reality behind appearance.,

"Sana sa nxt time mgng ok na" -poging chix daw

HAHA. That guy who will never ever ever <assuming lang ako sa part na to>became my bestfriend. kung bakit? It was never meant to be maybe. :> alam mo yung parehong reason lang pero not at the same time. that statement above was texted to me and I was like, 

"Bakit nga ba hindi kame magtago ng mas maaga?" with a deep sigh. tsss.

Everything seems so right. Everything seems so cool and in place. But the planet seems to be rotating so fast. In a sudden this FEELING entered my body and every organ of it. I don't know how to TERM this feeling. It's so sudden. But why does it stayed in me for days now. >.<

"ALAM MO YUN DI KO ALAM KUNG KASAMA BA SA pAGTANDA KO YUNG GANITONG FEELING!" -me to a friend

Masaya naman ako. All of a sudden I don't know what REAL HAppiness means. Maybe this feeling will just leave me in a sudden as it did always.

I am counting the words that completed the thought that hurt me at that simple moment.. Maybe as other unexpected things that happened, it was just meant to happen. The only thing is that it hurt me, continue hurting me.

Everything happened as fast as the days quickly passing by. I don't know! Maybe ,NO! IT WAS A SIMPLE JOKE.. it's just pag nanggaling sa isang pinahalagahan mo ng bongga, those word just simply become hurtful.

A poem for Ava

  I don’t know how,

Fvckin’ creativity goes lower than low

Photoshop or any video editing?

No skills for that stuffs and things!

  Damn! Why is this so hard?

It’s only a greeting wanted to be said.

How will I start? Hmmm..

Okay! Listen! Coz baby, this is from the heart!

  I miss you

But I don’t know what to do

Between me and you,

There are gaps too.

  My mind goes upside down

For reasons I can’t tell you why

Sometimes at your face I frowned

Yet in turn all I get is a smile

  All I know is I’m sorry

And I’m so lucky

To have you as my friend

Even I am the worst in the line.

  Stay!

That’s what I want you to know on your day.

You are one of the ladies

The Radio God and the Radio character. They were the two people who unintentionally changed some of my perspectives in life. Observing them in their own world was the best way for us to learn from them. Being with them for more than a month was never a boring time.

Every night they make a segment about a particular topic. Oh geez! It doesn’t just make me laugh but it do make me learn. J Their personality made it easy for us to adapt the surroundings there. There was no pressure. Flaws are faced by loud laughter. The ambiance inside the booth was so light. A simple thing will be returned by the sincerest “thank you”. You won’t even feel like an alien there inside. It seems that you are included in the conversation. Paulit-ulit lang to. But there; this is what I had experienced during my OJT in the Disenchated Kingdom with King Dj Logan and Dj Marf.

I may not be able to express all of this in person but I realized I still can express it. It may sound emotional or drama thing yet I’d still love to do this. J

Hmm. let’s make it sound more creative. So here it goes baby!

  There was this kingdom

Where I luckily roamed.

I spent a month with them

A duo better than a team.

  I used to hate “sweetheart”

It doesn’t suits me; a jaguar!

But now to my ear,

It sounds cool; wonderful as an art!

  From you, I learned

From you, I became better

Someday if I conquer,

It’s you I’ll remember.

  Thank you Sir!

For being with me this semester.

Thank you Sir!

For a lot of things I will remember.

  9th of August 2012. A day to celebrate. A day to let someone special and one of my closest friends as well, feel that she is indeed a blessing to me. She may not be the nicest in the four edges of our classroom but she is definitely one of nice person there. She is a little girl with a lot of fears in her body. Yet she has one of the biggest hearts among us. She is a bully sometimes, I mean most of the times. I thought I am the only “small but terrible” in the world but I realized that she deserve it more than I do. She may hurt others through her little punches using her small little arms; but she is a very kind, loving friend.

There were lots of times I pushed her away from me. I have my reasons. I don’t want her to have my own way of friendship. I won’t let her experience gaps with other friends like I did. J It’s not that I don’t believe in what she can do but I believe that I can’t make her happy the way others can. I don’t want her to be me. I know she deserve more than the friendship I can give. Well, this is so dramatic. Fvck! J At the end of the day, I want to say sorry for pushing you away sometimes. It’s just because I want the best for you and being with me is not the best for you. Hmm. I hope you understand.

I wish I could be the best friend as what you are to me. I want to be. You’re a sister to me no matter what happen. I can’t be with you all the time because of some reasons. I may be the worst friend but you have never let me down. I hate you for that!

  You are so stupid to choose staying with me. But you don’t know how much I appreciate that fact.

 I know I am a closed door whenever I am sad and just let you worry. But still you stayed even sometimes you are so irritating. But I understand. Thank you for being there Mare. Thank you! You are so one of a kind. I hoped I can be your best friend but let’s stay as sisters because most of the time it is my best friend whom I always hurt at the end.

I have a song for you. It is entitled “At the Beginning”. J I can’t sing it but just remember that song will be our friendship song. When you need someone, just think and sing the song so you will remember the beautiful me! <3 we have so many things shared to each other through the years. The end is near. I can’t say that we will still be the same after graduation but as I always say our friendship with its memories will lasts forever here in my heart.

You are now really a lady. More matured, strong and brave. Don’t stop being strong. Continue to widen your life and growing (of course not in terms of height). J Continue depending on yourself, Don’t forget this, even if they don’t believe you can, I am behind you, pushing you to your limits. Simply because I know you can.

Before enrolling the first semester in my last year of college, I really had no clue of where would I be trained. I wanted to apply to DZMM. I preferred to be in AM station before. It was the lacking of time that pushed me to apply to a FM station. Luckily, I was with one of my closest friend and a friend whom I usually bullied. Haha! I was partnered with that thin curled-hair, bullied friend of mine.

We had so many memories in that workplace. That cool place. Literally and more deep in meaning. I myself could say that the on-the-job-training I experienced there and the two hundred hours I spent there really made me satisfied and happy. That statement was none of a joke or a “biased thing”. That was my point of view and what my mind and heart thinks and feels.

Paper works. Editing. Cooking. Typing. Monitoring. Once in a lifetime being in front of the console; but it excludes the commercial and I didn’t talked there. And the “top 1” thing that I used to do every night: assisting inside the DJ’s booth. That was the coolest part of my OJT.

Yes! Maybe if my experience would be compared to some of my classmates’ OJT, they practiced a lot more than I do on my OJT. But guess what; I just realized that we already learned what they are practicing so they couldn’t tell me that I learned less than they did. I suddenly remember what Sir Marky told us, “No books can fully explain how to be a successful media practitioner”. Practically, yes! “ibang-iba ang pinag-aaralan niyo sa totoong mundo ng Media”. Definitely true! My OJT may not be a pure practice but it doesn’t end there, my OJT was just another type of learning. Observing. Opening my eyes to the real world of media as those real media people live with it. Then, finally learn from it!