I've seen a lot of posts - here and elsewhere - where people have expressed discomfort or shame about being an Edelgard fan, because she's so controversial and so vociferously disliked by some. I assume most of you saying that are pretty young. Maybe this is the first time you've liked a character quite so polarizing in something quite so popular. Maybe that's not you, and this just hit really close to home.
But as a 20+year veteran of online fandom spaces, may I offer some advice? (And yeah, most of it can be applied generally - I just happen to be on my own road to hell with El.)
1. It is okay to like Edelgard
Don't let anyone tell you who to love from media. It's fiction. You can love the darkest villain, the most Mary Sue-esque perfect princess, the pretty boy, the monster with a heart of gold. You can love characters you disagree with, because they're interesting or you like their story arc. You can love simple characters. Complex ones. Stereotypical ones. And you can love Edelgard. Someone wants to call you "stan" or "deluded" or whatever nonsense they intend to make you doubt your own ability to make decisions for yourself, to know what you like?
Well, that brings me to point #2.
Block. People. Who are just looking to start shit and be nasty. Honestly. What are they going to do, have a hissy fit? Let 'em. They mean nothing. They didn't get their trouble, and now they're behaving like a toddler. Well, that's their choice.
Is it hard to do? Yes. But if it hurts your feelings, reading their words, whether directed at you, directed at a fandom, or just written as a general screed, don't engage. Block, and move on. They cannot hurt you.
Two wrongs don't make a right - we've all heard it, right? If you don't want to be called "delusional" for defending that "fascist" Edelgard, don't turn around and accuse Dimitri/Claude/Rhea/Dorte/whoever fans of being the same. No fandom is a collective. Which leads to...
4. Again: No fandom is a collective
Fandoms are as diverse as real human communities. You'll always have your loud assholes. You'll always have your quiet creators who just do their thing and never enter the fray of the drama. But most people are just there to meet some like-minded folks and headcanon and have fun. No fandom is wholly "toxic," and I honestly hate that term slapped on a whole group of people. That said - be what you want the fandom to be. You can't be the fandom police, but you can make your small part of it welcoming to both new people and new ideas (even if you disagree with them). Leading nicely to...
5. Discussions are not arguments
I have friends who adore Dimitri. Claude. Mercie. Dorothea. Shamir. Ashe. Rhea, even. Do you know how much fun it is to have long discussions where we pull in all our different interpretations and viewpoints and personal favorites? It's delightful. We aren't fighting, even when we don't agree. Which is another reason not to dismiss someone simply because they lean towards a different house than yours - think of how 3H might have turned out if Edelgard, Dimitri, and Claude hadn't essentially had zero communication with one another. Reach across the aisle and have discussions - not arguments and pettiness.
I know how important Edelgard is to you. Believe me: I know. I've been the kid who cried in desperate desire to talk to fictional characters who I absolutely knew would get me better than any of the assholes in real life. Yes - Edelgard is an anchor for you, and that is fine.
But learn to laugh at her - and sometimes, at yourself. Learn to mock it. I know, I know, El doesn't understand teasing. But you do. It's okay to laugh at just how ridiculous it all is sometimes. It doesn't mean you love her any less. Laugh at them all, this ridiculous motley crew. It's a lot of fun to poke fun.
7. It is okay to like Edelgard
Yeah, I'm saying it again. Like her. Love her. Don't let anyone ever make you believe it is wrong, or that it means there is something wrong with you. Because it isn't, and it doesn't.
It's okay to be a fan of Edelgard.
It is okay to be a fan of Edelgard.
(But no throwing daggers at anyone!)