Call me delulu

Your foot taps on the marble flooring, leg practically vibrating with nerves.

“As a reminder, your final will be worth almost half your grade,” your teacher continues, pointing at the syllabus she’s displayed on the white board. You hadn’t paid much attention to it the first day of school, mostly because it was never something you had to worry about before.

School’s always been easy for you. One of the lucky ones, your mom would say. Your brain was almost like a sponge with how easily it soaked in new information.

But this class–yeah. It was no joke. And your grade was definitely seeing the results of that.

“To those of you with less than proficient grades at the moment,” your professor's eyes lock onto yours, which makes the anxiety stirring in your chest even worse. “I would heavily suggest finding a tutor.”

A tutor.

You’ve never needed a tutor before. You were the one doing the tutoring. Now you’ve become just like those students that used to come to you for help, and you’d be lying if you said your ego wasn’t taking a hit.

The big fat D you’d gotten on your last test flashes through your mind. Just one in a sea of bad grades, all that were pulling your grade into places you’ve only heard of.

You need to do well on this final if you want to pass the class, that much is obvious. But who the hell would you even ask? You don’t really know anyone here besides Riki, but he’s somehow doing even worse than you are, which is saying something.

Your eyes flicker around the room, darting from face to face in the hopes anyone will look promising.

And then your eyes land on him. Yang Jungwon. He’s sitting in the very back, glasses pushed up his nose and his cardigan bundled around him. To anyone who doesn’t know him, you’re sure he looks the picture of innocence. Just a studious guy who definitely doesn’t spend his time hanging around with his frat brothers and fucking anything that moves.

But you know Jungwon. You understand what subunit of men he falls under.

He’s a womanizer to the highest degree. And the worst kind at that, because he knows that women will fall at his feet without him even having to lift a finger.

You can’t stand guys like that. Men who think that they are entitled to sex simply because they’re attractive. It doesn’t help that most girls are too blind to look further into what type of man he is before they fall into his bed.

Or maybe you’re just thinking too much into it. Though you doubt that.

When class ends, you almost don’t walk over there. It’s too embarrassing, you think. To have to admit to anyone–especially Yang Jungwon–that you need help.

But then the failing grade you’ll surely get if you don’t has you swallowing your pride and forcing yourself to walk over to him.

He doesn’t notice you at first, too busy packing his laptop into his bag. You can actually look at him now that you’re so close and not halfway across the room.

Black hair. Deep, brown eyes. If he was anyone else, you might even think he was attractive. But the thought of falling into his honey-lined trap has you completely disregarding the idea.

You clear your throat, fingers messing idly with the hem of your sweater. “Hey.” You say, the word coming out as more of an awkward squeak then anything else.

He lifts his head to you, eyes looking over you lazily, like he was expecting this. Like he was expecting you. You know that’s probably just your insecurity speaking, but it still makes you feel hot with embarrassment.

He shoulders the strap of his bag. “What’s up?”

It takes everything in you to not turn tail and run. Just looking at him and imagining the smug look you’re sure will wash over his face makes you want to scream. You have half the mind to think he’ll assume you’re asking for help because you want in his pants, which is simply just not true.

You have never wanted anything more than to stay completely away from that STD-machine he calls his dick.

You sigh and run a hand through your hair, ignoring the tangles that catch along your fingers as you do. “You’re good at Anatomy, right?”

He just shrugs. “Depends.”

You raise a brow. “Depends on what?”

His lips raise slightly, threatening to break into a smirk. “On why you’re asking.”

Even though every single fiber of your body screams at you to find literally anyone else, you force yourself to say the words anyway. “I need a tutor,” you mumble.

Jungwon doesn’t look surprised in the least. He hums and takes a small step closer to you. “A tutor, huh?”

You take a step back. “That’s what I said, isn’t it?” You don’t mean for your tone to come out as hostile as it does, but it’s impossible to not feel irritated when it comes to Jungwon.

He huffs out a laugh. “Just making sure,” he says. “I never really took you as the type to need tutoring.”

I’m not, you want to say. Actually, I’d probably beat you out in every other class.

But you doubt offending him is going to make him want to help you. So, instead, you just sigh out, “yeah, well, I do. So are you going to help me or not?”

He pauses for a moment, like he really has to think about it, before he shrugs and gives you a small nod. “Sure, why not? I’ll tutor you.”

Your lips slip into a tight lipped smile. It’s the most polite thing you can really manage at the moment.

“Okay. Cool. Let’s meet at the library this weekend?”

Jungwon shakes his head. “Nah, come by my dorm. Better learning environment.”

You just roll your eyes. If he thinks the two of you will be doing anything except for studying, then he’s a lot dumber than he claims to be.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖༄

In all honesty, you don’t really understand how you got here. On your knees in between Jungwon's thigh, while he fists a handful of your hair and forces his cock down your throat.

You’d been studying—at least, you think so. You aren’t sure if you can call him laughing at you everytime you messed up an answer studying.

“Come on, baby, open up for me.” He grunts, palm practically encasing your skull and pushing you further down onto his dick. Spit dribbles at the corner of your mouth, threatening to drip onto your chest.

You choke around his length, your nails digging into his thighs. He hasn’t let you up for air once–hasn’t even pretended he was going to give you some kind of reprieve. Instead, he’s laughed at you for it.

You flatten your tongue against the base, flicking the tip of the muscle against the vein running up his cock. He groans at the feeling, head tilting back before he forces himself to look down at you again. As if he doesn’t want to miss a second of this.

The feeling of his tip hitting the back of your throat makes a fresh onslaught of tears cloud your already blurry vision, and Jungwon has the audacity to smirk at it.

He wraps your hair around his knuckles and forces you off his cock. You splutter for air as you come up, chest heaving and lips swollen. You can still taste his pre-cum on your tongue.

“You cryin’?” He asks, though he says it without any type of concern.

You feel your lower lip wobble with embarrassment. “I-I’m not–”

“No, you are.” He grins. “What? Is my cock too big for your tiny throat?”

Part of you wants to say yes—wants to scream at him for being too rough. Actually, you want to scream at yourself for getting into this situation.

But then you think about the smug look that will no doubt be on his face if you tell him exactly what he wants to hear. So, instead, you take in a breath and take him back into your mouth.

He gasps as you do, and you mentally give yourself a point. You might be the one with his cock down your throat, but you're also the one with most of the power. At least, for now.

You swirl your tongue around the tip, lapping up the precum that drizzles in steady streams. Jungwon doesn’t shy away from being loud, and the moans that pour from him encourages you to take him deeper.

This time, you remind yourself to relax your throat and breathe through your nose. And ever so slowly, you manage to take him all the way to the base. Your nose smushes against his pelvis bone, filling your senses with sweat and his expensive cologne.

“Fuck!” He practically yelps, little whimpers falling from his lips the longer you deepthroat him. “Good fucking girl,” he gasps, “all you’re good for, right? Sucking dick and, hah, nothing else?” He chuckles, but it’s shaky. “Can’t even pass a fucking final.”

The reminder makes something twist low in your chest. A mix of embarrassment and…arousal. The reminder is a low blow, you’re sure he knows that, but it doesn’t piss you off like you think it should. Instead, heat pools between your legs, and you have to rub your thighs together in the hopes you might get any kind of relief.

Jungwon sees it, because of course he does. “You like that? Being reminded of just how fucking dumb you really are?”

You attempt to deny, but the words come out muffled. It sounds more like you’re gargling then anything else.

“Can’t even speak properly, stupid, stupid girl.” He laughs.

But even though he’s trying to play it cool, you can feel the way his thighs are shaking. Can feel how his hips jerk up every-so-often, searching for even more friction. Greedy.

You hollow out your cheeks, and force yourself to take him even deeper. His tip has far surpassed the back of your throat, forcing you to gag around him.

He lets out a long, high-pitched sound that nearly sounds like a wail. “Oh, fuck, I’m gonna cum–”

His hips jerk uncontrollably into your mouth, and then he’s spilling into you. Ropes of cum fill your throat. The taste is bitter and tangy, and your nose scrunches up at it.

You want to spit it out like you do with every other guy, but he forces you off of him, deep dark eyes looking into yours, and he says, “swallow.”

If someone were to ask you why later, you’d tell them you were under spells. That Yang Jungwon put a curse on you and that’s why you listened.

But you know the truth.

Your throat bobs as you swallow the milky substance, and he grins as he watches it go down. He brings a hand up to your chin, and then uses his thumb to part your lips. “Open.” He says. You listen.

You part your lips and let your tongue fall from your mouth, showing him that you’d done exactly as he said.

He makes a sound deep in his chest, something akin to a rumble, and then uses his thumb to press down on your tongue. When he’s satisfied with what he sees, he retracts his hand and runs it through your messy hair. “Good girl.”

You hate that the praise goes right to your core.

He stands then, grabbing you by your arms and forcing you to your feet. He spins you around so the back of your knees hit the mattress. “You wanted to study right?” He murmurs against your ear. His breath sends a shiver down your spine. “Then let’s study.”

He pushes you down onto the bed, and then immediately positions himself on top of you and crashes his mouth onto yours. The kis is messy, his tongue licking into your mouth and driblets of saliva falling from the corners of your lips.

He kisses you like a man starved. Like you’re the only girl in the world. He kisses you like he could never get enough of it.

Slowly, he trails his hand down your stomach, all the way to the hem of your sweatpants. He doesn’t even give you a moment to realize what he’s doing, too busy keeping you occupied with his mouth. It’s not until he’s cupping you through your panties do you realize.

You gasp against his lips, and he smirks. Like he was expecting that reaction from you.

“For every question you get right,” he starts, lips ghosting yours. “I’ll give you some relief. Okay?”

Your eyes fly open, eyebrows knitting together at the sheer audacity. This is how he’s choosing to tutor you? By holding your own pleasure over your head?

“Jungwon–”

He ignores you. “Where part of the female body has the highest concentration of concentrated nerves?” He asks.

You furrow your brows. You don’t remember ever learning about this. But the feeling of him against you, completely unmoving, is enough to have you pouring out answers.

“The, um, the breast?” You murmur.

Jungwon clicks his teeth. “You really are just a dumb slut, aren't you?” He laughs, emphasizing his words with a light pat to your pussy. You jolt at the sensation, a breathless, needy sound falling from your lips.

You swallow, cheeks growing hot from humiliation. “I don’t know, Jungwon. We–We never learned this!”

But he doesn’t care. “Use that brain of yours and think. Unless you can’t even do that.”

You swallow, thinking of every single spot in your body that might have a good amount of nerve endings. Your fingertips, maybe? Or the skin at the bottom of your feet? Or the–oh.

The clitoris.

“The clitoris.” You mumble, voice barely above a whisper.

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you.”

You let out a huff of frustration. “The clit.” You say louder.

Jungwon grins, teeth on display as he does. “Smart girl.”

And then his hand is pulling your panties to the side and he’s rubbing your clit with his thumb. The pressure is light, just a featherlight touch to show you he’s there, but it’s enough to have you squirming.

“What chemical is released in the brain during intercourse?” He brings a finger up to your entrance and his thumb furthers the pressure on your nub. The feeling is intoxicating to say the least, bordering on not enough.

But, you genuinely have no idea the answer to his question. “Um, d-dopamine?”

He forces a finger inside your hole, immediately curling it against that spongy spot inside you. You cry out at the feeling, hands searching for anything to grip on. One of them settles on the sheets, while the other settles on his bicep. He raises a brow. “Maybe you aren’t that stupid after all.”

The next agonizing ten minutes pass like that, with him asking you questions you couldn’t possibly know the answer to and withholding pleasure every time you get it wrong.

It’s absolutely infuriating and extremely arousing all at the same time.

It takes a second, but you eventually feel that familiar coil begin to tighten in your stomach. Your hips roll against his fingers, chasing any and all relief he’s willing to give you.

“Fuck, ‘m gonna cum—” You gasp.

But Jungwon doesn’t let you. He slips his fingers from your cunt, leaving you unbearably empty, and you nearly sob at the feeling.

“No, no, no,” you cry.

Jungwon laughs. He brings his fingers to his lips and sucks them clean, never breaking eye contact with you as he does.

“You think you deserve to cum?” He questions, leaning down licking up the stray tear that falls from your eye. His tongue trails from your cheek all the way to the corner of your eye. “Girls who can’t even pass a simple anatomy final don’t get to cum.” He mumbles against your skin.

You whine. You don’t even care about your pride anymore. All you can think about is the release that was ripped from you.

Jungwon pauses, lips quirking up slightly as he seems to get an idea. He leans in even closer, lips brushing your ear, and he says, “not unless they beg for it.”

You swallow. On any other day, you’d laugh in his face for even suggesting it. You begging Yang Jungwon to let you cum? Yeah, in his fucking dreams.

But now the idea isn’t that far-fetched.

You avert your gaze. “Please.” You murmur.

“Ah-ah,” he tsks, hand grabbing your chin and forcing your gaze back onto his. “Say it like you mean it.”

Your cheeks are burning with embarrassment. Your entire body trembling with want and with the urge to run away. But you swallow it down, because the want to have some kind of release overpowers any humiliation you might be stuck with afterwards.

“Please,” you say louder. “Please let me cum. Please, Wonnie, I need it so bad.”

He groans, eyes squeezing shut momentarily before he’s reaching down and aligning his cock with your folds.

He doesn’t give you any type of warning, just pushes the head of his cock into your hole and doesn’t even give you a chance to adjust as he pushes himself to the hilt.

You let out a drawn out whine, your legs trembling as you attempt to accommodate his length. He’s big—bigger than anything you’ve taken before— and you swear you feel him in your throat.

“Fuck, you’re tight,” he mumbles, burying his face in your neck.

Slowly, he begins to roll his hips into yours, punching the air from your lungs everytime he rubs against your g-spot.

“W-Won—” You mumble, practically going cross-eyed. Your nails take down his back and leave long, red lines in their wake. Lines he’ll proudly wear and show off for the next week.

“Such a dumb baby,” he laughs. “Needing me to tutor you and ending up with my cock in you instead. Is this what you wanted? Wanted me to fill you up with my cum and make you a mommy?”

Your eyes widen at the idea. It should turn you off. You’re too young and you can’t stand Jungwon. Having a family with him would really be the end of you as you know it.

But, instead the idea of him filling you with his cum over and over again until it takes has you pulsing around him.

You shake your head, but it’s weak. Insincere.

“Yeahhhh, you do. Dirty fucking slut.” He brings a hand down your body until he finds your clit and begins rubbing circles into the nub.

You cry out, thighs shaking. Your orgasm builds quicker this time after he’d denied you the last time. This time, you don’t bother warning him, though you’re sure he can feel it.

“Gonna cum on my cock, baby?” He asks, tone filled with fake concern. “Go on then. You earned it.”

That’s all it takes before you’re breaking, your back arching and eyes rolling back from the force of it. Your blood practically goes cold and your vision goes white.

It’s intense, and Jungwon moans at the feeling of you pulsing around him.

“Shit—gonna fill you up, okay? Gonna fill up my dumb fucking girl.”

He cums with a small groan, his load shooting into you and painting your walls a ghastly white.

When it’s over, you lay there and let your mind wander as he catches his breath.

You, despite vowing not to, just let Jungwon fuck you. And even though you know you should, you don’t regret it in the least.

Yeah, you’re another notch on his ever growing belt. Yeah, next time you see him you’re going to want to die.

But…you’ve never had anyone fuck yoh that good before. Now you understand why so many girls beg him for seconds.

He lets out a shaky breath as he pulls out of you, his chest still heaving.

And then, without an ounce of shame, he says, “same time next week?”

You are so screwed.

im so horny hungry

An hour later, you find yourself in the studio with Martin, Seonghyeon, and Keonho. The boys are loudly laughing and yelling into the mic, joking around in between takes of a demo song.

You watch with the smallest bit of envy in you. Why can't you joke around with them like that? Your thoughts are cut off when Martin comes up to you.

"Yo! Come on, let's get you on the mic for this part." he exclaims, brightening your thoughts.

You stand, hopping up from your seat and walking quickly over to the mic. Since Martin had just used it, he adjusts it to your height and then steps back.

"Okay, demo lyrics are here and now just go with the flow of the beat. You can switch between rapping and vocalizing." Martin informs.

"I've only ever heard you rap a bit, you sing too?" Seonghyeon asks, to which you provide a nod before putting the headphones on your head.

Once the beat starts playing and you analyze the flow you think about how the lyrics will piece together. You're aware that the lyrics are changeable since Martin had let you know they were demo lyrics.

After about 15 minutes of you quietly going over your verses, you give a thumbs up. Martin starts the beat again and enables the recording for the verse.

As you start to sing, everything around you disappears. It almost feels like the world turned black and the only thing light is what you're doing right now.

The feeling you are harboring makes all the hate and comments fly away. This is your dream, this is what you are meant to do and you love it. Singing really was your first love and you can't find anything else that would make you this happy.

As of right now, there might be one thing that's starting to make you as happy. Though, the thought of that makes you want to shut down in a way, so you push it down.

After your verse is finished, Martin smiles and nods. His reaction isn't too big, since you two had been in the studio before. As you look to the other two, the shock on their faces are there.

"Holy shit! That was amazing," Seonghyeon exclaims, coming up and giving you a few hard pats on your back.

You thank him profusely while also telling him it's not that big of a deal. Then, your eyes wander over to Keonho who is staring at you in awe with his lips parted. His cheeks are slightly red for some reason, which makes your brows furrow the smallest amount.

"Pick your jaw up, Keonho" Martin laughs.

Seonghyeon joins in with a chuckle as well, "We're not cleaning up your drool either."

You let out a small laugh before walking over to the couches and plopping down. Seonghyeon and Martin huddle up and start composing the last part of the lyrics together.

"You're so talented." Keonho speaks under his breath as he sits down next to you on the couch. His arm naturally finds its way to the cushion behind you.

"Oh, thank you, I appreciate it."

"I'm serious, honey, I don't think I've ever heard someone sing the way you do." he adds that stupid pet name, which makes you suppress a shiver.

The compliment leaves you silent, not because of the words, but because of his voice and tone. You nod your head as your cheeks flush up the smallest amount, which you notice is starting to happen a lot with Keonho.

"I dunno what to say," you admit.

"You don't have to say anything." he replies back before grabbing the lyrics he was given, "Wanna help me figure these out?"

A smile breaks out on your face at how simple he makes things. One second you're a nervous wreck because of something he said, the next you're completely comfortable. You've come to the conclusion that the nervous you feel around him is a good nervous, so you offer a small nod of your head.

"Perfect, I was thinking that I could sing this part here..."

Being too absorbed in the bubble the two of you have created, you fail to notice Seonghyeon and Martin. The two boys are now staring directly at you two as they watch Keonho's arm slowly make its way closer to your shoulders.

Once Keonho successfully finishes his mission, Seonghyeon huffs out an amused scoff, "I know we've said it before, but he's in love with her."

Martin smirks at the comment and nods along, "I give it a month before something happens. Maybe two if Keonho chickens out."

"Do you think she likes him?"

Martin pauses before answering, "I think so, but I don't think either of them know it yet. He's the only one she really feels comfortable with right now."

Seonghyeon purses his lips as he thinks about that fact, "We should spend some more time with her. I hate to see her so shelled up all the time."

Martins agrees before both boys decide to talk about this at a later time, hopefully with everyone. Instead, they spend their time in the studio by refocusing on the lyric sheet in front of them.

Later that evening, when everyone's home from studios or practice rooms, they notice a small shift. The dorm is more lively, and by that, they mean you.

Instead of staying to yourself or chatting quietly with Keonho, you're brightly laughing and joking around with all the members. Still, Keonho is attached to your side the whole night.

His body language shows that he's calm, not really caring about much as he slumps into the soft cushions. However, his facial expression reveals more than anything. He's staring straight into your head with a look of admiration.

To Keonho, there's nothing he want's to see more than watch you open up with everybody. He watches as your eyes light up when James mentions a movie you like, then his eyes light up too. He smiles when you laugh at a joke Juhoon said.

"Keonho?" a voice calls out from somewhere, but all he can think is that it wasn't your voice.

"Hm?" he hums, lifting his gaze to find Seonghyeon smirking directly at him.

"You're so done, bro." Seonghyeon laughs before shaking his head and focusing back on the conversation in the dorm.

Keonho refocuses on you, now dropping his arm onto your shoulders like he's been doing recently. Unconsciously, you lean into his body as he pulls you in the slightest bit.

A small yawn escapes your mouth as you pull your knees up onto the couch. Keonho's arm tightens around you once he hears the yawn. James also quiets his voice.

"Should we do a movie night?" he suggests, looking around to all the members.

"Hell yeah, but no Spiderman tonight, we've watched it so many times this week." Seonghyeon replies as Martin agrees with him too.

Juhoon suggests some type of drama and the boys groan before reluctantly agreeing. Usually they end up getting way to into the drama's and claiming they never complained in the first place.

Not long after the movie starts, your eyes start to feel way too heavy and you start your fight with sleep. The drama look really good, you can't lie, but the feeling of exhaustion is creeping up fast.

You let yourself relax into Keonho's side, furthering the sleepy feeling clouding up your head. What completely messes you up is when Martin stands to dim the lights in order to "make movie night better."

Once those lights dim, your vision does too. You let yourself slump into Keonho and your eyelids come over your irises. The last thing you register is Keonho's arm tightening around you and a soft whisper leave his mouth.

"Shh, just rest."

You nod into his chest and finally let yourself succumb to the urge. Keonho's warm, soft, and most definitely comfortable, making him a great place to sleep right now.

A few minutes later, James glances over and smiles at the both of you. He points it out to everyone with the biggest smirk on his face. Keonho ends up shooing their eyes away once he glares at them.

"Martin, can you make popcorn?" Seonghyeon asks, to which Keonho shushes him angrily.

Seonghyeon looks over with furrowed brows and a confused expression at Keonho's sudden shush. Instead of replying with words, Keonho points to you, who's still very much asleep on his chest.

"Then take her into her room, Lover Boy." Juhoon speaks up without glancing away from the drama still playing on the TV.

"I'm not a Lover Boy."

"Sure you aren't," Martin scoffs, "That's why you're always drooling over her."

"I am not drooling-" Keonho's voice raises, but he cuts himself off once he feels you stir the smallest bit against him. He stops talking for a minute, looking down, then speaks quieter, "Whatever, I'm taking her to our room."

James chuckles before watching Keonho wake you by rubbing a hand down your shoulder and whispering in your ear. His voice is too low and quiet to be heard by the other members, but combined with the touch it wakes you up.

"Honey, why don't we go to our room?"

There's a small hum of acknowledgment on your part before you pull yourself up, half asleep. The boys all bid goodnights, to which you mumble one back and offer a wave.

Keonho stands up and says goodnight to the members before walking you to your shared room. His hand stays planted on your lower back as he guides your drowsy body through the halls.

Once you make it to the bathroom, the two of you brush your teeth in silence. He had originally turned the light on, but it was too fluorescent for your liking so you let out a groan. He caved and turned it off and mumbling an apology.

Once finished, he guides you straight back into the bedroom and pulls your covers off for you. Right after you climb in, he tucks them around you and starts to make his way over to his bed.

"Keonho?"

"Hm?"

"Come back, you were warm and now I'm cold," you grumble, not thinking clearly and just seeking warmth.

His eyes widen, but once he sees your sleepy eyes blearing at him, he knows he can't resist you. He nods before changing into a white t-shirt and strolling over to your bed. He decides it's better to sit on the edge instead of crawling under the covers with you.

"Keonho, you can come fully in." you let out a small giggle.

He laughs with you for a second before laying under the blanket with you. His arm comes around your shoulders and he pulls you into his body again.

"Am I sleeping here?" he asks, looking down to your face.

"Do you want to?"

He nods, and tightens his hold again. Once your head lands on his chest again his muscles loosen up. He lets out a small sigh of contentment as his hand comes up to rub your back.

Your arms wrap around him as well and you end up tracing small shapes onto his chest. The sleepiness you had felt on the couch rushes back as you melt into Keonho's presence.

"Honey?"

"Yeah?" you speak into his chest.

"Sleep, you're tired," he whispers into your hair, "I am too."

You offer one last nod before letting your eyes close and breathing even out. Keonho's hand doesn't stop it's soothing motion on your back until he's sure you're out.

Once he sees your lips part, he lets himself fall into a slumber, probably the best sleep he's had in a while. He knows waking up tomorrow will probably be awkward once you wake up, but he can't bring himself to care.

All Keonho knows is that where he is right now is warm, your bed sheets are fluffy, and the weight on his chest is comforting. He sleeps through the whole night, never once waking to a sound.

He doesn't even stir when the light comes through the door due to Seonghyeon and Martin sneaking in to spy. He doesn't wake up to the gasp from Juhoon and the picture that James snaps.

Later, when the house is quiet and the lights are off, the two of you shift in your sleep, but never once does his grip on you falter.