jerryscorpse

I love the thought of Jerry and Summer being super close when she was younger - as stated in the show

Also gave Jerry a bit of a mullet, because I feel like he would have tried having one before getting too self-conscious about it and cutting his hair short again

*smacks you in the face with another Benson Dunwoody appreciation post*

HI HO, THE GUMBALL CAN STAY. 

Here’s a post for all you Bensimps! <3

Morty: But, we don't want to go.

Jerry: Fine. Forced family fun.

Summer: You're dragging us into the woods against our will. That's kidnapping.

Right? Yeah? Okay.

Morty: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated. Rick: Killed without hesitation. Morty: No-

Morty: Wh- R-Rick! I- I can explain. Rick: Can you? Morty: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie!

Beth: Go to Hell! Jerry, tearing up while thinking of his demon ‘friends’: I wish I could..

Jerry: Beth and I don’t use pet names, I swear! Rick: I see. Hey, what do bees make? Jerry: Honey? Beth: Yes, dear? Jerry: Rick: Don’t ever lie to my face again.

Jerry: Fitness tip! Never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness. Summer: Next time you’re working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice. Burn your ex’s house down. You can do it. I believe in you. Morty: There were so many mixed messages in that I can’t-

*Summer and Morty sitting in jail together after stealing something from Rick* Summer: Who are we going to call? Morty: I’d call Rick, but I feel safer in jail.

ricks wife or smthn idk: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon? Rick: I’m a knife. Bird Person, from across the room: He’s the little spoon.

Jerry, driving Morty and Summer: So how was your day? Morty: We almost got surprise adopted! Jerry: What? Summer: Oh, we almost got kidnapped. Jerry: Cool! Jerry: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!\

Beth: You lying, cheating, piece of shit! Jerry: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! Beth: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING THE KIDS WITH ME! Rick, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

*Summer mixing a drink* Beth: Any chance that’s for me? Summer: It’s for Rick. I’m planning on making some bad choices tonight, and I need him on my side. Morty: Oh geez, I never realized the forethought that went into b-being a disappointment.

Lizard Morty: What did you guys get in your yearbook? c137 Morty: ‘Prettiest Smile’ Fat/Left Handed Morty: 'Nicest Personality’ Cowboy Morty: 'Most likely to start a bar fight’ Evil/President Morty: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one’

Doofus Jerry: I activate Chewbacca, you assclown!

Jerry: Rich boy!

Doofus Jerry: Hecker-wuss!

Jerry: Money-bags!

Doofus Jerry: Idiot with brown hair!

Jerry: I hate you!