Give A Little Whistle

I hid under a stairwell until the cops found me. I think the guy passed me but he wouldn’t have known I was there. I guess being short and small has its perks.  

Jesus... Well that makes my mind rest easy... I'm glad you're okay, honey. Seriously. You should have seen me, I'm pretty sure I was crying so hard that I almost passed out. Definitely not my strongest moment. 

You know it. Hey, trying is the first step, and that’s all anyone can ask for. Short version- I went back home to Hawai’i for a few months, came back, was in the shooting, and I’ve been pretty much antisocial ever since. And that’s what you’ve missed at WDH. 

Oh god you were in it?! Holy shit are you okay? I was in my dorm when it  happened and I heard the gunfire and freaked out and I was terrified cause I knew people were still out there... I knew Cody was still out there... God are you okay? What happened?

Yes…yeah. Most everything’s fine. I st-started university, moved in with Koby to an apartment off campus…been t-taking care of Allen’s n-niece since the shooting…yeah, just tr-trying to get back to a sense of normalcy. Y’know? Me and T-Tevin are planning music for a m-memorial service…for Jack and the o-others. Chris c-came back..but I don’t q-quite know what we are…Allen h-hates gay people so i can’t even t-talk to him about Chris….but mostly it’s m-music school stuff. I’ve been doing ‘Nearer My God T-To Thee’ for my f-first jury.

That's good man, good for you. I can't wait to hear it. I bet it's going to be amazing. And I'm sorry about Chris... I know that's still partially my fault and all... I'm sure he'll eventually come around though, if he really does care about you as much as I know he does. I mean, Cody came around to me... for some reason. It'll all work out, bro, I'm sure of it. And hey, if you can't talk to Allen about it, you can talk to me, now that I'm actually around, heh. You know I'll always be here for ya if you need me. I'm sorry I haven't been recently though just... a lot of shit ya know?

Welcome to what my life has been for the past five years, JC. Have a seat with the rest of us. 

Awesome. I guess we can be a club now... But I'm trying I guess... How're things with you? Whatcha been up to?

-sighs- Basically I've become a lazy bum. But whatever it doesn't matter now because I'm going to get off my ass and actually do something.... Forget it it's not important. How have you been, bro? Doing okay? Everything good? Man I'm a shitty friend... 

I’m failing to see the bad? If you’re doing your work, why is not going to them a bad thing?

Because... um... I feel like a bad person? I don't know... I guess I just feel bad for skipping and not telling Cody... He thinks I go to class every day when he leaves and I just sit in my room... I've been doing it so I can figure out what the hell I want to do with my life so I can just sit somewhere and focus but I just feel like a bad person. 

Kay. My l-lips are sealed.

Okay um... -takes a deep breath- I'vebeenskippingclasssincebeforetheshootingcauseIneededtotakesometimeofftofigureoutwhathehellIwanttodowithmylifeandIthinkIfinallyfounditbutCodycant'findoutbecausehewouldbesomadatme...

Well… all of us have. The high school had a shooting. It’s been all over the news. Have you been under a rock, man?

No no no I know about that. Of course I did, Cody's been hiding out in my room for weeks now. I meant like... I've been doing it since before that even happened. But I've been doing my homework online and everything and I still have decent grades in all my classes I just haven't... gone to any of them... 

I've been uh... well...  Listen, if I tell you you have to promise me not to tell Cody. Please. He can't find out. 

Sure. I’ve been antisocial, so I don’t think that’s a problem. 

I um... I've kinda been... skipping class lately. Like a lot. A lot a lot. 

Well… this conversation just got awkward. 

Yeah sorry... I uh... listen if I told you a secret would you just... not tell anyone? Please? 

Doing fine. Just been, y’know, hanging out. How about you?

Good, good... ya know... just... hanging out and stuff... 

Look who lives. 

Heyyyy Lila... How... how are you?