Hoshi to Hane, music box mix edition.
Peter Solarz
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

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Hoshi to Hane, music box mix edition.

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"Bow your heads, and do not look at him."
"Do not even dare to imagine him."
Him:
These introductions.
đ This is why I love Tower of God
Rurutia is back with another single...
It's something between "I Keep on Lovin' You" and "Yui", though I find the swing rhythm catchier this time around.
This one comes with an video on the official channel.
RURUTIA--Deeply (Music Box Remix)
I haven't been very productive lately, so here's a little something...
I didn't attempt the exact feel of the original, so I don't consider it complete, but it's mostly what I wanted.
The ending of Attack on Titan: a shallow analysis
(I don't think I should have to put a spoilers alert on a blog about the ENDING OF AOT, but in general if you mind being spoiled on a series, I advise you to refrain from attending discussions about the body of work until you've finished it in its entirety/come up to speed on the current chapter/episode. Screw hype dude, do you like being hurt? Also for the TLDR, itâs that Attack on Titan explores the cycle of hatred (Erenâs journey) AND love which is why Mikasa and Ymir become relevant at the end of the story.)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PREFACE
Since the newly added panels of AOTâs ending have been likened by some to the ending of Naruto, I'd like to say that Naruto's end truly hurt me; the way it flows into Boruto is so contrived it burns. A story that's always centered around powerful ninja bloodlines fighting political wars suddenly introduced aliens that harvest planets for energy as the super antagonist, and additionally they're the source of all our characters' powers as well as the jinchuriki and tailed beasts themselves. Then when you look at the plot of Boruto which heavily relies on the Otsutsuki clan as an antagonistic force, their whole existence feels like the transition from Dragon Ball straight into the first DBZ arc with Goku learning heâs really part of an alien race that was meant to destroy Earth.
I didn't detect so forced a role in the ending of AOT, but it's absolutely plausible to speculate that the alternate ending was influenced for this reason, as we know Attack on Titan wasn't produced through Isayama's involvement alone. Certain compromises are made when operating as a team, though it would be wonderful if the original intent of authors were more absolute in the world of production than they are known to be.
And as much as I don't enjoy half-hearted continuations of series for a royalty check, I ALMOST can't blame them for doing it...it creates (many) happy fans, more jobs, and Isayama gets his royalty check. The rest of us suffer but hey, artists need money I guess... đĽ Moving on. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
#1. Eren's development as a character
I never saw Eren's goal steered in the direction of breaking the cycle of revenge or hatred. He was acting wholly in his own interests. He's intensely selfish, doesn't want to change his views, and exists in the story to further the cycle itself. According to me, Chapters 129 and 131 perfectly explain his motivations for the rumbling.
Now before I go on, I'd like to bring a particular scene to mind. I do remember him saying this once (to Historia who had just told him killing the rest of the world is unjustifiable and wrong):
Yes, he said that, but I don't think that is what he ever intended the rumbling to be used for.
After he stated that 80% of humanity was wiped out so Paradis will be safe for the time being, he neglected to answer Armin's questions in 139: "Did you really need to go that far? Are you sure you did all of this for our sakes?" We may also consider the thoughts he chose NOT to share in chapter 131:
That combined with this excerpt from 129 is pretty much all there is to Eren's convictions.
Those are the same words he said in Chapter 2 after his mother died.
So despite his brief period of self-loathing when considering 1) the countless lives in survey corps sacrificed for his sake, 2) being confronted with his and his father's involvement in the Reiss family, 3) everything he learned about his enemy--that all titans are formerly human, that the titan shifters were just children deceived by their world--he even admits to Reiner during Tyburn's speech (Chapter 100) that they are indeed in the same boat--and on top of that, admitting that the rumbling will do nothing to fix the course of history, he settled with the same conviction he held the moment he decided to do something to change the world.
Again, here's his words from 139 showing us just how angry a boi Eren was.
This was Eren Jaeger...he didn't even really know what he was doing.
As a human being, Eren was very much in the cycle of revenge as much as everyone else was. His course of action never deviated too far from that path. He knew better, but he lashed out at the world to protect the few people he cared about anyway. He took freedom away from the ones who threatened him. He was a mass murderer, and so were the other soldiers in this series fighting for their own reasons, since titans were people. Survey corps were always slaughtering these people whom they saw as monsters. Marley viewed Eldians as monstrously and with as much hatred as Eldians viewed the titans. Eren did not try to justify his actions to everyone. He simply stopped seeing the value of life in others not important to him, as humans often do.
So what did he sacrifice 80% of humanity for? From 129 again:
Them meaning his immediate friends.
No, he didn't care about their children's children and beyond because there's no way to control what happens when you're gone from this world. It wasn't his problem. Eren had 4 years at most left to live, and he wanted to do what he could to ensure his friends were happy before he left.
And as jarring as it was to see Eren become undone in the last chapter, I didn't find it completely out of character, because for one he was talking to his closest friend moments before his own death, and secondly, Eren was just a stupid human like the rest of the people in this series. Obviously, most people just want a normal life that they can spend with people whom they love. Eren was the same way, but was denied that future (and happened to be able to do something about it). Very selfish goals, but those chosen few were his world. Along with a general distaste for humanity, that's how I understand his character motivations.
*Which is to say in relation to the extra pages, Ymir's curse returning a generation or two after the events of AOT doesn't entirely void his actions. Iâm assuming the power of Ymir apparently exists as a force of nature on this version of Earth period, so I suppose this points us to an endless cycle of humans eventually finding the power and using it as they see fit *
#2 Why is Romance Relevant to Attack on Titan?
I wasn't expecting a romance factor to be relevant at the end of the story, however considering that Mikasa's affection for Eren WAS her most prominent personality trait as a character, then the events that followed, I was forced to look back to a few moments in the series that could lend light to why, in the end, a romantic subplot ended the curse of Ymir. My conclusions are as follows:
1. Quite literally, the cycle of hatred never ends. Humans will always have a reason to be unkind to one another. We are animals after all; this trait cannot be reasoned through with logic, bred out, or defeated. We are a self-aware species (Eren's even aware of his own hypocrisy in Chapter 131). There will always arise those who take what they want for themselves because they decide in the end they don't care about others as much as they care about their own interests.
2. To make this second point, I'm stealing these words out of a certain machine lifeform's mouth, but bear with me here:
"But the humans...? Now THEY are interesting. Because they are an enigma! They killed uncountable numbers of their own kind, yet loved in equal measure! It's fascinating, don't you think? What could possibly drive such behavior? We have dedicated ourselves to unraveling this riddle of humanity..."
--Adam from NieR:Automata
AOT uses Eren and Mikasa as a case study of humanity. Humans hate and love in equal measure.
In Ch. 129, Zeke's piece here foreshadows the significance of those two for the story, I guess?
Now everyone reading this series as well as the characters in it had noticed how much fondness Mikasa always had for Eren, and how aloof he always was towards her in return...that's something for them to work out.
Despite never really reciprocating Mikasa's feelings, Eren told Armin at the end of the series that yes, he enjoyed receiving her attention; he would have liked to live a happy life with her. So, Mikasa just liked Eren, Eren liked her... And similar to Mikasa, Ymir just liked King Fritz. It doesn't matter whether we think these feelings were sound or not; they did what they wanted with themselves. I suppose that explains the reason she was a mega simp for Eren in the whole story. Yes, this turn in the story reads like a different plot now, not one about war and killing monsters, but I'm pleasantly surprised that this trait taken as a flaw of Mikasaâs actually served as a necessary condition to end the conflict of the titans.
Eren wouldn't let go of his hatred of the world for his own satisfaction, Ymir wouldn't let go of her love of King Fritz for her own satisfaction, and Mikasa is the only one who decided to let go of her convictions in the interest of someone other than herself. That's what moved the curse.
I think Isayama used the characters of Ymir and Mikasa to demonstrate that while there is a cycle of hatred and revenge running rampant in humanity, the cycle of love doesn't stop either.
In closing, and I truly apologize for such a lengthy post; I hope I didnât reiterate my point too often here...I didn't think about any of this until I heard so many readers upset with the way AOT ended. I'm not personally left with any disappointment in where the story went. I didn't know where it was going to go in the first place, and I think it could have been much worse for us in different hands.Â
*shrugs*
AOT is a story about the nature of humanity.
*And in regards to Jean, if that is supposed to be him with Mikasa in the new panels, all I can say is dude likes his girl. He was a simp for her and she was a simp for Eren, but the fact that they shared their lives together means a lot even if Eren was never completely buried in her heart. He meant a lot to her man, idk...

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Rurutia in the morning, Rurutia in the afternoon, Rurutia in the evening. She's been delivering for a long time, and she's not for everyone. But she certainly is for me.
When speaking of my favorite Rurutia songs, it's difficult to rank them in terms of all time fondness. (However, for new listeners I am more likely to recommend entries from Promised Land, Meme, and Seirios)
It's more that different songs speak to me at different times across months and years.
For instance, I made the Shiki music box mix because at that time in my life the song was on my mind a lot. It was almost a meditation, really.
Before that, Aoi Bara used to hit me good. đ
When I was very young the chorus of Tsuki Senichiya was important. I can't describe it as "getting chills", since that's the surface of your skin reacting to the music. It was more that my spine itself was being tickled internally. đ
--I'm not trying to sound too weird here, so anyways--
There was a time (after making the Shiki music box mix) when Parade touched me very deeply too. The message of that song and the delivery... The piano and strings in chorus really spoke to me a few years ago during that time.
For the last year or so there has been a nice little group. Giselle/Jizeru, Sanctuary, Hoshi to Hane (hence the 8 bit), Deeply, and now Hyousa is coming back around.
I'm sure there's a reason for these things...
My first "important" song was Lost Butterfly, because that's what drew me in to her discography. It took many years--I'd say 5 or so--to casually digest everything up to her most recent album (I believe it was Hyousa at the time; I was "there" when Behind the Blue came out). So I've been a "live" fan since then, waiting for news but mainly appreciating prior works.
Also, as a note...many of her auto generated albums have vanished on my YouTube. So there's no more Chorion, Seirios, Node from R I can casually bring up in a library there-- actually I don't think that one ever auto generated. While her career is certainly long lived and successful, I pray that more adaptations use her music in the future.
We have a new moon today.
(and a new video)
đ
Finally did another video. Attempting two a month if possible. Please pray for me đ
https://youtu.be/gw2I8PnXCxQ
As I re-watch the Tower of God anime (and will soon inevitably read the webtoon for the 3rd or 4th time), I'm reminded of the feelings I have as I travel together with Bam. We've met all these people who become associates and friends, and then we have to part ways, always, always.
That's it. That's the TLDR gist.
But for the longer post: -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From one floor test to another, there's not always a guarantee that we will make it out together.
Sometimes I go ahead and wait for you, or it's the other way around.
We lose touch for several years at a time. We like each other but we can't be together at all times. That is sweet and sad. Hoping the people you like are coming closer to happiness and prosperity.
This is the shit I don't think about a lot but this is what life is.
This journey of Tower of God reminds me of having friends myself. It's an honor to hang with people who are not like me, whom I don't truly understand, but I appreciate them and some of the things they bring to my attention. They all make me happy in different ways, thus I want to be with them when I can, and protect them, and get through life together. We are not granted this future together, however.
Climbing the tower together is...our dream.
Circumstances tear us away from one another and I can only wonder about some people Iâve grown to love, cloaking them in a small prayer, an expectant gesture that they are well. Then if we ever reunite, it's back to a sweetness and I hope for more good times to come. If we never meet again, I'm still happy I met you.
That's the feeling I get when I follow these characters. It's been such a long journey that is not nearly over... I hope everyone is okay and would like to see them again, but we probably wonât.
It's not quite the "memories" that are precious to me. I'm terrible about specific memories. In the span of 4-5 years I probably only have a handful of things I can say about anything at all.
When it comes to friends and sunshine, it's about having felt it in my heart and on my face at a time.
In high school I had a few guys in a human anatomy class that I would laugh so much with. I was so amused by whatever we would discuss I was crying in laughter all the time (while trying to be discreet and not get the table in trouble). My heart was so merry with that bunch, but too bad I have no idea what the hell was so funny! It's a complete blank. I sort of wish I remembered, but honestly all I can feel is gratitude that I experienced that period of time at all. It was a fucking treat. I sort of remember our personalities, and it's not that we were all on the same page either. It's all pure art that I've forgotten all about except for the fun feeling. I'll never get that back nor those people, and I don't want any of it back. I just hope everybody is okay now, or getting there. I'm just glad it happened.
I've had more cordial acquaintances that made me happy even though I never told them how much I liked them, and I think about them from time to time. There are so many awesome people in this world. I won't remember everybody but I am glad I met them. They really made the journey easier.
I feel dramatic for writing all of this...
But this is how watching Bam's climb up the tower feels to me. This is about the only phenomenon from a show I've ever been able to relate directly to myself. I donât typically think or feel like any of the characters from all the series I love. I also don't want to or need to see myself represented to enjoy any story. However, arc after arc Bam meets cool people and then they're gone. And you just keep moving. You kinda hope they're OK, maybe they're dead, but if not, cool. Just a few days ago I asked myself âDoes TOG introduce too many interesting people per arc and then drop them just because theyâre not in MCâs crew?â But actually, no. That's how my life's been too. So I guess for once, I'm personally touched. Thank you SIU. Thank you Bam. And everyone that stands by him for his soul and not an ideal such as what he might bring for for you.
PSA: PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
Iâm going to post some âqualityâ content soon, but in the meantime do you remember how h0t Casano was? Is my boy ever going to show up again or is Horyang going to be left in a coma forever dude? *looked at the wiki apparently he woke up already; faintly remembers glasses girl crying...in relief, was it? Was this around the part where Yeon/Rak also fell off the bridge when Yuri was fighting Karaka and Bam was upset or... * ... Yeah itâs time to reread this for the 4th or 5th time now.Â
Point is, him a pretty boy. Approaching levels of Yusuke Kitagawa here. Dangerous levels of swo0ping into my heart hehe

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They've become monsters đ
You haven't seen my begonias in a while.
These are the children of the ones I used to post. I left the others in the care of my father. I haven't asked about their wellbeing...
RURUTIA--DEEPLY
I'm such a naughty fan... I failed to mention the debut of a new single yesterday Match 6th.
https://youtu.be/35dJCkQlxHU
Le details are contained within tweets that I can't copy and paste into Google translate.
Ugh...if I learnded Japanese years ago this wouldn't be a problem. But then I'd actually UNDERSTAND what I'm hearing which would be the end of my innocence.
Anyway, link to her twitter:
RURUTIA ĺ Źĺź (@RURUTIA_Planet): https://twitter.com/RURUTIA_Planet?s=09
It's a digital single! So you can buy it eeeeeverywhere.
Tower of God Anime: (Not) Brief Commentary
Hello all.
I'd like to discuss the few things I've gleaned about the Tower of God anime adaptation.
I was a bit afraid before it came out and disappointed with episode 1, but I'm not upset with the developments by any means. Itâs a good series so new watchers will certainly enjoy themselves for Season 1. Letâs dive into the opinions.
1. Art style. Everyone looks beautiful to my eyes and the colors and shading is similar to the style it started out in. I'm pleased with how beautiful everyone looks, especially sister Yuri.
2. Opening/Ending:Â
So the opening is âTOPâ (Japanese ver.) Stray Kidsâ and the ending is âSLUMPâ (Japanese ver.) from the same group.
The cinematic is not what I would expect for demonstrating what we can expect from the show. It's Baam like...falling down, getting rained on, distressed, tormented, glass falling... AMV material for sure, but I am not exactly pleased with it when thinking about a viewer's first impression of the show. It puts me in a strange mood. I donât like it. A more stereotypical showing-main-characterâs-faces-without-giving-away-too-much kind of intro would be better.
*coughs*
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HU_Z8RKo_Ow
Once I heard the music start, I sat through the opening and ending once to be respectful. But I don't like [this style of] pop, therefore I don't like [this style of] K-pop, and I will not be sitting through the songs again unless I'm watching the show with someone else who hasn't seen it before.
I didnât really have expectations as for what the intro/outro music should have been at all, but *coughs again* have you ever heard Bokuranoâs opening? Itâs fire.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=05p646nlYS0
3. Episode 1: Content
The part some people are upset with.
To be concise, the beginning was rushed. At length:Â
In the webtoon, I liked Headonâs entire presentation of the situation with the eel as he talks up the task to be impossible for Bam to achieve. We hear Bam personally consider the consequences, we see him quiet his fear and THEN he rushes towards it regardless with nothing but his knife. Then the exclamation âmarvelousâ from our administrator. I think the simple exchanges between the two make for a stronger scene.
Asides from that, the banter that the webtoon includes between Bam, Headon, Yuri and Evan is gone... At least in the source material we see the princess coming so it's not like she falls out of from nowhere with the kick. We know why she was coming, because she knows someone opened the gate on their own, and is sating her own curiosity to find out just who it is. She questions Headonâs fairness with never giving Bam a pocket, so here she is seen sticking up for him from the very beginning despite her rowdy introduction. She also questions Headon about the testâs level and asks him to lower it to be fair to Bamâs abilities (to which her comical yet degrading skills assessment forces an appeasing laugh out of him).
Then she asks Bamâs name, jokes about him being a player, then suddenly weâre back to serious and Bam is told he may never find what he is looking for and die here.Â
The narrative swishes back and forth between comedy and seriousness. Episode 2 of the anime reinforces this pattern with Shibisuâs introduction right after 300 or so people are slaughtered for the completion of the test. He and Yuri are examples of this style of comedy, very easy going people who quickly change face when they feel like it and help the narrative effect.
Aside from these differences, the beginning for both materials is sudden and leaves many questions. So no, the anime adaptation for the first episode did not ruin the show. It is equally as abrupt as the first time I read it, albeit with even less content. If new fans really want to get ahead, they will come to the webtoon and read the story anyway, and if they start on chapter 1 theyâll see the differences immediately and be enlightened, that is all. Same conclusion: new, happy fans, just the way we used to be.
--Aside--
Ah, that fated day...
I found Tower of God on a beloved manga pirating site. I had clicked it for the lone silhouette of a boy child:
That picture alone piqued my interest.
If that scantalation team or the website moderators--whoever it was--if it wasnât for THIS picture up during that particular time in history, I probably would have never been drawn to try this title on my own. *shivers* Where would I be without knowing the 25th Baam...?
--End of Aside--
On my first chapter, I had no problem with the art direction. I must have been short on patience that day, however, because as soon as I saw Yuriâs brash introduction as she was questioning Baam up and down (like even before giving him Black March) I was ready to click off the manhwa. I harshly judged her trope before giving her a chance, and like I said I wasnât familiar with the comedy flow yet so I thought her lines were cheap and uninteresting.
I ALMOST clicked off right then, but I hesitated and kept reading. Now I love her as big sister Yuri, and hints of this take on her character are present as I mentioned before. But hark? The anime sort of does her as a more haughty, â...unbelievable. You donât even know who i am...Iâm a miGHtY prINCeSs of JaHadDd uR iGnorance iS imMeAsUrable what even ArE yOu, how do you expect to survive in this worllldâÂ
....like she doesnât treat him like that in the webtoon, sheâs just here to have fun. I...I donât understand that decision but, you know, itâs okay. Tower of God has an anime, yâall. Weâre alive to see this happening.
4. Voice Acting: I honestly look forward to a dub if there will be one. It's not bad by any means. For me, Rachel's VA has the tastiest delivery. Bam... I wanted him to sound more distinctive and cute... It would be nice if he could sound like 9S (NieR: Automata) or Mob from Mob Psycho...I really like the take on those two.
-- - - - - - -END OF THE LINE: - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -
I think we will be fine, letâs all wait together...
Iâm off to watch a pirated episode 3 now. Thank you for coming.
It seems Tumblr mobile version is, and always will be, trash.
*Translation: Tower of God Anime Adaptation commentary coming later today*

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Rewind: Tower of God Episode 305 and 309
I have something to say about Rachel.
I paused when I read this for the first time.
Panic, disdain. Scratching at her restored visage. A despaired scream.
 For Yura, how sad it must have been to see her idol having a mental breakdown upon returning to her own skin.Â
Rachel...absolutely hates herself.
No matter what spite any character in-universe or the fandom throws at her, Rachel isn't truly suffering from the feelings of others. In the world of TOG where many are made to kill others to progress through these tests anyway, the only poor choice she's made is detesting herself.
I believe this scene points towards the belief that she's âuglyâ on the inside and out, and she was not shy to point it out in her new persona âIcarusâ which she thought she could keep. In both instances of confidence and despair, she is vocally ashamed of her original image. She still wants to be liked and trusted (the way her counterpart Bam is), and she felt as if she could start over at least part of that for herself if her new body was preserved and taken to the outer world. As she said to Androssi in Episode 261, there is a bloody history with both of them but sheâs seen as the nasty b!tch and Androssi is the cool-headed princess.Â
However Rachel...unlike Androssi, you allow your weaknesses to hold you in place (a mental turmoil).
I'm sure many people weâve met have betrayed teammates like Rachel has to Bam, but you would never know that by observing their present state. Even non-main characters might be a loved parent now, a respected ranker, have a team of friends who believe in them, or maybe theyâre just working as a bank teller in a peaceful town. Even if they regret some things from their past, they do not have such a profound sense of disgust towards themselves so debilitating that they freeze; they keep moving.
The problem is, Rachel...you shouldn't be upset that Bamâs friends are upset with you after you hurt Bam. That's generally how friends work. No, you're comparatively no worse than anyone else, but yes, the timing of your betrayal came when everyone knew your face and thought you were at most a neutral party. You should have resolve and confidence in your decisions instead of being indignant about your moral standing on one hand (episode 261), and on the other hand calling yourself weak (and affected by the gaze of others). What do you actually WANT for yourself, Rachel? We will see later on, but for now I see a desire for acceptance. You want true friendship and trust but you are unable to first extend that trust to others. You even have that manta ray hatred-fueled power up thing which... I hope becomes useful for you one day. I kind of forgot what it did already aside from threatening Bam and Androssi/Endorsi gosh I don't remember which one anymore. I should re read this story again before April...
Ah.
Most importantly: this point in the story addresses both Rachel and Baamâs development as individuals, how they see themselves. Bamâs sworn enemy was himself. A fear of the person he had temporarily become as Viole, a vessel of revenge for someone else. Being led to do things without his own heart; losing his sense of self. Fighting for FUG, for his motherâs revenge, for his fatherâs revenge, for all who detest Jahad; all events and emotions he had no part of but he is involved with now.
But look at the answer he finds in episode 299 after confronting the aspects of himself which lie within:
They were both unhappy with their current states. But Bam embraced his existence in this arc and Rachel threw her own worth away. Thatâs the, uh...the point.
...Tower of God Season 3 Episode 14
I'm back.
*sighs*
No one will believe me, but when we first saw the power surging from Khun's body at the end of the chapter after being stabbed by that dude running with Rachel, I made a post about the sweetfish possibly coming back.
I've been silent for a long time because Tumblr hurt me. It hurt me bad. That entry was full of jokes and dialogue and pictures, but after I posted it s0me5hinG wenT w4oNGgg, 404 or a relative and my post was gone. I got sad and rewrote it and tried again, but it still didn't work the second time.
So I got mad.
Then I stopped writing about TOG.
... But I'm back I guess. I'll probably follow the episodes again on here. And hopefully the anime coming in April will be nice...I have faith. There is good in this world.
Here's a months late joke about Khun getting pwned...
Look familiar?