a y e s h a

And in that moment, i knew something was not right.

I don't want to live there anymore. I want to live here in my present.

But most importantly, whom I consider as a sister.

I am really not okay with what you did. I keep telling myself to be okay and let it go.

But really, I can't.

I can't and don't want to disregard how I feel.

After so many years that I always consider other people's feelings before mine when I get hurt and after so many people-pleasing conversations, this time, I will choose myself.

I get affected easily that is why, from here then on, I don't want to have to do anything with you. I will voluntarily cut myself from you. The toxic friendship you've shown me breaks my heart but that will only be the last time that you will do to me.

It is hard, but seeing myself get mentally exhausted/ill for people not worth it, makes it even harder for me. And I have learned that I am first and foremost my best friend.

Our values don't match. You not taking accountability to your actions just shows you the person you are.

You may have your own personal reasons for doing this but this does not mean that you can just hurt anybody. You don't use your sickness against me or anybody else just because you can't take consequences of your actions.

What a year indeed.

The first 2 months, everything went smoothly. Not until March 2024 came and damn, what a twist of events.

There were so many downs, BUT there were also so many ups as well. I fell down so many times, but I got back up many times, too.

I lost friends along the way but I gained a lot of friends, too. Waaaaay better friends than before.

Was not financially independent due to bills and help with the family, but still I am thankful that we always find ways for solutions.

Got to attend my og KPOP girl group concert and saw the four of them for the first time.

I am thankful for the people who stayed, for the ones who correct me if I am wrong, support me for doing something I love, who love me despite my flaws, and for being the best people in my life.

2024 has taught me that you win some, then you learn some.

It may not be my best year, yet. But despite the challenges, I am happy and I thank God for the gift of life. For me, for my partner, for my family and for my loved ones.

I feel betrayed by someone whom I called my "friend" and "sister" but unfortunately, i do not know what I did wrong and they talked behind my back.

Nakakalungkot lang na may mga taong ganito. All you did was give a genuine friendship but instead, they gave u a heartbreak.

And I promise that this will be the last time that I will let people treat me like this. I am so done with this kind of shit.