Maria

Let’s fucking go

love island should introduce a "scheming eunuch" islander who is like a smart and completely asexual islander exempt from being kicked off or being made to participate in any challenges and they're just there to provide advice and be a sort of sounding board for the other islanders when they need a disinterested party to talk things through with. but the scheming eunuch has secret goals unbeknownst to anyone e.g. a cash prize for talking a certain couple into breaking up etc.

HATE when u can feel ur intestines writhing. cease your wriggling insolent belly worm

WHEN do you ever feel that

the worms yearn for escape

The worms are telling you to go see a doctor...

@entities-of-posts the corruption/flesh?

awwww, they were exploring their new enclosure 😍😍😍

today I found out my mother doesn’t know what dandelions are and now I’m wondering what other strange secrets she’s been quietly harboring

Where do you live that you don’t have dandelions?

we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation

See, folks in the southern US will tell you up and down those are buttercups, actually.

Wait I thought those bigger cup ones were Easter Lillies???

They’re marigolds and I know a bitch when I see one!

….we need to start taking the phrase “go touch grass” more literally. go outside and examine a flower i beg u

*squints* is that a motherfucking EVENING PRIMROSE?!??

*Puts hand over gaud’s mouth* It’s a butterfly pea. Please ignore the Latin name.

no piece of supernatural commentary will ever be as impactful as ‘what happened to all the pussy on supernatural’

plutonic lesbian friends (that do nothing for me)

june is over... goodbye pride month, hello disability pride month!!

let's all be disabled this month... together 🤝

if you're not disabled yet: no need to worry! i can help. come closer.