Trees Please

points about this -it was shot off by a cannon -he continued being a knight for over 40 years after getting the iron hand -it was delicate enough he could still write with a quill using it, which is important as he was described as a ‘warrior poet’ -after a merchant-punching life suitable for an elder scrolls protagonist he was outlawed by the holy roman empire, friends of his used a high diplomacy roll and a bribe to get him out, and he then almost immediately kidnapped a bishop -after outlaw of the holy roman empire 2 electric boogaloo was placed under house arrest in a castle he had purchased with all his quest rewards to spend the next 20 years drunk off his ass

I can’t believe you’d make this post and not mention that his poetry contains the first known usage of the phrase “lick my ass”

A quick google says there’s a german movie about his life but I can’t seem to find a link/download and I NEED THIS LIKE AIR.

Says he lost his right arm and the picture is a left hand which just leads me to believe this post is shit

*poses with my leg out* white people being “”real”” is just white people being disgustingly rude and cruel and entitled. i’m sick of seeing it all around me.

There's no cure either real white people are everywhere nowdays