back but immediately surrender after trying to kick your heels off one of your legs. 

- Help me, - you whine softly and the way he smiles breaks your heart again. 

Jiwon is someone you will never be worth of. You love yourself very much but at the same time understand what he meant that evening when he rejected you. What he wants from a woman now; is so much more than you can give. 

You lean on a seat, waiting for him to open the door from your side, squatting down.

- I brought you to my favorite coffee shop. You can't drink coffee now, but.. - Jiwon continues to talk, but all you can think of is the way he softly touches your ankles, taking your shoes off you. It's not that turning on feeling that he gave you earlier; you just feel your heart bursting from how much softness you feel for him. 

Unable to fight an urge to brush your fingers through his hair, you put a hand on his nape, patting him slowly. It feels just as you imagined; soft and silky. He never stops as if nothing happened but you feel his fingers linger on your skin just a little longer than necessary. Just so you could notice the difference. 

I hate descriptions. Just read.

characters: you/eun jiwon.

warnings: alcohol usage, swearing.

And even after what happened, you still needed to work with him. Today you felt a lot better (who wouldn't after crying for two hours and sleeping for eight) and that's why the mood was absolutely amazing. Of course, not temporary. Because the moment you step in the practice room, you are met by minimum five different glances. They don't even try to hide themselves. Apparently, you would need to deal with it until a new reason for gossips wouldn't appear. It's natural for a group of people like that; you would even be the one of the hungry who's glancing, if possible.

The worst thing is, they never said they would stop talking to you. Which means that you should constantly be conscious about your words; every of them would lead to new and new gossip.

- Hey, is this true? You and Sungha are... - a girl in front of you makes cutting her throat move with a hand and you laugh, simply nodding. That's exactly what you two did.

- Yeah, so what? Any plans? - she laughs again and you find it genuine. At the end, they just want entertainment. Maybe you are even same whenever drama happens. It's just tough to be on receiving side.

- For you, girl, only for you, - she winks and you do the same, finding it so light to joke around after you thought everyone would hate you.

- Call me then, - taking off your hoodie, you hear everyone standing up and bow and.. it feels weird now. Even though you were thinking about yesterday since, well, yesterday, you still have no idea what was on his mind. And what was on yours, actually, too.

- Guess I'll need to take a line on that, - you hear her talking again, taking your eyes off Jiwon who's now speaking with someone else and shake your head, shoving your clothes into the bag.

- What do you mean? Literally no line. And I don't think I want to think about men in general right now, - it's true though. You want to rest, not waste your nerves on little boys again. Maybe a little bit later.

- You were staring at Eun Jiwon with those big puppy eyes like he broke your heart yesterday and judging by the fact that Sungha is literally standing at the other corner of the room glaring at him like he's about to commit murder and, - she emphasizes and you look over to Sungha to check, but she continues and you forger about it, screaming internally, - Since you and Jiwon left together yesterday, I do have some, you know, assumptions, - she's silent for a moment, giving you a chance to answer and you don't know what to answer expect 'how the fuck do you know we left together?' but there is no need in that, to be honest. If she knows, everyone do, - So, under what number should I wait?

- Why are you.. bullying me? - you can't make up a straight face for too long and the next moment you two just laugh, until the choreographer exclaims that the rehearsal is starting, - We just had a few drinks. That's it.

And maybe he actually broke your heart a tiniest little. Just enough to make you want to torture him today.

- Hi, - you smile at him, bowing a little and he nods, not looking like he hates you or something. That's a win, so far so great.

- Are going to beat me up today again? - Jiwon makes that cute face again and you smile, shrugging your shoulders and making a low ponytail.

- Fuck yes, absolutely, - you are kidding, of course. Somehow it still eats you that yesterday you were dancing like a dirty rag so today you are about to show why you were taken in YG in the first place. It's time to show off.

- Did you just swear at me? - Jiwon tries his best to be in strict mode, but his face, as usual, tells you absolutely different.

You know that he likes you. Not, maybe, as a person. But who knows? And probably not as a woman, as we get know after yesterday. Yet he wouldn't treat you the same way that he does if he wouldn't find you.. at least nice. Hopefully.

- Yeah, I did, - you smile with the widest smile you can possibly manage and he nods, not saying a word but you can see how his eyes sparkle and little dimples when he pouts, looking in the mirror. You.. kinda like him too.

You don't want to fall in love with him, God, absolutely not. And you don't want him to do the same. Because it will end in a disaster. But.. just messing around would be nice.

You can tell that he thinks the same when you catch his glare roaming on you and how quickly he looks away. Jiwon also wants to play, but he grips himself so hard to not to.

Why?

The music starts to play and you would lie if you tell that you don't like this song. The rhythms are great; the song itself is not something you would hear on daily basis, because it's typically not your style, but it's stupid to deny that it's unique and fresh.

Apparently it's not the rhythm and lyrics of the song that makes it the best; it's the choreography where you need to be all around him without making excuses. Jiwon moves at ease, literally not putting any effort, yet he manages to look gorgeous. If you would do the same.. we all saw what happened yesterday, right? His feet won't bear another time.

Jiwon barely touches you, just small support on your waist here and there. Well maybe that's because he should actually be singing the song during a concert. You can't deny the fact that you are genuinely upset about it.

But what you were not upset about is that you had a chance to show off in front of him and blame it all on choreography. God, you have no idea why in the world you are so determined. All the moves are performed at least on 146% and you just know he looks at you. He's very serious when it comes to something like that, you even think he's the most professional one in this room, but it's undeniable how his eyes are tracing over your body whenever he has a chance. Jiwon is very conscious, but when he looks at you; he makes sure you notice it. It's hot.

And it's all fun games, but when practice actually starts, it's.. Difficult. Your legs hurt, you feel your head spin and all your clothes soaked with sweat because no matter how cold it is and how light dance is, it is still impossible to stay sane. Yeah, you wanted to show off, but at what cost? Gulping on water hungrily, you brush wet hair from up your forehead, trying to calm your breath.

Yeah. Showing off. Great idea. Never doing it again.

You fall on a bench, desperately fighting a desire to get naked under freezing cold water. But even if you feel like shit in the middle pf a desert and all your limbs tremble slightly, it always feels amazing. And not because at some point Jiwon was looking at your ass more than in the mirror. No. Totally not the point. Absolutely not.

You know the break won't be infinite so you stand up, make your hair look better than sticking sausages and get ready to head out for another round, when you hear one of the dancers calling your name. You do remember him. You even remember that he asked you to join his party today. Was it delusional to hope your invitation would be cancelled because of the break up? Because it seems like people want to talk to you even more.

- So I wanted to remind you that you absolutely have no chance of sliding off today, - he puts ans arm on your shoulder and it feels.. disgusting. Not because it's him and you find this guy fishy, but because it just feels.. uncomfortable. You shrug your shoulder, to make sure he feels the hint under your gesture, - Put on your best dress, I want everyone to look perfect. It will be in a hella fancy style, so don't let me down!

He smiles and.. he doesn't want anything bad. He's just too friendly and weird. It's not your type of a.. persona. Yet putting your best dress sounds nice. But knowing Sungha would be there, it's going to be a mess if you'd come. The guy seems to notice your uncertainty, laughing loudly.

- You already said yes, I prepared a seat for you. I accept no 'no's', - you think he doesn't care you never really said anything related to 'yes'.

- I won't stay for a long time, okay? I need to help my mom, - you always bring up your parents whenever you feel like saying 'no' would be troublesome. No one argues with it, perfect plan.

- We'll see about that, - he winks and you find it extremely uncomfortable. The evening is promised to be 'amazing'.

After a mere moment, you come back to your position when the main choreographer walks in, but Jiwon is nowhere to be seen and you frown, tilting your head.

And you swear you blacked on for a second after realising that you hoped, desperately, for him to be late, because you wanted nothing more but spend some time with him again. It's such a deep hole you are falling in.

- She's spacing out again, - after staring in horror into nowhere, you hear the woman speaking and shake your head immediately, - I will just leave you here the next time you won't notice everyone is gone. Okay?

Everyone is gone.

You didn't notice.

You can hear the mechanisms in your head start to work and you proceed what she says.

- What happened?

- Oppa asked to stop the rehearsal because of some issues with one of his variety recordings. He didn't have time to say goodbye, - she says it while making her way to turn off everything and put all the chaos of chairs on their places, - So go home, sleep and cheer up finally. You look like a ghost, - she smiles, so you won't feel offended again. She always does it and somehow, you are quite used to it, - But you did amazing today. Great job.

- Thank you, I guess, - you bow a little, grabbing your things and.. do what she says. Go home, sleep and try to cheer up.

And so the next thing you know you are at that party. Not really a thing to be cheered up by, but why not? Picking a dress, doing makeup and all that; it did make your mind a little bit more clear.

But what you didn't expect (apart from terrible weather with a heavy non stopping rain) is that everything was just as he said.. too glamorous. Everything was shining with exaggerated, awkward and, to be honest, kinda cringe luxury.

You look around, place your 'present' (which is technically just a bottle of champagne) on one of the tables and go your own way right to the bar; you didn't do all that perfectly looking make up to be sober all the evening, right? And that not less perfect dress must also not be forgotten.

Ignoring the loud music, you ask a bartender for a drink and look around again, trying to find someone you want to stick to, but who you did found is.. oh God. You turn away immediately, rolling you eyes after seeing you ex trying to cosplay a rich bad boy with an annoying smug look on his face which made you shiver uncomfortably. How did that even happen that you end up together? Maybe he really did buy you then? That's sound more and more as a reasonable possibility.

- Alone but not lonely, as usual, right? - you feel a hand sliding on your back slowly and almost throw a glass of wine at him.

- Yeah, - making tight fast smile, you take his hand off you and turn around.

- Look, I am not angry at you, so.. can we talk? - you try to not to make your face go 'what the fuck' too much. But you fail, obviously.

- Absolutely not. Let me go, - trying to go past him, he traps you with both of his arms and leans closer. You might have found it hot if you didn't wanted to smack him, - Let m..

Feeling his lips on yours makes you mind blow but not with the emotion he planned, apparently. Because you bet being bitten, then slapped and then doused with wine weren't exactly his plans. And judging by his face, your murder is now on the list.

His is on yours too.

- Don't ever go near me again.

You poke a finger at him, making a straight face and walk away as fast as possible, cursing yourself for putting on those heels.

- They are perfect with that dress, perfect, blah blah, - you mock yourself under your breath, stopping for a second to adjust your clothes because the main idea of strapless dress is that you don't run in it so it won't fall from you. Oh God.

You make a sip of your drink, exhaling slowly and shrug your shoulders. You will just hide till the end of the evening. Right? There are too many people, what could possibly happen?

- You came! Wow, - you hear another voice right above your ear and almost grunt when the hero of the occasion puts a hand around your waist. Is invading your space is a thing today? It's really not the time.

You jerk off in a rather rude way for now, tightly smiling at him. God, he is so waisted.

- Yeah, congratulations. Sorry that I didn't said that.. - he looks at you in a way that made you understand one thing: he doesn't give a fuck about said occasion, - Nevermind.

- Come, sit with us? C'mon, - you have no idea who those 'us' are and you even decline his invitation but when you see Sungha making his way to you two, you put on the most sweet smile you possibly can and move in the direction you were invited to, somehow dragging barely moving birthday..guy with you.

And the next few hours flew away like nothing happened; you drunk a little, danced too much and even made a few more friends because not everybody in that club are assholes and then you drunk a lot to celebrate that fact as well. It turned out to be a great evening, after all.

And in general, all the people you were hanging out with today, were nice. You haven't seen them till today and it felt like you were friends since childhood. But maybe it's alcohol, of course, we don't deny that.

You are coming back from restroom when you meet a guy whom you got to know about an hour earlier but for some reason it felt like you've been knowing him since forever. And even his touch wasn't so.. unwanted. You smile at him, taking a drink from his hand and feel like alcohol, again, makes you do so many wrong things.

You know that whenever you are drunk, It's.. different. Like, it obviously is, for everyone, it's natural; but for you it's more.. free. A lot more carefree and light.

And that's why you happily take his hand, letting him guide you to the room your company was sitting in. It doesn't feel right but not wrong either; somehow, It's enough for you now.

Yet the way you know what you are capable of when drunk, you know what you are not capable of. When drunk.

And when something just feels off, you try to stand up only to be brought back by a pair of arms on your tights, sitting you on the guy's you were sitting with laps.

The giant red sing screams a giant red 'f u c k' in your head, but you barely able to think straight.

Trying to push a body you are sitting on, you hear a loud laughter from him, but it feels like it comes from everywhere at once and you whine, gripping the collar of his shirt.

- Where are going? Calm down, - his voice sounds as.. desperation. For you. You have no idea how it truly sounds.

It feels like you are falling and everything around you becomes one giant feeling. You can't think or do anything, just helplessly watch how your surroundings turn surprisingly neon and not surprisingly blurry.

And right before you were ready to give up (it's not like it was your own decision, just.. decision that came out of nowhere to stay in your head as the only one possible), you see, as in slow motion, how a plate from a table slams right in the face of a guy who tries to kiss you.

It was weak, but there was enough hot sauce to make him scream and push you off. Apparently, your body know better. And it's not like it needed a push to run away (which felt like eternity and for now you are almost sure the laughter indeed comes from everywhere).

At that moment, you didn't wonder as to why nobody helped you or why people let it happen. They didn't and it happened. It was not a part of your thoughts when you were throwing up in the toilet.

You learned your lesson today.

When you feel like there is nothing else that can be pushed out of your body in that way, you stand up, feeling your knees tremble and feel like the whole situation crushes at you at once.

Surpassing a loud cry is so hard you physically can feel it choking your throat that already hurts from what you did earlier. You will not cry, God knows it's not the right time.

Now you need to be calm, because your body starts to mess up with you and your mind is on it's way to black out in any minute.

You are so afraid.

There is no place for fear, but it's there and it's not going to wash away easily. Your teeth clench wildly and you can't unzip a bag on your waist with the first try. Not with the second too. And when you do, it's even harder to press icons so you just go with one of the emergency calls and by deciding to not to make your mother have a heart attack, you dial Sungha.

- I need your h.. - your voice sound so drunk. It's so hard to speak, but you understand everything while trying to ignore how your thoughts are running wild.

- Isn't it too much to ask? - he sounds annoying but you are so lost to the point you forget why you were calling. You keep silent and he speaks up again, - What is it?

- I.. - you think, looking around and than nod, trying to make your brain work faster, - Take me out of here, please, - there is no pride or any of that shit; you know you won't be able to reach an exit alone. You are too afraid to leave restroom on your own anyway.

- Am I a taxi? - you hear a whine escaping your lips and try you hardest to not to fall for it. You know that the moment yoh start to cry, it's over.

- Please, I beg you, I.. I really can't, - you are mumbling, slowly going down on a cold floor and reaching it with a loud thud because your legs give up.

- I remember you said to never go near you again. Call a taxi, I don't know, - he hangs up before you can answer and you bite your lip, feeling how pain from a hard bite made your mind run faster.

It doesn't matter. Nothing matters.

You call the next number automatically without thinking about it and you don't know how much you've been waiting before you heard surprised 'yeah?' at the other end.

- Can you drive me home? - it's not like you 'hope' for a positive answer nor you 'want' it or something. You need it. You know your voice sounds desperate, drunk and barely audible. Just the way your mind is right now; just the way your body is.

You put the last hope on him.

I hate descriptions. Just read.

characters: eun jiwon/you;

warnings: alcohol usage, swearing.

- And so I was all in the cake and he was laughing like crazy and..I don't know, it's funny, I get it, but it was my fucking birthday and I had nothing to change to and, - rumbling, you feel your head spin a little after two bottles of soju that you two finished, - That dress was so expensive. I gave half of my allowance for it. And that asshole.. woah, now I hate him even more.

Sighing, you frown and pout, looking at your glass. Yeah, you do. Alcohol apparently did boost your eyes to finally open up. You look at Jiwon who's sitting in front of you in this night cafe in the middle of the street and he tries his best to hide his laughter.

- Oh, go on, laugh! - you pour another two glasses of soju and Jiwon smiles, getting his portion from your hand. He already told to stop with all those polite ways of drinking and this is one of the million things that you are thankful for, - Those problems must sound silly for you.

You've been nagging him about how terrible Sungha is for half an hour and he still is listening politely, not to mention his laughter from time to time and that soft look which sometimes your mom gives you when she doesn't want to call you an idiot even if she clearly thinks so, but anyway. He's not even slightly drunk, though. Deep inside you understand why he is not drinking so much.

To keep you safe.

- Yes, they are, - you pretend to be offended by the simple answer and he leans on the table, drinking alcohol like it's water; so you do the same, shoving spicy tteokbokki into your mouth like crazy right after, - But I understand that they are not stupid for you so I have no rights to offend you by saying that 'you are too young your problem are miserable' and all that shit. I was young once too with the same problems.

You are truly taken aback. He's clearly the best 40 years old person you have ever talked to. Idealising him is the worst idea, but that's exactly what you are doing right now.

It's hard to not to after all that happened today; your relationship and work is a mess, but here you are, being absolutely relaxed and comfortable. He did bare minimum; but it is so enough.

- That's the best you could have ever said. Thank you, - he bows down his head to his arms, laughing silently and his shoulder are shaking. Did you just make him giggle like a teenager? God, that feels the best, - So you really did has same troubles? Were you a troublemaker back then?

Jiwon raises his head up, opening a new bottle of soju and you laugh at his 'hell yeah I was' expression.

- Before I speak we should drink at least half of this one, - he pours your glasses again and you drink, feeling your throat burn slightly. You had plans on getting drunk, you are on your way.

- I'm not going to run away, - trying to reassure him, you smile and you find him so damn handsome. You blame it on the alcohol, but you know that's a lie.

He is. Damn, he so is. In the dim lights of the night restaurant, his sparkling because of alcohol and small smile eyes; fuck, you can scream about the color of his goddamn eyes. You just don't want to go all romantic force on how you lost in it, but just to make it clear: you do. Helplessly lost.

And the way he licks his lips sometimes; you are trying desperately to ignore it. You really do. But you would do anything if it means that his tongue would be on your skin right now. Wherever he wants.

You blink, waking up from that little trip that you never wanted to experience and pretend like you didn't imagine blowing him off under that exact table. No big deal.

- I was wild, when I was at your age. That's even sound.. oh my, - he brushes his face with both hands and you finally realise what is he's so afraid of, - I did everything to fuck up my relationships with family and, sometimes, society. Felt edgy or something. I pay for it till this days and it's been almost 20 years. Sounds dramatically.. scary.

- Absolutely not, - why do you feel offended? The feeling that you should protect him from himself suddenly arose and you have no idea how to fight that, - I.. you are not old!

You mumble, not being able to contain your drunken thoughts and breath heavily.

- I am, - he smiles at you with such a soft look in his eyes. God. He could be sixty and you would still find him the best, - Don't fight me on that, you know it's true.

He sounds really cheerful but at the same time you can't deny how sad he actually is. It's heartbreaking to see a man who's worth thousands, feel himself like shit about goddamn age. Maybe you don't understand, you are young and blah blah. Maybe he will think that you don't understand; fuck him then. You understand everything, but alcohol in your blood mixed with slow realisation of break up going on at the back of your mind and anger at him for saying that messes up pretty much everything you were going to say.

- You are an idiot, - he stops in the midst of pouring you another glass and looks at you with such mixed emotions you can't even separate them. He looks adorable, waiting for a continuation of your thought with pure interest and faked offend and you decide to make him even more confused, because that's how we live, - What? Will you punish me? Was I a bad girl?

You make the purest and cutest face you could manage and bite you lower lip. Before he can contain himself, you totally saw him gulping and gazing at your lips. You saw and you blame wave of warmness spreading in your body on alcohol and not on the thought of him kissing you. Or punishing. Or.. Whatever.

- What th..

- My point is, you can count yourself, as old, how much you want, but for me, it will not change the fact that you are still absolutely able to get it, - you were not expecting to say something like that but for someone who wasn't ready, you spoke way too confidently.

- I didn't say I am not able to get it, - his gaze is so intense all of a sudden and you badly want to kiss that smirk off his face. And considering the amount of glasses you have drunk, you might actually able to try, - I was talking about different things.

You are so annoyed! He looks so pleased with himself you don't want him to look like that.

No, you want. He made you frustrated and he didn't even touch you.

Jiwon looks like a total asshole with his shiteating grin, leaning comfortably in a goddamn plastic chair, making it obvious that he checks you out. An asshole you would happily let ruin you in so many ways.

You don't want him to look so attractive because he's dangerous like that. What you said earlier, is true. He is so able to get it. Anything he wants.

It's alcohol speaking in your mind. Probably. Hopefully. G o d, hopefully.

- Are going to stare at me till the night is over? - yes, you were staring. So what? Huh? What? Oh God, you are done.

- Do you want me to do something else? - the game is for two players, right? You take off one of your slippers under the table, not even thinking about how right or wrong it will be. You are drunk, just broke with a dickhead and.. why not? Jiwon's face changes instantly when you touch his leg with yours, slowly and gently getting higher. You lick your lips, biting on the lower one, looking him directly in the eyes and you can swear you have never felt more desired. He just sits there, doing nothing and you can see everything in his eyes. Every fucking thing he wants to do.

It doesn't take much time before you feel his hand sliding smoothly up your ankle and maybe it's because alcohol (you blame way too much on alcohol today) in your veins busted your senses to the max, but you feel such a need for him just because of the one touch. His touches are light, but you can feel how firm and warm his hand is. Fuck. If underessing with a stare would be possible, you sure he won't be even bothered by taking your panties off to not waste time. God, you don't mind.

The only time he breaks eye contact is when he stares at your parted lips, slowly licking his and how he bites it when you push your leg along his thigh. The urge to kiss him is so strong. You met his eyes again and the moment he caress your knee with his fingers, you can't contain yourself and soft whine that escapes your lips ruin it all.

You broke the moment.

Jiwon shrugs and lets you go, muttering something you can't hear.

You would be begging him to continue, but the look on his face.. It's the first time you get rejected but care about the other person instead of your pride.

He closes his eyes and takes his phone with a loud exhale.

- It's so late. I'll call you a taxi, - Jiwon doesn't look at you, taking a wallet and heads towards the cassier.

The game is for two players and everyone lost. You wanted nothing more than come home, bury your head in pillow and cry the whole day away. What were you hoping for? Spend that one night together just because he was generous enough to take care of you through the whole day? You start to think that if he will think a whore who sleeps with men for money out of you, he won't be wrong. It all was so wrong.

You were so ashamed. Like crazy, you felt your cheeks burning, the heat spreading everywhere on your face. God.. it was the worst thing ever.

- Hey, I.. - you hear his voice again and you feel how it literally got worse. It's not healthy, you are afraid to even look at him.

- It's okay. I understand everything. I'm truly sorry for what I did, - you stand in front of him, trying to avoid his eyes and the atmosphere changes so suddenly. A moments ago you felt the best in weeks and now it's.. The lowest, honestly. The deep end.

- You didn't do anything wrong. I shouldn't have drink that much. I am sorry, - you look at him and you can bet his mood is the same. He looks so down. Yet Jiwon sounds so sincere. And sad. And maybe you understand clearly now what he meant earlier about his age.

Responsibilities. He has so many of them.

The thing is, you are absolutely, one hundred percent sure about what he was thinking when you touched him. God, a few moments more and bet it wouldn't end like that. You are not blind.

But the decision he made was like a pretty much a fair slap for you to quit with it. Not because he didn't like you or what you were doing; but because he knew it won't be right.

Even now, he doesn't make you feel uncomfortable, taking the blame on himself.

- It's natural. We both are drunk. You are not the only one who got carried away, - he avoids eye contact, grabbing his phones from the table and you stand up, feeling way more sober now. Jiwon heads to the exit and you follow him, saying goodbye to the waiter.

The cool of the night feels amazing and you inhale deeply, trying to clear your thoughts. Jiwon stands near you, staring into nowhere and you have no idea how you survived this day. It was such a mess. And it still is.

- Aren't you going with me or..? - he left a car in front of YG and you get here by taxi. It's not like he could drive anyway. And you don't want to stand in silence. Even though it's not awkward, as you expected it to be. Just.. tough.

- I live not so far from here. Will walk there, I need to think anyway, - Jiwon smiles at you, putting his hands in pockets and you nod, returning a smile.

- Thank you for the evening. It was great, I enjoyed it anyway. I would cry the whole time if not you, - he looks at you, pouting a little and you want to squish his cheeks. Bad idea.

- Nah, it's okay. I had fun too, - now Jiwon smiles a lot more natural and you are so happy about it.

A car stops in front of you two and he opens a door, waiting for you to sit. You stop standing next to him, trying to find the right words for what you are about to say.

- About earlier.. I'm sorry if it was offensive. I truly am. I haven't thought before doing. I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable, - he looks you dead in the eyes, gripping on a door and you are afraid you made it worse. As usual.

- Stop with it. I wasn't uncomfortable or offended, - he stops for a second, sigh heavily looking elsewhere, - And that's the main problem. Sleep tight.

He walks away just like that and you.. you can't stop him anyway.

For you, this evening was a great way to sort out many things. That you don't care about Sungha, as a boyfriend, and that the one you loved in him was gone a long time ago, you just didn't want to admit it. You care more about what people might think of you and that's the biggest problem of it all. The bigger might be only the fact that you start to feel things to someone, who's not even slightly will give you a chance. Today, he made it as clear as day. And somehow it makes you feel so miserable. And you planned on crying in your pillow anyway, right?

in which Jiwon sees something that reminds him of you while playing and casual evening turns into casual 'something more'.

characters: you/eun jiwon;

warnings: nsfw, swearing.

You were peacefully chilling in your bed, watching some movie and nothing was about to happen. You thought.

Jiwon, who was playing in the other room, now approaches you while taking off his hoodie and smiles way too mischievously for your liking.

- What? - he doesn't answer, Jiwon takes off his tshirt as well, crawling on the bed and smiles at the panic in your eyes, - What?

You pull covers securely on top of you only for your head to popped out and shake your head as he tries to kiss you.

It's clear what he wants.

He pushes a laptop to the side and leans down to you completely, pecking your lips shortly.

- We'll make it quick. I have a break from a game and I really, - he smiles, settling his tone lower and places another kiss on your lips, - Really, - Jiwon proceeds to kiss you, stressing out every word and you melt. As usual. There is no way you could win him, - Want you. C'mon.

He tries to pull your cover again but you don't give up.

The wait, the teasing and his irritation; it's all worth it the end.

- Please, - he whines, pouting a little and you almost give up again, chuckling. He owns your heart and his cute pout has the first place, - I don't have much time, baby, please.

He doesn't give up on trying to 'undress' you from your shelter but you are willing to make him suffer just a little.

- What will I get from it? Will you order some food? I'm hungry, - now it's your term to try to be cute and he nods right away, sighing impatiently.

- Whatever you want, just let's do it already, - he leans forward from his sitting position again and you escape his kiss at the last moment, hearing a loud groan from him.

If you giggle now, he will, probably, will make this session as long as you would need to beg him to cum.

You don't want that.

- I want something sweet as well. Maybe cheesecake? Will you buy me one? - you look at him, still gripping covers hard as steel and smile just enough to annoy him.

The thing is that he knows that if he would make you displeased, he would need to go and continue his imaginary pervert thoughts all by himself. Jiwon never made you do anything if you don't want it.

That what made this 'game' possible.

- I will buy you a thousand, just please, cooperate, - he still tries to make his way under your blanket and you make a face as if you are thinking. Of course you don't need to think; he probably can get it any time he wants.

- For real? And coffee? - you look at him, smiling at the way he frowns and looks with that famous 'are you fucking kidding me' expression, - And what if I be cold? It's warm under a blanket..

- You.. - you laugh and see how his lips twitch as if he wants to smile too, but he's too busy with poking his finger at your face.

- Okay, it's a deal, - you push yourself up and shiver when the cold air of the room hits your almost naked heated body.

He pulls you closer immediately and you make yourself comfortable on his knees, pressing yourself to his half hard length.

- What were you thinking out there? - you murmur into his lips between a hectic kiss and he slides his hands up your body to get rid of his loose tshirt, smiling.

- While I was waiting for some thing, I was scrolling through SNS and saw some.. uhm, - he almost blushes, kissing down your neck slowly and you feel your breath hitching and that familiar, warm tickling sensation in your belly build up, - And saw a cut from some adult movie I used to watch as a teenager and then I thought about you and your body and..

You giggle, brushing his hair gently as he bites on your collarbone lightly, going down to play with you nipples and you hiss, not suppressing a satisfied small moan.

- Did you rea.. - you roll your eyes when he sucks in one of them, gently pinching other and grip his hair a bit stronger, - Did you really got turned on by an old porn cut?

He pokes his head up and nods, hugging your waist securely and pushing on the bed.

- I don't know, - he pecks your lips again, starting to go down one more time, - I got really excited knowing that I can do that to you while my game updates.

You chuckle, rolling your eyes at his a bit childish thought, but you do truly understand what he means. Sometimes you also get caught up with it; even without help of any porn.

You help him to get rid of the last piece of cloth you have on and he pulls down his pants just enough to free himself.

Fuck, you almost moan at the view. There was no proper prelude or anything but you feel your head dizzy and throw it back, biting on your lip while Jiwon teases your entrance with hot and wet tip of his member. You can almost hear how harsh his breath is and you roll your hips forward, receiving a light chuckle.

- So impatient, - you push yourself up on your elbows in a need to kiss him as aggressively as you can and see how he smirks, supporting your neck with one hand and spitting on another, lubricating your skin and you moan when he teases your clit with his wet long fingers.

- You said you'd make it qui--, - Jiwon pushes himself in and you choke on your words as he does it, still gripping the back of your neck so you wont fall on the bed.

You could never get tired of his faces in those moments; as he slides in, biting his lower lip and his eyelids flatter when he closes his eyes in pleasure of feeling you. And the way he fills you up, stretching you just enough to make you lose your mind every time he starts moving slowly.

He thrusts into you steadily, letting you both enjoy the presence of each other. You both were together at so many situations by now, but nothing can compared with.. this. You could never be any more close to him; and you both love every second of it.

Jiwon leans forwards, letting you both fall on the bed and you moan at the new angle, gripping now into dark skin on his broad shoulders as he continuously pounds his hips into you, breathing hot air in your neck.

As he turns his head to kiss you, you place a hand on his lips which he kisses immediately, making you smile.

- Is there something special I need to do though? So that pervert teenager in you would be satisfied? - you tease him and see his eyes crinkle in a smile as he almost stops his movements, staying buried deep inside you.

- What haven't you done already? - it doesn't make you blush as he surely wanted to and when you wake up from an amazing feeling of his length deep inside you, you push his shoulders, making him turn on his back.

Jiwon hisses when he slips out, caressing your waist with his hands when you straddle him.

- It was probably that old boring porn when a man fucks a woman in one position for half an hour and no one cums? - you lean to his face, placing your finger on his lower lip, guiding it down slowly and position him between your folds, pushing your hips slowly into it till he fills you up again. Feels incredible. You meowl, biting his lip and feel your toes curl when he brushes that perfect spot, moving slowly.

- Do you prefer me bending you over a kitchen table and fucking you till you scream out my name? That's how you like it? - he almost breathes it out into your lips, looking at you with those serious dark hooded eyes.

You, actually, do.

But when he lets you be in charge, he doesn't need to be aware of that. So you push yourself up, rocking your hips on his and he secures your hips, helping your movements. You place your palms on his chest to support yourself and it's just.. so good.

You try to move your hips in another angle and see Jiwon smiling at the way you are so caught up in pleasing yourself. He murmurs low 'good girl', playing with your clit while you feel as the world slips out everywhere and you move faster, feeling him twitching inside you as you squeeze his length harder as you cum. You moan his name, moving slowly up and down, not being able to stop the warming pleasure he gives you.

You make him slip out just when Jiwon is about to cum and receive an actual unsatisfied groan from him and he sits up immediately, capturing your waist with his arms. His grip can be steel when he wants to.

- I don't want to make a mess, - you whisper it into his lips, gently caressing his sweaty hot skin and you feel how his member twitches being pressed between your bodies.

He sighs, licking his lips and pushes you back just a enough for him to stroke himself.

You saw him doing that; but the sight of his fist pumping his swollen veiny lenght would always make you lose your mind.

It brings you on your knees in seconds and you open your mouth in front of the dripping wet tip, looking up at Jiwon. He frowns, squeezing his eyes shut and throws his head back as he looks down at you. You smirk, knowing damn well what you do to him when he starts moving his hand quicker and cums on your tongue the moment his tip touches your lower lip. You hear him slipping out a low moan as he continues to pump himself till he's finished.

You swallow everything, licking your lips when you look at him recovering from his orgasm and he reaches his hand to pull you up for a deep, slow and sensual kiss.

His kisses always make your head spin; even after mind blowing orgasms.

- Perverted teenager in me celebrates, - he jokes and you roll your eyes, smirking and pushing his chest a bit, - Thank you for cooperation.

Jiwon is an absolute ass sometimes and it makes your heart flatter the most.

Because he's also so sweet. He pecks your lips gently, adjusts his pants while grabbing his tshirt to help you put it on and lays you down on the bed, kissing your forehead.

You know he loves you; it's in the way he tucks fluffy blanket all around your body and puts your laptop back onto it's place.

in which you are his fans who meets him on a blind date by accident.

characters: you/eun jiwon;

warning: nsfw, swearin.

You really didn't want to go on that date. With all that LiFe happening around you and the fact that you need to make it through, relationship were at the deep end of your 'to do list' for now. But your mom was really persuasive. As always though.

So here you are, in front of the small restaurant, holding your breath before entering.

She did arrange you some dates before but none of them were placed in places like this one; too luxury for your purse.

When the doorbell rings gently as you enter, you hear immediate welcoming by the staff and the smile, bowing politely. And while they ask a name of a reservation and guide you there, you just admire sophistication in minimalistic design of interior. Because if you wouldn't, you might start to think of who's waiting for you and.. setting your hopes too high is always a bad thing.

The last blind date went completely wrong and so you have chosen to just let it all go with a flow.

That's why you weren't even slightly angry when he was late for almost 15 minutes. You just asked a waiter for a menu and ordered right away; why would you follow the rules of etiquette if he doesn't. Right?

And right when you were sipping on a glass of water, you heard the door into the private room you were sitting in, open. And you look up while he was apologizing for being late, blaming it on whatever it was.

You didn't hear that. Anything. You heard your heart making a loud thud in your chest and your sure heard harsh gulp of yours when he looked at you.

God you beg you weren't crying automatically.

- It's fine, - you manage to squeak out, placing the glass on the table with a shaky hand, - It's perfectly fine.

You felt yourself like that meme where a dog is sitting in a room which is on fire, smiling.

It is a perfect representation of you now.

For how long have you been his fan? You don't remember.

It's like a fanfiction you are in.

- So my name is Eun Jiwon. It's really nice to meet you, - he holds out his hand for you and you have no idea how to hold him because your palms are sweating and you are on the verge of knock down.

- Uhm, me too, - you mumble your name, ignoring his hand when just arrived waiter comes in, placing two glasses of wine on the table, starting filling them with red wine.

Jiwon seems to be a bit.. bothered. You don't want to look him; it's not like you don't want to, you can't. And he's too polite to call you out.

The moment waiter finishes pouring liquid in your glass, you drink it all the way, like a shot of vodka (for a record, you wouldn't mind a shot of something stronger now) and look at Jiwon's puzzled yet still friendly expression.

- Feeling better? - his joking tone tells you that he knows. You see it in his small smirk when hr leans on his seat, scanning you with his eyes.

He's so gorgeous.

You inhale deeply, pouting your lips and look at him, deciding to just give up. You meet his eyes and he smiles gently, lifting his eyebrows and you suppress a squeak because that was the cutest shit he can do.

There is no way you can act natural in front of a man who's pictures are the biggest part of your phone memory.

- Look, it won't go well, - you clap your hands almost silently, nodding to yourself and start to look for your purse, - I really didn't know who you are. I mean, don't think I'm one of those crazy ass fans who stalk you and would do something like this, I really, really, rea--

You speak fast and nervous and stand up, taking your things getting ready to just run away when he stands in front of you, placing his hand on your upper arm so gently; you barely feel it.

- I know that you didn't mean it. My mom asked me to come, she wouldn't let her precious 'one time a year special offer' turn into a fanmeeting intentionally, - you don't know if he jokes or not, but it gives you time to clear your mind just a bit, - So it's alright. Okay?

- Oh, it's not. If I faint, it would your problem, not her, you know, - you look at him and he has that shy boyish smile on his face which.. you can really faint.

- I'll deal with it if it happens.

And you really stay. You stay to continue, genuinely, the best date of your life. It's nothing special, but he made it so interesting to be with him. You saw Jiwon through almost every programme that he's on; hours and hours spent on watching him been nothing compared to actually talking to him. He's intelligent, funny and a bit dumb.

He made your heart his as easily as he did from the screen.

Yet he never actually made a move on you; he didn't flirt with you. In any way. It was actually looking like an 'extra exclusive closed blahblah VIP fanmeeting' kind of thing.

You.. hated it?

- How often do your date turn into something like this? - you sip on wine again, feeling your head being a bit lighter than usual.

- The first time, actually, - he sips on his and you look at him in disbelief.

- For real? You are handling a fan pretty well for a first time, - maybe your sentence was a bit two sided or maybe something clicked but you almost sure you saw his face changing into something more.. deep.

The seconds that passed after were like in a slow motion; like he was seriously thinking about something.

- Do you want to have a dance? - your breath hitches when he asks, because you know that there it is. Flirting.

- I was waiting the whole time, - you smile, answering in the same manner; you know he got the hint. He's smart enough to catch it.

Jiwon stands up, holding a hand for you and as you press your body to his, he starts to move slightly in the rhythm of subtle slow melody that plays quietly.

You put your hands on his shoulders, trying to not to scream but it's surprisingly a lot better now. As if he made you think of him as if he was just a man; a perfect fucking man, goddamn him. Jiwon traces one of your hands with his fingertips, taking your palm in his and squeeze it gently, pulling your closer with a hand on your waist.

- You know, I even know the name of your perfume, - you press your forehead to his shoulder, hugging him tighter. Because it sounds way weirder than you thought and he chuckles, looking aside and shrugs his shoulders, - You smell amazing.

He does. It's so good you almost drown. His hands are so soft yet firm you lose your mind everytime you remember all the dirty fantasies you had about them. About him.

- You too, - hardly audible moan escapes your lips when you feel him pressing his lips to your ear, whispering an answer. But he heard it. And it was enough invitation for him to start placing hot kisses down your neck.

Closing your eyes at the feeling, you give him more access and grip the material of his shirt to hold on at least something because your sanity goes to hell when he bites on your earlobe, squeezing your ass at the same time.

You squirm impatiently, biting your lip when he looks at you with a gaze you could never even imagine.

It's not like you could have imagined any of these.

You see his glance flicking to your lips shortly and his eyebrows raising in a silent question.

You want to. Desperately. All the times you were looking at him; thinking about him; maybe even.. more than thinking. You weren't some kind of a creepy sasaeng or delusional fan, knowing that your affection is absolutely hopeless and more like a distraction from hardships of life; but now. Now, when it's as real as it is, you didn't know what to do.

But you want to. Desperately. When he gently rubs the skin on the back of your neck with his unholy fingers, his hitching breath and hooded eyes, locked on yours.

Is that even possible to say no?

You kiss him first, pressing lips to his lightly, closing your eyes to not to feel this kneel dropping embarrassment creeping out everywhere; you are almost shaking in his arms when he kisses you back, moving his lips slowly.

The kiss intensifies and when he licks your lower lip as an ask to deepen it, you grip his shirt and legit moan, making Jiwon smile.

You dreamed of him kissing you like a fucking god of kissing, but in reality? You swear you held your breath throughout the whole time.

- Do you want to finish your dessert? - Jiwon has such a smug grin on his you feel an urge to slap him; but it's impossible when your mind doesn't want to process anything and you just nod, making him lose his confidence for a brief moment, - Wh-

- I mean 'no', - you shake your head, groaning a little, - What the fuck? What dessert are you talking about? Jiwon-ssi, do I really need to tell you what to do?

You look at him with a fake seriousness and he shrugs his shoulders again, squeezing his hand on your neck gently, massaging your muscles which.. which makes you hopeless in his arms again.

- How far do you want to go?

Apparently, as far as his bed, at least. Because you don't know how many time have passed but now you stand in front of him sitting at the edge of a mattress, caressing your inner tights slowly.

You put one knee between his legs, touching already visible hard boner and peel of the buttons on his shirt slowly, pushing it off his shoulders, never breaking eye contact. Jiwon smiles, guiding his hand further up, pushing your dress higher and you feel how anticipation washes over your body when he slowly tugs your panties down. You push it off your ankles and he presses his thumb to your wet core, circling clit in slow motion while you almost hang on his shoulders, moaning silently when he stops.

- Come here, - he pushes your legs closer to him and you straddle his laps, feeling how hard he actually is. Jiwon is so calm, even his actions are so.. nonchalant. Like he ain't makes you come without any touch. But the look he gives you is so deep, dark and oh fucking God so dominant. You push your hips further into his and he rewards you with a satisfied smile, gripping your asscheek with one hand, - Just like that, good.

You know what he wants you to do and honestly, you don't need to be asked twice. Creating slow speed, you grip his shoulders again and push your head backwards, feeling hid lips on your skin instantly. The rough material of his jeans rubs you perfectly when you find a perfect angle, biting your lips to suppress moans.

It's not a shame to come that fast but even the thought of the fact that you are grinding on Eun Jiwon's hard as a fucking stone boner, makes you lose it.

His barely audible groans in your neck or the way he grips your hips, making you go faster and harder on him. You feel harsh slap on your ass, screaming out of subtle pain and such a strong desire for him.

- Come for me like a good little girl you are, - he breathes it into your ear, burning your skin from a contact and slaps you again, gripping your ass with his palm to push you closer, making you go faster. Feeling how everything clutches inside and you lose your breath suddenly when everything stops and you finish, half moaning half whining at the feeling, shutting your eyes tight as he murmurs low ''good" into your neck, placing kisses all over it, - Look at me.

You still can't manage your breath but you do and Jiwon smiles, pushing your hair off your face and now you kiss him, because.. he's irresistible. You blame it all on hormones and burning euphoria in your body, but it's just him. As simple as that.

Never breaking the kiss, only for a short moment to get rid of your dress, you hug him tighter and Jiwon stands up to lay you down on the bed and crawl on top, giving the best fucking French kiss you have ever experienced. While taking his pants off.

You push him off a little to catch a breath and he chuckles so annoyingly confident you want to slap him again. Or, you want him to slap you again. Haven't decide yet.

He unhooks your bra in meanwhile, cupping your breasts with his hands and squeezes nipples gently, playing with sensitive skin, making you roll your eyes again. Jiwon throws at a fucking deepend of all your feeling combined. And when you see his face.. he loves it.

- Did you have your little rest, babygirl? - he's whispering to your ear, brushing a hot tip of his length against your still oversensetive after orgasm skin and you want him inside so bad. Hard, hot and big; stretching you out so deliciously as you moan beneath him.. it seems like all your thoughts were running on your face because Jiwon pinches your nipple lightly and you hiss, looking at him almost angrily, - Did you?

He almost growls that at you and you nod instantly, arching your back into his torso, pressing your body to his hot skin as he bites on your collarbone, squeezing your ass to keep you in place.

- I did, - you don't recognize your voice, because you legit never sounded so needy and whiny so you decide to use it just a little more, - Oppa, please, I really want yo..

You hear his groan and he doesn't let you finish, making your unfinished wish come true instantly. Jiwon pushes himself inside of you and you see how his face changes into blissful expression as you squeeze him, clenching around him as he stops for a moment, buried deep inside your wetness.

He leans closer to your face, kissing your rapidly and stars moving, building up steady rhythm which makes you think that this round would be even shorter for you.

He feels amazing right from the beginning; the way he brushes that perfect spot everytime and circles your clit with his finger, making your toes curl; you scratch his back and it's his turn to hiss through greeted teeth. You fucking love the way he thrust in a full force into you, swallowing your moans in a heated kiss and still able to brush your hair off your face, petting your hair gently.

You grip his hair with one hand, fisting soft locks and he goes faster again, getting the hint as you feel how close you are; it takes him a few more thrusts to make you moan uncontrollably as you feel like everything in your body stops in anticipated tension to release it all a few moments after.

You are still high from your relief when you realise you just can't take him anymore; and you know exactly what to do about it.

- Oppa, - he snaps his eyes at you, pecking your lips as he chases his orgasm and he does that short 'uhm?', making your heart skip a bit, - Do you want me to blow you off and swallow every drop like a, - you stop, purring it right into his lips as he slows down, genuinely interested in your offer and you peck his lips gently after every word that escapes your lips, - Good little girl I am?

You lick your lips, watching how he traces that move with his gaze and smirks, kissing your again while sliding off you, making you whine at the feeling.

Jiwon leans back, sitting on his knees and you get on your fourth in front of him as he picks your hair into a messy ponytail, placing his other hand on your nape.

You love the sight. His veiny hard red length is dripping with wetness and he's twitching when you lick your lips, looking Jiwon in the eyes with a small smile.

You never wanted to suck a dick this bad.

Giving him a long stripe along the length, feeling every popping out vein with your tongue, you earn a loud moan and a thrust of his hips. It's not like you want to torture him; taking him in, you swallow him deeper instantly and he moans a loud "fuck". You might have smiled, if you weren't busy though.

Jiwon pushes your head deeper and you let him, relaxing muscles in your throat to let him all slide down easily. He lets you go and you give his head a gentle suck of your lips, massaging the little dim with your tongue and now his moans are a hot mess out of swears and loud long sounds which make you go crazy. You take him in again and he pushes his hips unconsciously, making you gag when he thrusts into your throat, letting go of you instantly and cough shortly, looking up at him.

- Relax, please, baby, relax it, - he's mumbling and you see how foggy and dark his eyes are as he fucking pleads you to let him fuck your mouth, - It's so good, I-

You could do anything for him, for God's sake.

You just didn't expect it.

Not letting him finish the sentence, you take him in again, letting him thrust inside your throat all he wants. Jiwon mixes praises and curses, moaning everytime you let out a bubbling sound when goes faster and you feel how his moves become erratic and get ready to taste him.

He comes hard, making you gag on him again as you try to swallow everything; spitting a bit of his cum on the tip, you suck him gently again which makes Jiwon almost shake, as you give him a few more long strokes with your palm before leaning back to lick your lips and brush off everything that was dripping down the corners of your lips. You demonstrate how you lick you thumb covered in his cum and Jiwon rolls his eyes, letting out a long sight, bringing you closer to his face with a hand on your neck to kiss you.

I hate descriptions. Just read.

characters: Eun Jiwon/'you'

warnings: swearing

A/U: i tried into drama making but since i hate drama it turned out kinda cringey so yeah enjoy and OH its long

And the next week was pretty much normal. Practices, meet ups with friends, helping your mother on her work and other typical stuff for you. You even managed to forget what happened with Jiwon earlier, because there were no time to think about it; too much is happening, and, as always, it does make you feel overwhelmed. And of course there was someone who was fascinated with the idea on how to make you life worse. Sungha didn't even try, you don't know if it was his intention; but God was he successful.

He got suddenly fucking annoying; to the point you didn't even want to see him. He asked annoying question, joked annoying jokes, touched you so annoyingly that you flinched from him everytime. Perhaps, he didn't do anything wrong (as he, himself, claims) and to be honest you are not that angry with his actions on that damned night, but.. something is wrong. You can only feel it, it's impossible to describe it or put it in words; and that's, actually, one of the main problems - you have no idea what to tell him.

And he continues to ask. Annoyingly.

You read and heard somewhere that a simple gesture of a person could easily turn you away from her or him. Apparently, that happened.

And Jiwon. Somehow you see him tragically different now. This week made you analyze so many things about him; you spent hella time together, it wasn't that hard anyway. It's not like you are ready to jump on him screaming 'oppa take me' or something. Absolutely fucking not. Yet.

Anyway, among everything, you drastically wanted to be closer to him. Friendship seems like out of this world idea, but just talking to him feels better than with anyone else. Except, maybe, your mother. But perhaps it's because they are around the same age? We (you and your common sense) choose to ignore that fact.

The other thing you want to ignore is that you are very much disappointed in the fact that he stopped being late. Just a tiny part of you were hoping for another 15 minutes spent together in total comfort of the night drive.

And today was not different; Eun Jiwon was tolerably late and all the dancers waited for him patiently.

- We need to talk, - Sungha sits down beside you and you fight an urge to roll your eyes.

- Right now? - you are annoyed without any apparent reason. It's not right. You really want to talk; you know it's a need. But at the same time it feels so impossible; you know that there would be a fight. You just want to postpone it for as long as possible.

- Yes, because any other time you run from me like crazy, - he has a point.

- I'm not, - we will not accept it anyway.

- You are! But.. not a point. What the fuck is happening? Are you still mad at me? For just one shitty night? You made it safe! - he's not screaming, more like loudly whispering but you still see people watching you. So you stand up, taking his hand and shove him out of the room, standing in front of him with your arms crossed on your chest.

Rage starts to build up unexpectedly fast and you have no idea how to stop it. You don't want to, to be honest.

- Yeah, I hope you had great time as well.

- I promised them! What could I say? 'Sorry, I need to abandon something that has been planned weeks ago'? - he has a point, he really does. Everytime. But.. you just can't think straight. Whatever he says, you would probably still blame him.

- It would have literally took you about 20 minutes. But no, you didn't even think about it; the idea that your friends can spend 30 minutes without you didn't cross your mind. But the idea of abandoning me in the middle of night - on top of all, - you articulate dramatically at this point, but who cares anyway.

- Oh, now we are playing that 'could have been done' game? C'mon, quit it, I care about you and you know it, - did it make you more angry? Because it did.

- You? Care? My ass, how many times you dropped me over some shit? Buying me stuff to make it seems like an apology is not caring about me, it's bullshit, - you put his hands that he already had on your waist down, stepping back a little.

- Uhm, it's not like I'm the one who accepts them, - it's a war declaration.

You know he is right. You know. But at the same time, who said you should always think with you brain, not, for example, with ass? It will sound stupid, but your heart already gave up on him (if it even was considering him in the first place), your head's ideas don't really suit you and other parts of you just really want to punch him.

- Oh you know what? It's better to receive at least something from you, because otherwise I might stuck with only "amazing" conversations and even worse sex. I'm not your parent to teach you how to behave when you are guilty and if you want to shower me with gifts when you can simply apologize, I'm not here to complain, - aww, who's that angry little boy? He furrows his brows, breathing heavily and you shrug your shoulders, smiling the most annoying smile you can manage.

Everyone think that you are with him because of money, so why not play along?

- Fuck that, - Sungha goes straight back to the practice room again and you feel air in your lungs hurting. If that's even possible. You have chosen him for a reason and the reason is absolutely not wealth. And now.. it's kinda weird to be sad over something that you, yourself, ruined. You did ruin it, right? And over some, indeed, tiny fucking mistake.

You will not blame yourself for this, but maybe you are allowed to be a little upset. Break ups happen and.. it's upsetting. And when the adrenaline in your veins finally calms down, you inhale deeply, trying to calm that tiny crybaby in you down.

The thing is, you absolutely can't handle it right now. Just not in the middle of this mess with everyday practices and hella tone of work in general. You want peace and comfort, not all those nerves.

It's absolutely time to get wasted. And you're have absolutely no time for that.

Coming back in, you feel particularly everyone in this room watching you and it's so fucking annoying again. Why can't they just mind their own business? Is it that hard?

But most probably the biggest problem is that right after you, a mere seconds later, Jiwon comes in and you can swear he heard everything. Everything. You groan and stomp your feet, screaming at how life hates you. Internally.

You meet his eyes once, when Jiwon greets everyone and he just smiles, nodding his head a little. Maybe he will not think of you as someone who sleeps with men for money.

Just a tiny, tiny, tiny possibility. A girl can dream, right?

Hope dies last. All that shit.

It's hard to concentrate when all you can think about is your now totally fucked up relationships; it's impossible to pretend that you don't care. You do. And not because you are scared of losing him (somehow that is the last thing you afraid of), but to break up on this conditions. You truly believe that everything can be solved through conversation (even though you are the one who became angry but does it really matter?); you won't beg him to start over, because you simply don't want to. But breaking up without hating each other sounds better than what you have now.

The practice starts and you do everything automatically. Absolutely on autopilot.

- Hey, are you with us? I'm talking to you, - of course it's time to miss main choreographer speaking directly to you, right in front of your face. What a perfect day!

- Sorry, I.. sorry, - the music is already silent and everyone are out. For a break, probably. You feel like you are on crack or something, because you totally forgot what was happening around. And how much time passed by.

- Nevermind. What I wanted to say is that you are to dance with Eun Jiwon. I hope you remember choreography for 'Tipsy', aren't you? - you badly want to close your eyes, breath and whisper 'what the fuck' but you just nod silently, then shake your head.

- But I was dancing with Sungha as backdancer, so I..

- Not anymore. I don't know what is happening between you two but this is the last time I agree on changing partners in the last moment. Understood? - again, the exact same wish. What the fuck is going on? It feels like you fell asleep in one reality and woke in another.

- Yeah. But I..

- That's it, go and grab some coffee, I don't know, you lookin awful, - she smiles in the end so you don't feel offended, but she's totally right. Nodding, you turn around to leave. Coffee. Great idea. Would be even better with whiskey.

Unsuccessfuly trying to persuade coffee machine to not to add 5 portions of sugar, you also trying your very best to persuade yourself to stop fucking whining.

- Yes, bad terms. Yes, I look like a bitch now. Yes, he's going to shit on me everywhere. Yes, probably I will lose some people. Yes, I said awful things, - talking to yourself in public place is not a great idea but who cares, - But do I need those people? And sex was really not that great.. Fuck you!

You tap with a loud sound on a coffee machine who proudly presents you extra sweet coffee. Feeling your lower lip tremble out of pure rage, you shove coffee in sink and sigh slowly.

- Please, just once, sweetie, let's do it, huh? Just for me, c'mon, - now you try to persuade the machine nicely. It works with you laptop every time, so why not?

But yeah, life is a shit and that's exactly why you hear a loud giggle from behind and.. we're not in fanfiction. It can't be him. Right?

- After talking to yourself you started to chat with coffee machine. I genuinely want to know, are you okay? - it's absolutely not the right time for Jiwon to show up out of nowhere. The awful timing. Closing your eyes, you force yourself to smile and turn around, facing him.

- Yeah, just.. it's always nice to chat with someone smart, - he smiles again, nodding and comes closer.

- That's why you were talking to coffee machine? - you look at him, standing right beside you with his kind mocking face and he smirks, celebrating his win. Hell no.

- That's why I will not talk to you, - his face changes in seconds and he's now cutely mad. You could never count him as scary old sunbae, because it's so light around him. You can't be this free with the most of the men around there because every one of them don't know how to handle pure jokes. Jiwon does everything perfectly.

- Okay then. I'll drink that tasty fresh black strong coffee with no sugar from cafe nearby all by myself, - you don't realize that he's holding two cups and you honestly forgot how to say 'thank you'. He turns around very slowly, looking you in the eyes all the way and you put on your most exaggerated charming smile.

- Oh my God, I'm so sorry, oppa, you are the smartest that I have ever met! - you would hang on his arm or something but apart him being very open and comfortable with you, it's still obvious that he's much older. Literally twice your age. That would be crossing the lines.

Jiwon pretends to think for a moment and you smile as innocent as possible and he suddenly nods, with the same exaggerated satisfaction, passing you the hot cup.

- I saw you spacing out, thought coffee will help. Must be difficult these days for you? - he just stands here, leaning with one hand on a table and he looks.. stunning. His style is perfect without trying and you can swear the color black belongs to him. And you just broke up with the boyfriend. Stop. But maybe it's his care that looks stunning, huh. Sounds lame, but.. unless?

- Yeah, I just.. - actually you have zero fucking idea on how to answer his question. He wouldn't be asking if he wasn't interested in what you are going to say. Yet you also had no intentions on showering him with your problems so you look at him, trying not to look desperate and shake your shoulders, - You heard everything, right?

He nods and you sip coffee, trying to not to burn your lips.

- I did, sorry, - he places his cup onto the table, putting both of hands in the pockets of his joggers, - You broke his self esteem, not his heart. So don't worry about sounding like a bitch.

He's actually very right. But there is something that will eat you anyway. Nice, though, that he's trying to help you. Hella weird.

- But it will eat me a couple of months anyway, - you continue to drink your coffee, staring at the material of his black tshirt, not seeing anything anyway when he speaks again.

- Your words about sex will eat him at least a couple of years. So don't worry, you won this one, - and you choke on your coffee, spitting it everywhere, trying to laugh and feel ashamed at the same time. Jiwon wipes brown drops from his upper arm that happened to be on the way of your hysteria, laughing not so loud but any way very pleasing. No need to be ashamed, apparently.

It wasn't funny. It was just so weird to hear it from him.

- I won't ever again buy you drinks, - he's laughing, hanging you tissues and taking the cup out of your hands, throwing it into the trash, - C'mon. Break must be over by now.

And he's so light, just like that. Jiwon doesn't make you talk about it further, doesn't try to get into your head with advices; he said what he wanted to say and listened to you for as much as you needed.

Does being intelligent comes with age?

You wipe your mouth, making your way after him when you get this feeling again; why does your whole life feels like a fanfiction? Of course Sungha needs to stand in the dark corner near vending machine like a fucking anime antihero.

You couldn't see him earlier, but.. Jiwon did. You look at his back, being not just surprised, but absolutely fucking stumbled. Why? He didn't do anything extra, but he could have been silent about such an intimate detail, as sex. But he wasn't. He deadass joked about it. And it led you to one thought: was he angry at him?

No way. Probably.

After looking at him for a moment, it feels like all that joy and relaxation you got from talking to Jiwon disappears in mere seconds. You feel so pressured again. You fucked it up. Again.

Sungha follows you and you feel his eyes imprinting 'you will regret this' on the back of your neck; you literally can feel it. It's funny how you have been knowing every bad thing about him and his friends and still decided to say 'yes' to this relationships. It started as a mess, and it will end the same.

Position "I will make him better" was never intended to work anyway.

Jiwon holds a door for you and you enter practice room, slightly nodding to him as 'thank you'. Even though you are going to dance so close to him; so close to the point you never knew you wanted to, you had no intention to continue this rehearsal. Not even the slightest.

And when the choreographer was talking to Jiwon about changing partners and he was actually very surprised or even when the music started to play, you had absolutely no emotions on your face. And so the troubles begin.

Of course, that made choreographer perofm a very nice thing called 'I will fucking end you if you continue to ruin my pattern' and it made you even more irritated and you forgot how many times you clumsy bumped into Eun Jiwon's limbs with yours. He helped you. A lot. Messing it up himself, sometimes. Sometimes receiving your palm slapping his chest. You didn't see even a tiny muscle changing on his face to form an angry emotion. And it's all extremely touching and his patience is made of steel when he wants it to be like that, but.. you still can't concentrate.

- You know what? I'm tired, - you hear Jiwon nag loudly, after you stepped on his foot for the third time and music stops the moment after his words, - I can't work like that.

Was you ready to cry? Because you even feel your eyes watering. You never expected him to care about you more than he already did, but he clearly saw what was happening.

Though it's only your fault. You move away from him a little, brushing your hair back and close your eyes. There are three more candidates who can do that. Not a big problem for him to change.

Jiwon moves in the direction of the woman who's now particularly burns with flames of rage and you know that you are the one they are discussing and feels so pitiful. You really wish it didn't ruin your pride.

And it's not how they talk while looking around on dancers that made you feel like shit. It's how everyone know that you were declined and that it's absolutely your fault; and they feel like it's prior duty to stare at you so.. contemptuously. Everyone have their bad days. Yours just happen to be today. It doesn't make you worse or better, but it's hard to persuade yourself to think like that because you are already digging yourself in.

And his rejection is actually making it hundred times worse.

- So, I wanted to say that I'm extremely tired and that's it for today, - Jiwon stands in the centre of the room, looking at you all with such a sincere sorrow. You title your head, frowning. What the fuck? - I know that it's still a long way to go, but let's have an evening off today. We all are doing great and I am very thankful for all the hard work you do for me, - he speaks so.. slowly and thoughtfully. Like he really means it. It's nice, - And besides, I'm not getting younger so I need to rest. Let's pretend it's not the main reason, - you catch your 'what the fuck' expression in the mirror and he laughs, continue to talk like only he can. You have no idea how to explain that. It just hits differently, - So let's go, run faster until our very scary choreographer didn't change her mind. Go!

He claps his hands, bowing a little and continue to stand where he is, scrolling through his phone after politely saying bye to everyone who was addressing him. You don't move even a bit because now you feel like it's your prior duty to hail him. Of course people will know the truth, but he at least made an attempt to make it seems like it wasn't your fault.

You don't know how to feel about that. You really don't.

He stares at his phone and you wait until all the people are gone, clearing your throat to make him notice you.

- Shit, you scared me. I was ready to call you, - you title your head again, because what is wrong with him. He walks to the door, opening it for you again. What the..

- I am confused, but I still will say what I wanted to, - you come closer, letting the door shut and now it's his turn to be surprised because you just realized that you have a face that says 'I'm about to beat you up'. And you are not, - I wanted to say sorry for my work. I did a lot of mistakes. And I will understand if you are going to change me for someone else. I am truly sorry. And also I want to say thank you for what you did. It was.. great. Thank you.

Lowering you head, you look at his sneakers and sigh loudly.

- Look, I understand everything. I know what you are capable of and I will not judge you now, - he does it again. Sounds so mature. Reassuring. Calming. His voice is low and manly suddenly and you feel goosebumps running wild on your skin and you finally look at him, smiling, - But if you hit me one more time..

He pokes a finger at you and you laugh, murmuring short 'sorry' again, hearing how he chuckles softly. He's not mad. At all. You are so used to bullshit out of everything that when people actually treat each other like human beings it makes you lost.

- Okay. Remember when I told you I am not going to buy you drinks? - he looks at you mischievously and you nod slowly, making that "the fuck" face, - Lies. I will.

Now it's time to make that 'so...?' face and you do exactly it.

- Do you.. drink? - is he trying to ask you.. out? Like, is it.. no, it can't be real. It's ridiculous. No. Unless?

- I.. do, - the whole conversation sounds like two very slow idiots are trying to decide on something.

- So.. Me too, - you can't help but laugh shortly looking at his expression and then come back to the 'idiots' performance.

- That's... Nice. That we two drink, - you nod, trying your best to not to laugh again and he does exactly same. Hilarious to watch.

- So shall we.. do it together? - he stumbles for a moment then rolls his eyes and then smile, waving his hand in the air, - What I wanted to say is that I want you to relax and I don't know a better way than to drink. So let's go.

You know one that's better than drinking. But let's say he won't understand if you say it out loud.

Finally you just nod, exiting the room first.

Plot: You are a dancer of his team and, as The Fanfiction's Rule prescribe, you find yourself falling in love with Jiwon. You found yourself falling for every little difference he has. You are heplessly gone. Or not?

Characters: Eun Jiwon/'You'

Warnings: swearing.

A/N: Take a note, this is important part of a story: the 'you' person is under 25-26. Someone older wouldn't probably fit entirely, but since you all are here for nsfw part, there it wouldn't matter ahah

- It's not okay to be that late, right? - you hear someone sitting down right next to you, sighing harshly. Oh how you understand that sigh, - It's already been an hour. I fed up with waiting.

- Are you going to be the one who would say that to him? - you laugh, leaning backwards and the guy near you humps something under his nose, shaking his head, - Thought so.

But the thing is, he is absolutely right. You so fed up with waiting. Eun Jiwon is hella late for dance practice and if this would be his first time doing so, it would be doubtly okay. But the fourth one is getting out of hand. Yet what can you do? Complain to his manager? Complain to Jiwon himself? Being late yourselves? Throw rocks at him, in the end? Nothing's gonna work. Because if he's late, he wanted to be late. You see it in his eyes everytime he apologizes.

Eun Jiwon is not sorry at all.

Somehow you even respect him for his honesty. Man needs to have a tremendous amount of bravery, nerves and talent to be that shameless. Must be tiring, after all.

- And, what are you doing on Friday evening? Perhaps you and Sungha might visit my birthday party. No presents, just bring alcohol and something to eat. So what?

You barely know him. For real. It must one of the first times you two even have a somewhat decent conversation? He's new to the team and in general not really a bad guy (who knows though), but there is something you just don't like about him. And his offer. If he's about to invite every one that he sees, it will be a dirty mess. It's not like you are "homegirl" kind of a person, but being stuckes in a small flat with tons of drunk people in the middle of nowhere is not quite your cup of tea.

- We'll come, - your thoughts on how to say "no" in the most polite way possible were interrupted by your boyfriend, who now stands at the other side of you, leaning to the huge mirror and nodding happily.

- Then party it is, - you answer, making it obvious for Sungha that your 'happy' smile isn't happy at all and murmur 'who likes to rest after the long week anyway' under your breath.

- What did you say?

There is no time to answer the question, because your eyes met a long awaited 'main star' who tries to pretend that everything is okay and he wasn't late for an hour, bowing slightly as part of saying hello. Indeed, shameless.

- What? Let's get to work, the sooner we start, the sooner we end, - throwing rocks at him doesn't seem like a bad idea anymore; and judging by people around' expressions, not only for you.

Actually you don't mind waiting. It's not like you need to endure cold weather, rain, snow, thirst or hunger; you just.. relax. You have everything around, you can eat and drink and chat with someone; just do whatever you want. You just love complaining, probably. And you badly afraid to miss your bus, among everything. It's all fun until you will have to go to your home in the middle of the night by your own feet.

The practice goes smoothly, as it should be. The pros of working with someone who has experience and desire to actually make a performance better are undeniable. Somehow you, dancers, yourselves, cause more problems than Eun Jiwon ever did since you started to train together. Might be because he moves as he likes to; he knows every move and you see it clearly, everybody does. Yet he brought something new in the way he works it; only for himself, in his own style. Nobody does it like him and you understood it perfectly through almost two weeks of practicing together.

Apart from being surprisingly (for you) gifted in dancing, he was the same surprisingly humble sunbae. It's not like you worked with a lot, but the amount of men who caught a star with their short lasting fame you have met amazes you every time.

So overall Eun Jiwon was someone who you never imagined to be a person that he is. Quite unusual, actually.

And the most unusual part in all this is that you were particularly staring at him for, well, more than two hours and he was absolutely aware of this fact. It's not like you were ashamed or felt an urge to blush whenever you have been catching an eye contact, it's just.. weird. Everyone will find it weird; even though you didn't really mean anything. He just happened to stay in your focus while you were occupied with thoughts and work. It's not like you need this practice anyway. As many of you, actually.

The only thing you care about now is that you are terribly missing the last bus. Maybe fifteen minutes ago you had a chance, but now when it's clear that you are going to use your feet while going home in the blistering cold after almost three hours of non-stop dancing and knowing that tomorrow you will need to wake up early, your mood is absolutely destroyed. And so when the practice is announced to be over, you try your best to put on the most pure and happy smile without making your shitty mood visible.

- Would you be able to walk me home? I missed my bus and the subway is closed at my station, please, - you can't persuade your boyfriend to do everything, it's obvious. But you know that he lives near by and doesn't really need to do anything tomorrow, so.. why not try? In the sweetest voice you could ever maintain, of course.

He is nice. He really is. You date him for a reason, in the end. He's just.. the feeling is never perfect when it comes to him.

- Uhm, I.. - Sungha touches his neck, avoiding eye contact and you sigh, letting go of his arm softly, - I'm really sorry.

- It's alright, I understand. I also have a lot to do in the morning, ugh, - he hugs you, placing soft kiss on your temple and then look you deadass in the eyes while telling the most stupid bullshit he could have ever said without any sign of shame.

- Nah, I don't actually, I just promised to go with guys to celebrate some shit and it's already late. I promised, I'm sorry, love, - he smiles and you know that he means no bad. He just.. doesn't understand. It's not his or his friends or your fault; he's just like that, no one can change that except him. And you are not here to teach him manners. Especially when you want to break at least his nose.

- Ok, have fun, - you pat on his shoulder, avoiding his lips with a frown and just turn around to leave.

The same shit was popping up for the the last few weeks and those reasons why you fell in love with him; you don't really remember any of them anymore.

You didn't turn around when he called you, just straight up to the door, trying to surpass the crushing sensation in your throat. No way you will cry because of someone who doesn't care; too many honors. It's just a very bad day. Everything at once and all this.. maybe calling an expensive as hell taxi is a great idea, after all. No money can buy you new nerves.

Shoving your belongings to the tote bag, you desperately try to calm yourself down, because God knows, it's the lowest you have ever been in months. Those days when a fall of a pen can cause a mental breakdown; you hate it. Probably everyone does. It just happened to be today. Not a big deal.

There is nothing more than a comfortable ride home and sleep you are dreaming about. Not even impenetrable ignorance of Sungha bothers you. You'll deal with it tomorrow. Now - a car and a bed.

Yet life is not that simple and we are not in a fanfiction. A taxi? In the middle of the night? Huh. Nonsense. The thing is, no one wants to take an order for such a short and therefore not so profitable ride. Nice. And here you are, standing in the middle of the street in a fucking bone breaking cold waiting for at least someone to accept your order. Thanks God you are at least under a roof of YG Ent entrance. Lights and security. If not cold, you would just sleep here. You will need to come tomorrow anyway.

- Hey, why are you still here? - you hear voice of a person with whom you doubtly want to talk. Eun Jiwon. If not his lateness, you might have been in your bed already. But here he is, standing not far away from you, looking around in the weirdest way possible, - Why aren't you going home? It's late.

- I missed my bus. Subway station where I live is closed. Taxi doesn't want me. Enough? - you didn't mean to sound rude. But you are physically can't make up needed politeness right know; not now, please.

- Yeah, - he's nodding, turning around to leave and, to be extremely honest, now it's pretty much impossible to suppress tears. His back when he has moved in the direction of parking is too much. But what can he do? He's, again, not guilty in not meeting your expectations. Thanks for asking, at least.

And you will not cry now. In your bed, alone - maybe; most probably. But here - no way.

You look at the screen of smartphone again to find absolute nothing. By feet then.

- It's not that far anyways, - you sigh, adjusting your bag on a shoulder when you see a car stopping in a distance and.. it's creepy. You are not a panicking type, but now situation smells like shit and if someone would try to pack you in their trunk, most probably, they would succeed. Even with YG's security. Even with cameras. And lightning everywhere. Not a panicking type, yeah.

But while you were occupied with thoughts on how you should attack them, you missed Eun Jiwon standing in front of the car. You notice him when he starts to speak and it's the third time you want to cry today; just the emotions right now are completely different.

- You are stuck here because of me. And I feel bad for sleeping too much, - Jiwon smiles, pursuing his lips a little and somehow you can't be angry with him. He's honest, it's written on his face, - So I want to ask you if it's okay if I drive you home? As an apology.

And now you see some parallels you never wanted to see. Because your beloved boyfriend is somewhere out there chilling with 'guys' and someone, who's not even slightly responsible for you, is here.

He knows what he did wrong; and Jiwon doesn't slip an empty 'sorry' into nowhere. He apologizes while thinking about what he actually did wrong and how to change that. Such a rare trait to witness.

- I don't think that it's..

- If I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't ask, - even in his smile, you see that he's serious about it. It's hard to say 'no' right now. For many reasons.

- Okay then, - it's not like you want to decline a Mercedes ride either, let's be honest. He nods, opening the door for you and muttering small 'thank you', you hop inside, holding your breath for no apparent reason.

It's not like it was your first time sitting in this type of car costs like your approximately two year's allowance, it's just a bit...weird. Yet so extremely comfortable.

Jiwon is quick to seat beside you, driving away quickly. He puts on the heater immediately and you feel your face melting. You might as well fall in love with this car.

- Drop me your address, - you are still pressing your bag to your chest trying to relax when you hear him and you proceed what he means for a moment. What a fucked up day, you feel like a fool all of a sudden and it's not even weird at this point.

- I don't have your number, - now he's feeling himself like a fool and you laugh, glancing at his expression. He manages to look mature and hilarious at the same time. Mocking his fakely irritated 'write it then', you sign his contact as 'Eun Jiwon' and it feels.. interesting.

You send him a location of your home and then watch as he puts it into GPS, clearly not having an idea where is it.

- Does it happen often? - just the moment you manage to relax, Jiwon pushes you out of your wondering of how good it smells without cheap leather odor and disgusting sweet car condition aroma. You think for a minute then nod slowly, because it actually does.

- Not so often, but still, - you steal a glance at him again. It's not like you can stare at anyone with your boyfriend still being your boyfriend, but today is a mess. And Jiwon is certainly a nice sight to look at, - I can go on my own, but I'm tired today. Plus it's hard to grab a taxi from there, plus, - you emphasize it, watching how sights outside the window are a lot more familiar now, - Hella expensive. I don't even know why. They think I shit with money if I am taking a cab from YG? Fucking nonsense.

Jiwon laughs through all your ted talk and it's so contagious, suddenly. You lean on a seat, laughing as well, feeling your cheeks ache a little. Funny how it's light around all of a sudden. Perhaps it's because you feel yourself so distant from all that stress that got into you today? Because Jiwon was able to come and just sort it out without asking. Well, he can't fix Sungha, but the more you think about it, the more you realise that there is nothing to be fixed. Nothing you are able to fix, probably.

So, apparently, Jiwon helped you even there.

- It's not that funny, actually, - you look at him again and you meet his eyes suddenly. You don't even want to say 'watch the road', because for no reasons you are able to trust him with your life and overall you value the fact that he is looking at you more than the fact that you can die. He was holding a gaze for a second and you already imagined imaginations. Sungha, boyfriend, still alive. Stop.

- You were hilarious though, like, - he's silent for a second while he looks for a place to park, - Like Lucy. She also gets furious randomly and sounds exactly like you did.

- You just compared me to your girlfriend? She wouldn't like that, - you laugh because it's really funny. Yet no one was ever sure if he's single or not. You never expected finding out in this circumstances.

- What? No, - he laughs louder, hiding his teeth with his palm and looks at you for a few seconds with those shiny eyes, giggling like a teenager and you can't see a forty years old man in him anymore, - She's my dog.

Did he just boldly compared you to his dog?

Forty years old man, yeah.

You inhale deeply, trying to surpass a laugh and poke a finger at him, silently making your point. Jiwon makes the cutest 'what are you going to do to me, huh?' face, pursing his lips like a five year old boy and.. And you really try your best to keep 'I'll end you' look on your face (Spoiler: you failed). Anyhow, you want to forgive him for this comparison simply because he wasn't sulky about you being totally impolite with him. No fragile masculinity detected.

- This changes everything! - you turn around, opening the door because he literally had just parked and you leave, making sure he understands that you are kidding with this fake offense little perfomance and that he's smiling, when you turned around to wave him before entering the building.

The thing is, when you come home, you are not tired anymore. By any means; if not your mother sleeping peacefully you would probably be loud and hyperactive. And since you need to cosplay a ninja right now, you just lay on your bed, watching the ceiling silently. Perfect ending for a fucked up day.

You hear your phone buzzing and what you didn't expect to see is a message from Jiwon. The day couldn't be any more perfect, but it managed.

You open a short video of little and immensely cute white dog tiny barking at watches that lay on a sofa, buzzing. You even replay it, to seek for the point when he sends another text.

'she got angry with them because they were making sounds'

- Guess it shouldn't have any meaning, right? - you tap a replay with short but excited: 'she's cute!!' and feel your throat clenching suddenly at his instant reply.

'that's why I told that you are just like her'

You are not going to say that you feel like a teenager from some manga slowly falling in love with the main character but that's exactly how you feel.

After adjusting your breathing to normal again, you choose to ignore that (to not to show how fucking excited his subtle complement made you) and text him how thankful you are for his ride and wish him and his furiously cute Lucy a good night. And after some other preparations, you, again, choosing to ignore your actual boyfriend who's trying to call and text you for a good hour already.

Characters: Eun Jiwon/'you';

Warnings: pure smut, what else would u expect from me.

His bed was the most comfortable bed you have ever happened to sleep in. And so even if you never started to live together and you had your own place to stay in, whenever he was leaving for more than a couple of days for shootings, you always came to here.

He gave you keys so you could take care of Lucy. You both knew this was completely not a reason; you missed him to death everytime and he loved coming back to someone waiting for him.

It's a win-win.

And so this time was no different; after you took Lucy for her evening walk and took a shower, you put on his shirt and underwear and finally bury yourself in his puffy cover and pillows.

That's the main reason you are here; it feels like Jiwon is all around you. Falling asleep here - almost perfect.

And waking up because you feel someone slowly kissing the back of your neck feels amazing. It really does. Until you feel the wave of panic washing over you; you fell asleep alone. And you surely closed the door and Lucy is silent and..

- It's me, - just the way the wave fell upon, it washed away and you realised you haven't been breathing. Jiwon stops, pulling away and you turn to lay on your back, watching him smiling gently, - Sorry.

He looks.. different. Usually he's playful and teasing, often irritated, but he's now so soft and serious. You smile, shaking your head as 'it's okay' and you just can't hide how hard you missed him, looking at him with all the love you can manage. It's been more than a week. And you can tell that's exactly why he feels so unusual; Jiwon missed you harder.

You turn around completely and he hovers on top of you, tossing the cover to the end of the bed. It's cold suddenly, yet no matter how cliche it is.. it's warm when he's around.

You feel his breath softly roaming on your lips, but he doesn't kiss you; his breath tingling on your skin, making you inhale shakily. He smiles, looking at you and touches the tip of your nose with his, making you giggle lightly. Jiwon touches your lips with his, but you, again, barely feel it. He's tender, painfully gentle with you and it makes your heart flatter wildly.

His kisses burn and melt you like you are under a fire everytime, but that.. you can't decide what's better.

You close your eyes, crossing fingers at the back of his neck, caressing long hair, answering him with the exact same manner. Jiwon is so calm, warm and.. comfortable? You can't describe the feeling; nobody can compare. And the thing is, you can never bear his gaze; always piercing and intense when he's turned on, yet now he looks at you with such a deep adoration and need. His look almost screams that 'I missed you' that he doesn't say out loud and you can't resist him; anything he wants - he will get it.

And more than ever, Jiwon wants your pleasure.

You feel his lips on your neck, the kiss is so light you barely can say when he parts, slowly getting lower. God, he can be so sinfully gentle when he wants to. You feel his hands everywhere at once, cupping your breast lightly under your shirt and the other caressing the skin just under the line of your underwear. While continuously showering you with soft butterfly kisses all around your neck. You grip on his hair slightly, shutting your eyes to not to at least see what he's doing. It's hilarious how he can make you halfawaken lost state be turned into.. this. In seconds.

Jiwon hugs your waist, helping you to get up a little to take your shirt off and you can't resist the urge to kiss him, holding onto his shoulders for dear life and.. kissing, to be honest, with the exact same emotion. He smiles with that damned gentle small smile when you part away from him, falling on your pillow, not being able to hold on anymore. Because you can't even breath properly after just one kiss. Deep, sensual and full of desire kiss. He manages to make a mess out of you everytime it happens and you are still surprised.

- What'd you want, baby? - Jiwon leaves a small gentle peck on your lips and you feel a wave of warmth spreading in your body, making your shiver, - What you want?

You moan and he smiles again, leaving a trail of small kisses along your jawline.

It's impossible to ask or to say what you really want him to do; it's not about being shy or not open enough when it comes to sex, it's just.. isn't it.. And Jiwon sees that mixed confusion on your face, kissing your lower lip, never breaking eye contact.

- Just tell me, - feeling how he massages your nipples, you let out a shaky quite moan, going through his long hair to pull him with it down your body.

You won't be able to tell him. At least not now and God knows it's not the first time you imagine him being between your legs but surely the first one when it actually is about to happen.

He didn't even flinch, like he already was planning on it (because he did) and you meowl barely audible again when he blows at one of the wet traces from his lips, cupping your breasts firmly. You pull on his shoulders, whining softly when he circles your navel with his tongue. Feels breathtaking already and you still have your underwear on. And he's fully, goddammit, clothed.

Jiwon sit on his knees, looking you straight in the eyes and the look is so.. gentle. Again. He takes off your underwear slowly, making sure to follow the material with his hands, caressing your legs from tights to ankles. He loves the way your body reacts on him; whatever he does, you are all into him. Even now you move closely to him, feeling how your heart pounds rapidly. Your love for him too addictive; it's pretty much the main reason.

And that's why your whole body trembles with sweet anticipation, you shiver at every his touch and he kisses your knee, finally finishing admiring you. You touch his messy hair, smiling when he looks at you going down with small kisses on your thigh.

You look away and Jiwon hugs your legs, trapping you in his arms and you palm his hair, when he leaves a kiss just below your navel; you push him down, not being able to control and he does what you asked for, spreading you with his fingers, to gently kiss already sensitive skin, making you roll your eyes and push yourself into him unconsciously. You whine not so softly now at the feeling of his hot tongue on your skin and how passionately he does it; Jiwon combines everything, from small gentle butterfly kisses that makes you squirm impatiently to hungry devouring sucking that makes you go completely crazy. Nothing in your mind but his moves; Jiwon doesn't touch you with his fingers, just his tongue and lips, and it is so fucking good. It's so enough. You brush his hair when he parts a little, giving you just a moment to catch a breath and the way he licks his lips, looking at you and that shameless smirk on his face.. you just can't look at him. You might even be blushing. God. And when you look away, he buries his head between your legs again, pressuring over sensitive clit with his tongue, making you whine helplessly all over again.

You can't see him, but you can bet he has that smug smirk on his face. He loves what he does and it makes it one hundred times better.

You moan loudly at this point, giving zero fucks about.. everything, basically, and with every sound you make, he builds up his pace. You can't even control your body, everything is blurry and Jiwon holds your thighs firmly, not giving you a chance to move.

But God everything you want is to be closer. You grip his hair everytime Jiwon does something different and.. you always knew he's the best you've ever kissed. You lowkey knew he's that skilled when it comes to this.

It doesn't take much time before you feel how everything fades, leaving you only the strong sensation of his mouth devouring you; the hardest orgasm you have ever had hits with such a force, you forget how to inhale for a moment. And he guides you through it, only slowing down when he feels how you relax. Jiwon kisses oversensetive skin again, and again and fucking again and you jerk a little from him, whining, because you are literally not able to form your complaint.

Jiwon crawls back on top of you and now.. it's The Jiwon you know. If you didn't know him better, you might have thought that it's curiosity that sparks in the way he looks at you. He's not blind and he should see in the total mess that he did put of you, an answer for his silent 'how was it?' question.

You put both of your arms on his neck, dragging him closer for a kiss and now the knowledge about what exactly he does ten times better than kissing, makes your head spin.

You will never let this slide.

- Good morning, - you whisper in his lips and kiss him again, stroking his hair slowly. He does that mind blowing 'uhm' face and.. thanks God you are barely alive to die anyway.

- I missed you, - it's your turn to smile and you nod slowly, grabbing his tshirt from the back to help him take it off. He looks at you fakely shocked and you shrug, hugging his waist with your ankles.

- I won't be able to sleep anyway, - now it's your turn to smirk and you slowly guide your hand down his torso, watching his pupils delaying right away.

You might as well think that he must be away more often if it means.. this treatment.

challenge: no kisses from Jiwon.

characters: Eun Jiwon/'you'

warnings: pure smut.

It was a great date, really, amazing one, but you realised that something better is going to happen when Jiwon pulled you on his laps while you were taking off your dress.

- What? - you know what he wants. God, his hands wondering up your tights and the way he stares at you - he's so clear about his desires.

- You look beautiful, - you smile, touching his perfectly done hair, unbuttoning his black shirt with the other hand.

He looks better. He always does. Effortlessly.

It's hard to fight with the urge to kiss him and it's not like you want to; the moment you touch his neck with your lips, grip on your ass feels tighter and he pushes you closer. You know that he wants you; it makes you tremble in all the right places. You continue on kissing him, knowing exactly how to making him feel the same. One kiss right under his ear and Jiwon furrows his brows, hissing at the feeling of your soft humps on his bulge.

You push his chest lightly and he's very generous to actually obey you today. Jiwon falls on the bed, leaving you sitting on him and.. there are so many things you want to do to him. He rarely gives you this chance, it would be a pity to waste it.

You lean to him, leaving small wet kisses around his adam apple and he squeezes your tights harder, making the friction between your bodies more tangible.

- Jiwon, no, - and you won't let him do that. Whispering it in his ear, you bite it a bit harder than needed to suck on it right after.

Jiwon humps something barely audible, leaving your tights and now lightly hugs your waist. He surrenders. Feels amazing.

Continuing to slowly hump on him, you leave a trail of small pink hickeys on his neck and collarbones, biting on one softly.

He's so hard at this point. You feel him getting bigger between you legs and his breath is so erratic. He could say whatever he wants, but you just know that he fucking loves it when you are gentle, slow and firm with him. It's always on another level when you have a chance to make him feel like this. Jiwon always gives you all you want, it mostly all about you when it comes to sex. He doesn't even give you a chance to treat him. And judging by his blesses expression, he might be doubting some of his life decisions now.

You kiss him on parted lips and he responds quickly, reaching for you madly when you part and God, his eyes never been so dark.

You are worked up, but he's burning with desire. Knowing that it's because of you.. boosts your confidence everytime.

You leave a kiss on his chin, then lower and lower; soft warm wet kisses and he moans when you reach his navel, making you close your eyes in attempt to calm down. You are quick to sit between his legs and he pushes himself on elbows, slowly putting a hand on the back of your head.

It's the first time. You are equally surprised as he is.

Continuing to kiss every millimeter of the skin on his lower abdomen, you palm him through thick black jeans material and hear him hissing violently again. His attitude right now is so sexually appealing, you want to experience this on the fullest.

You look at him, trying to ignore how he looks with this frown and biting his lower lip, or how his chest moves wildly from how tough is breathing.. it's impossible to not to stare at him, but you force yourself to focus on giving him more pleasure. You softly kiss harsh material and you can swear you saw a glimpse of irritated 'fuck you' in his eyes and his lips flinch before he throws his head back, growling long annoeyd 'fuck'. You smirk. It would be slow and sensual, because you want it like that. At least for now.

Unziping his jeans, you take them along with hus underwear lower with his help and he moans at the feeling of your hand stroking him liglty. The thing is, you are not far from moaning yourself because the sight made you so frustrated. He's dripping and you make it spread all over his length with your hand, pressing his tip with your thumb gently. The feeling of hot smooth skin is amazing and you never knew you would even think something like that, but you do want to taste him. You have no idea how turned on is he, but you surely feel light fog spreading in front of your eyes.

You take him in without a second thought and he moans so fucking loud; you have never heard him being this audible. Jiwon grips the base of your neck when you start to move your head up and down slowly, taking your time in licking him the way he deserves it. Long wet stripe from the base along the popping out vein makes him swear out loud and he puts pressure on your head when you take him in again, trying to make you go deeper and you know he tries his best to restrain himself, because he releases you in a moment, but you know he doesn't want it to be slow. It's all about him, right?

You part from circling his tip with your tongue and look at him, almost smiling at how frustrated he is. You absolutely love that sight.

Jiwon titles his head, breathing heavily and the moment he caress the base of your neck so gently, tracing his fingertips along your hairline, looking in your eyes with such an adoration, you.. he's the best. He can barely breath yet that little gesture; it means so much more than just 'I love you'.

- Don't hold back.

You smirk, taking him in your mouth again, never breaking eye contact. Jiwon sits straight in a moment, taking your hair in one swift movement in one hand, pressuring your head with the other. You close your eyes, allowing him to guide you the way he wants; fast and deep. He never cross the line and when you choke lightly on him, Jiwon whispers barely audible 'sorry baby' and lights the pressure instantly, letting you rest for a moment. The moment you on him again, he mutters low and firm 'relax', thrusting deeper and you obey, taking him in almost fully.

- Good job.

You didn't want to be turned on at how he praises you, but you are. You can feel how your body is longing for him; you want him even more right now. And Jiwon knows it.

You know that he's close because he's erratic and can barely control his voice or hands. You grip his jeans, not knowing where to put you hands when he deepthroats you again and you moan, sending vibration all over his length in your mouth, making him moan again. Jiwon praises you again, muttering soft 'just like that, baby, good'.

He never called you names. Apparently you are into it.

God, you so are.

Jiwon does it again, more faster and harder, and the way he looks at you with your hair being in a messy gentle grip of his all the time, makes it all worth it. You try to look at him and he can't even maintain eye contact; Jiwon rarely looks so lost in chasing his orgasm and it made you proud all over again.

- I'm.. - he tries to pull you away. He really does. But it's still all about him and the only one thing you know for sure is that he likes to cum inside. It's your first time giving him a head and you want him to take all from it.

Jiwon press your head tight into him the moment he realizes you are not going anywhere and you feel him releasing deep inside you instantly. He stops and the only thing you see is muscles flexing on his lower abdomen as he unconsciously tries to get more and go deeper. You swallow it without even thinking about it and when he lets you go, you look him in the half opened eyes and lick him again, sucking on sensitive reddish skin in attempt to clean everything.

You wanted to taste him. Tastes nice.

Literally the next moment you lay on a bed with him pressing you in sheets and smirking the most dissolute smirk you have ever seen in him.

Prompt: Teach me how to play.

Characters: Eun Jiwon / 'you'

Warnings: graphic description of sex, swearing.

Jiwon was sitting in his studio for god knows how long and you were determined to get him out of this place. He is not a person to skip a meal, but he surely able to work nonstop without sleeping or talking to anyone. And he has a schedule tomorrow; would be a pity if someone would miss it. Right? You don't want that.

Working in his team for almost four years taught you a lot about being patient and, in a ways, sly. Because it is impossible to get him to do things that he doesn't want to, but need to, without brazen lies, flattery and threatening.

There is no one in the building because it is three in the morning and you sigh, unlocking the door with your pass. Security must be sleeping anyways. Making your way in the direction of his studio, you try to stay calm and do some kind of rehearsal for what you gonna say when you see him. It must be simple, because he probably is sleepy. Probably.

Opening the door, you only see his back and moving to the bit in headphones head in deem lights of the room. He doesn't like it bright. Trying not to scary him, you put your hand on shoulder extremely lightly, almost softly, making flinch away from you anyways. Scary kitten. He is farpre older than you, but God knows you find him shitless cute.

- Fuck, if you scare me like that one more time, I might die, - Jiwon grabs his head, putting messy hair backway and leans on a chair, looking at you with a reasonable question, - What are doing here?

- You need to be sleeping right now, - you sit yourself in a chair right beside him and look at all of those screens and musical instruments in front of you. You have no idea why would one use so many, but anyways.

- I have a little work to do, - Jiwon leans to the table again and rubs his face, sipping ices coffee right after.

- It doesn't look like it's little, - you look at his side profile, studying it carefully and he's, in fact, handsome. You can't deny it. He is. But maybe you are just sleepy.

- Yeah, it isn't, - Jiwon laughs shortly and you smile at him, nodding your head, - Would you mind to help?

He heard you singing. You were wasted and he was laughing and filming, but you are still not ashamed; that evening have said everything about your music talent and he's very aware of it. So what's gotten into him?

- Yeah, but.. uhm, - you nervously loon around, biting on your lip and look at him again only to notice how serious yet soft he is, - I can't.

- Why? What if I ask you to get me coffee? - soft. Yeah. My ass. You pout almost angrily and mock his expression, muttering something about heading home, - I'm kidding. Just listen.

He then looks at the screen, trying to turn on a sample and you look at the synthesizer. Next words are falling from your lips without a single notice from you and it's panic. It's a shocking panic.

- Teach me how to play? - you try not to look at him, because you said something you didn't want to say and it's suddenly hot in here. Never in your life have you thought about blushing because of him.

It's just a little pause before he humps something, looking at you and you look at your own hands without maintaining an eye contact. Because no. Not now.

- Yeah. Sure, - you weren't expecting him to answer positively and you finally look at him with surprised expression, - What? You are not too bad for something simple.

And the next thing he does make you lost every fucking nerve you have; because he puts his hands on top of yours that lay on keys, firmly pressing them into black and white plastic. You didn't want to think about how it is good to feel his hands on yours; or how veins are popping out of his tanned skin. And how it is breathtakingly good to feel his hot, smooth skin on yours.

You bite your lip when he presses one of his fingers, making the electronic piano release quite sound. Then the second one. And three more. You wish you understand the rhythm. Because now Jiwon tells you to repeat it and the only thing you thought about is his presence so close.

Nevertheless you try to press the first key and the instrument makes an ugly sound, making Jiwon laugh and you sigh. You are not sad, not surprised. There are whole different emotions that flow in you.

- You need to be a lot slower, - he does it again; pressing your finger with hs into the key and you shut your eyes, trying to forget at least about how his hands are look like on yours, - And gentle. Like this.

You could have misunderstood his first sentence, being said in low whisper around your ear, but now he made ab effort to hump it into your skin, making a herb of goosebumps run down your spine.

Holy fuck, what's wrong with him? You absolutely love it.

You haven't ever seen him as a man; he is your boss. But you just can't deny how fucking fine he is; everything about him. If only any of men you have been with were even a slightest like him, oh God. Jiwon always stood above; maybe you haven't seen him because he was too much for you to handle.

- I'm not into gentle, - you whisper it as well, trying not to lost a moment and you are not here to hide of blush. You two are absolutely grown up adults; who don't fucking even want to care about friendship and career.

- Me too, - and that's when you feel his lips on your cheekbones, kissing it as gently as possible. You catch your breath in your lungs, when he bumps his forehead into your temple, leaving light kisses everywhere he can.

You try to preach a million thousands 'no' in your head, squeezing your eyes shot and breathing heavily but he's still here and his fucking hands are still on top of yours.

It's not gonna be simple now anyway, right?

Turning to his side slowly, you finally meet his eyes and his gaze traps instantly. He looks at you with half closed dark brown eyes and everything stops for a second. Just a mere second before he crashes his lips on yours with harsh kiss; biting, sucking on each other's lips; you couldn't even imagine he would be so skilled. Jiwon got you moaning into the kiss without even deepening it.

You cling onto him, trying to be closer, tugging on his hair and t-shirt, feeling his arms having it's everywhere on your body. He feels amazing. Having his arms underneath your shirt is better you have ever expected. He parts a little, gasping for air and dragging you to his laps which you probably too happily obligate.

You grind on him the moment your hips land on his and he hisses as you make your movements slower, making sure to push on his buldge everytime. The look he gives you alone is enough to send you on fire; you saw his gaze many times, but now it's like a whole different person. You moan again, unconsciously; simply because of the thoughts he gives you.

Jiwon grabs on your waist, dropping his head backwards and it gives you one of the sexiest sights you have ever saw. His long hair are sticking to the temples, lips parting with hectic breath, hands resting on your waist and that fucking plain black t-shirt suits him perfectly. Would be better without it though.

You lean forward, resting your hands on his chest and lick his earlobe, feeling how his grip tighten with every touch of the tip of your tongue. He is really sensitive. His skin feels like smooth silk under your lips when you go down slowly; every wildly pulsating vein that you meet makes you forget about everything. Even that you are grinding on a boner of your direct boss.

He's not complaining.

He's trying to strip you.

You feel his fingers under your top, tickling feeling that makes your toes curl and lean into him more. He fumbles on your spine a little longer, finally finding your underwear clasp and than just take it off completely, tossing it somewhere. You feel his thumbs touching your nipples, firmly cupping your breasts with palms and he gives you another short yet not less breathtaking kiss before leaving a hickey and making you squirm, tugging on his hair.

Jiwon is possessive. It was always obvious.

You moan, biting on your lip to prevent yourself from screaming while he sucks on your nipple, kissing it and then he fucking blew on sensitive skin, making you joint from him; only to prevent it with tight grip on your waist.

Jiwon takes you even tighter, kissing you and without any loss of contact you sit on his desk, from which he made a mess a second before to actually sit you on it.

- You're gorgeous, - you hear his whisper to your ear after he was boldly checking you out a moment before.

You didn't think you were still able to blush, but you managed.

Jiwon takes off his shirt and you feel like a teenager all over again; that feeling of strange excitement pouring into you and you feel dizzy, looking at how he pulls a zipper on your pants down, while looking you directly in the eyes. He seduces you steadily. You grip on his shoulders, helping him with taking your clothes off and he grins again, tossing your shorts to your shirt. He hugs you, trying to help you move closer and you moan again at the bare skin contact; he's so hot. Hot and smooth; Jiwon feels fucking amazing and you twitch impatiently, leaving a wet trace on the bulge on his black jeans.

Jiwon shakes his head, stops his contest on who would leave more hickeys - he or he. He's very determined to win.

- Please, - you ars not ashamed to beg him. You would do quite literally everything for him, actually. Begging for him to fuck you is.. a simple task. Jiwon pecks your lips, smiling with all that messy hair, swollen lips and your lipstick on his neck while undoing his belt. Has he participated in courses where they teach how to remove the belt and make a woman cum just by looking at it? Because he almost succeed.

You squirm again, meowling something barely audible while tugging him closer and who would have known French kisses with Eun Jiwon can make you lose your mind completely? It has never felt so good.

He's the best you have ever kissed.

Jiwon leans backwards, breaking the kiss and looking all that glorious and you are.. doomed. You are gone for.

Not the one, my ass.

When he puts a pressure on your clit, circling it steadily, you are ready to scream, but you know that even in the night, there might be people. But fuck is it hard to think straight with his hand between your legs.

You bite on his shoulder and he pushes two fingers inside. Your head is spinning and you moan, muffling it into his skin. Jiwon continues, building you up steadily and it doesn't take a lot of time for you to get on edge; and not a lot from him to stop right away, leaving you hanging with the feeling like even your heart has stopped.

- Fuck you, - it's everything you manage to exhale before letting out another muffled half moan when he thrust himself into you.

Jiwon is painfully slow, you can feel every inch of his length stretching you from the inside and you moan all the way. He buries his face into the crook of your neck, growling and gripping your hips to the point it hurts. He starts to move after a few moments; slowly for firsts, making his way with trembling lips to your neck. Then faster, harsher; your body feels like stretched string and he builds up this mercilessly, steadily, only getting faster and harder. You moan out loud, because who fucking cares now. It's just you and him; his hands, his breath on your skin and sounds of erratic breath and slapping skin. God.

He gets you another sloppy kiss, telling to look ay him but you can't even catch your breath but he's so demanding and you are lost again.

You throw your heas backwards, moaning loudly at this point and feel his lips leaving hickeys everywhere around your throat and you just can't. You cling onto his shoulders, pushing yourself forward again and it's so overwhelming. He's stretching you just enough to make your heas spin like you are drunk; Jiwon hits that particular spot with his tip endlessly, almost mercilessly and you leave small stretches on his back without even thinking about it. He's so good. You couldn't even imagine he can make you feel like this.

Because the next thing you feel is he getting faster with his finger circling on your clit steadily; Jiwon growls to your ear, muttering under his breath something about how tight and good it feels when you squeeze him like that and it's so much. You finish loudly, clinging on his body for dear life and the feeling of his body being firmly pressed to yours while he continuously thrusts his hips into you makes you so light headed, like you have just been drinking.

He made you see those goddamn cliche blurry stars under your eyelids as you came.

And even when his thrusts become erratic, he manages to hold you tight, holding you up a little foe better access and you can't think of nothing else when he cums, moaning half loudly and crashing you into his chest.

And you just can't think about the fact that he came inside; it's so profane. You feel his cum slipping down your tights as he slips out, still breathing to your neck and that husky 'fuck' make you bury your face even deeper into the crook of his neck.

It was one night stand. It's as simple as that.

You happily let him use you as he wants it and now it's kinda hard to think about it. Especially knowing that you were careless enough to let it go without a condom.

Children are not being made with a first try. Hopefully.

Yet it all goes away with his soft kiss that you feel on your cheek and light touches of his fingertips on both of your sides. He is so gentle now. It barely breaks your heart; and when he makes you look at him, you are dying as he smiles ever so calmly, pecking your lips shortly and moving your hair away from your face.

- Don't make that face as if I am trying to run away, - Jiwon's smile is so fucking reassuring you are so determined to believe him, - The only place I want to run to is bed and you are absolutely going with me.