4/3/16

You’re allowed to cry. It mattered. It wouldn’t hurt this much if it didn’t matter.

I just closed up. I was so used to being open with you that I didn’t even realize I was shutting you out, that for once it wasn’t just you doing it to me. But I was also used to being hurt by you every time I did let you in; maybe not immediately, or even after a few days, but eventually you just put up your walls again and I got tired of being the only one willing to bare my soul and take a risk on something that I believed in. But I think the sad thing is that even though I realize all of this, even though I know exactly how this is going to end, I’m going to keep trying because I still believe in it; and for that I can only blame myself.