Ad Infinitum

How to stop feeling envy?

I wonder why is it so hard for us to admit that we are not okay? Why is it so hard for us to say that we are on the verge of breaking down? All through the years, i’ve learned that it is because we want to be alone when we go through ‘that’ phase of ours. We want to savour the moment, feel the moment, and go through the moment alone. We cover up with ‘i’m okay’ instead of letting people intervene with our problems. We give ourselves time to think and ponder the thought

Up until this day, i’m certain that we are all looking and fighting for our own sanity and peace. Another thing i’m sure about is we will never find it because the universe is fucked up. All we could do is think, hard enough, til we decide to just give up and fight no more. It’s always easier that way.

I want to be alone so bad. I want to be left alone and never noticed. I need to have my own space — to just lay, and be myself and not care about other people. Is this how most introverts feel? I don’t want to be around people not even my family. I just want to vanish.