šš: 18+ SERIES! age gap unspecified but everyone is legal, allusions to smut (in this part), fem!reader, innocent!reader, slight angst, not proof read.
ā this is kinda just an introductory to this 𤨠but this also me testing the waters to see what kind of response it gets. i tried to give it a little more substance instead of just making it controversially young gf smut. but lmk if u only care for the smut fr. aiming for this to be a 3 parter possibly if anyone actually reads. okay bye love u
(be patient with me i do not have a writing schedule D: itās just vibes over here)
there were things in life that demanded to be named. not as a matter of understanding, but as an act of survival. temptation. desire. guilt. words so small they barely held the weight of the emotions they described. words that felt inadequate against the reality of their presence, sharp-edged and infinite. harry had spent years pretending these things were separateādifferent flavors, distinct experiencesābut now, in the quiet spaces between reason and instinct, he realized they were one and the same.
desire wasnāt the sweet fruit hanging low on the tree, waiting for him to pluck it. it was a persistent root that had grown into his bones, twisting through his ribs, wrapping around his heart. temptation wasnāt the serpent in the garden; it was the soil itself, fertile and dark, daring him to plant something reckless.
thou mayest. the illusion of freedom wrapped in the guise of agency. it was a promise of autonomy that demanded surrender. harry turned the phrase over in his mind like a stone, rough against his palm, smooth on the other side. it sounded noble, to choose. to be good, even when depravity tasted sweeter. but to choose implied that choice was ever truly his.
the idea unsettled him. if the end was written, if he was meant to fall, then what purpose was there in resisting? if the flame was always there, waiting for the moth, could he be blamed for burning?
but harry frowned at the notion, rejecting it like the apple beginning to rot. to believe it was inevitable was to strip himself of accountability. it was to call it fate instead of what it really wasāa weakness he didnāt want to name aloud.
yet even as he denied inevitability, he could feel it breathing down his neck. the soft pull of gravity every time her eyes met his, wide and unguarded. her sweetness wasnāt like the syrupy fiction he had always known, too thick to be real. it was raw, unpolished, pure in its lack of pretense. he wanted to protect it, to shelter it, but how could he when his hands itched to touch it, to ruin it, to mark it as his?
guilt and desire were two sides of the same coin he couldnāt stop flipping. the choices felt infinite and yet singular, converging on herāthe catalyst, the temptation, the embodiment of his undoing.
he tried not to touch her, not to look too long, but the world conspired against him. his name on her lips sounded like an offering. her laughter felt like a secret. the way she walked, talked, breathedāit all felt intentional, even though he knew it wasnāt. she was innocent of his thoughts. she had no idea the storm she brought to life in him.
and maybe thatās what made her so dangerous. because he had spent years building walls, convincing himself that control was his greatest virtue. but her presence felt like waterāslowly eroding the stone, finding its way into the cracks he didnāt know existed.
he wanted to believe he had a choice. that he could walk away, untouched, untempted. but every step closer to her felt like destiny disguised as coincidence. her smile was a trap, but it was one he wanted to fall into, knowing full well there would be no escape.
harry thought of the apple in the garden. the lie it told about choice. the way it beckoned, its skin gleaming with the promise of sweetness. but the truth was, it wasnāt the apple that made him fall. it was the hunger that had always lived inside him.
thou mayest. the words tasted bitter now. because in the end, he knew he wouldnāt choose. he would only follow.
and maybe, he thought, that was its own kind of freedom.
ā BOSTON
there were a thousand ways to love someone.
it wasnāt a single language. it was a mosaic of dialects, some of which he spoke fluently, others he fumbled through, and some he would never master. it came to him in whispers, in roaring applause, in soft apologies spoken under foreign moons. love, in its rawest forms, could be a sonnet sung aloud or the silence between breaths. it could bloom in the mundane, sprouting like ivy through the cracks of familiarity. but it could also unravelāuntethered and wildāuntil it swallowed everything else whole.
now, though, it felt like a question he didn't know how to answer.
he had known it to be beautiful once, grand and uncompromising, like a symphony crashing through the walls of his chest. but now? now it felt softer, quieter. less a roar and more a whisper in the back of his mind, laced with something he couldnāt quite place.
april on the east coast was no season for romance. it was damp with promise, hesitant in its thaw. the skies hung low with slate-colored clouds, heavy but refusing rain, and the mornings were gray and cold enough to bite. it wasnāt exactly the kind of spring that painted postcards, but it had its own charmāthe kind of charm that settled not in sight, but in sound. in the low hum of city life, the rush of trains cutting through tunnels, the steady rhythm of days repeating themselves.
this time, though, harry was restless.
juniper had left with a kiss on his cheek and a laugh in her voice, her belly round with new beginnings, her flight booked to london. ādonāt let it go to your head,ā sheād teased, pointing a playful finger at him. ājust because youāre losing me doesnāt mean youāll fall apart.ā
he hadnāt fallen apart. not exactly.
but the void she left behind was wide, even if temporary, and it was her replacement who filled it.
YN arrived on a wednesday.
he had two days before the show. no real obligations until then, aside from thisāmeeting his new hair and makeup artist, seeing if she knew what she was doing before she had to work on him before a live performance.
he sighed, running a hand through his hair as he pushed open the door to his dressing room.
she turned when he entered, eyes widening slightly before she offered a small, polite smile.
āhi.ā her voice was soft, a little hesitant. āiām YN.ā
he took a few steps inside, nodding once. āharry.ā
she nodded back, exhaling quickly, like she was trying to steady herself. then, she gestured toward the cup.
āi got you a latte,ā she started. āiāi wasnāt sure what you usually drink, but i thought it might be nice. toāyāknow. start off on the right foot.ā
he glanced at the cup, then at her.
she was nervous. he could see it in the way she shifted her weight slightly, in the way she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.
it was a nice thought.
but he hadnāt touched dairy in years.
he didnāt say that, though. didnāt want to embarrass her. instead, he just gave her a small, appreciative nod.
he reached for it, offering a gentle smile. āthanks.ā
she looked relieved when he took it, her smile relaxing a little.
harry held the cup, feeling the warmth of it against his palm. he could smell it, the sweetness of whatever syrup sheād probably had them put in. vanilla, maybe. something soft.
he set it down on the vanity without taking a sip.
YN didnāt seem to notice, already turning to grab her kit.
āso,ā she breathed, glancing at him as she unzipped it, ājuniper gave me some notes on what you like. she said you prefer a really natural look.ā
harry nodded, lowering himself into the chair. āyeah. donāt like when it feels too heavy.ā
āgot it,ā she murmured, more to herself than to him, before pulling out a few brushes.
he watched her in the mirror as she worked, as she moved with careful, practiced hands.
she was quiet at first, focused. then, after a minute, she glanced at him.
āhave you always done your own hair?ā
he blinked, caught slightly off guard. āwhat?ā
āyour hair,ā she said, brushing her fingers lightly through the strands. ājuniper said youāre pretty particular about it. that you usually style it yourself.ā
he huffed a soft laugh. āyeah.ā
she smiled a little, just a flicker, before returning her focus to her work.
harry swallowed.
this was fine.
just a job.
just another day before a show.
but the latte sat untouched on the counter, the scent of vanilla lingering in the air.
harry had a feeling sheād linger with it.
there was just something about her, something that felt unguarded. almost naive.
she wasnāt, not entirelyāhe learned that quickly. she had edges, sharp ones when needed, but she wielded them sparingly. the rest of the time, she was all soft hands and big eyes, a honeyed warmth that seeped into everything she touched.
and harry?
harry was careful not to touch her at all.
there was a distance he liked to keep, a careful line between himself and everyone else. not because he didnāt careāhe cared more than heād admitābut because he knew what could happen when he let someone too close.
still, she had a way of leaning past those lines. not intentionally, but like ivy, like roots. like something that simply grew.
by the time april had given way to may, harry found himself watching her more than he should.
she hummed when she worked, soft melodies that floated through the room like ghosts of songs she couldnāt name. she wrote everything down in a little notebook, scribbling furiously with a pen that always seemed to run out of ink at the worst times.
heād caught her once, shaking it with a frustrated pout, her lips pressed together in concentration.
āyou alright there?ā heād asked, the words slipping out before he could think better of it.
sheād blinked up at him, startled, and then laughed, āanother losing battle with this pen.ā
āyou have tātap it against your forehead twice.ā heād replied, biting back a smile.
her eyebrows furrowed, but she did it anywayālightly tapping the clicky part against her head, glancing at harry before trying to write again.
of course it didnāt work. he was just messing with herāwanted to see if she fell for it, wanted to see if sheād listen.
it was easy to fall into moments like that with her.
too easy.
thou mayest. a soft hand offering an apple, a question left unanswered. but he had his own questions, ones that wrapped themselves around his throat and refused to let go.
there were a thousand ways to love someone, and harry had spent his life learning only a fraction of them. though sometimes he wondered if heād been learning them for her.
ā EDINBURGH
he had always thought of temptation as a slow build, like the simmering heat of a kettle left on the stove, a soft whistle at first that could grow into a shrieking insistence if ignored too long. but that night, in the quiet sprawl of his hotel suite, it didnāt simmer. it coiled.
the city welcomed them with a gray drizzle and jet lag that stuck to the skin like damp clothes. the flight over had been long, hours stretched taut over time zones and turbulence, and by the time he made it to the room, he wanted nothing more than to shed the weight of travel.
his suitcase lay half-open on the floor, a quiet surrender to the fatigue he couldnāt shake. a glass of water sat on the bedside table, untouched, condensation pooling beneath it. harry stretched out on the mattress, arms behind his head, eyes closed but nowhere near sleep. the city murmured beyond the windowāa muted symphony of car horns and distant voicesāand he let it play in the background.
his phone buzzed.
yn: did you get back to the hotel okay?
he smiled faintly at the screen, her name like a flame too warm to look at directly. his fingers hovered over the keyboard for a moment before he responded.
harry: all 10 fingers and toes. safe and sound.
harry: you get back okay?
the reply came almost instantly, her eagerness spilling into the space between them.
yn: mhmmm. iām just brainstorming a few ideas for upcoming shows :) if you give me a penny, iāll give you my thoughts.
a laugh huffed through his nose.
harry: consider a penny given, then.
he settled deeper into the bed, phone balanced in his hand as he waited. the seconds stretched into minutes, the screen dimming twice before the vibration returned. when it did, it wasnāt just one text, but a cascadeāa waterfall of thoughts so uniquely hers that he could almost hear her voice speaking them aloud.
it was color theory, ideas layered with excitement, messily typed but earnest. how the blues of certain lighting might dull the warmth of his skin, or how curls framing his face might draw more focus to his eyes.
yn: does that make sense?
he hesitated, fingers hovering over the keyboard.
harry: absolutely. honored to work with such talent.
her suggestions were goodābetter than good, really. but it wasnāt the content that had his heart pacing against the walls of his chest. it was the way she thought of him in terms of details. the curve of his hair, the way light caught in his eyes. how she looked at him as if he were something to be fine-tuned, polished, perfected.
he set the phone down, staring at the darkened ceiling.
it wasnāt the first time heād felt it, the pull of her presence. she had a way of moving through spaces as though she belonged in all of them. she was sharp where it mattered and soft everywhere else, a tangle of contradictions that didnāt feel contradictory at all.
he wasnāt blind to it, eitherāthe closeness, the fleeting touches she didnāt seem to think twice about, the way her laughter lingered in rooms after she left them.
and yet, he couldnāt let himself fall. not into this.
his hand twitched toward the phone again. temptation was a voice now, low and insistent, curling in his gut. he thought of her in her room, probably cross-legged on the bed with her notebook splayed open and a pencil tucked behind her ear, her face alight with whatever new idea had struck her.
she was likely still wearing the hoodie from the plane, the one she had pulled over her knees to keep warm. she had smiled at him through the terminal, soft and shy, a blush touching her cheeks as she said goodnight.
his phone buzzed again.
yn: i think the messy curls could make your eyes look softer. iām rambling, sorry! just a thought :)
it wasnāt fair, really. the way she existed so effortlessly, the way she lingered in his mind long after sheād left the room.
but temptation had a thousand faces, and tonight, it wore hers.
harry: never stop rambling.
ā GLASGOW
it felt colder than it should have for may. the overcast sky hung low, gray and swollen, threatening rain that would inevitably come. harry didnāt mind it, thoughāhe liked how the cold made his skin prickle, how it made the air feel cleaner when he breathed it in. but more than that, he liked how it kept everyone huddled indoors, tucked into the warmth of the stadium where soundchecks were already underway.
YN was perched on a stool near the mirrors, her knees pulled up just enough to keep her feet from dangling. she had been quiet all morning, focused, her delicate fingers meticulously painting tiny daisies onto the nail of his pinky.
āsome steady hands there.ā
she glanced up at him, and for a moment, her cheeks burned pink. āi have to. canāt mess up, right?ā
āyou could,ā he mumbled, leaning forward slightly, his tone teasing. āmight not mind.ā
her lips twitched, barely concealing a smile, but she quickly ducked her head back down, letting her hair fall into her face like a curtain. it was something she did often, he noticed, as if she were hidingānot just from him but from something bigger.
he didnāt press. not yet.
āwhat colorās next?ā he asked, tilting his head to look at the neat little bottles lined up on the counter.
āyellow,ā she replied softly. āyou said you wanted bright.ā
āa sunshine yellow, then.ā he watched her carefully as she reached for the polish, her fingers trembling ever so slightly before she steadied them again. āyouāre sweet, you know that?ā
her hand froze midair, and he swore he saw her breath hitch. she looked up at him then, her wide eyes meeting his, and he felt it againāthat pull.
āwhat?ā she said, her voice barely above a whisper.
āyouāre sweet,ā he repeated, the corner of his mouth lifting into the faintest of smirks. āmakes me wonder if anyoneās ever told you that before.ā
she blinked, her lashes fluttering like the wings of a moth caught too close to a flame. āiāi donāt know.ā
his smile deepened, but there was no malice in it, only warmth. āwell, you are. just thought you should know.ā
YN turned her attention back to his nails, her head bowed so low now he could only see the crown of it. the pink flush on her cheeks had deepened, spreading to the tips of her ears.
he liked that. he liked how easily she reacted to him, how her softness made him feel like he could step closer without shattering her completely. but he also hated it, hated how it clawed at his resolve, making him forget all the reasons heād told himself to stay away.
when she finished the daisies, she leaned back, examining her work with a satisfied little nod. ādone.ā
āyouāre sure?ā he asked, lifting his hand and turning it this way and that, letting the light catch the glossy polish.
āpositive.ā
ālooks perfect,ā he said, though this time he wasnāt teasing. āthank you.ā
her lips parted, just slightly, like she wasnāt sure what to say.
before she could speak, the sharp click of the dressing room door broke the moment, and jeff stuck his head inside.
āfive minutes, harry,ā he called, already looking at his phone as he spoke. āgot people waiting.ā
he nodded, his expression unchanged, though the moment felt heavier now, disrupted by the intrusion. āright. cheers.ā
jeff disappeared again, the door clicking shut behind him.
he stood, stretching his arms above his head, and caught the way YN watched him out of the corner of her eye before quickly looking away.
āiāll get you something from the vending machine.ā he mentioned casually, already fishing into his pocket for his wallet.
her head snapped up. āyou donāt have toāā
āhush,ā he interrupted, grinning now. he stepped closer, reaching for her hand, and put four quarters into her palm. āyouāll need this. unless yāplan on charming the machine into spitting one out for free.ā
her fingers curled around the coins, and she blinked up at him, her lips parting as if to argue. but she didnāt. instead, she offered him a soft, grateful smile.
āthank you.ā
he only hummed as she slipped the quarters into her pocket and hopped off the stool, glancing at him one last time before heading for the door. when she was gone, the room felt too still, the faint trace of her perfume lingering like an echo.
he exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. his nails gleamed in the fluorescent light, the little daisies smiling up at him like they knew something he didnāt.
meanwhile, the vending machines would glow faintly at the far end of the hallway, their soft hum breaking the quiet. YN shuffled closer, her shoes padding lightly against the concrete floor.
but the faint creak of a door opening behind her made her pause, her head turning toward the sound.
he was there again, stepping into the hallway and heading the opposite direction.
harry moved with the kind of unhurried confidence that made it seem like the space around him belonged to him and him alone. his legs carried him in long strides, the sharp crimson of his trousers catching the dull overhead lights with every step. the matching red suspenders hung loose, swinging lazily at his sides, as though heād been interrupted mid-motion while shrugging them up.
his shirt was unassumingāblue and striped, halfheartedly buttoned. the fabric clung to the broad line of his shoulders before softening at his waist, tucked neatly into his trousers. the buttons stopped low, of course, just enough to reveal the sharp dip of his collarbones and a teasing stretch of bare skin below.
YNās eyes lingered longer than they should have, tracing the slope of his jaw, the faint stubble along his chin, the way the fabric shifted across his back when he moved. it was unfair, really, how tall he seemed here, how he could fill even the emptiest hallway with his presence.
he hadnāt noticed her yet. his head was down, focused, his mouth pressed into a line of mild concentration. whatever jeff had needed him for was probably important, judging by the speed of his stride.
but then, as though heād sensed it, he looked up.
their eyes met brieflyājust a flicker, but it was enough.
harryās pace slowed for a fraction of a second, his brows lifting in faint recognition as his gaze settled on her. he didnāt smile, not fully, but the corners of his mouth twitched like he mightāve.
YN felt her stomach twist, that now-familiar warmth creeping up her neck and blooming across her cheeks. she wasnāt sure why she felt caught, like sheād been caught looking when she hadnāt meant to.
āget your cola yet?ā his voice carried down the hall.
she managed to shake her head, ānot yet.ā
ābetter hurry, then,ā he nodded toward her, resuming his stride. āpressāll be crawling through soon.ā
he didnāt wait for her response, his figure already retreating, his strides long and effortless as he disappeared around the corner.
YN let out a slow, shaky breath she hadnāt realized she was holding, her fingers unclenching one by one. she glanced down at the quarters in her palm, their edges pressing faint imprints into her skin.
when she turned back to the vending machines, the glow seemed a little brighter, the hum a little louder, but the air in the hallway still felt heavy. she slid the coins into the slot one at a time, their metallic clinks echoing in her ears, and pressed the button for a coke.
her fingers closed around the bottle, and for a moment, she stood there, staring at the blurred reflection of herself in the machineās plexiglass. her cheeks were still flushed, her heartbeat unevenāonly harry could manage such a reaction without even doing anything.
he wasnāt even looking, she thought, shaking her head as she straightened up. he wasnāt even looking anymore. but it didnāt matter, not really. her stomach still fluttered like it always did.
she kept herself busy while harry was off handling whatever jeff had thrown his way. it was easy, most daysāfinding small things to do in the dressing room, small tasks that helped settle the nervous energy she always seemed to carry.
she tucked loose bits of makeup back into their designated compartments, straightened the mess of brushes and bottles that had accumulated along the counters. the quiet helped, too, though she occasionally paused, distracted by the faint voices coming from the small television mounted on the wall.
the scottish accents were thick and lilting, pulling her attention away entirely when she let herself linger too long. sheād tilt her head toward the screen, catching snippets of an old comedy show she didnāt recognize, before shaking herself out of it and returning to her task.
her coke was still cold against her palm, condensation slicking the skin of her fingers as she took small, absentminded sips. but when she ran out of things to tidy, out of ways to fill the silence, she left the dressing room, wandering through the backstage halls.
this was a habit of hers, especially in new places. she liked exploring, even if the halls all tended to look the sameānarrow and gray, the faint hum of activity reverberating off the walls.
voices carried from somewhere distant, bouncing in ways that made it impossible to pinpoint their origin. she walked slowly, her free arm occasionally brushing against the rough cinderblock walls.
then she stopped.
her eyes caught on something hung up on the wallāa plaque with a faded photo and an inscription below it. she stepped closer, squinting to make out the worn text, her head tilting slightly as she read. it mustāve been a gift to the stadium years ago, a relic from a time before she was even born.
the faint hum of voices seemed to grow louder as she stared, but she didnāt move. her thoughts wandered as she read the plaqueās history, the drink cool in her hand, her sneakers shifting on concrete like she couldnāt bear to stand still.
but after a beat, she decided sheād seen enough.
she spun on her heel, ready to continue her aimless walk, but she bumped into something solid before she even realized she wasnāt alone.
āoh!ā she gasped softly, jerking back slightly, enough to regain balance.
it wasnāt just something solidāit was someone.
harry.
his hand brushed against her shoulder instinctively, steadying her with a light touch that felt more deliberate than it probably was. he let out a breathy laugh, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he glanced down at her.
ādidnāt see yāthere, sweetheart.ā
the word hit her square in the chestānot the casual murmur of her name he usually used but something gentler, more pointed. he rarely called her that, maybe once every few days at most, and it always left her struggling to figure out if he meant anything by it.
she blinked up at him, still flustered, her heart kicking up in her ribs as she took a step back. he towered over her, as always, broad and imposing in such a narrow place. the suspenders sheād seen earlier were in place now, stretched over his shoulders, accentuating the sharp lines of his frame. and even though sheād only finished fixing his hair a short while ago, it already looked tousled, like heād run his fingers through it more than once.
her cheeks heated, but she smiled anyway, nodding toward the plaque on the wall in an effort to distract herself. āwas lookinā at this.ā
he followed her line of sight, the faint curve of his mouth lingering as he took a moment to glance it over. āfrom the old firm game,ā he muttered, āback in ā39.ā
āoh.ā she breathed, her eyes darting between him and the plaque.
ānot to be confused with the old firm of ā71,ā he added, the faintest hint of a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth as he looked back at her fully.
YNās eyebrows furrowed as she tilted her head, trying to place the significance.
he leaned in slightly, his shoulder brushing hers lightly as he continued, āāwhere a bunch of people died.ā
the words were said so casually that it took a second for them to register, and by the time they did, he was already walking off.
she gasped, following after him, āwhat do you mean?ā she asked, her voice tinged with disbelief. āpeople died here?ā
he glanced back at her briefly, his expression unreadable, though his lips still carried the faintest hint of amusement. āmm-hmm.ā
āwellā¦what happened?ā she pressed, quickening her pace to match his.
instead of answering, he slowed just enough to turn toward her, his hand reaching out with an ease that made her breath catch. without a word, he plucked the coke from her hand, his fingers brushing hers for the tiniest moment before he raised it to his lips.
āstadium disaster,ā he said finally, his voice calm, ending with the quietest of sighs from his swallow.
he handed the bottle back to her with the same ease, his fingers grazing hers again as the cool glass settled back into her hand.
āthatās it?ā she asked, incredulous. ājust stadium disaster? thatās all youāre giving me?ā
he glanced down at her, āyouāve got a phone, havenāt you?ā
āwellā¦ā she paused, the faintest of frowns on her lips, āyou canāt just drop a bomb on me ānd walk away.ā
he chuckled, pushing open the door leading back toward another corridor. ācanāt i?ā
YN opened her mouth to argue, but the door clicked shut behind him, leaving her standing there in the middle of the hallway.
she frowned further, tipping the bottle back to finish the last swallow before tossing it into the recycling bin with a soft clink. without much thought, her feet carried her toward the door he had disappeared through, her curiosity prickling like static under her skin.
it wasnāt that the news upset her, though the thought of people dying here was unsettling, sure. it was more that this stadiumāthe one they were standing in right now, bustling with life and noiseāhad that kind of history to it. stadium disaster. how vague. it wasnāt much to go on, and her mind raced with questions she couldnāt quite tamp down.
was it safe for harry to perform here? was it haunted, for godās sake? and how did he know about it so casually, like it was the kind of trivia everyone carried around in their back pocket? was it some bit of history heād picked up while preparing for the tour? orāshe glanced down the hall, chewing her lipāwas he just messing with her?
she pushed through another set of doors, the muffled hum of activity on the other side growing louder as it swung shut behind her. the hallway was wider here, brighter, with distant voices overlapping in a way that made it hard to pinpoint where they came from.
her eyes scanned the space ahead, searching for that familiar figure. he wasnāt hard to spotātall and broad, the opposite of waldo.
āharry! wait, please!ā
he slowed, turning his head just enough to glance over his shoulder. he smiled when he saw her, but he didnāt stop walking.
she huffed, her stride quickening against the floor as she caught up to him.
āsānot fair to tell me something crazy like that and leave me behind.āshe mumbled, her voice low enough that only he could hear.
ālike what?ā he asked, feigning innocence as he glanced down at her.
āstadium disaster,ā she repeated, rolling the words on her tongue like they didnāt make sense. āwhat does that even mean?ā
he shrugged, his steps slowing slightly to match hers. āmeans what it sounds like, doesnāt it?ā
ābut thats not really an answer, though.ā
he stopped then, turning to face her fully, and the sudden weight of his attention made her heart stutter.
āhappened after a football match,ā he said, his tone even, almost conversational. āold firm derby. too many people trying to leave at onceācrush at the exit. sixty-six dead.ā
āsixty-six.ā she echoed.
he nodded, his expression steady, though his eyes softened slightly when they met hers.
āandā¦they still use the stadium?ā
ācourse they do.ā he shrugged again, slipping his hands into his pockets. āwas decades ago. fixed it up after.ā
ābut how do you know all that?ā
his lips twitched, just slightly, and for a moment, he looked almost sheepish. āread about it some time ago. thought it was interesting.ā
āinteresting.ā she mocked, shaking her head, though her lips curved faintly into a smile.
ādonāt look at me like that,ā he mumbled, a teasing edge creeping into his voice. āyou asked.ā
she let out a soft huff, though the faint smile still tugging at her lips betrayed her. before she could think of a retort, harry turned and began walking again, and she followed, of course.
his casual indifference to the conversation left her buzzing with curiosity. she hesitated for a moment before blurting, ādo you believe in ghosts?ā
āghosts?ā
āyeah,ā she nodded, brushing a stray strand of hair behind her ear. āyou said all those people died here. i donāt knowāplaces like that feel like theyādā¦hold on to something, donāt you think?ā
his lips curved into a faint smirk, but there was a flicker of something else in his eyes, something thoughtful. āyou think this place is haunted?ā
she shrugged, looking ahead instead of at him. āmaybe. you donāt?ā
ānot really.ā he said simply, his tone light but firm. ādonāt reckon iāve seen enough to believe in all that.ā
she frowned, glancing up at him again. āyouāve never had anything weird happen? not even on tour?ā
āplenty of weird happens on tour,ā he said with a low chuckle, his hand briefly brushing the suspenders at his chest as though adjusting them. ābut nothing spooky. unless you count jeff turning into a ghost every time i ask him to sort something out.ā
YN couldnāt help but laugh, the sound escaping her before she could stop it. āthat doesnāt count, harry.ā
āthen no,ā he replied, his voice calm but edged with amusement. ācanāt say iāve had the pleasure of being haunted. you?ā
her smile faltered, her gaze dipping to the ground for a moment. āno, butā¦i donāt know. places like this make me wonder.ā
he hummed low in his throat, tilting his head as if considering her words. ālike weāre all just leaving little bits of ourselves behind.ā
āyeah,ā she said softly, nodding. āsomething like that.ā
they lingered in the doorway, YN a bit unsure whether to turn back toward the dressing rooms or find something else to preoccupy herself with. this was where harry was supposed to disappear, where their brief exchange would end, and where sheād return to her usual wandering.
but he didnāt move just yet. instead, he reached into his pocket, pulling out his wallet. the motion was slow, his rings glinting faintly beneath the fluorescents.
āyou havenāt eaten today?ā he asked, though the tone of his voice wasnāt really a question. it was low and steady, more like a statement.
her lips pursed slightly as she tilted her head, giving the question more thought than she probably needed to.
āmm,ā she hummed, narrowing her eyes playfully as if she were weighing the truth. ānoāyes!ā she corrected herself quickly, a sheepish smile breaking across her face. āyes. i had breakfast and a snack earlier.ā
his lips twitched, the corner of his mouth lifting as if he were fighting the urge to smile. he didnāt say anything right away, just kept his eyes on her.
then, without a word, he pulled two twenties from his wallet, āhere.ā
YN blinked again, her eyes flicking between the money and his face, confusion blooming across her features. āwhat? no, harry, i canātāā
ātake it,ā he interrupted gently, his voice soft but firm. āgo get something decent. donāt let mitch con you into eating crisps fādinner again.ā
she hesitated, the weight of his gaze pressing on her as she chewed her bottom lip.
āseriously,ā he added, a faint smile tugging at his mouth now. āyouāll be doing me a favor. donāt want you passing out on me, yeah?ā
her cheeks flushed slightly at his words, but after another beat of hesitation, she finally reached out and took the money, her fingers brushing against his briefly as she did.
āthank youā¦again.ā
he only hummed, shrugging his shoulders casuallyāas if he didnāt just hand her forty bucks for a measly lunch.
and then, just as she thought he might disappear into the room ahead, he glanced at her again, his green eyes steady and bright under the harsh lights.
ādonāt wander too far.ā
she smiled faintly, her fingers tightening around the money. āi wonāt.ā
ā COVENTRY
her hands were slowly starting to become his favorite greeting.
the way they moved with a gentle rhythm, purposeful but soft, like they carried a melody he couldnāt quite place. it was the third week of the european leg, the air damp with the kind of lingering rain that clung to the skin and made hair curl at the edges. backstage was bustling, but in the quiet moments, when she flitted around him with a quiet focus, all harry could see were her hands.
small, unadorned, sweet.
she was touching up his face, her thumb dragging gently beneath his eye to smooth out a smudge. her breath smelled faintly of spearmint and the watermelon candy she had earlier. her eyes stayed fixed on the task, as if this moment was just another stitch in the fabric of her day. but for harry, it was a tear in the cloth.
she was too close. he could see the faintest sheen of her skin under the lights, the curve of her neck, the way her collarbones shifted as she moved.
lust wasnāt a stranger to him. it had been loud before, all-consuming. but this was different. this was quieter, heavier. something he was trying to smother, yet it refused to die.
he went cold that day. avoided her gaze, clenched his jaw, kept his hands tucked into his pockets like they might betray him.
but it only made her more thoughtful.
he saw her the next morning, her hair clipped loosely at the back of her head, strands falling lazily like theyād escaped on purpose. the change was subtle, but in the way she crafted herself into something sharper, more focused. the clipped hair gave him an undisturbed view of her neck, the hollow of her throat, the delicate slope of her shoulders.
he was undone.
a thousand images pressed against his mind, unwanted but insistentāhis hands spanning the column of her throat, bruises painted like watercolored violets blooming along her collarbonesāan evidence of his claimāthe curve of her jaw tipped back as she let out a sound meant only for him.
harry forced himself to retreat again.
she thought it was her breath next.
he noticed how she chewed bright green gum in a way that drove him mad, like it was an absent habit, the piece of gum rolling in slow movements. sometimes her tongue would peek past her lips as though she were about to blow a bubble but stopped halfway through.
harry had to sit down once after that, shaking his head like he could dislodge the thoughts from his skull. he thought of how her pretty lips would look wrapped around his cock. he could almost feel itāthe warmth, the wetness, the sound. he wondered if sheād be as quiet as she usually was, or if sheād scream his name loud enough for the entire stadium to be reminded of who theyāre here to see.
and now, she was kneeling by his side backstage, her fingers curling into the hem of his trousers to fix the cuff.
she smiled softly as she worked, her eyes flicking up to meet his for the briefest moment.
āyouāll trip over these on stage if they arenāt fixed.ā
he swallowed thickly, nodding, unable to form words. the thought of her on her knees, innocent and sweet, flooded his mind like a storm surge.
āthere.ā she sat back on her heels, her hands brushing against his ankles as she admired her work.
he looked at her, bathed in the golden backstage light, her hair still clipped back, her lips parted slightly as if waiting for his approval.
he clenched his fists.
the flow of time bent around her, her presence a rippling disturbance in the current.
harry shifted abruptly, muttering something about needing to check on mitch, and left the room without looking back.
ā MANCHESTER
the hotel was hushed, its grandeur dimmed by the evening hour. soft light spilled from sconces along the walls, pooling against polished floors, while the faint hum of distant conversation echoed through the lobby. most of the crew had disappeared within minutes, doors clicking shut as they vanished into their respective rooms, leaving the space cavernous and still.
but not harry. and not YN.
her room wasnāt ready yetāsomething about cleaning and turnaround, an oversight that had left her standing at the front desk with an apologetic smile and her suitcase at her side.
āshouldnāt be more than half an hour,ā the clerk had assured her, but YN had waved it off, her soft itās fine laced with the kind of understanding that always made harryās chest tighten.
instead of heading to his own room, he had lingered. he didnāt know why, or perhaps he did and simply didnāt want to acknowledge it. either way, he found himself sitting in a low-slung armchair in the lounge just off the lobby, the soft leather cool beneath his hands as he leaned back and stretched his legs out.
she sat across from him, perched delicately on the edge of a matching chair, her fingers fidgeting idly with the zipper of her bag.
his eyes flicked to her now and then, his eyes catching on the faint curve of her profile, the way her shoulders lifted slightly when she let out a quiet sigh. she didnāt seem restless, exactlyājust waiting.
the room was sparsely furnished, its decor understated but rich. in the far corners, small tables stood with chessboards carved into their surfaces, their pieces arranged neatly in expectation.
it was YN who noticed them first, her head tilting slightly as her gaze lingered on the nearest table. after a moment, she rose from her chair, her movements unhurried as she approached the board. her fingers brushed lightly over the edge of the table, tracing the grooves of the squares as if testing their texture.
harry watched her from his seat, his elbow resting on the armrest as his hand brushed over his jaw.
ādo you play?ā she asked suddenly, her voice soft but carrying across the quiet room.
he smiled as he stood, unfolding himself from the chair with an ease that made the movement seem almost languid, and crossed the room to join her.
āa bit.ā
āteach me?ā
he nodded, pulling out a chair for her. āsit, then.ā
he sat across from her after she settled, her fingers resting lightly against the edge of the table as she watched him reach for the pieces.
his hands moved with practiced ease, his rings catching the light as he adjusted the arrangement of the board. his fingers brushed against hers briefly when she leaned forward to help.
āthese are pawns,ā he said, his voice steady as he pointed to the row of small pieces. āmove one square forward, except on the first turnāthen it can be two.ā
she nodded, her brows furrowing slightly as she leaned closer, her eyes following the path of his hand. his voice was calm, measured, and she found herself drawn to the rhythm of it, the way he spoke as if the game were a story he was unfolding just for her.
ābishops go diagonally,ā he continued, sliding one across the board with a smooth motion. ārooks in straight lines. knightsāwell, theyāre tricky. they move in an L shape.ā
her lips curved into a small smile as she watched him demonstrate, the pieces clicking softly against the board.
ālike this,ā harry muttered, his fingers brushing against hers again as he nudged her hand toward the knight.
her breath caught faintly, though she didnāt pull away. instead, she let her fingers linger, her eyes flicking up to meet his for a brief, unguarded moment.
āgot it?ā
she nodded, her throat tightening as she swallowed the knot that had risen there.
āshow me.ā he encouraged, leaning back slightly but keeping his gaze steady on her. āgo ahead.ā
she hesitated for a moment, her fingers hovering over the pawn in front of her as her concentration shifted onto harryāfocusing on the way his hips bucked as he tried to get comfortable in his seat, the way his thighs spread apart, wide enough that his knees brushed against the legs of the table.
and itās like he knew the reason why her cheeks flushed. he was still leaned back, his hands folded and resting against his belly as he watched her. just watched. his breathing was even, the tip of his tongue sliding between his lips as they part.
āyou stuck?ā
her eyes immediately snap back to the pawn. āno,ā she murmured before she slid it forward.
the game moved slowly, each turn deliberate as he guided her through the motions. his voice stayed calm, patient, though the weight of his presence felt anything but.
she leaned forward more as the game progressed, her elbows resting on the table as she studied the board. harry mirrored her unconsciously, the space between them narrowing with every move.
her laughter broke the quiet at one point, soft and sweet, when her knight moved in the wrong direction and harry teased her gently about it. the sound lingered in the air, threading itself into the quiet like a melody, and harry found himself smiling despite the tension coiling in his chest.
she hesitated, her fingers hovering over a bishop as she tried to map out her next move. YN glanced up at him briefly, catching the faint smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, and quickly looked away.
āwhat?ā
ānothing.ā harry replied easily, though his smirk deepened.
āyouāre doing that thing,ā she said, her lips curving into a small pout.
āwhat thing?ā
āthat thing,ā she repeated, her hand gesturing vaguely toward him. āthe⦠i-know-something-you-donāt thing.ā
he huffed a low laugh, shaking his head slightly. āmānot doing anything.ā
her pout deepened, but she turned her focus back to the board. she moved her bishop with careful precision, setting it in place with a soft click before leaning back slightly, a triumphant smile blooming on her face.
ācheckmate!ā
he didnāt move at first. he simply blinked at the board, his lips twitching faintly as he leaned forward, his hands resting lightly on the edge of the table.
āis it now?ā
YNās smile faltered, her confidence wavering as she glanced back at the board, her eyes flicking over the pieces. she felt him lean closer, his presence warm and steady, the faint scent of his cologne lingering in the space between them.
āyouāve got my king in a corner,ā he muttered, his tone calm but edged with something almost teasing. ābutā¦ā
harryās hand moved then, adjusting one of his knights. the piece landed with a firm click, the move clean and calculated.
ācheck.ā
YN stared at the board, her lips parting slightly as she tried to make sense of what had just happened.
ābutāā she started, her voice trailing off as her eyes darted between the pieces.
he leaned back again, his smirk returning as he watched her. āclose, though.ā
her cheeks flushed, the warmth spreading up her neck as she let out a soft huff, her gaze dropping to the table. āthought i had it.ā
he shrugged, already starting to put the pieces in its original places. āalmost, sweetheart.ā he breathed, eyes fixed on checkerboards of black and white. āsājust a part of learning, hm?ā
she glanced up at him then, her eyes wide and uncertain, and he held her gaze for a moment longer than he should have.
before she could respond, the faint hum of footsteps drew their attention toward the desk. the clerk from earlier stood there, holding out a small keycard.
"miss YN?"
she blinked, startled for a moment before realizing what it meant. her room was ready.
he stood first, his movements unhurried as he straightened, his presence still commanding even in the small act of standing. he turned toward her, his hand brushing briefly against the back of her chair as he gestured toward the desk.
"guess that's your cue.ā
she hesitated, glancing back at the chessboard, its pieces nearly in their original places, before rising to her feet. she smoothed her hands over her pants, her eyes flicking to his.
"thanks for staying with me.ā
he nodded toward her, a small smile on his lips. āanytime.ā
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Summary: Youāre an aspiring actress waiting to be discoveredāthe embodiment of sunshine itself: radiant, stubborn, and perhaps a little too kind for your own good. Then you step into Harryās world, one painted in shades of grey, and nothing for either of you is ever the same
A/n: Hello my lovessss! I donāt even know where all this inspo came from, but Iām so happy with how it turned out! Iām always looking to grow and write better, so Iād love any feedback you have. Thanks for reading, love you all!
Word count: 20k
Warnings: Slow burn, angst, a bit of a mean Harry not too much, smut, virgin reader, oral sex m to f, unprotected but then protected sex lol.
You stared at the number in front of youā301āetched in gold serif font, elegant and a little old-fashioned. Pretty numbers, you thought. Your gaze dropped, scanning the ground for a welcome mat, but your brows knit together when you found nothing. No cheerful āhello,ā no quirky quote. Just bare floor.
Balancing two large suitcases and a tote bag slung over your shoulder, you adjusted the strap of your pink, flower-patterned sundress, took a deep breath, and knocked on the door with the biggest smile you could muster.
The voice was flat, the expression even flatter. He didnāt step aside or offer a hand with your bags, didnāt even invite you in. He just turned around, leaving the door wide open, and walked away.
And thenāhim again. Standing in the middle of the living room, holding out a piece of paper. At the top, in bold capital letters:
HOUSE RULES
No loud music.
No guests without permission.
Donāt touch my stuff.
Quiet hours: 10 p.m. ā 7 a.m.
Do NOT go into my bedroom.
Respect my food in the fridge.
Always carry your keys.
You skimmed through them, lips twitching. Some rules seemed normal enough, but others practically screamed: Hi, Iām grumpy as hell.
āRules,ā he said matter-of-factly. āTheyāre easy to follow. Your roomās down the hallway. Mineās across from it. If my door is closed, donāt knock unless the apartmentās on fire.ā
You blinked, swallowing hard like a stray kitten caught in the rain. āYes, understood.ā
āGreat.ā He didnāt even look at you as he disappeared into his room, door clicking shut.
He didnāt even ask my name, you thought with a sigh.
Dragging your bags down the hall, you found the room heād pointed out. Grey walls again, a slightly crooked bed, but a large window and a big closet. Simple, but enough. It surprised you how quiet everything wasāthe neighborhood, the apartment, him.
You werenāt used to quiet. Back home, silence didnāt exist. A big country house full of noise: two brothers, three sisters, mom, dad, grandma, an aunt and her twins. Someone was always crying, laughing, or arguing over a lost jacket. Pots clattered in the kitchen, dadās lawnmower roared at dawn, and voices spilled through every corner.
Nowājust silence.
You exhaled slowly, glancing at your suitcases. āItās fine,ā you whispered, more to yourself than anyone else.
You unpacked piece by piece, filling the room with tiny comforts: lavender bedding that smelled faintly of home, your worn bunny plushie, two pink mugs with cat ears, and a colorful French press. The quiet pressed in around you, but little by little, the room began to feel like yours. You wandered into the kitchen, opening cabinets until you found one with a strip of masking tape labeled with your name. Soā¦he had remembered it from your application. That counted for something, right?
You carefully placed both of your pink cat-ear mugs inside and set your colorful French press on the counter beside his sleek, black Nespresso machine. The contrast made you smileāsunshine versus storm cloud, side by side.
When you turned around to head back to your room, you startled, letting out a tiny squeak as you jumped. He was standing right there, silent as a shadow.
āWhatās that?ā he asked, brows furrowing.
āThis?ā You pointed at the French press, forcing a smile. āItās my Bodum French press. You like coffee?ā
āYeah,ā he said simply.
You waited, hoping he might add something moreāa follow-up question, a joke, anything. But instead, he moved past you, sat down on the sofa, opened his laptop, and that was the end of the conversation.
You exhaled softly. Moving away from home, youād expected challenges. You braced yourself for missing family, for the hunt to find a job. But this? Living with him? That already felt like a new, impossible level of hard.
Later that day, you finally finished unpacking the last of your things in your new room. The space looked warmer now, a little more you. Still, your stomach reminded you that your side of the fridge was empty, and maybeājust maybeāyou could even bake something later.
You tucked your wallet into a tote bag, slipped on your shoes, and slid the final cardboard box into the back of the closet. With a deep breath and a smile, you headed for the front door. A new start. You werenāt going to let a strangerāor his rulesādim your light andā¦
āForgetting something?ā
The voice made you pause, one foot already out the door. You turned back to see him leaning lazily against the wall, keys dangling from his finger. He wasnāt even looking at you, just spinning the key ring like it was second nature.
āOhā¦rightā¦ā You crossed the room, plucking the keys from his hand with a sheepish smile.
āRule number seven,ā he said flatly. āAlways carry your keys.ā
š
When you came back from the grocery store, tote bags digging into your hands, the faint sound of sizzling reached you before you even stepped into the kitchen. Peeking in, you spotted him at the stove, working a pan with calm precisionāstir-fry, by the smell of it.
āHi,ā you said softly, almost careful, already knowing not to expect much of a reply.
He didnāt look up, didnāt say the word back, but you caught the tiniest twitch in his jaw. Taking the silence as permission, you slipped past him and began stocking your side of the fridge, then the pantry.
Even with that stern, unreadable face, you noticed itāhis eyes flicking, quick and subtle, toward what you were unpacking. Maybe he was silently judging your colorful cereal boxes, or maybe he was just curious. Either way, the thought made you bite back a smile.
You placed the last box of cereal into the pantry, then hesitated, glancing at the sizzling pan in front of him.
āSmells good,ā you said softly. āDo you, um, want me to help with anything? Iām a pretty decent vegetable chopper.ā
He didnāt even look up, just shook his head once. āIāve got it.ā
That was the end of the conversation. You lingered for a moment, then nodded, more to yourself than him. āAlright⦠Iāll just wait until youāre done to make mine.ā
He gave no reply, so you slipped away to your room, scrolling idly through your phone to pass the time. The house was quiet except for the faint clatter of pans and the hiss of steam drifting through the walls.
Peeking out, you padded softly into the hallway. The kitchen lights were still on, the air fragrant with soy and garlic. He was there, already at the small dining table with his laptop open beside him, eating from a bowl like nothing in the world could disturb him.
On the counter, set neatly near the edge, was a second plate.
Your eyes flicked from the food to him, but he didnāt look at youādidnāt acknowledge you at all. He just kept eating, focused and unbothered. But something about the way that second plate sat waiting in plain view left no room for doubt.
With a small, grateful smile, you pulled the plate toward you, whispering under your breath, āMaybe not all grump.ā Before you could even finish, he pushed back his chair, scooped up his laptop, and disappeared down the hall. A second later, the sound of his bedroom door closing clicked through the silence.
You stood there for a moment, half amused, half frustrated. No words, no nothing, just action.
Still, you felt like you needed to say something back. When you finished and cleaned your plate you went straight to your room, grabbed a sticky note from your desk, you scribbled quickly:
āThanks for dinner ā”ā
With a grin, you tiptoed to his door and slid the note under the crack. It felt silly, like sneaking around in a game, but it was the best you could do.
š
The next morning, you woke to sunlight spilling through the big window and the faint hum of the city outside. The apartment, though, was silent. Too silent.
You stretched, rubbed the sleep from your eyes, and padded into the hallway barefoot. His bedroom door was wide open now, bed neatly made, no trace of him anywhere.
With the apartment empty, curiosity itched at you. You wandered slowly through the living room, eyes scanning the plain gray walls and beige furniture. Nothing personal. Not a single photo frame on the shelves. The counter was bare, save for the black Nespresso machine and the French press youād left beside it. You even peeked toward the side table by the couch, but there were only chargers and a coaster.
No pictures. No postcards. No magnets from trips. Not even a forgotten grocery receipt.
You stood in the middle of the room, tote bag from yesterday still by the door, feeling both amused and unsettled. āWho lives like this?ā you murmured.You circled back towards your room, ready to give up, when something caught your eye. A slip of paper sticking out from under his laptop charger on the coffee table.
Curiosity won over hesitation. You tugged it freeāa folded bill, crumpled at the edges, like it had been stuffed in a pocket and forgotten.
It wasnāt just a bill, though. Your eyes flicked to the bold letters at the top: The Rusty Note ā Live Music Fridays.
Beneath it, smaller print listed the lineup. And there it was: Midnight Avenue. The band name had a scribbled circle around it in black pen, and at the bottom of the receipt was a drink orderātwo beers, one soda.
Your brows lifted. So heās in a band.
Suddenly, the quiet, guarded guy in the next room didnāt feel so one-dimensional. You pictured him under stage lights, guitar in hand, the opposite of the silent shadow youād met at the door.
You set the bill back exactly where it had been, heart racing a little. A secret. A clue.Ā
āMidnight Avenue,ā you whispered, trying the words on your tongue like they were part of a puzzle youād just begun to solve.Ā
And also, just like that you broke rule #3
Back in your room, you sat cross-legged on the bed with your laptop balanced on your knees. The name still echoed in your mindāMidnight Avenue.
With a guilty grin, you opened a new tab and typed it in. The search results popped up quickly: a modest Instagram page, a couple of tagged posts, a handful of grainy bar photos.
You clicked on one video. The sound was tinny, recorded from someoneās phone, but it was enough. There he was, on stage under dim neon lights, guitar slung across his chest. His face was the same unreadable mask, but the way he played wasnāt. Confident. Alive. Like the music pulled out a side of him you couldnāt imagine in the quiet gray apartment.
You scrolled further, finding flyers for past gigs, a few comments about the bandās āmoody soundā and ālate-night energy.ā In one picture, he even looked like he was smilingānot big, not obvious, but enough to make you blink.
You leaned back against your lavender pillows, heart thudding faster than it should. So he wasnāt just the silent, rule-obsessed roommate. He was someone people went out of their way to see. Someone who belonged to a world you hadnāt known about until now.
The thought of asking him about it crossed your mindāthen you pictured his face, that flat tone of voice, the shut door. No. BAD IDEA.
š
The first few days in the city slipped by in a blur. You woke early, sometimes to find the apartment already empty, other times catching the faint sound of the shower running through the walls before his door closed again. He came and went like clockwork, never volunteering where he was headed, never asking where you were going.
You tried. Cheerful good mornings, small comments about the weather, even casual questions about the best grocery store nearby. Heād answer, but never more than the bare minimum. Words from him felt rationed. So you filled the silence with your own noise.
There were auditions. One ended before youād even spoken a line, the casting director waving you off with a polite, āWeāll be in touch.ā Another felt promising until the girl before you walked out clutching the script with the confidence of someone already chosen. You told yourself it was fine. There would be more.
In the evenings, you propped your phone against a mug and FaceTimed your family. Your sisters talked over each other, your dad asked if you were eating enough, your mom wanted a tour of the apartment. You tilted the screen carefully, avoiding the gray walls and keeping your lavender bedding in view instead.
When your friends called, you laughed and exaggerated the quirks of city lifeāthe subway, the pigeons, the endless honking. But you didnāt mention him. Not really. How could you describe someone so silent, so carefully walled off?
Still, curiosity lingered. You caught yourself listening for the sound of his guitar through the walls, sometimes you peeked into the kitchen just to see what he cooked, hoping for a clue about who he really was. But if he noticed your curiosity, he never showed it.
It was 10:30 p.m. when you stumbled back into the apartment, makeup smudged and your tote bag heavier than usual though you carried nothing new. You had spent all day chasing a role that had slipped right through your fingers the moment you walked into the audition room. The casting directorās blank stare, the clipped thank you, the way no one looked up when you leftāit all replayed in your head like a cruel loop.
By the time you reached your bedroom, you could feel the tight ache in your chest breaking into sobs. You didnāt even bother turning on the main light, just dropped onto the bed and fumbled for your phone. One ring, two rings, and then your best friendās familiar voice filled the silence.
You let it outāhow you felt humiliated, how maybe you werenāt cut out for this city, how every step seemed to prove you didnāt belong. Your words cracked, spilling into tears, your friendās voice on the other side a lifeline of soft encouragement. āYouāre not a failure,ā they repeated. āYouāre brave for even being there.ā
Your knees were curled into your chest, the phone wedged against your ear as you tried to steady your breathing.
āIām just⦠I donāt know what Iām even doing here,ā you sobbed into the speaker, your best friendās voice a soft murmur on the other end. āI thought I could handle rejection, but they didnāt even look at me, like I wasnāt worth the two seconds it would take to listen. And maybe theyāre rightāmaybe Iām not worth it.ā
Your words tumbled out, jagged and breathless, not realizing how loud youād gotten in the quiet apartment.
The knock on your door startled you so badly you almost dropped your phone.
āHold on,ā you whispered to your friend, wiping at your face with the heel of your palm.
The door creaked open just enough for Harry to appear, his hand still on the knob. His hair was mussed, his expression sharp and impatient.
āItās past ten,ā he said flatly, voice low and firm. āWalls are thin, soāā
He stopped.
The second his eyes met yours, glassy and rimmed red, his words faltered. He didnāt move for a beat, like heād been caught in something he hadnāt meant to step into.
You pressed your lips together, mortified. Your friendās voice was still faintly audible through the speaker, asking if you were okay.
Harryās jaw flexed. āSorry,ā then, without another word, he stepped back and shut the door gently.
You stared at the closed door, your breath still shaky.
Swallowing, you lifted the phone back to your ear. āSorry, IāuhāIāll call you back,ā you whispered, hanging up before your friend could protest.
For a long while, you just sat there in silence, the air heavy with what had just happened. After that you just went to brush your teeth and slumped in the bed praying to fall asleep quickly to forget about the audition and about your very grumpy very unknown roommate seeing you cry and making him uncomfortable.
You had broken almost three rules by nowāit was silly how you were more worried about the rule breaking and making him uncomfortable than your actual feelings. The thought made you want to laugh and cry at the same time. Instead, you pulled the blanket over your head and tried to will your brain into silence.
But of course, it didnāt work. Every time you closed your eyes, you saw the way heād stopped mid-sentence, the flicker of something softer in his expression before he shut the door.
Somehow, Harry being witness to your tears felt worse than the casting director telling you āthank you, next.ā And the worst part? You couldnāt figure out why.
The next morning, sunlight bled through the curtains, nudging you awake far earlier than you wanted. Your head throbbed faintly, your throat raw from crying. With a groan, you rolled over, half-expecting to hear faint kitchen noises or footsteps.
But the apartment was silent.
Dragging yourself out of bed, you padded into the hallway, hair messy, socks slipping on the wood floor. When you stepped into the kitchen, you stopped short.
On the counter sat a plateāscrambled eggs, two pieces of toast, and a small bowl of cut fruit, still fresh enough to glisten. A mug of black coffee steamed beside it, the smell curling warmly through the air.
Your chest tightened.
There was no note, no sticky reminder, nothing dramaticājust breakfast, plated neatly, waiting for you.
You glanced around as if he might appear from behind the fridge or step out from the hallway, but the apartment was empty. His keys were gone from the hook near the door.
Still, you sat down at the small table, staring at the food for a long moment before taking the first bite. It was simple, but somehow it tasted better than anything youād eaten since moving in.
And you couldnāt help the small, ridiculous smile tugging at your lips.
You spent most of the day in your room, alternating between scrolling job boards and rereading the audition notes that made you feel worse the longer you looked at them. But the thought of the breakfast kept sneaking back in, softening the edges of your mood.
By late afternoon, you heard the sound of the lock turning.
Harry stepped in, hair a little messy from the wind, guitar case slung over his shoulder. He kicked his boots off near the door and set his case down without noticing you at first.
Your heart thudded. You wantedāneededāto say something.
āHey,ā you started, voice tentative. āAbout⦠last night.ā
That caught his attention. He looked over, unreadable as ever, one hand still resting on the strap of his bag.
You twisted your fingers together. āIāIām sorry if I was too loud. I didnāt mean to break your rules. I just⦠had a rough day.ā
For a moment, you thought he was going to brush you off with a shrug and retreat to his room. Instead, he leaned against the wall, arms crossing over his chest.
āYou donāt have to apologize for crying,ā he said simply, his tone even.Ā
Relief washed over you, but also a little courage. āRight. Okay. Um⦠thank you. For breakfast.ā
His jaw worked for a second, like he wanted to deflect, but then his gaze flicked to yours. āFigured you probably didnāt eat last night. Donāt make it a big deal.ā
You smiled despite yourself. āI wonāt. Promise.ā
For the first time, something like the shadow of a grin tugged at his mouthāsmall, fleeting, but realābefore he pushed off the wall and grabbed his guitar case.
āGood,ā he said, and disappeared into his room.
Still, the moment lingered. And for the first time since moving in, you felt like maybeājust maybeāhe wasnāt entirely untouchable.
That evening, you were in the kitchen again, determined to bake something. The cupboards were still half-bare, but you had managed to grab flour, sugar, and a carton of eggs earlier. Cupcakes werenāt home, exactly, but they felt close enough.
You were whisking the batter when you felt that prickle at the back of your neckāthe same one you always felt when he suddenly appeared without a sound.
āDo you always hum when you cook?ā Harry asked.
You jumped, nearly spilling the bowl. āGodāyouāre like a ghost,ā you muttered, clutching your chest before setting the whisk down.
His lips curvedājust slightly. āDidnāt mean to sneak up.ā He moved to the fridge, pulling out a bottle of water.
You eyed him as he twisted the cap. āI didnāt know you noticed things like that.ā
āI notice a lot of things,ā he replied evenly, though his eyes lingered on the bowl, the bright silicone spatula, the messy bit of flour on your shirt. āCupcakes?ā
You nodded, suddenly self-conscious. āYeah. Thought it might make the place feel less⦠gray.ā
Something flickered across his face, quick as lightning. āNot a bad idea,ā he said, softer than you expected.
You blinked. āDo you⦠want one? When theyāre done, I mean.ā
He didnāt answer right away. Just took a sip of his water, watching you over the bottleās rim. Then, after a beat:
āMaybe.ā
And with that, he retreated back to the sofa, laptop in handābut the word stuck with you. Maybe. It wasnāt much, but from him, it felt like a door cracking open just enough to let a sliver of light through.
The smell of vanilla and sugar soon filled the apartment, warm and inviting in a way the gray walls never managed to be. You pulled the tray from the oven, setting it on the counter, and carefully spread pale pink frosting across the tops.
You hesitated before carrying one over to the living room, your heart thumping faster than it should for a simple cupcake.
Harry was exactly where youād left him, laptop balanced on his knees, fingers tapping lightly at the keys. His hair fell into his face until he pushed it back absently.
āHey,ā you said softly, holding out the plate. āTheyāre ready. You said maybe.ā
His eyes flicked up, then down to the cupcake, then back to you. He didnāt move for a second, as though testing whether this was some kind of trick. Finally, he closed the laptop with a quiet click and set it aside.
You placed the plate in front of him, feeling a ridiculous rush of nerves as he picked it up. He turned it in his hand once, studying the frosting swirl, before taking a bite.
For the briefest moment, his expression shiftedājust a flickerābut you caught it. His jaw relaxed, the corner of his mouth twitched, almost a smile.
āItās good,ā he said, voice low.
Relief bubbled out of you in a laugh. āThanks. I was afraid you were going to say you donāt eat sugar after nine p.m. or something.ā
That earned you a lookāsharp at first, then unexpectedly amused. He shook his head, taking another bite. āNot one of the rules.ā
His eyes met yours then, and for the first time, he didnāt look away right after. The silence stretched, softer this time, before he returned to his cupcake like it was a shield.
Still, that sliver of light through the door grew just a little wider.
You lingered nearby as he finished the last bite, trying not to stare too openly but unable to help it.Ā
āSoā¦ā you started, voice casual. Too casual. āDo you play often? The guitar?ā
Harryās eyes lifted to yours, unreadable. āYeah.ā
āAre you, umālike, in a band or something?ā you pressed, tilting your head innocently.
For a second, you swore you saw his mouth twitch, not in amusement but in recognition. His gaze narrowed, sharp but quiet, like he could see straight through you.
āFunny question,ā he said slowly, leaning back against the cushions. āMakes me wonder how youād even think to ask it.ā
Your stomach dipped. You tried for a shrug, feigning nonchalance. āJust⦠curious. Most people donāt have a guitar case lying around unless they use it.ā
He studied you for a long moment, as though weighing the truth in your words. Then he leaned forward, setting the empty plate on the coffee table.
āCuriosityās fine,ā he murmured, his voice even but edged, āas long as it doesnāt cross into rule three or five.ā
Your breath caught. You plastered on a smile, forcing your tone light. āNoted.ā
But the way his eyes lingered, sharp and knowing, made your pulse thrum faster. For the first time, you wondered if he already suspected how much you wanted to know.
š
The days blurred into a quiet rhythm. You tiptoed around his rules, careful not to push too hard, and heāwell, he started giving you more than one-word answers. Not a lot more, but enough to feel like cracks in his armor.
A muttered āMorningā when you crossed paths in the kitchen. A dry āThat smells edibleā when you burned your first attempt at pasta. Even the occasional question tossed your way, quick and casual, as if he regretted asking it immediately after.
Still, the apartment was missing something. It wasnāt just the silenceāit was the sterility of it all, beige and gray swallowing every corner. So, one afternoon, you came home balancing a small terracotta pot in your hands, a tiny green plant with wide leaves that practically radiated cheer.
You set it on the coffee table in the living room and stepped back, smiling. āThere,ā you said to no one, brushing the dirt from your hands. āInstant upgrade.ā
You didnāt hear him until his voice came from the hallway. āWhatās that?ā
You turned, caught in the act, but didnāt back down. āA plant. His name is Finn.ā
Harryās brow furrowed as he walked closer, hands in his pockets. He looked at the plant for a long moment, and you braced yourself for the inevitable rules lecture.
Instead, he crouched slightly, tilting his head as if assessing it. āItās not fake?ā
You blinked. āNo. Real.ā
His lips pressed together, and for the first time, you saw something like approval flicker across his face. āLooks⦠good.ā
The words were quiet, almost reluctant, but they warmed you more than you wanted to admit.
You grinned. āSo Finn can stay?ā
He straightened up, glancing at you briefly before turning toward his room. āAs long as you water him.ā
It was a small thing, but to you, it felt monumental. Like heād just admittedāwithout saying itāthat maybe he didnāt mind sharing the space with you after all.
š
Friday night, the city buzzed with life around you, but you didnāt feel like part of it. You were just tiredābone-deep tiredāfrom the week. When you reached the apartment building, though, your stomach sank.
Your tote was lighter than it should have been.
Keys.
You dug through the bag twice, then three times, even checked your pockets though you knew better. Nothing.
Your phone was in your hand, thumb hovering over his number. Rule seven screamed in your headāAlways carry your keys. You could practically hear his voice reminding you. Calling him felt like confessing a crime.
So instead, you sat down against the door. I can wait a while. At first, it was just to think, to stall for a minute. But the hallway was quiet, and the cool wall behind you made your eyelids heavy. Hours blurred, and before long, exhaustion pulled you under.
The sound of steps jolted you awake. Your head shot up.
āJesus ChristāY/Nā Harryās voice cut sharp before it faltered. He crouched down, frowning as he took in the sight of you curled against the doorframe, your dress wrinkled, your face marked from leaning on your arm.
āWhat happened?ā His voice was low, urgent in a way you hadnāt heard before.
āIāuhāā You rubbed your eyes, embarrassed heat rushing to your cheeks. āI forgot my keys. Didnāt want to bother you. With the⦠rule.ā
For a second, he just stared at you, something tightening in his jaw. Then he shook his head, running a hand through his hair.
āIn this scenario,ā he said firmly, almost like he was scolding himself more than you, āitās obviously okay to call me. You donāt sit out here all night.ā
The guilt in his eyes was clear, even if his voice stayed even. He stood, reaching down to help you up. āYou couldāve been freezing. Or worse.ā
You took his hand, letting him pull you inside. āI didnāt want to break the rules,ā you murmured
He exhaled, something like frustration threading through it. āForget the rules right now, alright? I donātā¦ā He trailed off, jaw tight, shutting the door behind you. āI donāt want you waiting out there again.ā
The words lingered between you, heavier than any rule taped to the fridge.
You hovered in the entryway, clutching your bag. He set his guitar case down with more force than necessary, then disappeared briefly into the kitchen. When he came back, he was holding a glass of water, which he pressed into your hands.
āDrink,ā he said, softer this time.
You obeyed, the cool water easing the dryness in your throat. When you set the glass down, you caught him watching you, something unguarded flickering across his face before he looked away.
āYou were out late,ā you said, trying for lightness. āGig?ā
He gave a short nod, toeing off his boots. āYeah.ā He paused, glancing at you again. āWent alright.ā
It wasnāt much, but it was the first piece of his life heād willingly offered. And after the night youād hadāsitting on the floor outside your own home, waiting, doubtingāyou clung to it.
āGood,ā you whispered, the corner of your mouth tugging up.
For once, he didnāt retreat straight to his room. He lingered a moment longer, then jerked his chin toward the hallway. āGet some sleep. You look wrecked.ā
And though the words were blunt, there was no edge to them this timeāonly a strange, quiet concern that followed you all the way to your bedroom door.
The next morning, the smell of something warm and toasty pulled you out of sleep. Blinking at the clock, you realized it was barely eight. That alone was unusualāHarry was never up this early unless he had somewhere to be.
Padding into the kitchen, you found him again at the counter, sleeves pushed up, hair a little messy, sliding scrambled eggs onto two plates. A small stack of toast leaned precariously beside them, and the coffee machine gurgled as it finished its last cycle.
Your throat went tight, remembering last nightāthe door, the guilt in his eyes, how small you must have looked curled up outside.
āMorning,ā you whispered.
He glanced over, jaw flexing like always, then nodded once. āSit.ā
You did, suppressing the smile tugging at your lips as he placed a plate in front of you. He didnāt linger, didnāt hover. Just poured himself coffee and sat across from you, silent but present. It was more than enough.
And then you noticed itātucked under your plate, almost like a placemat. A sheet of lined paper. The familiar scrawl made your stomach flip.
The Rules (modified):
Donāt go into my room.
Donāt touch my stuff.
No loud calls after ten. (exception: emergencies, yes crying is an emergency.)
If you forget your keys, call me.
Your eyes flicked up, and he was already watching you. Not glaring, not scoldingājust watching, a little stiff, like he wasnāt sure how youād react.
You traced the paper with your fingertip, lips curving despite yourself. āSo⦠exceptions exist.ā
He grunted, stabbing at his eggs with his fork. āYes.ā
You bit back the flood of gratitude rising in your chest, choosing instead to take another bite of toast like it was the most casual thing in the world. But your heart was racing.
Because for the first time since moving in, the rules werenāt just walls. They were⦠bending.
And that, you decided, was your biggest victory yet.
š
You smoothed the hem of your new dress in front of the hallway mirror, it was a pale yellow dress that looked like it had been plucked straight from a fairytale. The fabric was light and airy, layers of sheer tulle falling gracefully into a full, mid-calf skirt that swayed with every step. Tiny dotted patterns scattered across the material caught the light, adding a subtle shimmer. The bodice was fitted like a corset with sweetheart cups that framed your neckline and delicate ribbon ties rested on your shoulders.
Exactly what you needed for todayās audition.
Behind you, you heard footsteps. Harryās, slow and even, padding down the hall toward the kitchen.
You turned, smile blooming nervously. āHeyāum. Do I look okay?ā
He stopped dead a few feet away. For a beat, he didnāt say anything, just let his eyes flick over you onceāquick, but not quick enough. His jaw flexed, like he had to physically lock something back down.
Then, before he could stop himself, the words slipped out. āYou look like the sunshine.ā
The heat that rushed to your cheeks was instant, impossible to hide. āSunshine?ā you repeated, the smile tugging at your lips betraying how flattered you were.
He blinked, as though realizing what heād said. His mouth tightened, and he cleared his throat. āI meant⦠bright. Loud, even. Hard to miss.ā
But his ears were pink, and you could tell he was scrambling for cover.
You tilted your head, biting your lip to stop your grin from growing. āIāll take sunshine,ā you said softly, brushing past him toward the door.
And though he didnāt answer, you caught the faintest curve at the corner of his mouth before he ducked his head.
Later the door swung open with a dramatic push, and you all but burst into the apartment. Your tote bag nearly slipped off your shoulder as you stumbled in, laughing breathlessly.
āI got it!ā you squealed, tossing the bag on the couch. āI actually got the part!ā
Your whole body seemed to glow, the yellow dress still fluttering around your knees as you spun once in the middle of the living room, too thrilled to care if you looked silly.
Harry had been stretched across the sofa with his laptop, but at the sound of your voice he froze, watching as you beamed at nothing and everything all at once.
Heād seen you smile plenty of times, but not like this. This was blinding, unrestrained, pure joy radiating out of you until it filled the room. It made something sharp twist in his chest.
Because, if he was honest with himself, he couldnāt remember the last time heād felt anything like that.
Still, he found himself staring, jaw slack, as the corners of his own mouth tugged upward without permission. It was⦠contagious. Your happiness. And for the first time in a long while, he didnāt just want to observe it from the safety of his own silence.
He wantedājust for onceāto share it with you.
āYou got the part?ā he asked
You stopped twirling, eyes wide with delight, and nodded so hard your hair bounced. āI got it, Harry! They actually picked me!ā
He set the laptop aside, shifting forward on the couch. A strange, cautious warmth pressed against his ribs, a feeling that made him nervous to name. But still, he let himself smile, small but real. āThen I guess⦠congratulations.ā
Your laughter bubbled again, brighter than before, and he thought maybeājust maybeāhe could get used to this sound filling the apartment.
You spent the next hour pacing around your room, phone pressed to your ear as you called everyone you loved. Your mom. Your dad. Each one of your siblings. Your best friend. The words I got it! echoed again and again, your voice bright, bubbling, unstoppable.
Through the thin apartment walls, Harry could hear it allāyour laughter, your excited footsteps, the rise and fall of your joy spilling into every call. And even though he tried to keep his focus his lips betrayed him, tugging upward into a quiet smile.
It stirred something he hadnāt felt in a long time. Not jealousyāno, he didnāt begrudge you your happiness. It was more like a tug, an ache he couldnāt name. The way you trusted so openly, the way you shared so freely, like happiness was meant to be scattered around without fear it might run out.
He set the laptop down, running a hand over his jaw. Maybe⦠maybe he should do something.
His mind immediately began spinning. Should I buy a bottle of champagne? Noātoo posh, too over the top. Dinner, maybe? Invite her somewhere nice? What? No, that would feel like a date, and he wasnātāthis wasnātā
He groaned, scrubbing his hand through his hair. Maybe I should just cook? Something simple? But then he pictured himself fumbling around the kitchen and her bright eyes watching him, and his pulse spiked. No, no.
Beers? he thought desperately. That was safer. Neutral. But even that felt too forced.
Then it hit him. Of course. The gig.
She could come, watch the band, have a fun night, soak up the music, the atmosphere. It wasnāt a date, not reallyāit was casual, public, easy. And maybe, just maybe, it would let him share a piece of himself without having to strip down all his walls.
The idea settled into him and he sat there, rehearsing the words in his head like he was preparing for battle: You should come tonight. Itās just a small set. No big deal.
Casual. Harmless. Nothing more.
So why did his heart pound as if it meant everything?
You ended the last call with your best friend, still smiling so wide your cheeks ached. Your phone slipped onto the bed beside you as you leaned back against the pillows, staring at the ceiling, replaying every little detail of the day in your head.
A soft knock on your door startled you. Not much of a knock, reallyāmore like the back of a knuckle brushing against wood.
āYeah?ā you called, sitting up.
The door cracked open, and Harry leaned against the frame, arms crossed like he hadnāt been pacing in the hallway for the past three minutes working up the nerve. His voice was calm, casualāat least, thatās what he was aiming for.
āBig day, huh?ā he said.
You grinned at him, still unable to contain yourself. āHuge. I canāt believe it, Harry. I thought they hated me, and thenāā You stopped yourself before launching into another retelling. āSorry. Iāve been talking everyoneās ears off.ā
His lips twitched. āCould hear that.ā
Heat rushed to your cheeks, but he didnāt sound annoyedājust⦠aware. Observing.
Then, after a pause, he shifted his weight and spoke quickly, like ripping off a bandage. āListen, uh. Iāve got a gig tonight. Just a small set, nothing major. Thought you might wanna come.ā
Your brows shot up. Of all the things you thought he might say, that wasnāt on the list. āA gig?ā
āYeah.ā He shrugged, gaze darting past you to the corner of the room, like he couldnāt quite hold eye contact. āBar downtown. We start around ten. You donāt have toāitās justā¦ā He trailed off, clearing his throat. āFigured itās a way to celebrate?ā
The way he said itāso offhand, like it didnāt matter either wayādidnāt quite cover the faint pink climbing his ears.
You bit your lip to keep from smiling too much. āYouāre inviting me.ā
āIām⦠mentioning an option,ā he corrected, deadpan, though his jaw worked a little like he regretted opening his mouth at all.
Still, you could feel the smallest crack in his armor, and it warmed you all over. āWell,ā you said lightly, āthen I guess Iāll take the option.ā
His shoulders relaxed just the faintest bit. āCool. Iāll⦠we leave at 8.ā
And with that, he nodded once, retreating back down the hall before you could see the tiny, nervous smirk tugging at his lips.
š
The bar was dim, alive with the low hum of chatter and the clink of glasses. A string of colored lights zigzagged above the small stage, casting everything in a warm, intimate glow.
Harry walked in beside you, his hands shoved into the pockets of his black jacket, shoulders tight like he already regretted bringing you. You, on the other hand, practically bounced on your heels, your yellow dress a burst of light in the low-lit room.
As soon as you reached the stage area, a couple of guys looked up from tuning their instruments.
āHarry!ā one of them called, grin spreading wide. He had curly hair pulled back into a bun and sticks tucked under one armāclearly the drummer.
Harry gave a nod. āThis isāā He hesitated for half a second before gesturing toward you. āMy⦠roommate.ā
You stepped forward with your brightest smile, offering a hand. āHi! Itās so nice to meet you.ā
The bassist, tall and lanky with glasses slipping down his nose, chuckled as he shook your hand. āRoommate, huh? You donāt look like the type Harry would put up with.ā
āHey,ā Harry muttered, shooting him a look.
But you just laughed, the sound light and unbothered. āGuess Iām lucky then.ā
After a round of quick introductions, Harry mumbled something about needing to check the set list and drifted toward the back of the stage, leaving you to find a spot. You chose a small table off to the side where you could see clearly, resting your chin in your hand, still smiling like the whole night was already magic.
Back on stage, as they plugged in cables and adjusted mics, the bandmates couldnāt resist.
āSo,ā the drummer said under his breath, nudging Harry with his stick. āWhoās the sunshine?ā
Harryās brows drew together. āWhat?ā
āThe girl,ā the bassist chimed in, jerking his chin toward you. āSheās, like⦠a flower come to life. All bright and smiley. Total opposite of you.ā
Harryās jaw tightened. āSheās just my roommate.ā
āUh-huh.ā The drummer smirked. āFunny how your roommate shows up looking like she wandered out of a fairy tale.ā
Harry busied himself with tuning his guitar, but his ears burned.
āSheās sweet,ā the bassist added, lowering his voice conspiratorially. āSmiled at me like Iād just handed her a winning lottery ticket. Canāt remember the last time someone looked that happy to be here.ā He shot Harry a teasing grin. āNo wonder you brought her.ā
Harryās head snapped up. āI didnāt bringāā He stopped himself, shaking his head. āShe wanted to come.ā
āSure,ā the drummer said, smirking. āJust a coincidence the grumpiest guy we know suddenly has sunshine tagging along.ā
The bassist chuckled. āHonestly, I like it. Itās like yin and yang. You, all broody and dark, her, all light and joy. Balance, man. It works.ā
Harryās blush deepened as he muttered, āYou two sound ridiculous,ā but his fingers fumbled on the strings, betraying him.
Meanwhile, you sat at your little table, completely unaware, still smiling as you waved when you caught Harry glancing your way. He quickly looked back down, but not before the drummer elbowed him again with a knowing grin.
When the lights dimmed, a ripple of excitement spread through the bar. The casual chatter quieted, replaced by the anticipation of music about to begin. You leaned forward in your chair, elbows braced on the table, eyes fixed on the stage.
Harry stood near the mic, guitar slung low across his chest, head bent as he adjusted the strap. Even under the glow of red and amber stage lights, he seemed the same as alwaysāclosed off, unreadable.
But then he strummed the first chord.
The sound filled the bar instantlyāconfident, rough around the edges, alive. His bandmates joined in, the rhythm locking tight, and suddenly Harry wasnāt your grumpy, rule-obsessed roommate anymore. He was something else entirely.
The lines of his face sharpened in the lights, his jaw tight with focus, his eyes half-closed as if he was lost somewhere only the music could take him. He leaned into the mic, voice spilling out low and raw, pulling every head in the bar toward him.
You sat frozen, goosebumps prickling up your arms.
He didnāt just play the guitarāhe commanded it, every strum a piece of him let loose into the room. It was loud and unapologetic and yet so clearly his truth. For the first time, you understood why the rules, the silence, the wallsāmaybe he needed them just to contain this.
Your lips parted as you watched, unable to stop the slow smile spreading across your face.
And when his eyes flicked up for the briefest second, scanning the room, they landed on you. Just for a heartbeat.
Your smile widened, a little breath catching in your throat.
Harryās fingers faltered for the tiniest moment, a split-second stutter in the strings, before he caught himself and pushed harder into the chorus, jaw flexing like nothing had happened.
But you saw it. And he knew you saw it.
By the time the song ended, the bar erupted in applause, whistles and cheers bouncing off the walls. You clapped so hard your palms stung, still beaming up at him like heād just revealed a secret side of himself meant only for you.
And maybe, deep down, thatās exactly what it felt like.
The walk back to the apartment is quiet at first, though not uncomfortably so. The night air is cool against your skin, humming with the distant buzz of traffic and the echo of laughter spilling from nearby bars. You walk beside Harry with your usual bounce, coat wrapped tightly around your shoulders, a smile that hasnāt dimmed since the very first song he played.
Harry keeps his hands shoved deep in his jacket pockets, head ducked, curls clinging damply to his forehead. He looks tired in that flushed, post-gig way, but thereās something warm in the corner of his mouth, like even if he doesnāt admit it, heās still buzzing too.
āYou were amazing,ā you blurt suddenly, unable to keep it in any longer.
He glances at you sideways, caught off guard. āMm?ā
āLikeāHarry, seriously. Amazing. I donāt even know how you didnāt tell me you play like that! You justāā you wave your hands, as though words arenāt enough to capture what you feel. āYour voice! And the guitar, oh my God. And the way everyone just⦠followed you, like you were the center of everything. You donāt even realize, do you?ā
His steps falter, just barely. Compliments usually skim off him, deflected with a shrug or a joke, but you arenāt teasing. Youāre looking at him like he hung the stars, and it makes him visibly uncomfortable. He shrugs, tugging at his sleeve.
āIt was fine.ā
āFine?ā you gasp, scandalized. āHarry, it was so much more than fine! You were brilliant. I wish you couldāve seen yourselfāactually, no, I wish you couldāve seen yourself through my eyes. The way your face changed when you sang? And when you did that solo? Everyone was staring at you.ā
Harryās chest tightens. Too much. Your happiness, your belief in himāitās warm and suffocating all at once. By the time you both climb the stairs and step into the apartment, he looks like heās carrying a weight only he can feel.
You kick your shoes off by the door, still glowing. āHarry, I swear, youāre gonna be huge one day. Not just local gigs, not just little bars. Bigger. People need to hear you. They have to.ā
āStop,ā he mutters, moving toward his room.
You blink, mid-sentence. āStop what?ā
āJustāstop.ā He doesnāt look at you, his hand already on the door. His voice comes out harsher than he means, rough with nerves. āYou donāt need to say all that.ā
The silence after that cuts deeper than anything.
You stand there, frozen in the middle of the living room, arms still lifted in a gesture that now feels awkward. The smile slips right off your face. āOh,ā you whisper, small and stung.
He disappears into his room, the door shutting firmly behind him. Not a slam, but solid enough that it feels like a line.
You stay rooted where you are, heat rising in your cheeks. Embarrassment washes over you in waves. Maybe youād overdone it, maybe all that excitement spilling out of you was too much. Youāve been careful, trying not to overwhelm him, trying to respect the way he pulls back. And here you went, dumping everything on him in one breath.
You sit on the couch, hugging your knees. The silence presses heavy, but after a moment you remind yourselfāthis isnāt cruelty. He wasnāt trying to hurt you. This is Harry, retreating into himself, unsteady under the weight of kindness. Itās not about you being wrong. Itās about him not knowing how to hold it.
Through the wall, you think you can hear the faint creak of his mattress as he sits.
Inside his room, Harry is dragging his hands down his face, cursing himself. Every word youād said replays in his headābrilliant, amazing, bigger than this. And he canāt believe any of it. Canāt let himself. But the way youād said it, like it was the truest thing in the world, burrowed under his skin. He shuts his eyes, listening.
Your voice carries faintly through the wall, muffled but clear. Youāve picked up your phone, calling someoneāmaybe your sister again, maybe a friend. He doesnāt mean to eavesdrop, but your laugh filters through, bright and unguarded.
āIām just⦠so proud of him,ā youāre saying. āYou shouldāve seen him tonight. He was everything. Iāve never seen someone glow like that before. And he doesnāt even realize. He doesnāt see it at all. But I do.ā
Harryās chest aches. He presses a hand against it, as though that will keep the feeling at bay, but it doesnāt.
Because even after he pushed you away, even after he shut the door, youāre still out there believing in himālouder than he can ever believe in himself.
And for the first time in a long, long time, he finds himself smiling in the dark. Not a smirk, not a mask. A real smile. Small, fragile, but real.
Maybe, he thinks, it wouldnāt be so terrible to share in some of that happiness you carry so easily.
š
The morning light filters into the kitchen when you shuffle in, still in socks, hair messy from sleep. The apartment feels unusually still, like itās holding its breath after what happened last night. You hesitate for a second before stepping farther in, half-expecting to find Harry already gone like most mornings.
But heās there.
Sitting at the table, one hand wrapped around a mug, the other tapping lightly against the wood. His guitar leans against the wall nearby, and thereās a plate of toast and eggs on the counterāyour plate, you realize.
His head lifts when he hears you. His eyes meet yours, green and sharp in the early light, but softer than usual. Almost uncertain.
āMorning,ā you say carefully, testing the air.
āMorning,ā he echoes, voice rough from sleep or nervesāyou canāt tell which.
You walk over, fingers brushing the edge of the counter as you pick up the plate. For a moment, you wonder if you should just sit in silence, let it all fade. But then you notice the way heās watching you, like heās waiting for somethingālike heās the one holding his breath now.
So you smile. āThanks for breakfast.ā
He clears his throat, gaze dropping to his mug. āāS nothing.ā
You sit across from him, plate between you, and the silence stretches again. Only this time itās not awkwardāitās heavy, expectant. You can feel him wrestling with words.
Finally, he exhales and leans back, one hand rubbing the back of his neck. āAbout last nightā¦ā
You look up. His jaw flexes, like heās bracing himself.
āI didnāt mean toāshut you down like that,ā he says slowly, carefully. āIām⦠not used to it. People saying things like that about me. About the band. I donāt⦠I donāt know how to take it.ā
Your chest softens instantly. The words arenāt smooth, not polished, but theyāre honest. Maybe the first honest thing heās given you since you moved in.
āI know,ā you say gently, setting your fork down. āI figured it wasnāt about me. I didnāt take it that way.ā
His eyes flick up at that, sharp and searching, like heās checking if youāre telling the truth.
You nod, holding his gaze. āYou donāt have to explain or make excuses, Harry. I meant what I said, but you donāt have to believe me yet. You will, someday. For now, justādonāt worry about it.ā
Something flickers across his face thenārelief, disbelief, something warmer underneath. His lips twitch, almost like a smile, though he presses them together quickly, hiding it.
āYouāre not mad?ā
You laugh softly, shaking your head. āMad? No. Embarrassed maybe, for rambling so much, but never mad. Not at you.ā
His shoulders drop a fraction, like a weight has eased off. He looks at you differently nowānot just the noisy, sunny roommate he canāt keep up with, but someone patient enough to see through the walls heās built.
For a moment, neither of you speak. The sunlight spills across the table, catching in his hair, warming the quiet between you. And then, almost too quietly to catch, he says:
āYouāre⦠easier to be around than I thought.ā
Your heart skips, but you donāt let your smile falter. You just reach for your toast, keeping your tone light. āThatās the nicest thing youāve said to me so far.ā
He huffs through his nose, shaking his head, but then it happensāan actual laugh. Low, short, almost like he didnāt mean for it to escape.
You freeze mid-bite, eyes widening. āWait.ā You set the toast down carefully, pointing at him with exaggerated seriousness. āWas that a laugh? Did I just make you laugh?ā
Harry smirks, trying to bury it behind his mug, but you catch the way his shoulders shake slightly.
āOh my god, it was a laugh!ā you say, grinning so wide it hurts. āI should write this down. Mark the date and time.ā
He groans, rubbing a hand over his face, but you swear thereās still the ghost of a smile tugging at his lips.
āYouāre ridiculous,ā he mutters, but itās softer than usualālighter, almost fond.
And you canāt stop staring at him, at how different he looks in that moment, not weighed down by walls or silence. For the first time since moving in, you feel like youāve just caught a glimpse of the Harry that lives underneath the rules, the stern looks, the quiet.
And it makes you want to see it again.
That night, the apartment was unusually calm. You sat curled up on the couch, legs tucked beneath you, scrolling half-distractedly through your phone while the glow of the TV played in the background. Harry walked in from his room, hair still damp from a shower, and for a moment he just stood there, hovering like he wasnāt sure whether to stay or retreat.
Then, quietly, he asked, āSo⦠the audition?ā
Your head snapped up, eyes wide. You hadnāt expected him to bring it up. Not him.
āItāā your voice cracked on the first word, and you laughed nervously, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. āIt actually went really well.ā
Harry tilted his head, watching you closely, waiting for you to go on.
āThey said I had something different, that I wasnāt like the others. I swear I thought Iād bombed it, but thenāthen they called me back in and said they wanted me for the part. I couldnāt believe it!ā
You were grinning so hard your cheeks ached, your words spilling out like water bursting through a dam. You told him every detailāthe waiting room, the nerves, the moment they said your name.
And Harry⦠he listened.
Not with that half-distracted air he usually carried, not with the distant coolness youād grown used to. He leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, eyes fixed on you as though your joy was something rare, something worth holding on to.
When you finally stopped for breath, cheeks flushed, he gave the smallest nod. āKnew theyād see it.ā
Your smile faltered just a little. āYou⦠what?ā
Harry shrugged, but his lips tugged in a tiny almost-smile. āKnew theyād pick you. You light up when you talk about itāitās hard not to notice.ā
Your chest tightened at his words, unexpected warmth rising in your throat.
And then, as if he realized heād said too much, he cleared his throat and straightened. āIf you need help practicing⦠lines or whateverāyou can⦠ask me.ā
You blinked at him, stunned. āYouād actually do that?ā
His eyes flicked away, a faint pink brushing his cheeks. āDonāt expect me to be good at it. But yeah. Iād help.ā
For a long moment, you just stared at him, smiling so wide it was almost ridiculous. āHarry Styles, volunteering to rehearse lines with me. I should definitely mark the date and time for this too.ā
He let out another one of those quick, reluctant laughs, shaking his head as he muttered, āYouāre impossible.ā
But you noticed the way his eyes lingered on you, softer now, like he was secretly glad you were.
š
The first time, it was the rain.
You hadnāt realized the sky had cracked open until you were already halfway back from the store, juggling two bags of groceries and drenched head to toe. By the time you stumbled into the apartment, your hair was plastered to your cheeks, sundress clinging uncomfortably to your skin.
Harry appeared from the hallway almost instantly, eyes widening. āBloody hellāā He grabbed a towel from the closet and pressed it into your hands before you could even drip onto the rug.
āTake a shower. Now,ā he said firmly, another towel already tossed over your shoulders. āYouāll catch a cold if you stay like that.ā
You blinked up at him, water dripping from your lashes, lips curving into a small, surprised smile. āYou sound like my grandma.ā
āDonāt argue,ā he muttered, turning toward the kitchen. āGo. Iāll make you tea.ā
And you didāheart thudding at the thought of him in there, waiting with a steaming mug when you came back warm and dry.
The second time, it was the couch
Youād meant to just rest your eyes for a second, the script still open on your lap as you curled up on the couch. But when Harry came back into the living room, he found you fast asleep, cheek smushed against the cushion, soft breaths evening out.
For a long moment, he just stood there, frozen.
Then, carefully, quietly, he slipped into your room and returned with your blanket. He shook it out once, then draped it gently over you, making sure it tucked around your shoulders.
You stirred, shifting slightly under the sudden warmth, but didnāt wake.
Harry lingered only a second longer, watching the way your lips parted in sleep, the faint crease between your brows softening as you relaxed deeper. Then he turned off the lamp, leaving just the glow of the hallway light behind, and disappeared back to his room.
You didnāt know why you woke up the next morning with your blanket around you. But you smiled when you did.
š
The door rattles open and you glance up from the couch just in time to see Harry come in, shoulders hunched from the late evening chill, arms weighed down with two grocery bags. His curls are damp at the edges, a sure sign he walked the last blocks in a fine drizzle, and thereās something about the way he kicks the door shut behind him, exhaling like the weight of the day is still clinging to him, that makes you smile.
āLet me helpā you say, standing and automatically moving toward him.
He shrugs, setting one of the bags on the counter with a heavy thud. āItās fineā he says.
You reach for the other bag before he can protest, pulling out a carton of milk, a loaf of bread, a pack of pasta. āStill,ā you say, lining them neatly on the counter. You shake your head at the way he always fusses with the smallest things, then reach deeper into the bag ā and freeze.
Because tucked between his usual oat milk and black coffee beans, you find it. Your cereal. The one brand you always keep on the top shelf, half-hidden because it feels a little childish. And right after that, your favorite kind of chips. The exact flavor youād torn through last week.
You turn, eyes widening, the box in your hand like evidence. āHarry,ā you say, your voice pitched higher than you intend, āyou bought my cereal.ā
He glances over, expression unreadable, like maybe he hadnāt expected you to notice so soon. Then, with a casual roll of his shoulders, he says, āSaw you were running low.ā
Thatās it. No grin, no joke, no acknowledgment of what it means. Just a quiet, almost dismissive explanation, like heād picked up a spare roll of paper towels.
But your chest tightens, because you know him well enough now to read between the lines. You know this man who insists he doesnāt care much about details but somehow notices when youāre down to your last coffee pod, who pretends he doesnāt listen yet recalls every small thing you mention. You know, and your heart beats faster because of it.
āYou noticed?ā you ask softly, unable to keep the excitement from lacing your words.
Harry exhales a laugh through his nose, reaching for the bread as if that might save him from answering. āHard not to. You have a whole ritual with it every morning. Box was nearly empty yesterday.ā
Thereās a warmth in his tone he doesnāt seem aware of, a fondness tucked into the edges. You canāt stop staring at him, at the way his profile looks in the golden kitchen light, jaw tight like heās holding something back.
You want to tease him ā you want to say, Since when do you pay that much attention to me? ā but the words stick in your throat, too fragile to risk. Instead you smile, wide and giddy, and tuck the cereal against your chest like a prize.
Harry finally looks at you then, eyes flicking to your grin, and for a fleeting second his calm mask falters. His lips twitch as though he might smile too, then he clears his throat, busying himself with lining cans in the cupboard.
But the air has shifted. You can feel it humming in the space between you, charged and bright.
āThank you,ā you say at last, voice softer than before.
He shrugs again, but slower this time, like the gesture costs him something. āDonāt mention it.ā
And in that silence, something clicks in you.
This isnāt about groceries. Itās not about cereal or chips or keeping track of whatās running low. Itās about him seeing you. About the way he canāt help but take care of you, even if he doesnāt have the words for why.
And maybe itās about you too ā the way your pulse races, the way youāre suddenly warm all over at the thought that Harry notices, that Harry cares.
You bite your lip to keep from laughing, because the happiness bubbling inside feels too much, too obvious. But he hears it anyway, the little sound that escapes, and he glances back with raised brows.
āWhatās funny?ā he asks.
You shake your head quickly, grinning like you canāt stop. āNothing.āĀ
Harry studies you, long enough that you almost squirm under his gaze. Then, to your shock, his mouth curves into the smallest, softest smile. The kind you havenāt seen from him before. And itās enough to make your breath catch, because you realize he isnāt annoyed, he isnāt brushing you off. Heās letting you see it ā the quiet, hidden piece of him that wants to make you happy.
And standing there in your shared kitchen, surrounded by groceries and rain-damp air, you know: this is how it begins.
š
Harry stood frozen at the edge of the sidewalk, staring at the flower shop window like it had personally offended him. Bouquets of bright pink peonies and sunbursts of yellow tulips smiled back through the glass, an explosion of color against the gray street. He adjusted his leather jacket, jaw tight.
āThis is ridiculous. Iām going.ā He muttered it more to himself than anyone, already shifting his weight as if he could walk away from the whole idea.
Before he could move, Sam caught his arm, grip firm. āNope. Not a chance.ā
Harry turned, glaring at his best friend. Sam only raised a brow, smug. The two of them ā tall, dressed in black, boots scuffed from late nights in dingy bars ā looked wildly out of place lingering outside a flower shop. Like predators afraid of bouquets.
āYou heard me,ā Sam went on, nodding toward the cheerful window display. āShe just finished her first big project. You need a way to say you care. To show her youāre proud. That you want to celebrate her.ā His grin widened as Harryās scowl deepened. āThat you liiike he-e-er.ā The last words came in a sing-song tone that made Harry want to sink into the pavement.
āShut up,ā Harry snapped, heat creeping up the back of his neck. āI donāt like her.ā
Samās gaze flicked to Harryās cheeks, now faintly pink. āMm-hm,ā he said, drawing the sound out like it was a verdict. āSure you donāt.ā
Harry jerked his arm free, but he didnāt move away. He looked back at the flower shop, heart thudding. Inside, a florist was rearranging a bucket of roses, humming to herself. It should have been simple: walk in, pick something, leave. But every single bunch looked like it might scream too much or not enough.
He rubbed a hand across his jaw. āWhat flowers do you even buy for⦠a literal flower?ā The words slipped out, low and almost pained.
Sam burst out laughing, earning a glare sharp enough to cut glass. āOh, thatās rich. Manās out here buying her favorite snacks one week and canāt figure out if daisies are too obvious.ā
Harry shoved his hands into his pockets, muttering, āForget it. She doesnāt even like this kind of thing.ā
āOh, she does,ā Sam countered immediately. āSheās the type to light up over something thoughtful, doesnāt matter if itās a fifty-dollar bouquet or one daisy wrapped in paper.ā
Harry exhaled slowly, eyes flicking back to the flowers. He could already imagine your smile if he got it right ā that warm, unstoppable kind that made his chest ache. And that was the problem.
Sam gave him a push toward the door. āGo on. Worst case, you leave with nothing but pollen on your jacket. Best case⦠she keeps smiling at you.ā
Harry hesitated, but his hand found the shopās door handle anyway.
The little bell over the door chimed as Harry stepped inside, shoulders tense like heād walked into enemy territory instead of a flower shop. The air was thick with perfume ā roses, lilies, carnations, all blending into something both sweet and overwhelming. He shoved his hands deeper into his pockets, scanning the room like he might find a sign that said For Sunshine, Buy These. Because of course he started to call her sunshine in his mind.
The florist, a woman in her fifties with kind eyes and pruning shears tucked in her apron, glanced up. āLooking for something special?ā
Harry cleared his throat. āUh⦠yeah. Something like that.ā His voice came out rougher than intended.
Sam was already poking around the displays behind him, whistling, enjoying every second of Harryās discomfort.
The florist tilted her head. āAnniversary? Birthday?ā
Harryās jaw flexed. He hated this. Hated how easily the question made his pulse spike. āNo. Just⦠congratulations.ā
āOn what?ā she asked pleasantly.
He hesitated. Saying her first big film went well out loud felt like exposing too much. Like admitting that he listened to you when you talked about your dreams, that he stored the details away. He shifted his weight. āWork thing.ā
āGot it.ā She smiled knowingly. āSomething cheerful, then. Something that says Iām proud of you.ā
She guided him toward a bucket of sunflowers, tall and golden, their faces practically glowing. Harry stopped dead, staring at them. Sunflowers. Too on the nose. Too obvious.
Sam sidled up beside him, grin wide. āPerfect. Literal sunshine for your sunshine.ā
Harry gave him a look that could kill. āNo.ā
He turned away, landing on a bunch of white daisies. Simple. Fresh. Not too heavy with meaning. But then his eyes caught on a cluster of yellow tulips, soft and elegant, like bottled warmth. Then there were the roses ā classic, romantic, dangerous.
āThis is a nightmare,ā he muttered under his breath.
The florist chuckled, watching him circle like a trapped animal. āWhatās she like?ā
Harry blinked. āWhat?ā
āThe person youāre buying for. Whatās she like? That usually helps.ā
For a moment, his throat went dry. What were you like? He could list a thousand things, all of them lodged in his chest. You were bright. Brave. You filled a room without even trying. You had this way of making silence feel less heavy. You made him laugh when he thought he couldnāt anymore.
āSheāsā¦ā He swallowed hard. āSheās a lot. In a good way.ā
The floristās smile deepened. āThen you need something that wonāt be swallowed by her light. Something that will stand beside it.ā
Her hand landed on a bunch of mixed wildflowers ā yellows, whites, soft pinks, all tangled together like summer in a bouquet. Not too polished, not too formal. Just⦠alive.
Sam leaned close, whispering, āIf you donāt get those, I will.ā
Harry sighed, shoving a hand through his hair. āFine.ā
When the florist wrapped the bouquet in brown paper, tying it off with twine, Harryās stomach twisted. It felt like too much and not enough all at once. He paid quickly, muttering a thanks, and bolted out into the street before he could change his mind.
Sam followed, smirking. āYouāre so gone for her, man.ā
āShut up,ā Harry said again, but this time the words lacked bite. He held the flowers carefully in one hand, staring at them like they might reveal whether this was a mistake.
š
By the time Harry reached the apartment building, his palms were damp against the brown paper wrapping. The bouquet crinkled softly every time he adjusted his grip, and it drove him mad how fragile it felt in his hand ā how fragile he felt, standing there with something so bright meant for you.
He stopped outside the door to 301, heart thudding in his ears. The hallway was quiet, save for the hum of the overhead lights. He shifted his weight from one boot to the other, jaw tight, the words he thought heād say looping in his head and tangling every time.
Congrats. That sounds stupid. You deserve these. Too much. Saw these and thought of you. Christ, no. Sheāll know. Sheāll know.
Harry scrubbed a hand over his face, muttering under his breath. āItās flowers, not a bloody marriage proposal.ā
Still, his chest tightened every time he pictured your reaction. Would you laugh? Tease him? Smile that blinding smile and make him feel like he was standing in the sun without a way to shield himself?
He tried to rehearse it again.
Hey, you did good. Proud of you. The words burned his tongue even in thought. Pride wasnāt something he knew how to hand out. Not even to himself.
He took a deep breath, staring at the door handle like it might bite him. He could still turn back. Leave the flowers on the kitchen counter, no note, no explanation. Youād find them and never know it took him ten minutes of pacing in the hallway to gather the courage.
But something in him ā the same reckless thread that had pushed him onto stages, that had kept him from walking away the first time he saw your smile ā held him there.
Harry tightened his grip on the bouquet, exhaled slowly, and muttered, āAlright. Just⦠donāt be a dick about it.ā
Then, finally, he turned the key and stepped inside.
You were sitting cross-legged on the couch, laptop balanced on your knees, still buzzing from the last few texts your best friend had sent congratulating you. The front door clicked open, and you glanced up. Harry stepped in, shoulders hunched, leather jacket half-unzipped, a bouquet of wildflowers in his hand like it was a weapon he didnāt know how to wield.
Your eyes widened instantly. āOh my god⦠are thoseā?ā
He cleared his throat, eyes flicking everywhere but at you. āHeard the short film closed well and, uh, wanted to⦠congratulate you. To likeāā He winced, adjusting his grip on the flowers. āBe proud. I meanāI am proud. Like⦠yeah.ā His voice trailed off into a mumble.
Your heart soared so hard it nearly hurt. Harry. Harry, who never said more than a few clipped words if he could help it, was standing there in your living room, cheeks faintly pink, tripping over sentences just to tell you he was proud.
You practically flew off the couch, grabbing the flowers before he could change his mind. The brown paper crinkled under your fingers, and the colors of the wildflowers were so bright they looked stolen from a dream. āHarry! These are gorgeous!ā
He scratched the back of his neck, lips twitching like he was fighting a smile. āTheyāre just⦠flowers.ā
āNo, no, theyāre not just flowers,ā you insisted, spinning once with the bouquet clutched to your chest. āTheyāre beautiful, and theyāre thoughtful, andāā you stopped mid-sentence, breathless with excitement. āCan I hug you? Please let me!ā
Harry froze. You saw the hesitation flicker across his face, like his brain was trying to process the request through a hundred filters of rules and walls and distance. But then his shoulders dropped just slightly, the fight leaving him.
āYeah,ā he said quietly, almost like he was giving permission to himself more than to you.
You didnāt wait a second longer. You wrapped your arms around him, burying your face against his chest, the flowers squished between you both. He smelled like rain and coffee and something distinctly him. For a moment, his arms hovered awkwardly at his sides, and thenāslowly, cautiouslyāthey came up to hold you back.
The hug lingered longer than you thought it would. You could feel his heartbeat against your cheek, steady but a little fast, and it made you smile even wider. When you finally pulled back, you kept bouncing on your toes, clutching the bouquet like it was the most precious thing anyone had ever given you.
āHarry, I love them so much. You donāt understand. No oneās ever given me flowers before, not like this. And you remembered about the short film! And you said youāre proud, oh my godādo you know how much that means? I swear my heart is going to explode right now. And we have to see the short film together!ā
You were rambling, words spilling out faster than you could control, but you didnāt care. The happiness was too much to hold in, and you wanted him to feel all of it.
Harryās ears were pink, his lips pressed into a thin line like he was trying desperately to keep them from twitching into a smile. āYouāre⦠youāre making a big deal out of it,ā he muttered, gaze darting to the floor.
āIt is a big deal!ā you insisted, hugging the bouquet tighter. āItās huge. Itāsāyouāre huge, in like, the nicest way possible. Do you realize how sweet this is?ā
He gave a tiny huff of breath, almost a laugh, and dragged a hand down his face. āChrist, youāre loud when youāre happy.ā
But you caught itāthe way his voice was softer, lighter than usual, like he wasnāt actually annoyed. His hand lingered on the back of his neck, nervous, but his eyes flicked to yours and didnāt look away as quickly as they usually did.
āSorry,ā you said through a grin you couldnāt tame. āI just canāt stop smiling. Youāve basically ruined me for the rest of the night. Iāll probably go to sleep smiling, thanks to you.ā
That earned you another almost-laugh, the sound breaking past his defenses before he could stop it. It was small, quick, but it was there, and your chest lit up like fireworks.
You gasped dramatically. āOh my god, was that a laugh? Did I just make Harry laugh AGAIN?ā
āDonāt push it,ā he warned, but there was no edge in his voice this time.
You held the bouquet up between you both, wiggling it slightly. āNew rule,ā you teased, your eyes bright. āYouāre not allowed to say youāre not sweet. Evidence: right here.ā
Harry rolled his eyes, but you didnāt miss the way his lips curled at the edges, traitorous and soft. And you thought, maybe, just maybe, you were starting to find the cracks in his walls.
You darted off to the kitchen to rummage for a vase, humming happily under your breath, the bouquet cradled like treasure. Harry stayed rooted where he stood, watching you move around with that unstoppable glow in your smile, and something inside him shifted so sharply he almost stumbled.
The walls he had spent years stacking brick by brickārules, silence, distanceāfelt flimsy now, like paper left out in the rain. All because you had looked at him with that much joy over something as simple as a bunch of flowers.
He let out a low chuckle, surprising even himself. It wasnāt the short, bitter sound he usually made. It was lighter, easier. And in that moment, he realized there wasnāt a better feeling in the world than putting that smile on your face.
Harry leaned against the doorway, arms crossed loosely but no tension in his shoulders, watching you arrange the wildflowers into a vase far too small, your tongue sticking out a little in concentration. His lips twitched upward again, the warmth curling in his chest so foreign it almost scared him.
Bloody hell, he thought, shaking his head at himself, but he couldnāt look away.
And for the first time in years, Harry didnāt feel like hiding.
The flowers were still on the counter days later, their petals unfurling lazily toward the sun that spilled through the apartment windows. You made a habit of topping up the water every morning before rushing out to run errands, humming like you always did. Harry noticed. He noticed more than he cared to admit.
Because every time he passed the vase, he felt the faintest tug in his chestālike a reminder of how your eyes had lit up when heād handed them over. He hadnāt meant it to mean anything, hadnāt thought through the weight of the gesture. But the memory of your grin lodged itself inside him, stubborn as ever.
Harry had never been good at lingering feelings. He was used to shutting doors before they creaked open, keeping people at armās length with clipped words and that hardened look that usually made strangers back away. But now, somehow, his sharp edges felt dulled around you. And worseāhe didnāt hate it.
Then one day he found himself outside your audition building. He hadnāt planned it, not really. He had errands to run downtown, but when his phone buzzed with your quick textāHeading in now, wish me luck!āhis feet had moved on their own.
He leaned against the brick wall across the street, cap tugged low, trying to look casual even though his stomach felt oddly tight. He wasnāt even sure what he was waiting for. Maybe to make sure you didnāt walk out looking defeated. Maybe just to⦠see.
And sure enough, twenty minutes later you appeared, clutching your bag, your shoulders slumped just slightly. Not devastated, just tired. He almost turned backāalmost let you walk home without knowing he was there. But then you spotted him.
āHarry?ā you asked, surprise lifting your voice.
He shrugged, forcing a lazy smirk. āDonāt look so shocked. I was nearby.ā
Your eyes softened instantly, the tiredness draining as quickly as it had come. āYou came.ā
āDonāt make a big deal of it.ā But it was a big deal, and you knew it. The smile you gave him in returnāit was softer than the one you wore when you were excited, but just as powerful. Something in him unclenched again.
It started happening in small ways after that.
He brewed an extra cup of tea in the mornings, leaving it on the counter beside your travel mug without a word. You always noticed. He began timing his grocery runs around yours, carrying the heavier bags without you asking. When you protested, he muttered something about how your arms were too scrawny for the weight, but his grin betrayed him.
Even his silences changed. Before, they had been sharp, pointed, a barrier between him and the world. Now they were softer. Sometimes he lingered in the kitchen while you cooked, leaning against the counter, just listening to you ramble about your day. He didnāt always answer, but his eyes stayed fixed on you in a way that made your cheeks burn.
And you noticed. Of course you did.
By the end of the week, the flowers on the counter had begun to wilt. Their petals curled, drooping against the glass. You went to toss them, but Harry stopped you.
āLeave āem,ā he said quietly.
You tilted your head. āTheyāre dying, Harry.ā
His jaw flexed, like he was fighting with himself, then he let out a sigh. āStill pretty, though. Donāt need to get rid of āem just yet.ā
You blinked at him, caught off guard by the softness in his tone. Something unspoken passed between you, thick in the air.
The apartment felt quiet when you came home that night, the city noises muted behind the closed door. Your shoulders sagged with the weight of the dayāanother audition that hadnāt gone as planned, another reminder that the road ahead was harder than youād imagined. You just wanted to collapse onto your bed and disappear under the covers.
But before you could even cross the threshold to your room, Harry appeared from the kitchen, eyes soft but sharp, like he could read every ounce of your fatigue and disappointment the moment you stepped inside.
āYouāre home early,ā he said, voice calm, but there was an edge of⦠concern? Anticipation? You couldnāt quite place it.
You barely managed a shrug. āYeah⦠rough day.ā
He tilted his head, that familiar furrow in his brow settling, and the corners of his lips twitched ever so slightly. āSit down,ā he said, almost a command. āIām making dinner.ā
You froze for a moment, unsure if you should protest, but the look in his eyesāsomething protective, insistentāmade you sink into a chair at the counter. He moved around the kitchen with surprising ease, chopping vegetables, stirring sauces, setting the table. And all the while, your chest warmed at the way he seemed to⦠notice you, notice everything.
It wasnāt just dinner. It was the effort, the timing, the small attention to detail that made you feel like he wanted to take the dayās weight off your shoulders, even if he didnāt say it outright.
Finally, he plated the food with care, sliding a dish in front of you. āFor sunshine,ā he said, almost shyly, but with enough confidence that you felt it in your chest before your mind even processed it.
You blinked, a laugh escaping your lips before you could stop it. āDid you just?...ā
He shifted, cheeks coloring faintly, but he didnāt address the nickname. Instead, he placed a plate in front of himself, muttering under his breath, āFor me,ā though his eyes kept flicking to yours, trying not to betray the fluster creeping across his face.
Your fingers itched to reach across the table and touch his hand, just to confirm he was real, and that he had called you that. You smiled so wide it felt like your cheeks would hurt later.
He rolled his eyes, pretending to check the pasta on his plate, though the corner of his mouth betrayed a tiny, victorious grin. āDonāt make it weird,ā he murmured, voice low, but there was no sharpness in it this time.
Your heart thudded. Weird? Thatās exactly what it wasābut the best kind of weird. The kind that made your chest feel light, like you could laugh and cry and grin all at once.
You reached for your fork, but couldnāt resist sneaking a glance at him every few seconds, catching the subtle tension in his shoulders, the way his jaw flexed as if holding back words or feelings. You didnāt have to say anythingāheād made himself clear in the softest way possible.
And as you ate, you realized something: Weeks of slow, careful pacing had allowed this moment to exist, allowed him to start showing his feelings in the smallest, most intimate ways. You hadnāt pushed, hadnāt demanded, and in return, he was giving pieces of himself that no one else had ever gotten.
The two of you ate in quiet companionship, the kind that didnāt need constant chatter, the kind where glances and half-smiles said more than words could. You felt warmth in your chest, a smile tugging at your lips, because thisāthis effort, this subtle affectionāwas far more meaningful than any grand gesture.
When the last bite was gone, he finally looked up at you, eyes soft but alive. āYou like it?ā he asked quietly, almost as if asking for permission to care this much.
You nodded, heart swelling. āI love it. Thank you⦠for everything,ā you said, voice catching slightly.
Harryās lips twitched, and for the first time, you heard the sound of him laughingāa low, easy chuckle that felt like it belonged only to you. You blinked, surprised and elated, and that laughter wrapped around you, lifting away the tension of the day.
š
The nickname had started to settle into your days, quiet and teasing, but every time you saw it, your chest did that little flutter.
One afternoon, your phone buzzed while you were curled up on the couch reading. You picked it up and grinned.
Harry: āSunshine, Iām at the Chinese place. Do you want spicy or not spicy?ā
You rolled your eyes, but the smile didnāt leave your face.
āSpicy please!ā
.
A few days later, you were doing laundry together in the cramped laundry room of the apartment building. You were folding your clothes into neat piles when Harry appeared behind you, holding a shirt in his hands.
āSunshine,ā he said, voice calm but eyes narrowing in mock suspicion. āIs this shirt yours?ā
You froze for a second, caught off guard. āOh yes! unless you want to wear a pink shirt i can lend it to youā
.
Over the next week, it became harder to keep track of how often he used it.
āSunshine, can you grab some coffee with me later or do I need to bribe you?ā
āSunshine, your favorite yogurt is on the counter. Donāt eat it all in one sitting.ā
.
You werenāt in the room, but Harryās thoughts were tangled with you so tightly that even the familiar clatter of his bandmates backstage couldnāt shake it. He leaned against the counter, guitar case propped nearby, as Sam pulled up a stool beside him, arms crossed.
āYouāre an idiot,ā Sam said bluntly, shaking his head. āSeriously, Harry. Sunshine? Really? Youāre calling her Sunshine and doing⦠what? Nothing?ā
Harry snorted, but it came out tight, defensive. āItās⦠not that simple.ā
āOh, come on,ā Sam continued, leaning closer, voice dropping. āYouāve been staring at her like sheās the only person in the world since day one. You call her Sunshine, you text her like sheās the most important person in your life, and then you⦠donāt move. Donāt ask her out, donāt kiss her, donātāā
Harry rubbed the back of his neck, jaw tight. āI donāt know if she⦠I mean⦠Iām not sure sheāā
Sam barked a short laugh, cutting him off. āSheās not going to push. Sheās too smart for that. Youāve got a girl whoās clearly fallen for you without you even asking, and youāre just⦠sitting there, letting her wait. For what? For you to figure out how to be brave?ā
āIāshe doesnāt even knowā¦ā Harry muttered, then trailed off, shaking his head.
Sam slammed a hand on the counter. āShe doesnāt know because youāre not acting like someone who wants to be with her! Sheās giving you space, Harry, because she can read you. Sheās not stupidāshe knows youāre figuring yourself out. But that doesnāt mean sheās going to wait forever. And you? Youāre losing your chance because you canāt admit you want her as much as she clearly wants you.ā
Harry stared down at the counter, chest tight. āItās not that I donāt want her. I⦠I justāā
āJust what?ā Sam pressed, eyebrow raised. āYouāre in love with her, arenāt you?ā
Harry let out a breath, the sound almost inaudible over the low hum of the bar. āI⦠maybe I am,ā he admitted, voice low, almost a whisper. āBut what if she⦠what if she deserves more than⦠me? What if Iām not ready?ā
Sam laughedāharsh, incredulous, but full of exasperation. āHarry, sheās giving you everything sheās got without asking for anything in return. And youāre going to let your stupid fears get in the way of that? Sheās already letting you in, Harry. Sheās already letting you see her, trust her. And youāre over here pretending youāre not just as messed up as she is.ā
Harry closed his eyes, jaw flexing. āItās not just fear. I⦠I donāt want to screw it up. Iāve neverānever let anyone in like this.ā
Sam leaned back, hands on his hips, voice softer now but still firm. āThen stop overthinking. Be honest. Stop hiding behind your grumpy wall. Sheās waiting, yeah, but sheās also not going to wait forever. You need to act. And right now, while sheās still smiling at your stupid little jokes and calling her āSunshineā without a clue that youāre a mess for herāyou need to do something. Or youāll regret it.ā
Harry let out a long breath, leaning back against the counter. His mind was spinning, a mix of panic and longing. Do something. That simple phrase echoed, hitting him harder than he expected.
š
The bar was buzzing that night, louder than usual, packed with bodies swaying to the music and laughter spilling into every corner. You slipped inside, excitement practically vibrating through your chest. Even in the crowd, you found your usual spot in the first row, close enough to see the faint sheen of sweat on Harryās forehead as he tuned his guitar.
Your heart was racing for more than just the music. Youād told yourself to keep it casual, just congratulating him, letting him know you were proud. But now, standing here in the thrumming energy of the crowd, you felt every nerve in your body tingle.
The lights dimmed, the chatter quieted, and Harry and his band launched into their first song. The sound hit you like a wave, the guitar warm and alive under his fingers, the drums steady and grounding. You sang along quietly under your breath, a little off-key, a little breathless, but entirely immersed.
Harryās eyes caught yours during the second chorus. That flicker, that subtle acknowledgment, made your chest tighten. His lips quirked up in a small, almost shy smileāsweat glistening on his forehead, his hair sticking slightly to the side of his faceāand it made your heart thump faster.
The songs flew by, each one tighter, sharper, more electric than the last. You cheered, clapped, and swayed with the crowd, but your focus never wavered. You were there for him, for the music, but also for the man behind itāthe one who had somehow worked his way into the corners of your thoughts, the one who called you Sunshine in a way that made your stomach flip.
Finally, the set ended. The crowd roared, hands clapping, whistles and cheers echoing through the small bar. Harryās chest heaved slightly as he nodded to the band, brushing his hair back and taking in the applause. And youāwell, you couldnāt wait for him to come to you. Waiting felt unbearable.
So, without thinking too much, you ducked through the side door that led backstage, weaving between cables, guitar cases, and scattered sheets of music. The air smelled of sweat and wood polish, still warm from the energy of the show. And then you saw him.
He was leaning against a table, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand, guitar strap slipping slightly off one shoulder, chest still rising and falling rapidly from adrenaline. You couldnāt help but grin, practically bouncing in place.
āHarry! That wasāoh my goshāyou guys were amazing! Seriously, Iāve never seen anything like itāyour energy, the sound, theāā You babbled, words tumbling over each other, cheeks flushed from excitement and heat.
He lifted his hand, gently but firmly holding it against your shoulder, stopping you mid-rant. āWhoa, hey,ā he said, voice low but warm, eyes searching yours. āIāI heard you from the crowd⦠what are you doing here?ā
You nodded vigorously, cheeks still burning. āI had to! I justāI had to tell you⦠You were incredible! The whole band, the new songs, everything! I canāt evenāā
And then, almost before you could catch the breath in your chest, his hands found your face, quick but steady.
Your words froze in your throat as his lips clashed against yours, soft but urgent, shutting down everything you were about to say. You felt his heartbeat thump against your own, a rapid, uncontainable rhythm that made your chest ache in the best way possible.
It was over in seconds, but those seconds were infinite. When he finally pulled back slightly, forehead resting against yours, eyes dark and luminous, you could barely breathe. His hands lingered, fingers lightly tracing your jaw, and he exhaled, almost a sigh of relief.
āI couldnāt⦠I couldnāt wait anymore,ā he muttered, voice hoarse but steady, eyes locked on yours. āYou⦠you make meāeverything else doesnāt matter when youāre here.ā
You blinked, still catching your breath, and then the grin spread across your face, unstoppable. āYou really mean that?ā you whispered, voice trembling with joy and disbelief.
He nodded, leaning in again for a soft brush of lips, more tentative this time, like he was testing the water before diving in. āEvery word,ā he said, and you could feel the sincerity wrapping around you like a warm blanket.
You laughed softly, a sound of pure delight, and your fingers curled around his wrists, grounding yourself to him, to the moment. āI think⦠I think Iāve wanted this for forever,ā you admitted, heart pounding in your chest. āSeeing you up there, doing what you love, and⦠and knowing Iām here with youāitās too much happiness for one person.ā
Harryās grin was slow and deliberate, the kind that crumbled walls and set everything on fire at once. āWell⦠guess Iām selfish then,ā he murmured, pressing another quick kiss to your forehead, ābecause I want all of it. You. Me. Right here. Right now.ā
You felt yourself melt into him, laughing softly at his words, at his seriousness, at the way this moment, this utterly chaotic, perfect, heart-thumping moment, felt like it had always been meant to happen.
He pulled back just slightly, forehead resting against yours again, hands still cradling your face. āI donāt know how I kept quiet for so long,ā he admitted, voice almost a whisper. āSeeing you⦠being here, cheering me on⦠it justāit made it impossible. Youāre everything, Sunshine.ā
You shivered, caught between disbelief and pure happiness, heart racing so fast it was almost painful. āIām so glad⦠you didnāt,ā you said softly, brushing your fingers against his jaw.
His laugh, that soft, almost nervous chuckle youād come to adore, broke through. āYeah,ā he said, voice still trembling slightly, ābecause I⦠I think Iām in trouble now.ā
You laughed too, breathless and giddy, pressing your lips to his once more, slower this time, savoring the sweetness and heat of it, letting yourself sink fully into the moment. The music from the stage faded behind you, the world outside blurred into insignificance.
Here, in this warm, sticky backstage room, amidst sweat and cables, the two of you existed entirely for each other. And for the first time, you both let go of every hesitation, every wall, every unspoken fear, surrendering to what had been building quietly between you for weeks.
When you finally pulled back, both of you breathing heavily, Harry rested his forehead against yours again, eyes soft but sparkling. āYouāre really⦠something else, Sunshine,ā he murmured, voice rough with emotion and amusement.
You grinned, heart soaring. āI could say the same about you,ā you whispered. āBut I think⦠I think I already know.ā
And as he leaned in for one more kiss, just soft and lingering this time, you realized that nothingāno awkwardness, no grumpy walls, no slow-burn tensionāhad ever felt so perfectly, completely right.
The ride home was quiet, both of you lost in the aftermath of what had just happened, the city lights streaking past the windows like sparks against the dark. Your fingers brushed once, then again, and neither of you pulled away.Ā
Once inside the apartment, the silence felt differentāwarmer, charged with something that wasnāt there before. You set your bag down by the door, glancing at him. He looked⦠vulnerable. A little unsure. That rough, grumpy facade softened into something else entirely, something open, something that made your chest flutter.
āUhā¦ā he started, scratching the back of his neck, gaze darting around like he was trying to find the words in the air. āSo⦠uh⦠youāwant something to drink? Or⦠or do you wantāā
You tilted your head, noticing the hesitation. āI⦠uh⦠Iām okay,ā you said softly, voice tentative, but there was a small smile on your lips. āYou?ā
He exhaled slowly, like heād been holding his breath. āYeah. Iām⦠good,ā he said, trying to sound casual, but the slight hitch in his tone betrayed him. His hands fidgeted with the hem of his shirt.
You could see it in the way he shifted from foot to foot, in the way his eyes kept flicking to your face. He wantedāneededāyou to be close, but didnāt know how to bridge that gap between the living room and the sanctuary of his bedroom.
āIāuhā¦ā He took a step forward, then stopped. āYou⦠you can⦠um⦠if you want, you can sleep in my room tonight. Or⦠I meanā¦ā His voice trailed off āIf thatās okay. I⦠I justā¦ā
You blinked, heart leaping at his words. āIād like that,ā you said softly, the excitement and warmth pooling in your chest making your words sound breathless.
His eyes widened just slightly, a mixture of relief and surprise. āRight. Okay. Yeah. Sure. Uh⦠come on then,ā he said, stepping aside to gesture toward the hallway, hands still slightly trembling at his sides.
You walked beside him, careful not to step too fast, letting the quiet tension settle around you. The apartment felt different nowānot just a space where you coexisted, but somewhere charged with new possibilities, charged with this strange, electric intimacy neither of you had dared to explore fully until now.
Once inside his room, you paused at the doorway, taking it all in. The soft lighting, the scattered music sheets, the guitar resting against the wallāit all felt like a glimpse into him, into the parts of Harry he rarely showed anyone. And now, here you were, allowed to be in it.
He cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. āUh⦠bedās, uh⦠big enough. I⦠I mean, you canāā
You grinned, stepping in closer. āI know.ā chuckling
He gave a short, almost nervous laugh, cheeks coloring faintly. āYeah.ā he muttered. āYou⦠you make yourself comfortable. I⦠Iāll⦠uh⦠get ready.ā
You watched as he shuffled toward his dresser, awkwardly fumbling with the sheets, avoiding your gaze, and you felt this strange, sweet tension settle between you. Neither of you wanted to make the first move too obvious, yet every small glance, every slight smile, every hesitant word carried meaning.
You slipped under the covers, hugging your knees, trying not to fidget too much, heart racing from both the adrenaline of the evening and the warmth of being this close to him. You could hear him moving, quietly, deliberately, preparing his side. Each creak of the floorboard, each soft shuffle made your chest flutter.
Finally, he settled beside you, a careful distance away, but close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating from him. The silence stretched, comfortable yet charged, until he finally whispered, voice low and careful, āYou⦠okay?ā
You nodded, smiling softly in the dim light. āYeah. Iām⦠perfect,ā you said. āWith you.ā
His lips curved into the tiniest grin, almost imperceptible, but it made your heart leap. He let out a small, almost relieved chuckle. āGood,ā he murmured. āBecause⦠I⦠yeah. Me too.ā
You let out a quiet sigh, staring at the ceiling for a moment, then, before you could stop yourself, you burst out laughing. A full, uninhibited laugh that made Harry blink at you in surprise.
āYou know,ā you said between giggles, turning slightly to face him, āweāre acting completely ridiculous. Both of us. Here, lying like a couple of teenagers, and weāre⦠I donāt knowā¦ā You shrugged, still laughing, the tension in your chest finally breaking.
Harryās jaw loosened, and a small, relieved chuckle escaped him. āYeahā¦ā he said softly, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
You couldnāt help yourselfāyou scooted closer, brushing against him in a casual, playful way. āRidiculous together,ā you added, grinning.
For a second, he froze, as if weighing the consequences of what to do next. And then, with a quiet determination that surprised even you, he shifted closer, letting his arm snake around your waist, pulling you gently into his chest. His head tucked just under your chin, careful but firm, as if anchoring himself to you while still testing the waters.
āI⦠uhā¦ā he mumbled against your hair, voice low and flustered, āI think Iām good hereā
You laughed again, letting your fingers trace lazy patterns over his arm. āLooks like youāre just finally admitting you want to cuddle.ā
His cheeks colored faintly, and he gave a small, sheepish laugh. āMaybe. Just⦠maybe,ā he admitted.
You snuggled against him, letting the warmth of his body seep into yours. āGood,ā you whispered, smiling against the curve of his shoulder. āBecause I think this is exactly where weāre supposed to be.ā
He chuckled, quiet but full of contentment, pulling you closer without a second thought. āYeah⦠yeah, youāre right,ā he echoed, the words soft but loaded with everything he hadnāt said yetāeverything he was feeling but still figuring out how to name.
Now, neither of you felt the need to overthink, to hesitate, to pretend to be brave. You were simply here, together, letting the closeness, the warmth, and the quiet joy of being with each other speak louder than any words ever could.
Over the next few weeks, a rhythm began to settle between you. It started smallāan arm brushing your waist as he settled in, a leg draping over yours almost absentmindedly. There was something comforting about letting him be needy, letting him rest his head against you like he had nowhere else in the world to be.
āSunshineā¦ā heād murmur in the half-light, voice hoarse from just waking or from some unspoken longing. āStay⦠just five more minutes.ā And youād laugh, letting him curl tighter against you, heart thudding in a way that left you dizzy with affection.
One night youād had a long day, auditions that went nowhere, and youād come home frustrated and exhausted. Harry was still at the bar, and you found yourself curling up under his blankets
When he came back, he paused in the doorway, watching you curled against his pillow, and a slow, genuine smile spread across his face. āYouāre⦠making yourself at home, huh?ā he teased softly, but the heat in his eyes told you he didnāt mean it as a joke.
You grinned sleepily. āItās your fault for having such comfy sheets.ā
He walked over, climbing onto the bed carefully, like he didnāt want to crush the tiny bubble of space youād claimed. And thenāwithout thinking, without hesitationāhe curled up behind you, chest pressing lightly against your back, one arm thrown over your waist. āYou⦠you smell like happiness,ā he whispered, voice low and husky. āAnd⦠I like it.ā
You giggled, squeezing his hand, heart fluttering at how unguarded he suddenly was. āYouāre ridiculous,ā you murmured.
He hummed, pressing his nose to the nape of your neck. āYeah⦠but Iām yours,ā he said softly, and you could feel the honesty in the words, the vulnerability that had been buried under weeks of grumpy, sarcastic walls. That night, he didnāt just take up space in your bedāhe let you take up space in his heart, too.
Over time, these small habits became a flow. One night in your bed, one night in his. Sometimes he was clingy and needy; sometimes you were the one clinging, wrapping your arms around him while he hummed softly against your hair. The nickname āSunshineā slipped into conversation naturally now, soft, teasing, and intimate.
One evening, after a long day where auditions had worn you thin, you found yourself on the sofa, sprawled out with a mug of tea, Harry settling beside you. You were laughing about some absurdity from the day, and his fingers found yours, entwining lazily. The warmth of his hand sent a shiver up your spine.
āI canāt believe you actually said that,ā he murmured, brushing a stray strand of hair from your face.
You leaned in closer, and without warning, he kissed you. Soft at first, testing, like he was still measuring the line between comfort and desire. You responded instinctively, lips parting, fingers tangling in his hair.
The kiss deepened, growing more urgent, more insistent. Your body pressed against his, heat pooling in your chest, in your stomach, in ways that made your breath hitch. And then, as his hands moved, you hesitatedāpulling back just slightly, heart thudding, eyes wide.
āHeyā¦ā he murmured, still close, his forehead resting against yours. āWhat is it?ā
You swallowed hard, cheeks flushing bright pink. āI⦠Iāve never⦠with anyone,ā you admitted, voice trembling, embarrassed. āI⦠I donāt knowā¦ā
Harryās eyes softened instantly, full of care and warmth, his hand cupping your cheek. āHey, hey,ā he said gently, brushing his thumb across your jaw. āItās okay. I⦠Iām not here to rush you. Never.ā
You breathed out, relief washing over you in a warm wave. āReally?ā
āReally,ā he said, voice steady but husky. ā⦠Iāll want to make you feel good. In all ways. From now on.ā
Your heart soared, and a shy, happy smile spread across your face. You nodded, pressing your lips to his in a gentle, lingering kiss, letting yourself trust him fully. He responded with a mixture of tenderness and desire, careful yet confident, guiding, attentive, letting you take the lead when you wanted, and holding you close when you needed it.
The heat built slowly, tenderly, as you explored the intimacy between you. His hands were gentle but purposeful, tracing lines along your body with a reverence that made you feel both safe and wanted. Every movement, every sigh, every whispered word from him was measured to comfort, to excite, to reassure.
By the time you finally pulled back, hearts racing and foreheads pressed together, the air around you felt electric. You laughed softly, breathless, and he mirrored you, chuckling low and warm.
āSunshineā¦ā he murmured, his voice thick with both amusement and desire. You smiled, curling against him, letting the weight of his arms hold you close.
āWe can try,ā you whispered, heart pounding.
āOnly if you want,ā he said softly, brushing his lips against yours.
āI want,ā you replied, certainty in your voice.
That was all he needed. Slowly, deliberately, his hand slid up your shirt, moving with care and patience, waiting for your signal to go further. His lips never left yours, the kiss open, intimate, tongues beginning to meet in a gentle dance. When he felt your shoulders relax, he cupped your bra, squeezing just slightly, getting a small, breathy moan from you.
He smiled into the kiss, reading every reaction, every little sound, knowing you were not only enjoying this but trusting him completely.
āHave you⦠touched yourself before?ā he murmured between breathy kisses, his other hand sliding your shirt upwards with deliberate gentleness.
āYes,ā you admitted, a little embarrassed, but you knew it was natural.
āGood,ā he whispered, voice low and warm. āTell me what you like, okay, Sunshine?ā His lips trailed to your neck, pressing soft, teasing kisses, gently sucking without leaving marks⦠not yet.
āMākay,ā you breathed, your heart racing, your body tingling at the careful attention he gave you, the slow, patient way he explored, always making sure you felt safe and desired.
Your shirt slid up easily, and he paused for a moment, taking in the sight of you in that delicate beige tulle bra. He could already see your nipples through the sheer fabric, perked and inviting, silently begging for attention.
He lifted his gaze to your face, just for a momentācheeks flushed, strands of hair sticking to your foreheadāevery detail of you was breathtaking, a true work of art. His fingers twitched lightly, wanting to trace every curve, every line, but he held back, savoring the view, letting the tension build, knowing how much you were trusting him.
He leaned in again, lips brushing the sensitive skin just above your bra, breathing warm against you. His fingers hovered for a moment at the edge of the tulle, teasingly light, waiting for you to shift, to give him permission to go further. Every little sigh, every subtle arch of your body told him exactly what you wanted, and he followed, patient, attentive.
āRelax, Sunshine,ā he whispered, voice low and husky, pressing a gentle kiss to your collarbone. āJust⦠let me take care of you.ā
You shivered, leaning into him instinctively, trusting him completely. His hands moved carefully, tracing the curve of your waist, sliding beneath the sheer fabric of your bra. He cupped you lightly, fingers pressing just enough to make you gasp softly, and he smiled against your skin, savoring your reaction.
āYou feel⦠amazing,ā he murmured, thumbs brushing over your nipples. āSo soft⦠so perfect.ā
Your hands found his shoulders, fingers gripping lightly as you closed your eyes, letting yourself melt under his touch. There was no rush, no pressureājust him, you, and the quiet rhythm of your shared breaths.
He pulled back slightly, tilting your chin with a gentle finger, his eyes searching yours. āTell me if itās too much⦠or if you want more.ā
āI⦠I like it,ā you breathed, cheeks still flushed, voice soft but full of trust. āI like⦠this. You.ā
His smile was slow, a mixture of pride, desire, and pure awe. "Good," he whispered, pressing another feather-light kiss to your lips. His fingers drifted to the hem of your biker shorts, his touch both a question and a promise as his hands slid slowly to the curve of your ass. "Can I take these off?"
"Yeah, but... can you take something off too?" you asked, the words feeling like a shy favor.
"Of course," he said, a soft apology in his tone. He pulled his shirt over his head with a smooth, easy motion. You had seen his naked torso before, his tattoos like a map across his skin, but in this moment, it felt so differentāso vulnerable and real. With your eyes closed, your hands shyly found his abs, tracing the lines as if you were trying to memorize them.
When he tugged at your shorts, you pushed your hips up to give him easy access. The sight of you had him in a state of awe; a pair of beige tulle thongs were all that remained, their sheer fabric making his brain feel like mush. He could see the faint outline of your pussy lips and the darkening wet patch blooming against the material. He felt his own dick twitch inside his briefs, now fully hard, and unzipped his jeans to get them off and get comfortable.
You snuck a peek at him too, the hard shape of his cock so clearly defined in his briefs. A mix of nerves and desire swirled inside you, even as your own muscles clenched in anticipation.
"Has anyone tried to eat you out, sunshine?" he asked, his voice low.
"No," you whispered.
"Would you let me?" he asked, his voice breathy with need as he looked at that wet patch like a starving man.
"Yes," you whispered, the word barely audible. A flicker of self-consciousness crossed your mind; you had shaved a few days ago, but a light stubble had already returned. He didn't seem to notice, and if he did, he didn't care. He simply knelt before you. You parted your legs on the sofa, and he began to press open-mouthed kisses against the thin fabric of your thong. His tongue found you, tasting your sweet juices through the sheer material. Your hands, seemingly on their own, found their way into his hair, gripping it softly. Your hips instinctively bucked just the slightest. The scene was gloriously messy, your slick wetness and his eager kisses, while his hand moved in a soft, steady caress along your thighs and waist.
"Harry..." you moaned, the sound catching in your throat. "Uh..."
A wave of sensation washed over you as he moved the thin, damp fabric to the side, his tongue making direct, intoxicating contact. You let out a soft cry, a sound that was half gasp, half moan. Your hips pushed downward, a small, involuntary push that he met with a low groan against your skin. The sound was so deep, so full of his own pleasure, that it made you feel powerful.
His hand left your thigh, sliding between your folds as a single finger circled your clitoris. You tangled your fingers deeper into his hair, holding on tight as the world began to shrink to just the feel of his mouth, his touch, and the consuming heat building deep within you.
He slurped, kissed, and lapped with his tongue, a low, satisfied sound rumbling in his throat. "Sunshine... your taste... is addictive," he managed to say, his voice thick and low. Hearing your next moan, he went faster with his tongue against your clit, your own moans growing louder in response.
"Harry," you cried, your eyes squeezed shut, feeling how incredibly close you were.
"It's okay... just do what you want," he breathed between his deep kisses. "You look so pretty from here, sunshine. A perfect pussy, all for me."
"Uh... fuck," you said, the raw word escaping you. Hearing you swear for the first time in that state stirred something new in him. And without warning, you felt itāthat intense heat consuming your body. You came with a loud moan, a wave of pleasure washing through you. It was a dizzying surprise to look down and realize, in your blissful haze, that he had slipped two fingers inside you. His tongue was still on your clit, his fingers deep inside, and your body was clenching around him, a perfect, unspoken agreement.
He pushed himself up and leaned in, capturing your mouth in a soft kiss. You could taste yourself on him, a sweet and carnal flavor that only sent another jolt of desire through you. You were still coming down from the high, your body humming, your breath coming in deep, uneven gasps.
"You're perfect, sunshine," he murmured against your lips. "You look so good like this." He groaned the words into the kiss, pulling you closer. His right hand slid from your thigh to your hip, his thumb tracing the curve of your bone. The look in his eyes held a new promiseāthat this was just the beginning.
He kissed you, and with a hand still inside his briefs, he began to pump his dick. You noticed immediately, your gaze dropping to the visible movement.
"Teach me," you breathed, the words escaping you as you looked at the glistening tip peeking out. He pulled his head back, his eyes searching yours for a moment.
"You sure? We don't have to go all the way today," he said, his voice gentle but thick with desire.
"But I want to try," you insisted, the words a mix of curiosity and need.
"Fuck, sunshine," he moaned softly, a blend of surrender and excitement. Without another thought, he took your hand and placed it on his. His briefs were discarded, and now it was both of you, your hand guided by his, pumping his hard cock. The heat of him was a shock against your skin, a warm, pulsing weight that felt both foreign and thrillingly right.
He leaned in, his forehead pressed against yours. "Keep going," he groaned. "Just... like that. Your hands feel so fucking good."
The praise made you bolder. Your movements became more deliberate, your grip just a little tighter. He kissed you, messy and urgent, his free hand tangled in your hair. Your heart raced, the feeling of his skin on yours, the raw, unspoken want was overwhelming.
He pulled back with a small groan, his eyes dark and unfocused. He slowly brushed his cock through your slick folds, the sensation making you gasp. "Do you want to feel it raw first?" he said, his breath ragged. "Just the tip, and then I'll put a condom on."
"Yeah," you said, your insides clenching again.
"Fuck," he swore, his dick twitching. "You're gonna feel so good."
He pushed the head slowly inside of you and groaned low, feeling your walls tighten around him. A flicker of pain crossed your face, and he immediately kissed your jawline. "Talk to me. Does it hurt? I won't push further."
"No, it's good." He pushed in a little more, then stopped, waiting. "Okay," you said, and he pushed again, his own groan leaving his mouth.
"You're so fucking tight." Once he was halfway inside, you both stayed, getting used to each other.
"Harry," you breathed, your body adjusting to the new fullness.
"Does it hurt? Do you want me to stop?" he asked, a frown of concern on his face.
"No, I want to feel you inside, all the way," you said. His cock twitched at your words.
"I'll go for a condom. Don't move," he said. You moaned, a low, yearning sound as he slid out, the sudden emptiness making you ache. Your eyes dropped to his cock, glistening with both of your fluids.
"The sensation will be a bit dull," he warned. He came back, put the condom on, and pushed back inside you, a bit quicker this time, groaning as he felt the new sensation.
"Slow," you said, flinching slightly.
He did as told, and once he was all the way in, you were both panting, his breath hot against your ear. "Are you okay sunshine?" he asked.
"Yeah."
He began to move, the friction a delicious mix of pain and pleasure. Your hands gripped his back, scratching him lightly. "Shit, that feels good," he groaned.
"More," you pleaded, wanting him deeper.
"Fuck, sunshine," he moaned, moving faster. The sounds he made were the hottest thing you'd ever heard, and you let out your own soft "uhs" and "ahs" in his ear. The thought of being inside you was all he needed, and your small sounds pushed him to the edge.
"Harry..." you said, gripping his hair. "Fuck... I'm close again, I'm sorry."
"Don't you even dare... uh!... say sorry," he said, not hiding his own imminent climax. "Come whenever you need to."
"Ah... Harry," you moaned, and then he circled your clit with his thumb. Your legs began to shiver, and a loud moan of release escaped you.
Seeing your face, feeling your walls clench around him, he buckled his hips in sync with your spasms and came into the condom, hot cum filling it as he squeezed his eyes shut and held your waist tight.
You both breathed, your bodies still connected in a shared haze of heat and satisfaction. He pulled out slowly, taking a moment to compose himself. The raw passion was fading, replaced by a deep tenderness. He looked at you, his eyes still dark but now soft and gentle, and he reached out to gently push a stray hair from your forehead.
"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice low and a little rough, a stark contrast to the rough moans from moments before.
"Yeah," you said, a small, genuine smile gracing your lips. You were still humming with the aftereffects of the climax, a quiet thrumming of pleasure under your skin. "More than okay."
He looked down, his gaze traveling over your body before meeting your eyes again. "Did anything hurt? At all?" The concern in his face was so real, so disarming. It wasnāt a perfunctory question; he genuinely needed to know.
"A little at first," you admitted, the honesty feeling easy between you now, "but it was fine. You went slow, just like you said." You reached for his hand, giving it a soft squeeze. "You were so good, Harry. You took such good care of me. Thank you"
His expression softened completely, a hint of a smile touching his lips. He leaned in and kissed you, this time a slow, lingering kiss that tasted of you and of the profound intimacy you'd just shared. There was no urgency, just a deep, abiding affection in the touch of his lips, then he suddenly scooped you up into his arms, bridal style.
"Hey!" you said, a surprised laugh escaping you as your arms went around his neck.
He just looked at you, a soft, loving smile on his face. "You're coming with me"
He carried you through the apartment, your head resting against his shoulder, your body still weak with pleasure and now cradled in his strength. You could feel the warmth of him, the steady beat of his heart against your chest. He gently set you down on the edge of his bed, the plush comforter feeling soft beneath you. You watched him disappear into the bathroom, and the sound of water running soon filled the quiet space, and then came back with a damp towel, and softly wiped you, making sure it was gentle.
āComeā he said placing the towel on the bedside table and offered you a hand, now in the bathroom the bath all filled and smelling a bit like peaches, he helped you inside and crouched on the side making sure you were comfortable in the warm water, looking, no, admiring your body. āfeels good?ā he said softly
āMmm yesā you said closing your eyes but then turned to look at him āArenāt you getting in?ā she asked
āIāll go take a shower in yours and then iāll fix you up some dinnerā he said kissing your forehead āThank you Sunshineā
You blinked and looked again at him āfor what?āĀ
āFor coming into my life and changing itā¦thanks for making it better, thanks for bringing sunshine into meā he said softly and kissed your hand.
requested! thank you. ā”
content: fluff, comfort, anxiety, established relationship
the week has been brutal. long hours, small disappointments, little things piling up until they feel like boulders. youāve kept it together the best you can, but tonight ā itās too much.
youāre sitting on the edge of the bed, shoulders hunched, trying to breathe through the tightness in your chest. when harry walks in, hair damp from the shower, he stops instantly.
ālove?ā his voice is soft, careful.
you shake your head quickly, swiping at your eyes. āitās nothing. justāā your voice cracks, betraying you.
heās beside you in a heartbeat, long arms wrapping around your frame. āshh, hey. donāt do that, donāt say itās nothing.ā his chin rests lightly on top of your head. ātalk to me. or donāt. just⦠let me hold you.ā
and you do. you collapse against him, the dam finally breaking. hot tears streak down your face as sobs shake your chest.
harry doesnāt flinch. he only pulls you tighter into him, one hand stroking your back, the other cradling your head. āyouāre alright, pet. iāve got you. just breathe with me, yeah? slow⦠like this.ā
you try, matching the rhythm of his chest rising and falling. it steadies you, little by little.
āmāsorry,ā you mumble into his shirt, voice muffled.
he tilts his head down, kissing your damp hair. ānone of that. donāt apologize for feeling, baby. not with me.ā
you sniffle, finally lifting your face to look at him. his green eyes are gentle, shining, like heās carrying the weight for you.
āthere you are,ā he murmurs, thumb brushing the tear tracks from your cheeks. āfirst time iāve seen you cry⦠wish it wasnāt ācause of a bad week. but iām glad you let me be here for it.ā
āyou donāt think iām pathetic?ā
he huffs softly, kissing your forehead. āpathetic? darling, youāre the strongest person i know. even strong people break down. especially strong people.ā
you manage a watery laugh, and his smile widens, proud of pulling even the tiniest joy from you.
ābetter,ā he says, tilting his forehead against yours. āmy only job tonight is making sure you breathe easier. so, how about tea? blanket? maybe iāll sing to you a little, hm?ā
you nod, tears easing, chest lighter. ājust⦠stay close?ā
āalways.ā he kisses you slow, lingering. āiāll hold you all night if you let me.ā
and he does ā tucked under the covers, your face against his chest, his heartbeat steady under your ear. every time your breath hitches, his hand rubs circles on your back, his lips finding your hair.
by the time sleep finally pulls you under, the bad week feels just a little smaller. because harryās arms make the world feel safe again.
Hi I am SO glad youāre okay! Please donāt feel guilty about not being on here!
Iām sorry you miscarried :( it doesnāt matter what decision you were going to take, itās your body in the end and it all hurts the same.
I can understand your decision on not telling your bf rn especially given the history with your previous (very shitty) ex. Though I would say telling him would be the best in terms of long term investment. Yes technically thereās nothing to worry about in terms of pregnancy but you still experienced this! It was real, all the emotions and everything! Plus it seems you may have been through it alone :( you deserve to have someone hear you and let you say it! You do not have to go through it alone!!! Please tell me to fuck off if Iām overstepping!
not overstepping at all! iāve been so alone in this, so i really do appreciate the support coming from here. i want to tell him, but i know it would break his heart, and if i have any part in being able to prevent that, i will. heās lost a child before further along in a past pregnancy years ago, and i know it still hurts him. i know that i can get through it on my own, itāll just take some time.
maybe iām being dramatic and possibly its just placebo but with these hormones (possibly) and working hospital security in this big ass downtown hospitalāiām gonna lose my marbles. like why are u being mean when im trying to HELP YOU
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thank u everyone for all the love for everything going on <3 it means so much! especially since iāve been inactive for so long. iām in this weird limbo currently, iām hoping that writing something will help me feel better, iām hoping to get something out even if itās small. thank u <3
Words: 2,260
Rating:Ā PG-13 | fluff (just a short little fluffy fluff, harry has an eventful night)
Type: Harry Styles x Reader
Taglist: @infinityxlovers @emlovesniallhoran @puzio19 @noellesarchive @pawmpkinnn @tillyshouse
ā Masterlist ā TaglistĀ āĀ
Harry was nervous, maybe the most nervous he had ever been before. Which is crazy because he had performed in front of thousands of people. He had done big tours, small tours, live TV, you name it. He owned his own company. He was Harry Styles for christās sake but he couldnāt think about that, no, because he was holding a secret, but little did he know, there was another secret that was going to be confessed tonight. One that was going to change his life forever.Ā
The roar of the crowd was a familiar symphony to Harry. Lights pulsed, music throbbed, and the energy of thousands of fans singing along to "As It Was" was a palpable force. Tonight, however, there was an extra layer of shimmering euphoria beneath the surface of his usual stage high. Just hours before, nestled in the quiet intimacy of their London flat, he had proposed to Y/N. Her tearful, joyous "yes" still echoed in his ears, a sweeter melody than any chart-topping hit. The ring, a vintage sapphire heād spent months searching for, gleamed on her finger, a silent promise of forever.
The evening had started like any other, with Y/N mentally ticking off the remaining tasks on her work agenda as she commuted home. The thought of a quiet night in, perhaps a takeaway and a movie with Harry, was a comforting one. But as she unlocked the door to their familiar London flat, a subtle shift in the atmosphere immediately caught her attention. Instead of the usual gentle hum of the city filtering through, there was an unusual hush, punctuated only by the soft, melodic strains of a hidden playlist.
As she stepped further inside, her eyes widened. The living room, typically a space of comfortable clutter, had been transformed into something out of a dream. Hundreds of flickering candles, varying in height and size, cast a warm, intimate glow that danced across the walls and ceiling. Their subtle vanilla scent mingled with the sweet, delicate fragrance of scattered rose petals that dusted the floor, leading a fragrant path towards the center of the room. It was a scene of breathtaking beauty, an orchestrated moment that stole her breath.
And then she saw him. Harry, usually so composed, so effortlessly suave, stood amidst the ethereal glow, a bundle of barely contained nervous energy. His hands, usually so steady, trembled ever so slightly as he reached for hers, his eyes, usually filled with a playful glint, now held a deep, profound vulnerability. A soft gasp escaped Y/N's lips, a mix of surprise and burgeoning understanding washing over her.
He gently pulled her closer, his gaze unwavering, and then, with a grace born of anticipation and a lifetime of unspoken dreams, he knelt. The vintage sapphire ring, a family heirloom he had meticulously researched and restored, glinted in the soft candlelight, a beacon of promise. He began to speak, his voice a low, earnest murmur, pouring out his heart with a raw honesty that moved her to her core. He spoke of their first meeting, a serendipitous encounter in a bustling coffee shop; of the quiet evenings spent sharing dreams and fears; of the countless small moments that had woven their two lives inextricably together. Every word was a testament to his absolute certainty, a meticulously crafted narrative of how every single moment had led him to this very point, to this unwavering desire to spend the rest of his life by her side.
Tears, hot and shimmering, welled in Y/N's eyes, blurring the candlelight around them. Her throat tightened with emotion, her heart swelling with an indescribable joy. She couldn't speak, her voice choked with the magnitude of the moment, but she didn't need to. Her eyes, shining with unshed tears, conveyed everything. She simply nodded, a slow, deliberate movement, before finally managing to push past the lump in her throat, a joyous "Yes!" escaping her lips, a sound that resonated with every fiber of her being.
The embrace that followed was one of pure, unadulterated bliss, a silent conversation of promises whispered against each other's skin. His arms wrapped tightly around her, lifting her slightly off her feet, as if to confirm that this was real, that they were finally here. The air around them thrummed with a tangible energy, a blend of relief, elation, and the profound weight of a shared future. In that moment, surrounded by the soft glow of candles and the lingering scent of roses, their London flat felt less like a haven and more like the very beginning of their forever.
Nothing could top this night. Harry was performing like never before and the crowd was living for it. His energy was palpable, it could be felt throughout the room. All the way to the vibrations of the overwhelming instruments that were roaring the music to life.Ā
He was mid-verse, bathed in the spotlight, when a ripple went through the crew backstage. A stagehand, usually invisible in the periphery, stepped forward hesitantly. Harry, ever the professional, subtly acknowledged the interruption with a raised eyebrow, continuing to sing as the stagehand approached and respectfully handed him a small, plain white card. It wasn't uncommon for requests or fan letters to make their way to him, but this felt different. There was an urgency in the stagehand's eyes, a knowing glint that piqued his curiosity.
He finished the chorus, letting the crowd take over the bridge. This was his moment. He unfolded the card, expecting maybe a quirky drawing or a heartfelt message from a fan. But what he saw made the world tilt on its axis.
It was a small, grainy image, unmistakably an ultrasound. A tiny, blurry shape, barely more than a speck, was visible within a sac. His heart pounded, a frantic rhythm against his ribs. Below the image, in Y/Nās elegant script, were just five words:
"Two hearts in one home."
A reference to a song off his first album. That night, he had proposed to her thinking there was no way in the world that the night could possibly get any better. But this? This was the woman he had planned to spend the rest of his lift with. To cherish. And hearing this new only made him so much more happier to call her his.Ā
The mic felt heavy in his hand, his voice catching in his throat. The crowd, sensing a shift, quieted slightly, their collective gaze fixed on him. His eyes burned, a mixture of disbelief and overwhelming joy welling up. He looked out at the sea of faces, then back at the tiny, perfect image on the card. A family. Their family. This wasn't just a proposal; it was a revelation, a double helix of destiny intertwining their lives even further.
A wide, uncontrollable grin spread across his face, his eyes shining. He lifted the card for the crowd to see, though he knew they wouldn't understand. But Y/N, watching from a hidden perch backstage, would. He brought the microphone to his lips, his voice thick with emotion.
"Wembly," he began, his voice a little shaky but full of newfound warmth. "Tonight has been... extraordinary." He paused, looking directly towards the back of the stage where he knew she was. "Just a few hours ago, the most incredible person in the world agreed to be my wife."
A collective gasp, then an explosion of cheers, rippled through the arena. Harry chuckled, a sound of pure happiness.
Although their relationship was not private, it was also not public. The world knew Harry and Y/N. Harry made it a point to hard launch their relationship. He didnāt want to sneak around or try and plan a fully private life again. Harry wanted to be able to go out and enjoy his time with Y/N without caring who saw what or who was taking which picture.
They still kept it private though. The ins and outs of their relationship had always been that: theirs.Ā
Harry felt a deep, abiding sense of good fortune. His fans, a fiercely loyal and protective bunch, had always embraced Y/N with open arms, a fact that still struck him with a pleasant surprise. Heād seen the countless edits, the intricate fan art, the online debates that raged for hours, where complete strangers passionately defended their relationship against any detractors. It was a rare and beautiful thing, this collective acceptance, this outpouring of genuine affection for someone he loved so dearly. He remembered the early days, when the initial reactions had been a nervous anticipation, a fear of the unknown. But almost immediately, the warmth had begun to pour in, a steady stream of support that had only grown stronger with time. They weren't just fans; they were an extension of his chosen family, celebrating his joy as if it were their own, seeing Y/N not as an intrusion, but as an essential part of his happiness. This unwavering devotion, this willingness to fight for their contentment, made him feel lucky all around, a profound gratitude swelling within him each time he witnessed it.
"And now," he continued, holding up the ultrasound card, "she's given me another gift. A gift that means our home will have another heart in it very soon."
The crowd erupted again, this time with a confused but joyous roar. Some understood immediately, tears welling up in their eyes. Others exchanged bewildered glances, but the sheer emotion radiating from Harry was infectious. He pressed a hand to his chest, feeling the thumpĀ now. It was loud and coursing through his body like never before.Ā
"We're having a baby!" he shouted, his voice cracking with emotion. The arena exploded. Cheers, screams, applause, a symphony of shared delight. He bowed his head, tears finally escaping, rolling down his cheeks. Then? He slowly sunk into the floor. Landing on his knees as he placed his head in his hands. His body was shaking as he cried. Tears of joy poured from him at the thought of all of his dreams coming true.
Really. He had met the girl of his dreams, their relationship had been easy and simple. A pure love he never thought he would ever be able to experience. His career was also at an all time high. He was gaining new titles left and right, but he might have just received his favorite of all.Ā He looked up, his gaze finding Y/N's. She was beaming, her face wet with tears of her own, a hand pressed to her lips.
He could have stopped the show. He thought about it, even if it was only for a brief moment. Could he be blamed though? He could have called it a night, brought her out on stage and kissed her passionately on the stage for the world to see. Just so everyone knew just how extremely excited he was for this. For them. To finally have a future he had thought so fondly of.Ā
He blew her a kiss, a silent promise not just of forever, but of a future filled with lullabies and laughter, tiny shoes and unconditional love. The music swelled, picking up where it left off, but for Harry, the song had changed. It was no longer just about love lost or found, but about love expanding, encompassing a whole new life, a whole new adventure. He was engaged, he was going to be a father, and he was the happiest man alive. The concert, the lights, the roar of the crowd ā it all faded into the background, replaced by the quiet, profound joy of a heart finally, completely, at home.
After the final encore, the roar of the crowd still echoing in his ears, Harry practically sprinted backstage. He found Y/N waiting, her arms already open. Their embrace was fierce, silent, and filled with everything they couldn't express in front of thousands. Tears streamed down both their faces, a mixture of adrenaline, relief, and profound happiness.
Later, in the quiet luxury of their hotel suite, a small, impromptu celebration unfolded. It wasn't the wild party one might expect after a stadium show; instead, it was intimate, profound. Road managers and a few close friends had arranged for a spread of their favorite comfort foods: a simple, perfectly cooked pasta dish, a bottle of fine red wine, and a ridiculously oversized, slightly lopsided cake that someone had managed to get delivered, emblazoned with "Congratulations!" in shaky icing.
They sat close, talking in hushed tones, rehashing every moment of the night. Harry kept reaching for Y/Nās hand, tracing circles on her engagement ring, then gently covering her stomach, a silent acknowledgment of the tiny life growing within. The ultrasound picture lay on the coffee table, illuminated by the soft glow of the lamps, becoming the new centerpiece of their world. There were toasts, quiet laughter, and moments of comfortable silence where the sheer magnitude of their happiness filled the room. It was a celebration not of fame or success, but of family, of dreams realized, and of two hearts, truly, becoming one home.
If can obviously take the best and safest route for not only your mental health but physical health! Iām always here for you if you need someone-š¦
thank you lovely i appreciate it so much, truly <3
my boyfriend is older and already has children, but weāve discussed this lightly beforehand still early on into the relationship to see if weād have a compatible future together. he luckily still wants a child in the future, as do i, but the keyword there is future.
iāll need to look into my options for my state, but iāll need to talk to him as well because no matter what, he has a right to know. iām just so nervous. itās weird. iām not sure what to do š¬ i canāt have someone answer it for me but honestly all i really know what to say over it is: i donāt know how to move forward lol
i donāt know how i feel. i was told today that iām pregnant but the labs show itās most likely still very early. itās a weird feeling. iām unsure how to navigate it
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so⦠iām pregnant. i was told that they canāt give me an exact estimate on how far along until i set up appointments, but the HCG level from the labs is not super high, so i was told itās probably fairly early. i sort of zoned out after they told me it did come back positive. iām just at a blank rn yall
okay hey gorgeous.
I know this can be really difficult time right now- so I want you to know that you are so so loved and it will all be okay I promise you.
Iām sending lots of hugs rn
thank you honeybug <3 i appreciate the support soso much iām so grateful for everyone on here