it was 4 am and you were leaving minjeong's penthouse, your hood pulled up around your head to hide the many crimson marks she'd left littered across your neck and chest. your fingers tightly clutched the laptop that minjeong gifted to you during your first official meeting.

"education is important, sweetheart. take it. it's the least i can do."

minjeong always gave you pricey gifts under the guise of it being the 'least' she could do. coming from a background that was wildly different than hers, it took a while for you to get used to expensive things being the least.

as you stepped out into the quiet, dimly lit street, the cool early morning air sent a shiver down your spine. the weight of the thick, black coat you wore reminded you of the generosity of the woman you had just left behind. minjeong, with her elegant demeanor and enigmatic smile, had captivated you from the moment you met her.

you groaned, rubbing your temples as you looked at the email you received, your semester's tuition due already. "it feels like i just paid this yesterday," you mumbled, your eyes glaring at your phone as if it'd make the payment disappear.

you stood up with a sigh, leaving your bag at the table to place your order at the counter. "just a small tea and milk bread, please." the cashier nodded, pushing buttons on the register before reaching a hand out for your card. you passed it to him, silently praying that there was enough left on your card.

"ma'am? it says your payment was declined." you winced at the volume of his voice, your eyes darting around to see if anyone heard.

"i'll pay for her." you looked up to see a woman with shoulder-length brown hair standing behind you, a soft smile on her face.

"no, it's okay," you turned to the cashier, "i don't want anything." before he could respond, she stepped in front of you, holding out her card. you looked down and saw her passing him a sleek, black credit card and your breath hitched. how much money does this woman have?

"careful. it's hot." her words brought you out of your trance as she passed you your tea, her fingers brushing against yours as you took it. you reached out for your bread, but she'd already turned away and made a beeline to a booth in the back of the store. you hesitantly followed her, hoping that this wasn’t some sort of elaborate scam.

"sorry, this might seem odd, but i overheard what you said earlier. about your tuition." your heart started pounding, suddenly feeling embarrassed about a stranger knowing about your financial issues. "i understand if you're uncomfortable with my intrusion," she continued, her voice gentle and reassuring. "but i couldn't help but notice, and i'd like to offer you a helping hand. no strings attached."

you cautiously took a seat across from her, curiosity mingling with skepticism in your mind. "why would you want to help me?" you asked, unable to hide the hint of suspicion in your voice.

the woman's eyes softened, and she leaned forward slightly. "because i've been there," she replied, her voice laced with empathy. "i know how overwhelming it can be to face financial burdens, especially when it seems like they keep piling up. i've experienced my fair share of struggles, and now that i'm in a more stable position, i believe in paying it forward."

her words resonated with you, your heart fluttering at the idea of no longer having to struggle with money. "thank you," you finally said, genuine gratitude evident in your tone. "but how can i repay you?"

"think of it as a way for me to repay you for your passion for higher education. is that okay?"

you nodded, your heart fluttering as you took in the sight of minjeong. despite being in a dimly lit café, her beauty only seemed to intensify, and you couldn't help but feel a surge of nervousness as she held eye contact with you. the aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air, intertwining with the hint of minjeong's intoxicating perfume.

conversation continued between you two, minjeong asking about your expectations, and what you wished to gain from this arrangement.

"of course, i don't mind paying for your education. that's what i'm here for, right?"

from that moment on, minjeong had been helping you with not only tuition but also your rent, although you'd basically already moved in with her at this point. her penthouse was filled with your things, from paintings and vases with colorful flowers to clothes scattered around the rooms.

minjeong didn't mind, and in fact, told you how much she loved that you'd practically made the place yours. before you settled in, minjeong's place almost looked deserted, with barely any decoration adorning the walls.

you unlocked your car, collapsed against the seat, and turned on the heat. the instant warmth that enveloped you was a drastic change from the almost half an hour you'd have to wait for heat in your old car. the day after you picked up minjeong to see a movie, she already had a new car waiting for you with a red bow on top in the carport.

"i couldn't let you drive around in that. you deserve something better."

before you could leave, your phone buzzed and you looked down to see a message from minjeong.

'did you leave yet'

you furrowed your eyebrows, your thumbs hovering over the keyboard.

'no'

'is everything okay?'

she didn't respond for a few more minutes and you started to get worried, and shut off the car, prepared to go check on her before your phone buzzed again.

'yeah'

'can you come back up'

"i just left," you mumbled, your eyes starting to feel heavy reminded you of how early in the morning it was.

'minjeong?'

you watched the message bubbles appear and disappear repeatedly until she eventually sent the message.

'i can't sleep without you'

you smiled, your heart fluttering at the thought of minjeong still thinking about you, even after you left. you caught yourself smiling and quickly dropped it. you'd realize sometimes that you're thinking too fondly of her, occasionally smiling to yourself when she plagues your thoughts, which seems like it's on an everyday basis these days.

you jogged back towards the building, speed-walking through the lobby and back to the elevator. you punched in the penthouse button, scanning the card that minjeong gave you as the elevator started its ascent.

once you reached the top level, the doors could barely even open before you saw minjeong appear on the other side. she was standing in an oversized shirt and shorts with a pout on her face before she grabbed your arm, pulling you inside.

"sorry about that. i should've just asked you to stay instead of waiting," she mumbled.

you couldn't help but feel a mixture of amusement and affection at minjeong's pouting expression. her slightly disheveled appearance only made her more endearing in your eyes. you shook your head, trying to suppress the smile tugging at your lips.

"it's alright, minjeong. i don't mind coming back at all," you reassured her, your voice soft. "i'm happy to be here with you."

minjeong's pout faded, replaced by a soft smile that quickly faded into an indescribable expression. she didn't respond and instead led you further into the penthouse, her hand still holding onto your arm as if you'd turn around and leave any moment. the air was filled with a sense of familiarity, the scent of her perfume mixed with your own wafting around the rooms.

as you settled into the comfortable bedroom, minjeong gestured for you to sit on the bed while she headed into the closet. "i'll get you a change of clothes, hold on."

you nodded and watched as minjeong disappeared into the closet. the room seemed strangely quiet, and a wave of unease washed over you. you couldn't help but wonder why minjeong's expression had shifted so suddenly. had you done something wrong?

lost in your thoughts, you absentmindedly toyed with the hem of your coat, your mind replaying the moments you had spent with minjeong. the intimacy you shared, the way she made you feel special, and the genuine affection that seemed to bloom between you—it all felt too good to be true. you found yourself longing for more from her, even if you didn't want to admit it.

moments later, minjeong returned with a fresh set of clothes for you. she handed them to you without a word, her eyes avoiding direct contact. you felt a pang of anxiety in your chest, the weight of the silence becoming almost unbearable.

"i hope these will fit," she finally spoke, her voice lacking its usual warmth. "you can change in the bathroom."

confused and slightly worried, you took the clothes from her, carefully making your way to the bathroom. as you closed the door behind you, you leaned against it, trying to steady your racing thoughts. something was definitely wrong, and you couldn't shake off the feeling that something bad was going to happened.

slowly, you changed out of your clothes, the unfamiliar tension in the room making even the simplest tasks feel heavy. when you emerged from the bathroom, dressed in the fresh clothes minjeong had provided, you found her sitting on the edge of the bed, her gaze fixed on a distant point.

"minjeong, what's going on?" you asked softly, your voice tinged with concern. "you seem… upset."

she let out a sigh, her shoulders slumping. finally, she met your gaze, and the vulnerability in her eyes made your heart ache. "i think we need to talk," she said, her voice laced with sadness.

a sense of dread settled in the pit of your stomach. you slowly approached her, sitting down next to her on the bed. "talk about what?"

she opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out, her jaw visibly clenching. "actually, can we talk in the morning? i'm really tired right now."

"minjeong."

"please," she looked at you, almost pathetically, her eyes pleading with you to drop it. you sighed, walking around her room to tuck yourself into the right side of the bed. you felt the bed dip as she laid on the other side, feeling her eyes on the back of your head before she pushed her arm under your head, her other hand coming to rest on your torso.

"i'm sorry," you barely heard, her voice not even an octave above a faint whisper.

you woke up the next morning to no sign of minjeong. not even the faint smell of her perfume lingered in the air.

"minjeong?" you called out, sitting up from the bed and looking through the doorway to the kitchen, hoping you'd see her there. you stood up, walked out of the bedroom, and looked all over the house for her, your heart pounding once you realized you'd looked everywhere.

you sat down on the couch, your hands slightly shaking as you laid your head against the arm of the couch. "fuck, she probably knows."

"i know what what?"

you jumped up, startled at the sudden sound of a voice. "minjeong? when'd you get here?"

you turned around to see minjeong standing by the entrance of the living room, her eyes filled with concern as she observed your distressed state. relief washed over you at the sight of her, the worry in your heart beginning to subside.

"i've been here the whole time," she replied softly, stepping closer to you. "i heard you calling my name. everything alright?"

you let out a breath you hadn't realized you were holding and walked toward her, your steps cautious but filled with a mix of relief and confusion. "i… i thought you were gone. i couldn't find you anywhere," you explained, your voice wavering slightly.

minjeong's expression softened, and she reached out to gently cup your face with her hands. "i'm sorry. i didn't mean to worry you," she said sincerely, her thumbs brushing against your cheeks. "i needed some time to gather my thoughts, and i didn't want to burden you."

a mix of emotions flooded through you—relief, understanding, and a touch of lingering unease. you leaned into her touch, feeling the warmth of her hands against your skin. "i'm glad you're okay. but minjeong, please remember that i'm here for you. you can talk to me," you reassured her, your voice filled with genuine care.

minjeong's eyes softened, gratitude evident in her gaze. "thank you, sweetheart. i appreciate your understanding."

"also, what did you want to talk about last night?" minjeong's eyes hardened at your words, before it was gone almost without a trace, a gentle smile taking its place.

"nothing. it was silly." you looked at her, part of you wanting to press her about it, but the other part scared to bring it up in case it upset her again. "by the way, i found a newly built bathhouse earlier that we could go to. if you're interested, of course."

you raised an eyebrow. "bathhouse? i thought you hated those?"

"i do. but i know you like them." you nodded, smiling at her.

"i'd love to."

you lay down in one of the hot rooms, the steam enveloping your bodies as you both sought solace and relaxation. minjeong's arm served as a makeshift pillow behind your head, providing comforting support. the heat from the sauna seeped into your skin, creating a soothing sensation amidst the tense atmosphere.

as the minutes ticked by in silence, the weight of minjeong's words lingered in the air. you could sense her restlessness, her desire to address the topic that had been weighing on her mind. it was clear that she wanted to talk about something, and the uncertainty of it all made your heart pound in your ears.

minjeong's question stayed in the back of your mind, the weight of unspoken feelings lingering between you. but at that moment, as the steam swirled around you and the gentle sound of water echoed in the background, you both made an unspoken agreement to set aside that conversation for now.

instead, you decided to embrace the present moment and enjoy the tranquility of the bathhouse. the soothing heat of the sauna enveloped your body, relaxing your muscles and melting away any tension. you found solace in the simple act of being together, the unspoken understanding between you becoming a comforting presence.

as you reclined in the sauna, minjeong's arm still resting behind your head, you allowed yourself to fully immerse in the serene atmosphere. the sound of your steady breaths intertwined with the soft murmurs of other bathers, creating a sense of peacefulness.

occasionally, your eyes would meet, and a shared smile would pass between you, a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken bond you two shared. words were not needed in that moment, as minjeong's eyes held the emotions that she could not express.

in the bathhouse, time seemed to lose its meaning. minutes molded into hours as you moved from one relaxing room to another, your conversations never about any serious topics. the hot springs, the cold rooms, and the aromatic steam rooms gave you relaxation that the both of you needed.

you relished in the intimate moments, the stolen glances, and the gentle touches that spoke volumes without the need for words.

as the day continued, and the bathhouse began to quiet down, you found yourselves back in the soothing embrace of the sauna. the warmth of the room cocooned you, making you forget about minjeong's words. at least, for now.

you leaned against minjeong's side, her presence both making you nervous, but also comforting. as you closed your eyes, a contented sigh escaped your lips, and a peaceful silence enveloped you both. in that moment, it didn't matter that the conversation about your feelings remained untouched. you assumed that she opted for showing you, not telling you.

"should we go home now?" you nodded, picking your head up from minjeong's shoulder. the two of you walked back to the locker room, enveloped in a casual conversation about dinner. "hey, can you go to the grocery store and get us some rice and pork belly? you can take the car, i'll call a driver."

"of course," you replied, a gentle smile on your lips. the thought of preparing a meal together felt comforting and familiar, and it could also be a way to finally get minjeong to say what's been on her mind lately. "i'll go to the one right down the street."

leaving the building, you made your way to the car and drove to the nearest grocery store. after you reached the parking lot, you sent minjeong a text.

'is there anything else you want'

you waited for a response before you went inside until about 5 minutes had passed and she hadn't responded. you tried to ignore the sinking feeling in your chest, putting your phone away and entering the store. as you shopped around for what you needed, you also picked up a few snacks from the shelves. "this looks like something minjeong would eat," you mumbled to yourself, putting random items into the cart.

you looked down at your phone again after you reached the register, hoping to see a response from her, but she still hadn't responded. with the groceries in hand, you returned to the car and began the journey back home. you tried to ignore the nervousness you felt, trying to only focus on the idea of making a meal with minjeong.

however, as you arrived at the penthouse, a sense of unease washed over you. you hesitantly stepped inside and realized, once again, minjeong was nowhere to be found, and the usually inviting atmosphere felt empty and devoid of her presence. a sinking feeling settled in the pit of your stomach.

walking past the living room, your heart sank further when you found a note left behind on the kitchen counter.

my love,

i couldn't find the words to tell you in person, so i'm telling you here. it hurts me to write this, maybe even more than you, but i've made the difficult decision to leave.

please understand that my intentions were never to cause you pain. you have brought immense joy and love into my life, and for that, i am eternally grateful. but there are emotions within me that i have been battling with, emotions that i find myself unable to express—to fully understand.

in our moments together, i have felt feelings that i have never experienced before. the way you touch my heart, the way you see into the depths of my being, it both exhilarates and terrifies me. and it is this fear, this overwhelming sense of vulnerability, that has made me decide to leave.

please know that my decision to leave is not a reflection of you or our relationship. it is a reflection of my own inner struggles, and my own need for clarity. i need time for myself, to find the courage to open up to you in a genuine way.

i’ve paid the rest of your tuition, and left some money aside for you in case you choose to further your education. you’re free to stay here as long as you want, but in case you don’t—in case the memories here are too much to bear, i’ve paid your rent for three years.

i hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me, to understand that this is not a rejection of our love, but rather a painful step towards growth. i promise you, with every fiber of my being, that i will return when i am ready to share my heart completely and when i can give you the love and honesty that you deserve.

please take care of yourself, my love. hold onto the memories we have shared, and know that my absence is not an absence of love, but a necessary journey for us both. you have touched my soul in ways that words fail to capture, and for that, i will forever be grateful.

yours truly,

minjeong.

"y/n, i can not do that!" aeri snorted, shoving your shoulder.

"why not," you pouted. "just gently close the door on my finger; just enough to sprain it." she sighed, rubbing her temples.

"you know you can just go talk to her, right? you don't have to hospitalize yourself for her attention."

"it's not that simple ri, and you know that." she shrugged, her eyes analyzing your own dejected ones.

"if you're not gonna talk to her, there's not much more advice i can give you." as she opened her mouth to speak again, you heard a ping from her phone. "fuck, i'm sorry. my mom wants me back at home for god knows what." she leaned over, pressing her lips to your forehead. "talk to her!" aeri shouted as she left your room.

you sat in silence once you heard the front door slamming shut, your fingers tracing the threads of your blanket. is it worth it to try to talk to her?

your mind wandered back to the last few months, which you mostly spent thinking about jimin. memories flooded your thoughts, painting a vivid picture of the moments, albeit short, you had shared with her. the stolen glances when she came to visit your parents, the meaningless small talk that lingered in your mind long after they ended, and the undeniable connection you felt whenever you were together.

you recalled the night you spent talking for hours, exploring the depths of each other's thoughts and dreams. the way her laughter filled the room, filling your chest with butterflies. the way she listened, truly listened, to every word you spoke, making you feel seen and understood. those moments were irreplaceable, and they held the promise of something more. at least, that's what you wanted to believe.

doubt crept in, questioning whether those moments meant as much to her as they did to you. what if she didn't feel the same way? what if she only viewed you as an immature child? the fear of rejection pricked at the back of your mind, making you hesitate.

letting out a sigh, you shook your head, closing the curtains to block out the sun. you climbed into your bed and tucked yourself underneath your covers. if jimin wanted to see you, she would've come by, or at the very least called.

as you lay there, the sound of aeri's words echoed in your ears. "talk to her," she had urged, her voice filled with certainty. aeri knew you better than anyone, and you always valued her opinion. but the thought that she may not feel the same way held you back, its grip tightening with each passing moment.

a soft buzz from your phone caught your attention, the light illuminating the dark room. with a hesitant hand, you reached for it, unlocking the screen to find a text from an unfamiliar number.

'Hey, it's Dr. Yu.'

'Can we talk, please?'

you found yourself frozen, staring at your phone, your thumbs hovering over your screen. despite wanting jimin to text you first, you couldn't help but feel a little resentment towards her. not only did she ghost you for months, but she walked out on you with no explanation, other than essentially saying you were ‘too young’ for her. so why does she want to talk now?

'jimin?'

'how'd you get my number?'

you picked at the skin on your fingers, debating how you wanted to respond to her messages. you didn't want to sound too eager, but you also didn't want her to think you had no interest anymore.

'Your father gave it to me.'

'I told him you wanted to speak to me about neuroscience.'

you wanted to respond. you really did. but you didn't know what to say, and especially how to say it. despite trying to play it off, jimin made you nervous, and months without talking to her only made it worse. while you were lost in thought, your phone buzzed in your hand again.

'Y/N, please talk to me.'

'I'm sorry about what I said last time. I didn't know how to say what I wanted to say.'

'Just one more chance. Then you never have to see me again.'

as much as you wanted to hate her for disappearing the way she did, something inside of you wanted to give her a second chance. you wanted to see where this could go, and if there was a possibility that she could feel the same way you did.

'alright'

'come over tonight'

you were pacing around your room in your pajamas, squeezing a stress ball in between your fingers. you were thinking about dressing up for her, but you didn't want your parents to get suspicious. your mom already raised an eyebrow at you when she saw you taking a shower twice today, but fortunately, she didn't comment on it.

you felt your stomach sink as you came to a sudden realization. not only would your parents hear jimin coming from a mile away, but they would also immediately know who it was. you could already hear your dad interrogating you as to why dr. yu was coming over in the late hours of the night.

you walked over to your phone to text her, and you were interrupted by the sound of a car door closing. you leaned over and peeked through the blinds, only to see jimin stepping out of a discreet black car, parked right outside of the driveway. once her eyes met yours, she flashed you a smile and pointed toward her car.

you felt a mixture of excitement and nervousness as you hurriedly grabbed your jacket and opened the door. adrenaline rushed through your veins as you silently tiptoed down the stairs, hoping to avoid drawing any attention from your parents. opening the front door, you stepped outside and made your way to jimin's car, heart pounding in your chest.

as you got into the car, jimin reached over to give your hand a reassuring squeeze before starting the engine. "you okay? you look nervous," she spoke as if nothing had happened. as if no time had passed.

"you wanted to talk." you felt a pang in your chest when you saw the hurt look on her face.

"y/n, i apologize for the way i treated you last time we met. i shouldn't have walked away that night, and i definitely shouldn't have disappeared for so long. forgive me?" you looked over to jimin, watching as a growing smile spread across her face. you couldn't hate her.

"i guess. but if you do it again, i promise you'll never get another chance." jimin laughed, reaching over to rub your knuckles with her thumb.

"trust me, i won't need a second chance." you felt butterflies when you heard her words, turning to stare out of the window, hoping that she doesn't see how flustered you are. "also, how'd your parents let you leave out so late? your dad seems pretty protective of you."

"jimin, i'm eighteen. i don't need their permission to leave." jimin snorted, shaking her head.

"your dad barely wanted to give me your number this morning." she looked over to you, smiling at your exasperated expression. "you're right, you're an adult. i'm sorry."

you chuckled softly, appreciating jimin's lightheartedness. the tension that had built up within you began to dissipate as the ride continued, conversation flowing between the two of you like no time had passed. it felt good to be in jimin's presence again, to feel the familiarity and connection that had drawn you to her in the first place.

jimin continued to guide the conversation, telling you about random events that happened in her life in the time you'd been apart. "and then the other intern, who was also scared of blood by the way, left the exam room mid-surgery." she scoffed, seemingly still upset about the situation. "i mean, can you believe that? an upcoming doctor who's scared of blood?"

she shook her head as she parked the car, tapping her fingers along the steering wheel, seemingly deep in thought. you looked around to see you two were parked atop a hill, a dim light from behind the fence slightly illuminating the cabin of the car. "y/n, i know i messed up, and i'm truly sorry for the pain i caused you. i don't want to make empty promises, but i want to show you that i'm committed to making things right. can we start over? take things slowly and see where this goes?"

you took a moment to process jimin's words, feeling a mixture of hope and wariness. her sincerity was evident, and you couldn't deny the lingering feelings you had for her. even though you wanted to protect yourself from getting hurt again, something about jimin's words made you believe her. after a deep breath, you met her gaze.

"of course, we can start over." jimin's eyes flickered between your eyes and your lips, hesitation evident from her hand hovering mid-air. "kiss me, jimin." she leaned over and pressed her lips to yours, her hand coming up to rest on the back of your head. she held onto you as if you'd disappear any second, her other hand trailing up your thigh. her fingernails gently traced shapes on your inner thigh, the hand on the back of your head moving down your neck. she pulled away, her eyes dark and her chest heaving.

"y/n. i don't want to pressure you or force you into anything. are you sure this is okay?"

"this is more than okay jimin, i promise. i've missed you so much." she held your gaze as you watched multiple expressions dance across her face; uncertainty, desire, nervousness.

"backseat."

you groaned as you woke up to your phone ringing, looking at it through squinted eyes to see the name aeri on screen.

"aeri? what's up?"

"hey, sleepyhead. did i wake you up? sorry, i just wanted to check in on you. how did things go with jimin?" you frowned, suddenly waking up at her words.

"how'd you know i saw jimin?" she laughed, and you could see her smug expression through the phone.

"you didn't text back all night. and i saw the way you looked when i suggested you talk to her."

"it went well. for now, we're just taking it slow but i truly think things are different this time."

"as long as you're happy, y/n. if she hurts you again, i swear…" you laughed as aeri trailed off, her protectiveness endearing to you. the call ended, and you smiled thinking back to the events from last night.

jimin took you home and snuck you in through the back door, kissing you goodnight and walking back around the house to get back to her car. she waited until she saw the light come on in your room, followed by your eyes peering through the blinds. you watched as she left, her car disappearing into the night. as you climbed back into your bed, your mind buzzed with thoughts of jimin. the taste of her lips lingered on yours, and the warmth of her touch still tingled on your skin. it felt like a dream, yet the reality of it made your heart flutter.

as time passed, you and jimin spent more and more time together, and you felt like she was genuinely trying to make up for her actions, even though you'd already forgiven her. although you didn't want to admit it, you'd already forgiven her the night she walked out.

"i love you so much, jimin," you mumbled into her chest as you two lounged on her couch. a movie was playing in the background, yet you were hardly paying it any attention and opted for observing jimin's features.

"i know." you scoffed and hit her chest, looking up at her only to see a playful smile that reached her eyes. "i'm joking. i love you too, y/n."

you knew that navigating this relationship would be difficult. between the differences due to the age gap, and knowing your parents would never approve of it, you couldn't help but feel slightly disheartened. what if she found you too immature and decided to break things off? or what if your parents found out and you couldn't see jimin anymore?

while you were starting to doubt your relationship, jimin leaned over you, pressing a kiss to your temple. her hand came up to rub your back, gently patting you as if she were soothing a baby to sleep. in this moment you realized, no matter what happened, you'd be fine as long as you had jimin by your side. and you knew that even if you were given the chance to start over from the beginning, you'd choose her every time.

you trudged up the stairs, away from "your" party, which consisted of your parent's friends, and not a single one of yours. you let out a relaxed sigh as the bass of the music became less and less noticeable in your chest. pushing open the door to your bedroom, you let your foot close it behind you and fell onto your bed.

"this is not how i expected my 18th birthday to go," you groaned into your pillow, grabbing your phone and turning on your side, fully expecting to spend the rest of your day here and not downstairs. your parents wanted you to make connections with some of the people for your "future", but that was the last thing on your mind today. not only did you not want to spend your evening with tens of middle-aged adults, but you also wanted an escape from reality, without having to think about your future too much. at least for today.

while you were lost in your thoughts, you heard the loud rev of an engine, and you stood up from your place on the bed. leaning over your nightstand, you peered through the blinds and watched as a sleek, matte black sports car pulled into your driveway. you stared intently at the driver's side door as the purr of the engine rattled in your chest, reminding you of the bass faintly vibrating from downstairs.

your fingers were frozen in place as you held the blinds open, watching as a platinum-blonde woman stepped out of the car, running a hand through her hair before tying it in a ponytail. you felt as if you were starstruck, watching her adjust her clothes, before she laughed, removing the stethoscope from around her neck. you were almost in a trance-like state, and although you couldn't hear her laugh, you imagined it was the most beautiful sound you'd ever heard.

it seemed as if she'd just left her shift at the hospital, still having on the same scrubs and work shoes that nurses wore. once she felt that she was presentable enough, she reached into the backseat and pulled out a light blue gift box with a white bow on top, using her hip to nudge the door closed.

heart pounding, you stumbled backward, the sudden movement causing the blinds to drop back into place. your mind raced, trying to process the unexpected arrival of this captivating woman. who was she? what was she doing here? and most importantly, why did she have a gift for you?

curiosity tangled with apprehension as you peeked through the blinds once more. the woman had begun made her way to the front door, her steps powerful, yet graceful at the same time. with each passing moment, your intrigue grew, overpowering your initial shock.

you debated whether to remain hidden or confront her. the desire to meet her moved you forward, and with a sudden surge of courage, you hurriedly left your room and padded down the stairs. the distant sounds of laughter and conversation from the party came and left as your mind focused in on the enchanting woman at your doorstep.

you reached the front door just in time to see her positioned to knock, her hand hovering in mid-air. it was now or never. swallowing your nervousness, you opened the door, revealing a surprised expression on her face.

"hi," she said, her voice as smooth as silk. "i'm dr. yu. i apologize for my tardiness, but i was told there's a very special girl here having a party for her very special birthday?"

you couldn't help but be captivated by her piercing gaze and the genuine warmth in her smile. "yes, it's my birthday," you replied, feeling a surge of excitement and curiosity at her gift.

dr. yu's eyes sparkled with amusement. "happy birthday!" she exclaimed, holding out the gift box she had been clutching. "i know we haven't met before, but i'm a close friend of your parents. i've heard a lot about you, and i thought it was only right to put a face to the name.”

you became more flustered at her words as you accepted the gift. "thank you," you stammered, caught off guard by the unexpected gesture. "that's very kind of you."

dr. yu's smile widened. "it's the least i could do. birthdays should be special, and i wanted to make sure yours didn't go unnoticed."

as you stood there, speaking with dr. yu, a sense of familiarity washed over you. perhaps this encounter was the escape you had longed for, a break from the monotony of your party. a break from the constant concern over your future. you found yourself drawn to her presence, yearning to know more about her.

with a sudden burst of spontaneity, you mustered the courage to invite her inside. "would you like to come in? it's quieter inside, away from the crowd," you offered, hopeful that she would accept.

dr. yu's eyes crinkled with a mixture of surprise and delight. "i'd love to," she replied, a hint of curiosity in her voice. "lead the way."

you shuffled through the crowd, hoping to quietly lead her away from the seemingly ever-growing party to her room. as the stairs were in your line of sight, your dad stepped in front of you.

"y/n! i see you've met jimin." jimin eyes snapped from the back of your head, and looked over to your father.

"she really is a lovely girl. you've raised her well," jimin's dark eyes did a once-over of you, making you feel slightly exposed, while simultaneously making your heart race.

your heart skipped a beat as jimin's gaze lingered on you. the intensity in her eyes sent shivers down your spine, a mix of excitement and nervousness flooding your senses. you tried to maintain your composure, feeling slightly flustered as they both looked at you expectantly.

"thank you," you managed to reply, your voice betraying a hint of unease. it was as if jimin's presence had the power to unravel your carefully constructed facade, leaving you vulnerable and exposed.

your father's smile widened, oblivious to the tension between you and jimin. "i'm glad you two met. jimin here is a renowned neurosurgeon at the hospital. she's been a close friend of ours for a long time."

you struggled to find the right words, your mind racing to process the information. jimin, a neurosurgeon? the charming woman who had appeared at your home in an expensive sportscar was not only captivating but also held a respected position in society. the realization only deepened your sudden fondness for the woman.

"i'm honored to meet you, dr. jimin," you said, your voice filled with genuine admiration. "thank you for the birthday gift. it means a lot."

jimin's eyes softened, her gaze lingering on you for a moment longer than necessary. 

"the pleasure is mine," she replied, her voice laced with a subtle undertone of something you couldn't quite decipher.

jimin's words hung in the air, leaving you with a sense of intrigue and curiosity. there was something about her presence that captivated you, a pull that drew you closer. as your father excused himself to attend to other guests, you and jimin stood there, locked in a silent exchange of emotions.

feeling a mix of nervousness and boldness, you gestured for jimin to follow you. leading her through the bustling party, you managed to navigate the sea of people and find your way back to the staircase. the distant sounds of laughter and music gradually faded into the background as you climbed the steps, guided by the dim glow of the hallway lights.

reaching your room, you pushed the door open and stepped inside, inviting jimin to enter. the room brought you back to your senses, making you feel calmer than before, like a sanctuary away from the chaos downstairs. you motioned for jimin to take a seat on your bed while you settled into your desk chair, facing each other.

the atmosphere felt charged with anticipation as you observed jimin. her blonde hair sat on her shoulders, framing her face and accentuating her features. her eyes sparkled with intelligence and warmth, and the subtle curve of her lips hinted at a gentle smile.

"dr. yu," you began, breaking the silence, "jimin. i didn't expect my birthday to turn out this way, but i'm glad you decided to come. it feels like a nice break from everything."

jimin's smile widened, her eyes never leaving yours. "life has a way of surprising us, doesn't it? sometimes the most memorable moments come from the unexpected."

you nodded in agreement, a growing sense of warmth bubbling up in your chest. there was a natural ease in the way you conversed as if you had known each other for much longer than a few moments. unlike the rest of your parent's friends, jimin never once made you feel like an unintelligent child in her presence. you felt as if you could talk to her about anything, and she'd never make you feel judged for it.

curiosity burned within you, urging you to learn more about her. "so, jimin, tell me about yourself. how did you become a neurosurgeon?"

a soft chuckle escaped her lips, and she leaned back, her gaze shifting to a distant point as she dove into her story. jimin recounted her journey of dedication, hard work, and passion that led her to pursue medicine. she shared stories of the challenges she faced, the lives she touched, and the fulfillment she found in her profession.

as jimin spoke, you found yourself hanging on to every word, drawn to the obvious passion she had for her career and the empathy that she held through the way she spoke of her patients. her passion for making a difference in people's lives made you feel more attracted to her than before, as you felt a smile spread across your face while she continued.

in turn, you shared your aspirations, dreams, and the uncertainty you held about your future. you talked about your love for the sciences, your yearning for independence and exploration, and the weight of expectations that sometimes felt suffocating. it was as if the barriers you had built around yourself crumbled, allowing you to open up and reveal the deepest depths of your heart and mind. some that you didn't even know existed.

hours seemed to slip away unnoticed as you exchanged stories, laughter, and shared experiences. the conversation flowed effortlessly, weaving a web of connection between the two of you who had found solace and understanding in each other's presence.

eventually, as the night grew late, you both realized that the party downstairs had quieted down. the house was enveloped in peaceful silence, the remnants of laughter and happiness lingering in the air. jimin's gaze met yours, an unspoken question passing between you.

"thank you for spending this time with me," you said softly, breaking the momentary stillness. "tonight was better than anything that could be in that box."

jimin chuckled, her hands reaching behind her to grab the box. she pushed it into your hands expectantly. you looked up at her and she nodded, gesturing for you to open it. you ripped the paper from the box, opening it to see a red leather box with gold letters engraved on the top. "jimin! i can't take this! how much did you spend on this?"

"don't worry about it, birthday girl. this is your special day, and it won't come again, so enjoy it while it lasts,” she smiled warmly, gently lifting the lid as your eyes settled on to a small silver necklace with two interlocked rings on the end. you lifted it from the box, the weight of the metal leading you to believe it was even more expensive than you'd originally imagined.

wordlessly, jimin took the necklace from your hands, leaning over you to clasp it behind your neck. your breath hitched at the proximity, feeling jimin's warm breath hitting your bare skin. her fingers trailed down the necklace, her eyes never leaving yours. your eyes flickered between hers and her lips, your own slightly parted, almost anticipating something.

"happy birthday," she mumbled, before you pressed your lips to hers, her hands eventually coming up to gently hold your waist. you moved back and looked up at her, looking for confirmation, her eyes half-lidded and her gaze almost unreadable. you pulled her back in for another kiss, lacing your arms around her neck, she grunted as you pulled away, pressing your forehead to hers, giggling at the surprised look in her eyes.

she playfully rolled her eyes, her hands trailing down from your waist to your thighs as you drew her in for a sloppy kiss, your gift box hitting the floor with a light thud. she hooked her fingers underneath your thighs, maneuvering you onto her lap as she deepened the kiss, her hands caressing your back.

"jimin? y/n?" you heard your dad call out. jimin jolted from her position on your bed as if she'd been physically hurt, forcing you to push yourself from her lap and onto the bedsheets behind you.

"y/n, i'm so sorry. shit," she mumbled, running a hand through her hair, the same way she did when she was standing by her car. two complete scenarios, yet you still feel the same rush you did the first time.

"don't apologize, jimin. you didn't do anything. i wanted this." she shook her head, picking up the discarded box from the floor, and letting out a deep sigh.

"y/n, i'm just," she ran her fingers through her hair once more. "this isn't right. not only are you my colleague's daughter, but you're nearly ten years my junior. jesus christ..." she trailed off as the realization hit her, her teeth starting to chew on her lip.

"jimin, i promise you didn't do anything wrong! i mean, i initiated it, and i'm eighteen!"

"yeah, barely!" she let out a huff, tucking the box under her arm. "i'm sorry for raising my voice, y/n. please understand where i'm coming from." she gave you one last look, like a puppy in a kennel before leaving your room. you stared at the space where she once was, feeling as if you were about to throw up. you couldn’t decipher if it was from the adrenaline from her kiss, or the feeling that you’d never meet someone else like her again. just as she'd come, like an angel in disguise, she left, leaving an empty feeling in your chest.

you heard the front door open and close moments later, and you moved into the same position you'd been in earlier when you watched her arrive. she looked up at you and gave you a small smile, waving her hand in your direction. you held your hand up between the blinds as an act of acknowledgment, as if your heart wasn't being shattered as you watched her walk away.

she started up the car, the roar of the engine feeling almost familiar to you at this point, and wasted no time before pulling out of the driveway and speeding down the street. you heard the door creak open and turned around to see your dad standing in the doorframe, a warm and comforting smile adorned on his face. "you like jimin's car too, huh? it caught everyone's attention tonight. i almost thought a lion was in our driveway," he joked, and you could barely find it in yourself to muster up a smile.

"yeah, i like her car."

you sat in the corner of your practice room, gripping the tablet in your hands as your four other members huddled around you to watch the choreography. it was a critical moment for you and your group, as you were only a day away from your comeback performance. the pressure was high, and everyone knew that every single move had to be perfect and precise.

as the music started, you closed your eyes and tried to focus on the beat. the choreography was complicated, and you had been practicing for months to get it right. but something was still off. the timing was a little off, and some of the moves didn't flow as smoothly as you thought they should.

you opened your eyes and looked at your members. they were all staring at you, waiting for your feedback. you took a deep breath and attempted to voice your concerns.

"okay, let's try that again. yujin, your timing is off on the second chorus. hyerin, your footwork needs to be a little sharper. and jia, you need to extend your arm a little more on the bridge."

your members nodded in understanding and got back into position. you started the music again, and this time, everything was seemingly perfect. the moves flowed together seamlessly, and the timing was on point.

as the music ended, your members collapsed onto the floor, exhausted but clearly satisfied with their work today. a huge contrast to how you were feeling.

you blew out a puff of air, walking backward to sit in a chair with your head in your hands. as the leader, you felt pressured to make everything perfect, from the dance to the lyrics. it was your job.

"y/n? are you okay?" you heard your member, rei, ask with concern. you looked up at her and forced a smile.

"yeah, i'm fine. just a little tired."

but you knew that wasn't the truth. you were stressed out and worried that your group wouldn't be able to pull off the comeback performance. it was your responsibility to make sure that everything was perfect, and you felt like you were falling short.

as you sat there, lost in thought, your members gathered around you. they sat in silence for a moment, unsure of what to say. then, jia spoke up.

"y/n, we know how much pressure you're under. but we're a team, and we'll get through this together. you don't have to carry all the burden yourself."

you looked at her, feeling grateful for her words. your members had always been there for you, supporting you through thick and thin. and you knew that they were right. you didn't have to do this alone.

"thanks, guys," you said, feeling a weight lifted off your shoulders. "let's take a break for now and come back to this later. we'll get it right."

the five of you sat in chairs backstage, the room silent as your members stared at the floor. you had a wardrobe malfunction on stage where your mic had detached from your pocket, slipping from your grasp and under yujin’s feet. even though she regained her balance shortly after, you couldn't help but feel that the damage had already been done.

your leg bounced nervously as you looked through your group's mentions on twitter. while you scrolled through the tweets, your heart sank. fans were already talking about the incident, and some had even uploaded videos of it happening. you could feel your heart racing as you read comments about how unprofessional it was and how it ruined the entire performance.

your members sat quietly beside you, their eyes occasionally flickering towards you, reflecting the same disappointment and worry. you knew that they were all thinking about the same thing—about how this would affect your group's image and reputation. it was a critical moment, and this mistake could cost you everything.

suddenly, the door to the backstage area burst open, and your manager rushed in, her face tense. "are you guys okay?" she asked, looking at each of you in turn. "i’m glad you didn’t hurt yourself out there, that was a close call."

you nodded, feeling a little relieved that at least she didn't seem too upset about the wardrobe malfunction.

"but we have to do damage control," your manager continued, her voice low. "we need to release a statement addressing the issue and assure fans that yujin’s okay."

your members nodded, and you all sat in silence once again, lost in thought as your manager left the room. you knew that this was just the beginning, and there was a lot of work to be done to make things right since your group were still considered rookies.

as you sat there, your leg still bouncing nervously, you felt a pit in your stomach. you knew that no matter what you said, there would be people who wouldn't understand or accept your apology. but you also knew that you owed it to your fans, who had supported you all since debut, to address the situation and let them know that you were okay.

after a few moments of silence, you spoke up. "i think we should do it now, before it gets out of hand," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. your members looked at you, and then at each other, before nodding in agreement.

over the next few hours, you worked with your team to draft a statement that addressed the situation, apologized for any harm caused, and reassured your fans that yujin was okay. you all poured your hearts into the statement, wanting to make sure that it conveyed the sincerity of your apologies.

once the statement was finalized, your manager took a deep breath and hit "send" on the post. it was immediately met with a flurry of reactions—positive, negative, and everything in between.

your fans were confused as to why you were apologizing in the first place, while non-fans didn't seem to accept the apology. you read comments about how your careless mistake jeopardized your group's success, and about how you could’ve harmed yujin. you couldn't help but feel discouraged, but you also knew that you had to keep going. you couldn't let the negativity overwhelm you.

so you took a deep breath, put on a brave face for the sake of your group, and turned to your manager. "how are we gonna come back from this? i mean," you gestured to the tablet propped on the table, "this isn't going to look good for our group's image. especially after the debut we had."

your manager sighed, tapping her fingers on the arm of her chair as she tried to come up with a solution. all of a sudden, she jumped from her chair, grabbing her bag from the floor. "i know just the person who has experience with this sort of thing. y/n, follow me."

"y/ln y/n, this is hwang yeji, the best producer the industry's seen in years." yeji held out her hand, which you quickly took into your grasp. although yeji wasn't an idol, you still felt starstruck.

you sat in awe as yeji began to speak, feeling intimidated by her presence. "don’t worry. you’re not the first one something like this has happened to," she explained. "one mistake can ruin an entire group if it's not handled correctly. fortunately for you, i promise it's not the end of your career."

yeji proceeded to lay out a detailed strategy that involved a combination of online and offline initiatives. she suggested hosting fan meetings, doing more social media interaction, and even creating a charity project to show your group's commitment to giving back to the community. yeji had a reputation for saving rookie groups from controversy, and you trusted her expertise.

"also, we could try testing out a different style for your next single. something that not only draws more international attention but something that also makes people proud to see how far you guys have come." you slowly nodded your head, your mind still not grasping the fact that you'd finally met someone who you'd looked up to for years. "is that okay with you? if not, we could try something else."

"no! it's fine. i'm sorry, my mind is just everywhere right now." yeji smiled, her hand coming up to caress your thigh.

"don't worry about it. i understand that this is pretty difficult to handle. i'll get you, and your group through this. i swear."

yeji stood up, looking over to your manager who was furiously typing on her laptop, her eyebrows furrowed. "you don't mind if i take y/n to the studio, right?" she waved her hand in a dismissive gesture, before going back to typing. "great! come with me. i'll show you a few different styles, and you can pick out which ones you like best. not today, of course, so don't feel rushed."

as you followed yeji out of the room, you couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable thinking back to her touch. it seemed a bit too forward, but you brushed it off, thinking that maybe it was just her personality.

yeji led you down a hallway illuminated with bright led lights, her hand resting on your back to guide as you walked. once again, you tried to ignore it, focusing on the different doors you passed by. finally, you arrived at a door that read "studio 5".

yeji pushed open the door, revealing a large room filled with equipment and musical instruments. "welcome to my studio," she said, gesturing for you to enter. "take a seat, and i'll play you some of my recent work."

you sat down on the couch, feeling a bit nervous as yeji disappeared behind a frosted glass door. a few moments later, music began to play, and you were struck by the unique sound. it was unlike anything you had ever heard before, and you found yourself nodding along to the beat. you knew that if you decided to use it for your group, it'd at least get points for being unique.

as the music continued to play, you found yourself feeling entranced by the sound. you barely even noticed when yeji came back out from behind the curtain, sitting down next to you on the couch.

"i'm glad you like it," yeji said, a smile on her face. "i think it could really work for your group."

you nodded in agreement, still lost in the music. yeji's hand came to rest on your knee, causing you to jump slightly.

"you're tense," she said, her hand rubbing circles on your knee. "relax, i'm just trying to help you."

you tried to ignore the uncomfortable feeling in your stomach as yeji's hand moved higher up your leg. you didn't want to be rude or offend her, but you couldn't shake the feeling that something was off.

"i think I'm going to go now," you said, standing up from the couch. "thank you for showing me the studio and the music, but i should let everyone else know what's going on."

yeji's smile faltered for just a moment before she stood up as well. "of course, i understand. i'll email you the sample so the others can hear it. let me know if you need anything else."

you quickly made your way out of the studio, feeling a sense of relief as you stepped out into the hallway. you couldn't help but feel like something was off about yeji's behavior, but you didn’t want to jump to conclusions just yet.

you stepped inside of the conference room, your eyes scanning around to see if your manager had made it back yet. "so? don't leave us hanging, what happened?" yujin spoke up, bringing you out of your almost dazed-like state.

"oh! uh, yeji has a song for us." your members leaned in expectantly, almost hanging on to your every word. "it sounds really good! she's gonna email it to us, and you guys can hear it. i think this'll definitely have an impact, a good one, on our career."

the girls erupted into cheers, pulling each other into a group hug, despite their happiness, you couldn't help but feel uneasy. you shook your head, laughing to yourself. yeji isn't a bad person. you were just overreacting.

you sighed, twirling your pencil around in your fingers. you were sitting in yeji's studio, annotating lyrics while you waited on her to show up. your members had already listened to the song that she sent, and everyone agreed that it was a good kind of different.

as you were lost in thought, the door to the studio opened, and yeji walked in. you smiled at her, but something about her demeanor seemed off. her eyes were fixed on you, and she was already standing much too close for comfort.

"hey, y/n," yeji said, her sounding slightly irritated. "i'm sorry to keep you waiting."

"it's alright," you replied, trying to shake off the strange feeling in your gut. "i was just working on some lyrics."

yeji walked over to you and stood behind the couch, her hand resting on your shoulder. "let me see what you've got so far," she said, leaning in close to your side.

you hesitated for a moment, before handing her your notebook. as she flipped through the pages, her hand lingered on your shoulder, and you felt a shiver run down your spine.

"these lyrics are great," yeji said, her voice dripping with approval. "but i think we can make them even better. why don't we work on them together?"

she leaned in closer, and you could smell the faint scent of her perfume. it was intoxicating, and you found yourself getting lost in her gaze.

"sure," you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

yeji took a seat next to you on the couch, her body close enough to yours that you could feel her body heat. as you worked on the lyrics together, she would occasionally reach out and brush against your arm or your thigh. at first, you didn't think anything of it, but as time went on, her touches became more frequent and lingering.

you started to feel slightly uncomfortable, but you didn't know how to bring it up to her. yeji was your mentor, and you didn't want to offend her or ruin your working relationship. you didn't want to lose this opportunity. for your group's sake.

as you finished up the lyrics, yeji stood up and walked over to the recording booth. "let's give these new lyrics a try," she said, motioning for you to follow her.

you got up and followed yeji into the booth, taking your place at the microphone. you watched as yeji set up the recording equipment, adjusting the levels and checking the sound quality.

as you began to sing, you felt yeji's eyes on you, and it made you feel self-conscious. you tried to ignore her gaze, focusing on the lyrics and the melody, but every so often, you would catch her gaze lingering on you.

when you finished recording, yeji came over to you, standing close enough that you could feel her breath on your neck. "you have such a beautiful voice," she said, her hand coming up to brush a strand of hair from your face.

you smiled nervously, feeling more uncomfortable by the second. "thank you," you mumbled, feeling suffocated by her presence.

yeji leaned in closer, her lips hovering just inches from yours. "you know, y/n, i've always thought you were special," she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

your heart raced as you tried to think of a response. yeji was your mentor, but her behavior was making you feel uneasy. you felt like a deer in headlights.

suddenly, yeji's hand was on your waist, pulling you closer to her. "you wanna see how special you are?" she whispered before gently pressing her lips to yours.

you were frozen for a moment, unsure of what to do, before pushing her away. "yeji, stop," you said tried to say assertively, but it came out almost like a question.

she looked at you, her expression changing from desire to confusion. "what's wrong? don't you want this?" she questioned, her hand still on your waist.

you shook your head, taking a step back. "yeji, this isn't right. you're my producer, and i could get in a lot of trouble for this."

yeji pouted, taking another step towards you. she tapped on her microphone, holding it out for you to grab. you hesitantly took it, your eyes tracing over her name engrained on the side of it. "you want to be successful right?" you nodded your head, meeting yeji's gaze.

"you don't want the career that your groupmates have worked so hard for to go to waste, do you?" you shook your head, your eye contact with yeji faltering with the intensity of her look.

yeji's words sent a chill down your spine. she was right. you didn't want to jeopardize your group's career, but at the same time, you couldn't ignore the feeling of discomfort that had settled in your stomach.

"i just… i'm not sure about this," you muttered, your grip on the microphone tightening.

yeji stepped closer to you, her hand reaching out to cup your cheek. "you're so talented, y/n. i know we can create something amazing together, both in the studio and out of it."

her words made your heart race, but you couldn't tell if it was in a good way or not. you knew what she was implying, yet you weren't sure if you were making the right decision.

yeji leaned in closer, her breath hot against your ear. "trust me, y/n. i'll take good care of you."

the way she said it sent shivers down your spine, and you found yourself leaning into her touch. she was so confident, so sure of herself. and deep down, you knew you wanted to be a part of whatever she had in mind.

you let out a shaky breath, nodding your head in agreement. "okay, yeji. i trust you."

a smile spread across yeji's face, and she leaned in to press her lips against yours. it was a soft, gentle kiss at first, but soon it deepened, and you found yourself responding eagerly. "you'll do great. i promise."

"y/n!" you turned to the direction you hear your name being called, waving at a group of people with signs with your group's name on it. one person emerged from the crowd with a microphone, a cameraman following closely behind them.

"i heard you guys have a song coming out soon. any words on that?" the interviewer held their mic towards you, eagerly waiting on your response.

for the first time, you found yourself being confident when speaking about your upcoming release.

"hi! it's so great to see all of our fans out here today," you said, gesturing to the crowd behind them. "and i'm so excited to talk about our upcoming song, which will be releasing next month. it's really something special, and i think it's something that our fans have never heard before."

the interviewer leaned in, looking intrigued. "can you tell us a little more about the song? what makes it so unique?"

"well, first of all, we had an amazing team working on this song, including some really talented producers like hwang yeji. she brought such a fresh perspective to the project and really pushed us to try new things. and i think the result is a song that blends together elements of different genres in a way that's really unique and exciting." you beamed, praying that your words didn't reflect how nervous you truly were on the inside.

"wow! hwang yeji produced the song? i'm sure you guys were in good hands!" you chuckled nervously, your eyes darting away from the camera. was that an innuendo, or were you reading too into it?

the interviewer laughed, seemingly oblivious to your internal turmoil. "definitely sounds like a song to look out for! thank you so much for taking the time to chat with us today, y/n. we can't wait to hear you guys’ new song!"

you nodded, awkwardly smiling back at them as you ducked your head to step into the car. you looked down at your lap, toying with the ends of your shirt. you did this for your group. so why do you still feel guilty?

"y/n? is everything alright?" you looked up to meet the eyes of hyerin.

"yeah! everything is fine. i'm just nervous about the reaction our song might get. that's all."

hyerin nodded understandingly, "i know it can be nerve-wracking, but i have a feeling our fans will love it. and if they don't, it's okay. we'll keep making music and improving with each release."

you nodded, grateful for hyerin's reassuring words. as the car pulled up to the building, you gathered your things and stepped out. yeji was waiting for you in the lobby, her eyes lighting up when she saw you.

"y/n! how was the interview? i'm sure you did great," she said, her smile warm and genuine.

you smiled back, feeling a wave of relief wash over you. maybe yeji wouldn't bring it up this time. "it went well, thank you. how about you? how's everything going with the music video?"

yeji's expression turned serious, and you couldn't help but feel a twinge of unease. "actually, there's been a bit of a setback. the director had to pull out due to personal reasons, and we're trying our hardest to find a replacement."

"that's unfortunate. do you need any help with finding a new director?"

yeji's eyes lit up, "actually, that would be amazing. do you have any recommendations?"

you thought for a moment, trying to think of anyone who made have director experience. to be honest, you’d probably be the least helpful person in finding a director, but your nervousness around yeji led to you offering help. “i can ask my manager, if you’d like? she should know what to."

as you spoke, you couldn't help but notice the way yeji was looking at you. it was almost as if she were a predator looking at prey, but you brushed it off, telling yourself that you were just being paranoid. again. "i'll let you know as soon as i hear back from her," you added, trying to steer the conversation away from yeji's intense gaze.

"thank you so much, y/n," yeji said, her voice soft and low. "you know, you've been such a huge help to us lately. i really appreciate it."

you felt yourself become flustered, suddenly feeling uncomfortable under yeji's scrutiny. "oh! thanks but it's nothing, really. i'm just glad to be able to do this for the group."

"by the way," she motioned for you to follow her, "i have another song i feel fits your group. for the future, of course. if you're willing to hear it?"

you hesitated for a moment, unsure if you wanted to be alone with yeji again. but you didn't want to seem rude or ungrateful, so you nodded and followed her into a nearby empty practice room.

as yeji set up the song on the speakers, you couldn't help but feel nervous. you weren't sure if yeji genuinely wanted you to hear the song, or if she had ulterior motives.

the song started to play, and you found yourself surprised by how good it was. the melody was catchy, the lyrics were meaningful, and the production was top-notch. you couldn't help but feel yourself get lost in the beat.

"this is amazing, yeji," you said, genuinely impressed. "i could definitely see us performing this."

yeji grinned, her eyes lighting up. "thank you! i'm so glad you like it. i've been working on it for a while now, and i really wanted to get your opinion on it."

you felt a sense of relief wash over you after hearing yeji’s words. she did just want genuine feedback. maybe it was just a one-time thing. "it sounds great! i have no doubt the girls will like it too. when should we start recording?"

yeji's smile faltered slightly, and you wondered if you had said something wrong. "actually, that's why i wanted to talk to you," she said, her voice taking on a more serious tone. "i was hoping you could help me with the finishing touches."

you raised an eyebrow, unsure of what she meant. "what do you mean?"

yeji hesitated for a moment as if trying to find the right words. "well, i was thinking…you have such a good ear for music, and you're so talented. i was hoping you could help me with producing some elements for the song."

your heart skipped a beat. this was not what you were expecting. you had no experience in producing music, and you didn't want to get in over your head.

"i don't know, yeji," you said, trying to keep your voice calm. "i don't have any experience in producing. i don't want to ruin it or anything."

yeji's expression softened, and she stepped closer to you. "don't be so hard on yourself, y/n. you're an amazing producer. don't let the hate get to you. and besides, i'll be there every step of the way to help you."

you wanted to say no. you wanted to run out of the room and never look back. you never wanted to have to put yourself in such a vulnerable position again. but something about yeji's gaze, something about the way she was looking at you, made it impossible to refuse.

"okay," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. "i'll help you."

yeji's smile was blinding, and she pulled you into a tight hug. "thank you so much, y/n. you have no idea how much this means to me." you wrapped your arms around yeji, shivering as she buried her nose into your neck.

"let me show you. show you how much this means to me."

you felt your breath hitch, pulling back to look at yeji. she looked at you with an expectant face, waiting on your next move. you never, ever, wanted to see the comments you saw during your first comeback.

"okay. show me."

Nighttime is the best time to cry. You'd come to this realization after many times of Yunjin walking in on you sobbing, followed by her pulling you into her arms to comfort you. Many times of Yunjin begging you to tell her the reason for your tears, and many times of you wishing she hadn't heard you at all.

Her comfort usually included you sitting in her arms for hours, not you, nor Yunjin daring to utter a single word. Once you'd finished sobbing, only quiet sniffling coming from you, Yunjin's hands would come up to hold your cheeks. She'd tenderly wipe away your tears, pressing a kiss to your eyelids, before leaning down to capture your lips.

"You're so pretty like this, jagi." You looked up into Yunjin's eyes, her soft gaze holding nothing but tenderness. You leaned forward, burying your face into her chest. Yunjin sighed, looking down at your figure curled into her side.

She'd spent so many nights watching you weep from behind corners, and it was only in her own selfishness that she found herself unable to prevent herself from being the reason for your tears.

Yunjin had grown accustomed to seeing you this way, her body moving on autopilot the moment she saw tears forming in your eyes. Yunjin assumed that she enjoyed comforting those close to her, until the day she walked into a study room and found one of her close friends in hysterics. Unlike how she felt with you, her heart sank to her stomach, her mind going blank as she tried to figure out the appropriate response to the situation.

As much as she tried to deny it, Yunjin realized that the only reason she felt this way is because she felt like you deserved better than her. She wants to make you cry, hoping that one day you'll use your better judgment and find someone better. Despite this, Yunjin couldn’t bring herself to leave you. As much as she truly wanted the best for you, she couldn’t help but be selfish, at least once in her life, and keep you to herself.

"Jen? What's wrong?" You were looking at her with a worried gaze, your fingers clinging to her sleeve.

"Nothing, don't worry. We have class in the morning, so don't stay up like you always do," she playfully scolded you, her fingers poking your sides. She stood up from her place on your bed, grabbed her phones and charger, and walked over to lean against your doorframe.

"I'll walk you to class in the morning. I love you, sweet dreams."

Your fingers tapped on Yunjin's bedroom door which was across from yours as you looked down at your phone. "Yunjin? Our class starts in eight minutes." You stood outside her door, waiting on a response. After a moment of not hearing anything, you pushed open her door, peeking your head inside.

You looked around the room, realizing that Yunjin had already left. Her bed was made perfectly, and you realized that she'd left at least 10 minutes ago because her alarm's snooze timer was still counting down. You frowned, leaving her room and speed-walking towards the door, hoping you weren't too late for class. While you fumbled with the key to lock the door, you thought back to Yunjin's words last night. Why would she say she'd walk you to class if she wouldn't?

You dragged your feet to class, feeling your chest start to burn, thinking about Yunjin's many empty promises to you during the time you two were dating. It started with simple things that could pass as mistakes, like promising to bring dinner home, or promising to buy you something you had your eye on for a while.

Her empty promises only grew more significant from then on. She'd promised to pick you up from class for spring break since both of you had the same hometown. You sat outside of campus after class ended, your bags tucked under your arms and your suitcase leaning on the wall beside you.

After about ten minutes of waiting, you heard footsteps and looked up to see one of Yunjin's friends. "Hey!" She looked up from her phone, smiling as she recognized who was trying to get her attention.

"Y/N! What are you still doing here?"

"I'm waiting on Yunjin to pick me up. I thought she'd be here by now..." you trailed off, holding your hand above your eyes like a visor and looking around. She gave you a perplexed look, pointing towards her phone.

"To pick you up? Yunjin left this morning already. I assumed she already told you." You stared at her phone like a deer in headlights, looking at Yunjin's text which read 'made it to niskayuna' an hour ago. "I could drive you if you'd like?" You shook your head, waving your hands.

"No, it's fine. I don't want to inconvenience you!" She apologized for Yunjin's behavior, which it'd seemed like everyone could do but her, before getting into her car to head home for the break. You huffed, pulling out your phone and dialing your mom, which was the last thing you wanted to do.

"Y/N, are you okay? Don't tell me it has something to do with that Jennifer girl."

You vowed to never put your trust in Huh Yunjin again.

"Y/N, please don't start this shit again," Yunjin groaned, resting her cheek on her palm. You looked up at her in disbelief, shaking your head.

"Yunjin, are you kidding me? This was our 200th-day anniversary, which you promised you'd take me out to dinner for."

"And out of those 200 days, how many of them do you think we spent together?" Yunjin's tongue toyed with the inside of her cheek, a tell-tale sign that she was irritated.

"What are you trying to say, Jennifer?"

"I'm trying to say that we spend almost every day together, so why's today so important to you?" You scoffed, feeling tears welling up in your eyes at Yunjin's words. You watched as her eyes softened, her hands reaching out to grasp your shoulders. "I didn't mean it like that."

She reached out towards you before you pulled away like her touch was an open flame. She huffed, moving to sit in front of you on her knees. She extended her hands towards you once more, to which you reluctantly placed yours in hers. "I wasn't implying that today wasn't important to me. I was trying to say that every day is a special one as long as you’re here."

You playfully shoved Yunjin's shoulder away from you, feeling flustered at her words. She pulled her sleeve over her wrist, taking your chin in her fingers and gently wiping away your tears.

"Why does it seem like I always end up crying when you're around?" You joked, your mood changing to a more serious one as you watched Yunjin's demeanor change. Her hands stopped wiping your tears and her back became more rigid as she leaned away from you. Although you were joking to begin with, the way Yunjin reacted made your heart sink. "Jen, I was kidding."

Yunjin shook her head, toying with the hem of her pants while she stared at you, her gaze intense. "I know. But I also think you deserve to know this as well." She suddenly broke eye contact, opting to look at the wall behind you.

"It's true—you do cry a lot more when I'm around. And I take full responsibility for that. Recently, I've felt like I needed to push you away; to push you away before you do the same to me. I know you deserve better, and I want you to have better than me."

"But there's still a small part of me that wants, no, needs you to stay. Even though I know there's better people out there, I want to be that better person for you. I swear I'll make it up to you."

You smiled, your hands coming up to wipe Yunjin's tears that'd begun unknowingly dripping from her eyes. Grabbing your arms, she pulled you into a tight hug—one that felt genuine for the first time in a long time. "I trust you. This is your last chance, Huh Yunjin, don't waste it." She grinned, her fingers poking your sides.

"I wouldn't dream of it."

"Yunjin, it's cats here!" You exclaimed, pointing over to the colony of cats that were huddled around a small heater. She moved to stand behind you, grabbing your bookbag by the hook and slinging it over her shoulder. You shuffled over to the cats on the balls of your feet, slowly extending your hand out to pet them. The cat tentatively sniffed your fingers, before rubbing the length of its body along your hand, purring softly.

Yunjin cleared her throat, causing the cats to scatter from the area. "Yunjin!"

"Sorry, but it's cold. And I wanna go home," she whined, passing your bag back over to you. You sighed, looking back over to the direction that the cats ran off to. Not seeing any cats after thoroughly scanning the area, you turned back to Yunjin with a huff.

"Let's go, you big baby." You two walked back to the dorm in semi-comfortable silence, Yunjin's thumb rubbing the back of yours. You shook your head, realizing the only reason you feel uneasy is because Yunjin is never this quiet. Pushing away your thoughts before you started overthinking, you took out the key to the shared dorm.

You walked into the room, slinging your bookbag on the couch, and went to your room before collapsing on your bed. You felt yourself slowly drifting to sleep until Yunjin entered the room, placing your bag by the door. "I'm going to take a shower and head to bed now. I love you, don't forget that." She pressed a kiss to your forehead as your eyes fluttered shut, too tired to say anything other than a quiet, slurred 'i love you too'.

A few hours later, you were jolted out of your sleep, realizing that you never got ready for bed properly. You slid your jacket off of your shoulders, laying it across the back of your chair. Grabbing the pajamas from the edge of your bed, you quickly slipped them on before leaving the room to find Yunjin.

"Jen?" You called out to her, getting no response in return. You peered around the corner into the bathroom, in which the mirror still had a fresh coat of condensation on it. You felt your heart start to pound as you walked to Yunjin's room, pushing the door open to see nothing but a mattress and a bed frame in the center. Your vision started to get blurry as you found it hard to breathe, your eyes focusing on a neon pink sticky note on the side of the mattress.

Rushing over to read it, you snatched it from its place, shaky hands gripping the note as the ink from her pen started to bleed from your tears dripping onto the page with realization.

'i love you, y/n. and i swore that i'd be that better person for you, even if it means letting you go'

From the moment you saw Karina in an advertisement on a busy street, you were immediately drawn to her. Thereafter, you began attending all of their concerts, media showcases, and even their airport departures, even if to stand in the back of the crowd and take pictures. You were infatuated with her, watching every single piece of content with her in it. You felt your days slowly being consumed by her, spending every waking moment of your life keeping up.

Although you knew that this level of infatuation wasn't healthy, you endured it, even if just for a moment of happiness. "Jesus Christ, Y/N. Have you really been sitting here all day waiting on Aespa's comeback?" Your closest friend, Gyuri, muttered as she walked into your apartment. You glanced at her as she opened up your refrigerator, letting out a sigh as she closed it. "You didn't even touch the soup I made..." You huffed, scratching the bridge of your nose.

"Sorry, Gyu. You know how important this is to me though. I've been waiting months for this. They also have a QR Code that we scan before the show starts, and I could get a free ticket to their fan sign! Isn't that exciting?" You beamed, taking glances back at the screen to check the timer. You looked up at Gyuri as she shrugged, before falling on the couch cushion beside you.

"I guess that's worth it," she emphasized, glancing over to the stacks of albums that you bought, hoping to win a fan call with Karina. "But I don't think the rest of this stuff is worth it. Nor do I think it's awfully healthy." She paused, taking a quick look at you. "But I guess if it makes you happy." You didn't respond as you heard music start playing from your TV, and your head snapped to see what was going on. You watched as Aespa did their introduction greeting, and your eyes were immediately drawn to Karina.

Once they began talking about the QR Code that we would be able to sign, you quickly pulled your phone out and aimed it at the screen, hoping the faster you caught it, the higher your luck would be. You chewed on your lip as you stared at the screen, groaning when you realized that you would have to wait until after the show is over to get the results.

Gyuri chuckled at your reaction, before standing up and stretching. "I'm leaving now. Text me later if you finally get lucky after all these years," she joked before kissing you on the forehead and heading out of the door.

Although you'd usually be over the moon during any Aespa performance, you couldn't help but feel impatient as you waited for the ending to reveal who won. To take your mind off of it, you walked over to the kitchen and prepared some snacks to eat during the performance.

After what felt like hours of watching their show, it finally got to the end and you quickly opened your browser to see, "Congratulations! You've won the AESPA fan sign tickets!" You gasped, standing up from your seat. You muttered no way under your breath, sending a quick screenshot to Gyuri. You opened your phone and scrolled down to Ryujin's contact number, pausing for a moment before you chose to call anyway.

"Y/N?" You heard her tired voice come through the phone speakers.

"I got the fan sign tickets!" You rushed out, hearing Ryujin's exhausted groan on the other line.

"Y/N, that’s great and all but you remember what I said, right?" You rolled your eyes, despite her not being able to see you. Ryujin, and many others, told you that Karina was bad news, but you couldn't be bothered to listen. Even if she was, it wasn't like you would actually have a chance with her, so it didn't matter to you anyway.

"I know, I know. You've told me a million times. But it's not fair you get to know her and I don't." You whined, pulling the phone away from your ear as Ryujin snorted.

"Yeah, that's why I'm telling you, Y/N. Because I know her, and you don't. I know how she is and how she treats people, and I don't want that to happen to you." You heard someone in the background call Ryujin over, telling her that break time is over. "Listen, Y/N. For my sanity and your safety, don't get involved with her. I love you." That was the last thing you heard before she hung up and you couldn't help but feel your excitement die down after her words. She couldn't be that bad, right?

You stood outside of the venue, your bag clutched tightly in your arms, and you looked around at everyone who seemed to be just as nervous. You thought back to Ryujin's words, becoming paranoid, wondering if they were true. What if she's mean? You bounced from leg to leg, moving forward with the rest of the line. Shaking the thoughts out of your head, you tried to remember what you were going to say to them when you made it to the front.

"Nervous?" You looked to your right and saw a girl with a camera pointed toward one of the members. You nodded, before quickly saying 'yes' after you realized that she wasn't looking at you. "Is this your first time?"

"Yeah. You?" You asked before you heard her chuckle.

"Not at all. I'm at just about every one of their events. For photos, of course." She zoomed in on the camera a bit, before taking a picture. "One word of advice though, don't try to remember a pre-written script. Just go with the flow, it'll make it more natural. Plus, you'll probably forget it, anyway."

Once you reached the front of the line, you realized that she was right. You didn't remember anything that you planned on saying. You sat down in front of Ningning, watching as her face morphed from a smile to a shocked expression. "I've seen you before!" She exclaimed, staring at you for a second before her expression changed to one of realization. "You're that one Karina fan page on TikTok, right?" You nodded, opening your album photobook to her page.

"Yeah! You've seen my page before?" She scoffed, looking down at the book as she wrote something down.

"Who hasn't? Winter just sent us one of your videos earlier, she'll probably recognize you." You were speechless, not knowing how you should respond to her words. You didn't expect any of them to see the videos you made, let alone see enough of them to recognize you. When the next person moved, you stood up, giving your goodbyes to Ningning before you sat in front of Winter. When you sat down, you saw Winter's face light up before she addressed you using your TikTok username.

"The video you posted earlier," she trailed off, laughing as she wrote on her page of the book. "Karina's been talking about it all day." You laughed, shaking your head in embarrassment.

"That was probably the worst video for you guys to have seen." She wrote something else on the side of the page before, glancing over to Giselle.

"Maybe not. Karina seemed to have loved it." You stood up and took your photo book from her before you took a seat in front of Giselle. You saw her eyes open in shock when she saw you, her hands pausing as she flipped through the pages.

"I didn't expect to see you here,” she smiled, stealing a glance at Karina. “Karina literally won’t stop talking about your account.” You crossed your legs, scratching your jaw as you felt awkward and put on the spot for some reason.

“Does she really talk about it that much? Ningning and Winter said the same thing too.” Giselle playfully groaned, throwing her head back.

“Anytime she takes out her phone, we know it’s most likely one of your videos.” She paused, glancing up at you before smiling. “No offense, of course. The videos are great, but she’ll talk for hours about them.” You smiled before you watched as her facial expression became serious as she leaned closer to you. “Listen, I didn’t tell you this but if she tries to pursue something with you, don’t trust it.”

“Wait, what-” You were cut off by Giselle sitting back in her seat, giving you a smile that may have seemed friendly to anyone else, but you could tell it meant don’t press any further. You nodded, taking a move to stand up and sit in front of Karina. She smiled as you took a seat in front of her, opening the photobook to her page. She frowned when she looked down, and you followed her line of sight to her page with the outline of her face cutout.

"Do you not like me that much?" You gasped, your jaw dropping when you realized what you had done.

"No, wait! I brought the wrong one! That's the one I use to make posters..." You trailed off when you heard her laughing, and you looked up to see her with the back of her hand pressed to her lips, trying not to laugh too hard.

"I'm kidding," she reached for your hand laying on the table, rubbing her fingers over your knuckles. "I saw the video of you making it." You let out a breath of relief, watching as she observed you for a second before smiling and going to write something on the page. You felt someone's gaze on you and you turned your head to see Giselle staring at you with a disapproving look. You frowned, confused before her line of sight moved down to your hand that was held in Karina's grasp.

You pulled away, giving Karina a smile when she looked up at you. Even though you had just met Giselle today, you felt like you didn't want to disappoint her for some reason. Karina started to pass you the book back before she paused and reached down to take out a sticky note.

She used her hand to cover up what she was writing on it, before discreetly slipping it inside of the pages. Smiling as if nothing had happened, she waved you goodbye as you stood up. Instead of sitting back down to witness the rest of the fan sign, you walked to the back and left through the door that you'd entered, feeling your heart pounding in your chest.

"Gyu, she gave me her number!" You exclaimed, holding Gyuri's shoulders as you shook her shoulders. You observed her as she sat silently with a shocked expression, holding the note between her fingers. You snatched it away, tucking it back into the pages of the book. "Don't memorize it," you joked, watching as she rolled her eyes.

"Maybe I was wrong." She toyed with the end of her sleeve, nervously looking around the room.

“What’s the matter?" You questioned her, watching as her eyes flickered between you and the wall.

"Nothing!" You gave her a knowing look, prepared to refuse to drop the conversation until she told you. "Fine! Ryujin told me that she was probably going to give you her number, and to not let you call her."

"What? Why?" She shrugged, turning to face you.

"I don't know. No one is saying why, but don't you think it's a little weird that everyone's saying she's bad news?" You thought about it for a second, until you realized that you didn't have a rebuttal.

"I mean, I guess they could be right. But shouldn't that be something I figure out for myself? She seemed sweet enough at the fan sign."

"But come on, Y/N. Her actual idol friends are saying she's a bad person. Hell, even her bandmate said the same thing! Don't you think there might be a little truth to it?" You stayed silent, looking back down at the book again. You heard her let out a breath of air, shaking her head. "I can't stop you, but please be safe. And if anything goes wrong, Ryujin and I are always there for you." You nodded, leaning into her hug as she stood up and walked towards the front door, giving you a last glance before leaving.

You took the sticky note out of the page after she left, twisting it in between your fingers. You stared at her number on the page, debating if you should contact her or not. Taking a deep, you typed her number into your phone, sending her a text saying, 'hi! this is y/n btw'.

Before you could even put your phone down, you'd already received a text back that read, 'y/n! i thought you were never going to text'. Your fingers hovered over the letters on the screen, trying to figure out what to say next. Even though you did want to get to know Karina yourself, Giselle and Ryujin's words wouldn't leave the back of your mind. While you were wrapped up in your thoughts, your phone started ringing and you looked down to see that it was Karina calling.

"Hello?"

"Hey. Sorry for calling, but I just wanted to hear your voice again," she timidly said, and you could tell that she was shifting around on her bed. You froze for a moment, being caught off guard by the fact that Karina of all people wanted to hear your voice again. Maybe she isn’t as bad as people might say.

“Don’t apologize! I don’t mind calling.” She let out a breath of relief before she started asking you about the fan sign. You made sure to tell her how much fun you had since it seemed like she was nervous about what you thought of it. “Yeah! Gyuri told me not to call, but I assumed nothing bad could come out of it anyway.” She paused for a second before humming in agreement.

“Gyuri?” You made a noise of confirmation, wondering why she repeated her name.

"Do you know her?" She snorted, a humorless laugh following.

"Nope." You stayed silent for a moment, thinking that she was going to follow up with something else. Although you didn't believe her when she denied knowing Gyuri, it didn't seem like she'd let you in on any more information, so you let it go. You two continued having a conversation for a couple more minutes before she asked you if you were busy tomorrow.

"I'm not busy at all. What about you?"

"Not at all. That's why I wanted to know if you wanted to come to a café with me?"

"Of course! What time?" You confirmed a time and said your goodbyes, turning around and squealing into your pillow.

"So? I'm assuming it went well." You jumped from your position on the couch and turned to see Ryujin standing in your living room.

"How did you get in? You've got to stop doing that," you groaned, fluffing the pillow back into its original position. Ryujin gestured over to Gyuri who was standing by your refrigerator with bags, diligently restocking it. You shook your head, leaning back into a comfortable position on the couch.

"Plus, there's no need to worry. Even if she is a piece of shit-" You were cut off by a clap from Gyuri.

"Language!" You huffed, shaking your head.

"Even if she is a bad person, I wouldn't let her do anything to me." Ryujin and Gyuri shared a look before Ryujin wandered off to the kitchen with an exaggerated, drawn-out sigh.

"If you say so."

You sat on a small wooden bench outside of the café that you and Karina agreed to meet at, absentmindedly picking at the skin on your nails. Despite agreeing with her to meet at 3:00, your nerves got the better of you and you showed up ten minutes early.

While you were lost in your thoughts, a car pulled up in front of the restaurant, stopping in front of you. You looked up as the driver let down the window, making eye contact with Karina who gestured you over.

"Y/N!" You stepped into her car, pulling the door close as you felt yourself become nervous at her presence. "I've been thinking about you all morning."

Before you could respond, she put the car into drive and started leaving the café. "Wait, Karina. I thought we were eating here?" You questioned her, half disappointed because you were starving and wanted to eat before you two went anywhere else.

"We were. But I thought about it and it'd be much better to get to know you in a more quiet place first, then we could start going on dates in public later on." You felt like your head was spinning at the word "date", your eyes glued on the dashboard of her car. "You can call me Jimin too, by the way."

"Not that I mind, but where are we going that's quiet?" Jimin smiled, her finger tapping the steering wheel to the beat of the song softly playing in the background.

"My dorm."

You stepped into the dorm, your heart pounding in your chest. Just yesterday you were winning your first fan sign, and now you're in their dorm. You moved aside as Jimin locked the door behind you two, slipping your shoes off. Walking into their living room, your eyes were drawn to the clothes hanging in front of the wall. You squinted, focusing on an off-white colored jacket. Isn't that Gyuri's?, you thought to yourself, your train of thought being interrupted by Jimin pulling on your sleeve.

"Come on." She guided you down the hall to the room she shared with Ning Ning. You looked around, trying your hardest not to focus on her soft hands wrapped around your wrist. She tugged you into the room, closing the door behind her softly.

"No one's here but us." She smiled, gesturing over to her bed. You sat down, picking at the fibers of her comforter. "Don't be nervous. It's just me." She grabbed your hand that was fidgeting, running her thumbs over it.

"Are you hungry?" She questioned you, nodding her head when you answered. "We only have noodles and leftover gopchang, if you're okay with that."

"I don't mind at all." She walked over to the kitchen, pulling out a pot and pan. While she was filling it up with water, your eyes slowly traced her figure. Even though you already knew she was beautiful from pictures and videos, her visuals seemed magnified in person. While you were zoned out, observing her side profile, she turned around with two packets of noodles.

"Spicy or not?" You pointed to the non-spicy ones, not wanting to embarrass yourself in front of her. She opened the packets of noodles, dumping them into the pot. You turned around and walked over to the table to sit down, rather than ogle at her any longer. You heard the gopchang sizzling in the pan, the rich smell following shortly after.

"Jimin?" She hummed, using tongs to remove the noodles from the water. "Are the others coming back anytime soon?" She shook her head, adjusting her glasses on the bridge of her nose.

"Nope. I specifically told them not to come home because I had a date today." You felt your stomach twist at her words again. Even though this was a dream come true, a dream that many others would never get, you couldn't help but feel nervous. Not only because of the word date again, but also because you couldn't get Gyuri and Ryujin's words out of your head. On top of that, the jacket that looked almost identical to Gyuri's was plaguing your thoughts.

Jimin walked out of the kitchen with your bowl and plate, setting it down in front of you. "I made both of us some so you weren't eating alone." After she sat at the table, you two ate in silence, Jimin stealing glances at you now and then as you tried to ignore them. Once you were finished eating, you stacked the plates and bowls and tried to bring them to the kitchen before you felt a grip on your elbow.

Jimin guided the dishes back down to the table, pulling you back towards her room. "Leave it." Once you two passed the doorway, Jimin closed the door, swiftly locking it behind you two.

"Jimin?" She maneuvered around you, sitting down on the bed before pulling you down onto her lap.

"What?" Her fingers toyed with the hem of your shirt, sliding her hands under your shirt.

"Don't you think this is too fast? Too much?" She looked up at you, her thumbs tracing shapes on your waist.

"Do you want to stop? If you're uncomfortable, we can stop now, and I'll take you home and you don't have to see me again." You chewed on the skin of your lips, your eyes darting around the room.

To be honest, you did feel like you two were moving too fast, but you also didn't want to miss out on what was probably the last time you'd have an opportunity like this. Despite what Ryujin had said, you felt safe in Jimin's arms, and you felt safe knowing that she was giving you the option of leaving.

"No, don’t stop."

"You did what?" Ryujin shrieked, her actions almost fish-like as she searched for words.

"I don't know! It was so sudden but she just made me feel, secure?" Ryujin groaned, rubbing her fingers across her forehead.

"That's what she does! She'll make you feel safe before she reveals her true colors. I already told you this!" You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest. You didn't appreciate the way Ryujin was treating you, the way she'd always treated you like you were a toddler who needed protection.

"Ryujin, I said I'm fine! I swear that if she does something, you'll be the first one to know." She shook her head, running her fingers through her hair.

"You don't get it, do you?"

"Then help me understand!" Ryujin's words began to irritate you, her cryptic behavior confusing you.

"No. This is something you'll have to figure out for yourself." She grabbed her bag from the couch and walked over to the door before turning around to face you. "If anything happens, please don't be scared to talk to us. No matter what we're here for you." She closed the door behind her, leaving you standing in your living room, alone and confused. So, you did the only thing you could think of at the moment, pulling out your phone.

"Jimin? Can I see you?"

You sat in Jimin's car, your phone propped up on the gearshift as you two watched some cliché romance movie to take your mind off of things. Despite you not telling Jimin anything was wrong, she could sense your mood and suggested a movie night, but in the car, since Winter was home. "God, I forgot how much I hate these types of movies," Jimin groaned, taking a bite out of her corndog.

"It wasn't that bad. Maybe a little corny, but aren't most movies these days?" She smiled, her eyes tracing your face. "What?"

"Nothing. You look pretty today." You looked away from her, getting flustered like the day you'd first met. Jimin hooked her pointer finger under your chin, her thumb tracing your jawline.

"Go out with me. On a proper date." You stared at her like a deer in headlights, the sudden confession catching you off-guard.

"Like, a non-quiet place?"

Jimin nodded, laughing at your choice of words.

"Yeah, a non-quiet place." You looked away from her, feeling nervous and put on the spot at her proposition.

"Now?"

"If that's okay with you." You agreed, your fingers playing with the stitching on her seat while she pulled off. Her hand moved from the center console to your knee, rubbing circles over it. Your nerves had calmed down almost immediately, noticeably relaxing into her touch as you stared out of the window. "I've never done this with anyone before. Never felt this way about someone before." Your eyes flickered to hers, her impromptu statement taking you by surprise.

"Never, with a fan? Or with anyone?" She paused for a moment, her gaze intense as if she were blindsided by the question. She turned back to the road, shaking her head.

"With anyone. Idol life is pretty difficult, so I never have time for things like this. But, when I saw your TikTok, I was drawn to you. I wanted to message you, but I thought that was too risky. So, I got you into the fan sign." You looked at her with a puzzled expression.

"What do you mean got me into the fan sign? I won the raffle from the QR code."

"Oh, didn't mean it like that. I just meant that..." She trailed off, her grip on my knee becoming firmer. "It's not important."

"We're here." You walked into the restaurant in a daze from her words, your arm tucked securely under Jimin's.

"What can I get for you two?" The waitress mumbled, dragging her feet over to the table with her head buried in her clipboard.

"I'll get a butter croissant, and she'll take an order of strawberry bingsu," Jimin interrupted you as you started to order. You looked up at her with furrowed eyebrows, your finger still hovering over the menu. How did she know?

The waitress's head shot up as she heard Jimin's voice, her posture immediately straightening. "Karina! I'm a huge fan!" She blurted out, the end of her clipboard coming to rest on the end of the table. Jimin smiled, taking her hands into her own.

"Thank you so much for supporting us. I promise we won't let you down." You watched as a blush spread across the waitress' face, her hand clinging to Jimin's. With a pang in your chest, you turned around to face the window, your dejected expression showing in the polished glass.

The waitress moved to another table by the time you turned around, her eyes flickering back to Jimin's now and then. "Are you okay?" You nodded, quietly thanking the server when he brought out the food for the two of you.

"Sorry to bother you again, but can I maybe get an autograph?" Jimin smiled, taking the paper and pen from the doe-eyed woman.

"Of course. It's the least I can do." Jimin signed the paper, writing something small on the end of the paper before handing it to her again. You watched as the woman's eyes grew wide, a gasp slipping from her lips as her eyes scanned over the note. You scoffed, stabbing your fork into a piece of strawberry.

So much for a great first date.

You silently sat in Jimin's car, your mind racing with thoughts as you thought back to her interactions inside the café. As much as you wanted to believe her when she said she'd never done this with anyone before, it was hard to when seeing how natural she was when flirting. You shook your head, feeling embarrassed by your jealousy.

"Y/N?" You turned your head to face her, realizing that you had already arrived back at your house. "Ah," she trailed off, playing with her fingers as she tried not to make eye contact. You frowned, still holding a slight one-sided grudge against her. "Can we hang out again tomorrow?"

"Jimin, I'm sorry but I don't think this is going to work out. I mean, you're really great, but I don't think... I don't think I'm ready yet," you stumbled over your words, trying not to say the word "uncomfortable".

"What?" Jimin looked at you as if you'd grown a second head like that was the last thing she'd expected you to say. "Are you serious?" You started to feel nervous, her tone making your heart skip. She shook her head, staring at you with an expression that looked like she'd snap at any minute. "You can't just leave like that."

"I didn't say I was leaving, Jimin. I just need more time to think about this."

"More time? Do you know how many people would kill to be where you are right now? Don't pretend like you didn't see what happened in the café."

"You're ridiculous." You turned to step out of her car, before being caught by the wrist and harshly pulled back into the seat. You grunted as your back hit the leather, your arm pulled across the console into Jimin's grasp.

"Y/N, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..." You took Jimin talking as a chance to escape her grasp, opening her car door and bolting towards your front one. You quickly punched in the code, looking over your shoulder to see that Jimin had already left. You ran into your house, slamming the door behind you while you tried to catch your breath.

"What's wrong with her?" Your head snapped up to see Gyuri and Ryujin sitting on the couch, a bowl of popcorn laying across Gyuri's lap. You felt your phone buzzing and pulled it out of your pocket, your heart pumping from adrenaline.

| jimin

y/n

im sorry

i want to apologize

ill give you time to calm down but

meet me tomorrow

please

You made a beeline for your room, feeling like you could burst into tears at any moment. Despite the way Jimin acted in the car and restaurant, you couldn't help but want to respond to her message. You couldn't tell if it was because you genuinely wanted to see her, or if it was because you knew, deep down, that she was right. People would kill to be in your position, and you felt that you couldn't miss out on such a golden opportunity because of something that could easily be a misunderstanding.

You heard a knock on your door, followed by Ryujin entering your room, Gyuri not far behind her. "Y/N, what happened? And don't lie to me, I saw you get out of Jimin's car."

"I don't know. Just something weird that made me feel uncomfortable. But, I'll talk to her about it tomorrow so it's not that big of a deal." Ryujin moved closer to you, her hands coming to firmly hold your own.

"Y/N, like I said, we're here for you. If it's not that big of a deal, just tell us what happened." You took a deep breath, feeling her hands comfortingly caress yours.

"When I was getting out of the car, she grabbed my wrist and pulled me back into the seat. That's all." Gyuri sighed, shaking her head as she looked down at her feet.

"Told you." Ryujin shooed her away, standing up from her squatted position.

"I'll give you some time to process. If you need anything, don't hesitate to talk to me about it." Ryujin slipped out of the door, closing it behind her.

You sat in silence with your thoughts, your mind replaying the incident with Jimin. Jimin seemed like an amazing person, and you didn't want to let what could've been a bad day for her define your relationship forever. You grabbed your phone, your thumbs hovering over the keyboard as you thought of how to respond. You started typing, trying your best to ignore the tingling in your wrist which kept bringing you back to the moment. She wouldn't do something like that twice, would she?

| y/n

its fine

see you tomorrow?

“What about this one?” You asked Yunjin, holding the floral patterned sun dress to your figure. Her eyes surveyed the store for a second before glancing at you.

“It’s alright.” You lowered the dress to your waist, staring at her as she returned to analyzing the store.

“You said that for the last three dresses.” She shrugged, not bothering to turn around to face you.

“The last three dresses looked the same to me.”

“Never mind, it’s fine. We don’t have to do this if you don’t want,” you muttered, hanging the dress back up and walking to the front of the store. You heard her sigh deeply as she followed behind you, coming to a pace that kept her slightly ahead.

"Y/N, you know that if you want us to go out in public together, these are the precautions that I have to take. Could you imagine if someone caught us eating or shopping together? I could lose my job, and you would be known as the student who slept with your professor. Is that what you want?” Yunjin led you to the entrance by your arm as she questioned you. You stayed silent, letting her walk you to the car. Sitting down, you turned to face out of the window away from her. You watched as her eyes traced over your features through your peripherals. “Y/N, listen-”

“I get it, Jen. I know the consequences of being caught. It’s just….” You trailed off, chewing on the inside of your cheek. She moved her hand over to yours, rubbing the back of your hand with the pad of her thumbs.

“This is why I wanted us to spend our time inside. That way, we don’t have to hide anything,” She whispered delicately, continuing to caress the back of your hands. She sighed at your lack of a response, pulling her hands away and sitting back in her seat. “You know what?” You looked at her expectantly.“ We can take a vacation somewhere. Anywhere you’d like. No worrying about anyone seeing us, what do you say?”

“Anywhere?”

“Anywhere.”

You let out a breath of relief, relaxing in Yunjin’s arms as she held you while you two looked over the balcony. “I knew you’d want to come here. Rome has been on your list for how many years?”

“Like four.” You grinned, closing your eyes and relishing the feeling of the sun on your face. She laughed, bringing her hands to your side and gently tracing your arm.

“You look so pretty like this. I love seeing you happy,” she mumbled into your neck, peppering light kisses down to your shoulder. You leaned forward, pulling away from Yunjin.

“Not here, please. Everyone can see us if they look up.” She pressed you into the railing before caging you in with her arms.

“It’s fine, babe. I promised you that there would be no worrying about anyone seeing us, didn’t I?” You peered over the balcony as she brushed her lips across your neck, her hands trailing down from your arms to the inside of your shirt. You twitched as her thumbs grazed your nipples, trying your best to stifle a moan. “Let me hear you.” An airy moan slipped past your lips, Yunjin chuckling against your neck as she moved her hands down and started to toy with the buttons on your shorts.

The denim pooled around your ankles as she tugged on the bow on your underwear, her other hand coming down to caress your stomach. “Can I?” She softly asked, rubbing her finger along the elastic band. You nodded, your attention still being on the people below to ensure you weren’t being watched. She pressed another kiss to your neck before dipping her hand inside your underwear.

“God, you’re so wet,” she mumbled, bringing her fingers to your face and spreading them apart. You watched a thin line of slick stretch between them as she used her other hand to pinch your cheeks with the pads of her fingers. “Taste yourself.” You parted your lips as she slipped her fingers inside, your tongue circling them. She pulled her fingers out and trailed them down to your stomach, pushing her hand under the band of your panties. “I love you,” she reminded you, pressing a sloppy kiss to your neck.

“I love you more.” You could barely finish your sentence before she parted your folds and traced a finger along your slit, her hand’s palm rubbing against your clit. “More, please.” You pleaded, throwing your head back against her shoulder.

“You want more?” She taunted you, kissing the outside of my ear. “Beg.” You huffed, your hips bucking into her hand as she stopped all movement. “Show mommy how much you want her.”

“Please, mommy. Please fuck me. I’ve wanted you so bad,” you whined, rolling your hips into her hand, desperate to feel something.

“Good girl,” she smiled, resting her other hand on your stomach. You felt her slip two fingers back inside of you, the heel of her hand coming to rest on your clit. Once she started moving her hand, the full feeling of her fingers inside of you and the friction on your clit was enough to bring you almost to the edge. "I’m sorry I’ve neglected you for this long, jagi. You can come for me,” she mumbled into your hair, pressing soft kisses into your temple. Your breathing started to pick up, and your legs began to shake as you’d been holding yourself up the entire time.

“Fuck, I’m getting close.” You panted, rolling your head to the side as you buried your face into her neck. You felt her pace quicken as you started to feel your orgasm approaching, her hand running up from your stomach to your chest again.

“I’ve got you, princess. Come for me. You’re okay. Just come for mommy,” she hushed you, whispering soft praises into your ear. "You’re okay.” She softly rubbed your stomach as you came down from your high, pulling her fingers out of your underwear so as to not overstimulate you. You felt your ears ringing as she pulled away from you, turning you around to face her. She smiled as she looked at you, your half-lidded eyes threatening to close and saliva wiped across your face.

“You did so well for me, princess. Let me clean you up.”

The two of you stayed in Rome for the weekend, doing everything you couldn’t back home. “What’d you think, princess?” She questioned you as she loaded the bags into her car and thanked the security who had helped you find your missing suitcase. You gave her a forced smile that didn’t reach your eyes, already beginning to miss the freedom you had in Italy.

“I loved it, but I wish we could be like that all the time.” She gave you a sympathetic look, put your apartment into her GPS, and started the car.

“I know. And I wish I could give it to you because you deserve so much more.” She took your hand into hers, pressing a kiss to the top. “Just a couple more weeks until summer, and we can have three months to ourselves.” You nodded, holding onto her hand as she began driving.

“I love you so much,” you mumbled into her lips as you arrived at your apartment.

“I love you more,” she smiled, shooing you off in the direction of your door. “Get some sleep, and don’t be late for class!” She yelled as you walked towards the door. You shook your head and waved her off before closing the door. You looked at the time on your phone and groaned, falling back onto the couch.

“3 hours of sleep if I go to sleep now.”

“Alright, everyone. Don’t forget your research papers are due tomorrow. Each day they’re late, that’s 15 points off.” Yunjin’s voice echoed around the classroom as she tried to talk over the rest of the students. You sat at your desk, pretending to take a bit longer as everyone else filed out of the room. “What can I do for you?” She questioned you, glancing over towards the door to ensure it was closed.

“Nothing, I was just wondering if I could come over today. I baked you that cake you liked last time.” She sighed, her jaw clenched as she double-checked that the door was closed.

“Y/N, how many times do I have to tell you that we can’t have discussions like this here?” She said in a hushed tone.

“Why not? No one’s in here, and it’s not like bringing you a cake is anything incriminating,” You argued, watching as she stood up from her desk.

“I’m not explaining this to you again. I’m your professor and only your professor when we’re here.” She picked up her bag and stuffed some of her belongings from her desk inside. “I even took you on vacation, to Italy of all places. Do you think that was cheap?” She shook her head, pinching the bridge of her nose as she put her bag on her shoulder. “If you can’t follow the one rule of leaving personal business outside of class, maybe we shouldn’t interact at all inside of campus. I will not lose my job because an ungrateful student doesn’t want to listen.” You stood dumbfounded, confused about what had changed between now and a couple of hours ago.

“I’m not trying to get you to lose your job, Jen. I just wish you wouldn’t treat me the way you sometimes do. Instead of treating me like the rest of your students, you treat me like I’m some sort of nuisance. I’m not asking for special treatment, but I shouldn’t have to keep convincing myself that you love me. For once, I want to feel it.” She scoffed, folding her arms in front of her chest and staring at you with a stern glare.

“I do treat you like the rest of my students. You are no different than the rest, Y/N. The only difference is that we fuck sometimes. Is that what you wanted to hear?” As she said that, you felt a pang in your chest, and your heart began to pound.

“Is this seriously all I am to you? Just a quick fuck?” She groaned, rolling her head to the side as she stared into space.

“You know that’s not what I meant, Y/N. I meant that I couldn’t show any favoritism toward you. I’ve been teaching here for five years; I can’t just give it up this easily.”

“That’s fine, Yunjin. I don’t expect you to lose your job over me. I think it’d be best to end this here before one of us gets hurt.” She stared at me for a moment before shaking her head, her shoulders moving up and down as she chuckled.

“Seriously? Do you want to end it here after one argument? How do you expect anyone else to be as patient with you as I am?” You furrowed your eyebrows, watching as she stared in amusement at your confusion.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means, Y/N, no one else will put up with you the way I will. I was your first everything. I navigated you through your first year of college; I guided you through your first relationship, our relationship. You were a timid freshman with no backbone until I molded you into the person you are today. So no, we aren’t just going to end this here,” she mocked your words, stepping closer to you.

You held back your tears, quickly walking towards the door before you broke down in front of her. Her words still echoed in your head because, deep down, you knew they were true. No matter how badly Yunjin treated you, you knew you’d always end up going back to her. The way she brought you comfort, even though she was usually the reason you were seeking consolation in the first place.

Like always, Yunjin apologized with an expensive gift and dinner, promising to change her behavior. She told you that in two weeks, she’d take you to wherever you wanted to go for three months. “I’m sorry, jagiya. You just frustrate me so much sometimes,” she repeated like a mantra every time you two argued. No matter how badly she treated you, you always returned to her because who else was going to put up with you this way?

“Y/N!” Minji called out, walking around the dorm to look for you. After hearing her voice, you quickly scrambled to stand up, pushing the sheets off of your lap. Hanni raised her eyebrow at your sudden movement, sitting up from her relaxed position on the bed.

“I’m in here,” you replied, your voice having a noticeable quiver. Minji turned the corner, letting out a sigh of relief when she saw you in the room. She looked over to Hanni, her eyes examining the bed where you two were just sitting.

“Can you come with me?” Minji pleaded, walking over to where you were awkwardly standing to grasp your hand. Hanni whined, holding your other arm in her grip.

“But we were watching something!” She exclaimed, tugging you back down on the bed. Minji gave you a warning look, clearly telling you to diffuse the situation, but you were too scared to speak up.

“Just let me borrow her for a second, bro.” Minji pulled your arm again, her hold on your arm beginning to cut off your circulation.

“Hanni, it’s fine. We can always watch something later.” You reassured her, giving her a smile that struggled to reach your eyes. She reluctantly let you go, her expression telling you that she knew something was wrong. Ignoring the part of you that wanted to comfort her, you let Minji pull you toward her room. She closed the door behind you two, holding your shoulders.

“What did I tell you, Y/N? It’s so obvious she likes you!” Minji scolded you, moving her hands to the side with a sigh. “I’m not mad. I just wish you’d spend less time with her. I don’t want her getting the wrong idea about you.” You nodded, taking a step away from her towards the bed. She sat beside you, wrapping her arm around your waist and pulling you closer to her. “I trust you,” she whispered. “Don’t give me a reason not to.” You nodded, relaxing into her touch. Minji pulled away from you and made her way to the door. Holding her arm out, she gestured outside. “You can go back to Hanni now.” You looked up at her nervously, trying to decide from her expression if this was a test or not.

Leaving her room and walking to Hanni’s room, you opened the door and saw Hanni dart back to her place on the bed. “How much did you hear?” She froze for a moment, before shrugging.

“Just the end. By the way, what did she mean by don’t give her a reason not to trust you?” You opened your mouth before closing it, attempting to formulate a response in your head.

“She gets jealous really easily. So…” You trailed off, not wanting to ramble on with too much information just in case it became unbelievable. She hesitantly nodded, patting the bed beside her. You moved towards her, sitting on the edge of the bed to create as much space between you two as possible.

After a few minutes of watching a movie, while paying very little attention to it, you began to feel uneasy. What if it was a test? You jolted up from your spot on the bed, saying your rushed goodbyes to a startled Hanni. You briskly walked into Minji’s room, seeing her sitting at her desk with her computer. “Minji.” Her head whipped around, a scowl taking place on her face.

“Y/N, get out! I was almost done recording my part!” She shouted, standing up from her chair. You froze, like a deer caught in headlights. The last thing you expected was for Minji to be upset at you for leaving Hanni’s room. “What are you waiting for? I said leave!” You backed out of her room, the door slamming in your face the second you crossed the doorway.

“Y/N?” You turned around to see Hyein standing behind you, the rest of the girls peeking their heads out of the room.

“It’s fine.” You blurted out, trying to speed-walk to your room so that they wouldn’t see your tears fall.

“It’s not fine!” You felt a hand catch your sleeve, turning around to see Hanni holding on to you. “This isn’t the first time I’ve heard Minji yell at you like that. What’s going on, Y/N?” She begged for an answer, her eyes wide, almost doe-like.

“Nothing's wrong!" You snapped, immediately regretting it when you saw Hanni flinch. "We're all just really stressed because of the comeback. That's all." You freed yourself from Hanni's grasp, turning on your heel to walk back to your room.

"Whatever! Don't forget our comeback show in the morning!" Hanni shouted down the hall at your retreating figure. You closed the door, letting out a sigh as you pressed your back to the door.

You had already accepted the fact that Minji had never experienced a particularly healthy relationship, which is why she treated you the way she did. The unhealthy mannerisms that she'd absorbed from previous relationships slowly trickled into her current ones as well. Despite this, you felt as if you had some sort of duty to stay with her. It wasn't her fault that she behaved like this. If you didn't put up with it, who would?

"Today's special guest is," the host paused for dramatic effect, even though there wasn't a crowd. "NewJeans!" You guys walked on stage, bowing politely at the staff behind the camera. "So, I heard you guys have a comeback soon. It'll probably be released by the time this is uploaded." 5 heads peeked out from their spots on their chairs, looking down towards the leader.

"We do. I don't want to give any spoilers just in case this comes out first, so I'll just hope you enjoy it when it comes out! We really enjoyed making it!" Minji smiled, holding her hand out toward the camera. That was something you'd always admired about her. The way she adapted to different situations so quickly. Time passed as you guys talked more about the comeback, laughing as everyone tried to avoid spoiling it.

"Haerin!" Her head perked up, looking up at the host. "Do you have anything to add? You've been pretty quiet." Haerin let out an awkward laugh, shaking her head.

"She usually prefers to listen and observe people, rather than speak herself." Minji chimed in.

"...listen and observe," Haerin confirmed, nodding her head, resulting in laughs from the others.

"Despite this, it seems like people enjoy your interactions with Y/N." Haerin nodded, looking over at you with a smile.

"Yeah! It's super entertaining to watch Y/N just ramble on about anything, and Haerin just loves to listen." Danielle interjected. You looked over to Minji, only to see her looking back with an unreadable expression. You turned your gaze back to the host as he started speaking again.

"Anything to say to the Haerin and Y/N fan club?" The host joked, holding an invisible microphone between you two.

"Our relationship is very new, and we've only known each other for a couple of months, but we'll do our best to bring you guys more interactions!" You exclaimed, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, and her hand coming up to complete your half-heart. For the rest of the show, Minji replaced Haerin as the silent one, seemingly deep in thought. Fortunately, the host didn't comment on it.

"Thank you!" The six of you bowed towards the staff, walking outside to the car.

"That was fun!" Hyein sprawled out on the seat in the car. The conversation turned towards being nervous about the comeback, but you couldn't find it in yourself to join in. You felt Minji's cold gaze on the back of your head, while you closed your eyes and pretended to sleep, not being in the mood for any small talk. The car parked at the dorm and you felt as if your heart was going to beat out of your chest like you were a child awaiting punishment from your parents. You reluctantly stepped out of the car, picking your bag up from the floor. Minji stopped beside you, looking up at the building.

"Come to my room." She left no room for argument, briskly walking away from you. You turned to the side to see Hanni looking at you with a concerned expression, to which you gave her a reassuring smile and walked into the building to the elevator.

Once you buzzed yourself into the dorm, you dragged your feet toward Minji's room. "Minji?" You pushed the door open to reveal Minji pacing in the center of the room.

"Not only Hanni but now Haerin too?"

"Minji, it's not like that."

"Then what is it like?" She quickly pivoted on her heels, cornering you in front of the door. "Because to me, it seems like my girlfriend is flirting with two people, that aren't me!"

"Flirting? I wasn't flirting with them! I just made a heart with her, that's all!" She narrowed her eyes at you, stepping impossibly closer.

"And Hanni?"

"What about Hanni?" She grabbed your collar, slamming you against the door.

"Don't play dumb with me!" You looked down, swallowing spit and the lump in your throat. Minji released your collar once she realized the look on your face, taking a step away from you. "Y/N, I'm..." She trailed off, looking up when she heard the front door open. She took a seat on the bed, putting her head in her hands. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, seriously. You know that right?" You nodded, sitting in front of her on the floor. She ran her fingers along the length of your shoulders as if she were trying to erase her previous actions.

"I know. I just wish you wouldn't do it so often." She sighed, sliding off the bed to sit beside you.

"I don't do it on purpose, I promise. I just get so mad sometimes." Whispering, she let her fingers trace the hem of your sleeve. You looked down to where she was gliding her fingers, seeing the hints of a bruise hiding under the fabric.

"It doesn't seem like it at times..." You mumbled, looking up at Minji as her expression changed from one of regret to exasperation.

"Are you seriously suggesting that I do this on purpose, again?"

You chewed on your lip, looking away from her with a shake of your head. As always, Minji was unpredictable. She was difficult to read. One second, she seemed as if she'd change, and by the next, she was already back to her old ways. When she was at her best, it was as if you were on cloud nine. She'd be the best lover you could ask for, very attentive and caring. But when she was at her worst, she'd make you feel like you were doing something wrong by even being near her. You never knew how to please her. What if her behavior escalates? Should you leave?

Looking back up at Minji with tearful eyes, she wiped your tears away with her thumbs, pulling you into her embrace.

"I'm sorry. I'll do better in the future."

It wasn't a question of whether you would stay or not.