your #1 doughboy aficionado

Dodie (or Doll, or Dee)

| 29 | It/Its pronouns | Canadian |

previous usernames: ask-the-jthm-crew, psycho-doughart, whothefuckisdboy

(as a forewarning, if you interact with my posts in any way but have 'proship/profic/darkshipper/whatever' in your DNI list, i will block you by default. it's fine if you return it if i interact with you, just don't make a big deal out of it. you don't have to announce it, just block me.)

hi i'm Dodie (pronounced dough-dee, what a surprise) and i'm your lovable jerk for the evening. so what’s up everybody y'all ready for this

No one will ever be able to hate you so well, so knowingly, so precisely,

so well,

so well,

so well...

i think i should've clarified my own definition of asexuality. i don't identify as asexual myself nor have i read every single piece of literature about the topic, but as far as i understand it, asexuality is the very limited or the complete lack of sexual attraction to other people and probably to anything in general, including objects, characters, scenarios ect. as far as i understand it, sexual attraction ≠ the desire to have sex. sexual attraction is more like an urge which is different from a desire. have you ever had the urge to throw your phone or even yourself off of a high place that you were standing near but you actually had no true desire to really do it? you probably have, a lot of people have felt that way and so have i. that's what i believe an urge is; it's more like a compulsion. desire is more genuine; it's a genuine want and acceptance of something.

basically, sexual attraction is an urge, a compulsion, to engage with others/things sexually. sexual desire (the libido? the sex drive? i'm not sure if there's a more specific name for it) is a genuine want and acceptance for sexual acts with others/things.

they're two separate things which often overlap and influence each other but that can also be experienced separately, and i think that asexuality is where a person experiences little to no sexual attraction (sexual compulsions) but that doesn't always preclude them from experiencing sexual desires (wanting sex).

an example of the separation between these two different feelings and how some people can experience one but not the other is straight men who are questioning/confused and experiment with other men; they aren't attracted to their sexual partners but still genuinely wish to have sex with them regardless.

i believe that sex repulsion is a strong feeling of fear/disgust/uncomfortableness with the act of literally practicing sex. it's the opposite of sexual desire. sex repulsed people may also feel repulsed by seeing others engaging in sexual activity or even with the very thought of sex, but the main thing is that they don't wish to actually participate themselves.

sexual arousal is also different from all of these things. sexual arousal is a physical response, it's physical stimulation and it doesn't automatically mean that sexual attraction or desire is present (ex: rape can cause sexual arousal but that doesn't mean that it's attractive to the victim or desired)

ace-orientation is a spectrum with lots of grey and "true asexuality" (as i've seen some people call it) is on the far end of the spectrum. if a person experiences feelings of sexual attraction and sexual desires but they also have negative feelings around those attractions/desires (ex: shame, guilt, insecurity, embarrassment, trauma, ect) then, in my opinion, i don't think that they qualify as asexual, sex repulsed, or even grey-ace.

so, about johnny.

sexual attraction and sexual desire feel similar and usually go together and asexual people often lack sexual desire too, so these two things often get conflated by people or people acknowledge that sexual attraction and sexual desire are two different things but believe that if you lack one then you automatically lack the other. so when i see people say that johnny is "canonically asexual" it bothers me because i think that they mean that he is either, at least, sex repulsed (lacks sexual desire) or that he both lacks sexual attraction AND is also sex repulsed because they view attraction and desire as a package set ("get one, get the other. lack one, lack the other")

i can understand why people see johnny this way, and i'm fine with headcanons, it just bothers me when people act like it's a fact because Nny is more vague then that. calling him asexual like it's a fact JUST because he said that he wouldn't rape anybody and that he hates touching people at all and that he would straight up rip his own dick off--while, like i said before, ignoring everything else that Nny said at the same time about how he hates all forms of human emotion and intimacy and doesn't want to give into them and wishes that he could shut them off but can't--puts words in the creators mouth and most importantly it reveals peoples' lack of understanding of sexual attraction, sexual desire, asexuality, sex repulsion, the grey side of the ace-spectrum, and it ignores how mental health issues and even personal philosophy can influence peoples' feelings and whether or not they ever actually decide to act on them or not--because a person can even have normal sexual attractions and desires but ultimately choose not to act on them for some other reason, like personal philosophy (ex: "i think sex is morally wrong") or mental health issues (ex: "i'm attracted to this person and genuinely want to have sex with them but i have insecurities or traumas that are holding me back")

i think that it's possible that johnny could be asexual and/or sex repulsed but there's lots of room for other possibilities too. personally, i think it's more likely that johnny is just repressed and that his hatred of sex and sexual feelings are a result of his 100 unaddressed mental health issues lmao

(i really hope this helped you better understand what i was trying to say. maybe you already understood but i just get worried that i don't speak clearly enough. if you don't mind i'd like you to post this ask publicly as well. feel free to ramble as much as you want about what you think about johnny and his sexuality/relationship with sex, i'd really like to hear it. and please let me know if my understanding of ace-orientation is wrong)

OMG NO PROB ANON!! 👍👍👍👍👍

i will post this ask without too many additional rambles on my interpretation... only because i just woke up and am unable to think properly lol

but i want your opinions knooown cuz i know exactly what you mean about how the fandom is DEAD set on assuming he is canonically ace, so it might be uncomfortable to comment on these things openly (because, as per any fandom way, the community can get... weirdly intense about these sort of things, regardless of whether its a civil discussion about a character or not). so LET ME BE YOUR VOICE... SOAPBOX.... THING.

personally i think every take on every aspect of the conversation 'Is Johnny The Homicidal Maniac an Asexual?' is the best thing ever, and i think that differs for everyone at least slightly... like tbh i share your opinion, but on a slightly more complex level it does differ, but that's because of my own view of asexuality and the greyness that surrounds it (again, from being ace myself)

https://ironic-really.tumblr.com/post/769282117684314112/not-saying-youre-wrong-but-when-did-jhonen-say

https://ironic-really.tumblr.com/post/769287095067017216/are-you-implying-that-you-think-nny-is-a-rapist

it's kinda always bothered me when people say with certainty that Nny is "canonically" asexual, cause when i read the parts in the comic where Nny talks and sex and desire (not just including sexual desire but all human desire) it just didn't seem as clear cut as that like a lot of other people say it is. some people have this habit of viewing cartoon characters sorta like real people and using the same things that they know about how real humans work in order to understand how characters work as if they're always a 1-to-1 comparison, and i don't relate to that. so, i think that these people who say that "Nny is canonically asexual because he said he hates sex" (which could be true i'm not denying that's a possibility) do so because their viewing him through a "real world" lens, and their understanding of what asexuality is in the real world is that it's just when you hate sex for any reason and don't want to have it, or that it's when you lack the ability to feel sexual attraction to other people, which they acknowledge is different from wanting to have sex, but they think that the two are always a package set and if you lack one then you lack the other by default, which i don't think is true but correct me if i'm wrong. it reveals a limited understanding of acespec orientations, how you can want and not want something at the same time, and all the different ways peoples relationship with sex/sexuality can work and why.

in the moments where Nny talks about sexual arousal and intimacy and touching in general (i'm mostly talking about what he says to tess when she accuses him of being responsible for the murder/rape that it was later revealed that jimmy committed) he also talks about how all human desires are disgusting to him and how he doesn't want to submit to any of them because it makes him feel like a slave to base human instincts and makes him feel empty. we know that nny still has natural human emotions, like anger, loneliness, hunger, and that he still gives in to these feelings and the fact that he also hates these feelings and wants nothing to do with them doesn't erase them from his life; so why should we assume that his hatred of emotion and desire would erase his desire for sex specifically? when Nny is rambling about how he hates submitting to feelings and how he aspires to be emotionally cold but can't, why would he bring up sex and arousal in this mix if we're to assume that those type of feelings don't exists in his life and thus wouldn't relevant to mention when speaking about emotions that he wishes he could become cold to?

when Nny is speaking to reverend meat Nny tells it that if he begins to give in to desire then he'll take drastic measures to remove the source: "then i'll kill my stomach if i'm hungry, shut off my want if i'm lonely, rip off my genitals i'm aroused" he says. he's likely felt hungry and lonely before and the fact that he doesn't what to doesn't prevent that, why would it be any different with sexual desire? why would he even bring up arousal if he doesn't already feel it along side things we definitely know he feels?

my point is that people can want to have sex but also not want to have it. people can have sexual desires but hate them and want to resist them. simply saying "i don't want to have sex" doesn't tell us exactly WHY you don't want to have it and there can be more then one reason why. i think the reason why people assume that Nny is asexual or maybe just sex repulsed is because they think that people either LOVE sex and think about it and have it all the time or they hate it and have zero cravings for it at all, but it can be more grey then that sometimes. anorexic people don't want to eat but they also do. they still get hungry and they still have an appetite, but they also have negative feelings around those desires that hold them back. some people feel the same way about sex/their sexuality and i think when Nny speaks about sex and arousal and all that stuff he's vague enough for that to possibly be the case with him.

i think the best piece of evidence in favor of the "Nny is asexual and/or sex repulsed" theory is what jhonen said in that one interview where he said "I don’t think he has a sex drive and if he does it finds its way out through other means, mainly a knife through the flesh.". creators ultimately control their characters so if jhonen comes out and confirms that Nny is asexual and/or sex repulsed then that's it, but he hasn't spoken about Nnys sexuality beyond this interview and i don't think that quote even sounds very certain. "i don't think" and "if he does" sounds less certain then if he had said "he doesn't" and "if he did" which sounds more final. jhonen also said in that same interview right before that other quote "He's a coward and i think it manifests itself in many ways. One of them being the fact that's he's disgusted with sexuality.". i don't think people who are asexual and/or sex repulsed are cowards. calling them cowards implies that they can work towards becoming braver and change. i'm pretty sure asexual and/or sex repulsed people just are the way that they are.

it's hard to find people who agree with me on this topic and i'm kinda scared to talk to other people about this because i'm afraid of being called an acephobe. it's fine if people want to headcanon johnny as ace, i just have a problem with people saying that it's canon. i don't think that characters need to basically look right into the camera and flatly say "i. am. asexual." for it to be canon, writers can imply it enough to where it can be reasonable enough to assume it's canon and have it just be all but confirmed, but i just think that in johnnys case the evidence and level of implication isn't much. calling johnny "canonically asexual" just because he said that he's disgusted with it while ignoring everything else he said about how giving into emotion is a form of "slavery" and how touching "only reminds me of the emptiness" only makes sense if your understanding of sexuality and peoples relationship with sex is kinda black and white. it ignores things like insecurity, trauma, weird psycho-sexual complexes and other mental health issues that can make peoples relationship with sex/sexuality different just to place the spot light on asexuals.

also it's just pretty unlikely that jhonen was seriously thinking about acespec identities at all back when he was making JTHM. nobody was thinking about that stuff in the 90s.

well, whether johnny is asexual, sex repulsed or not i'm still going to make porn of him.

(if you don't mind i'd like you to post this ask publicly so that other people could see it and maybe i could get some people to see what i see)

UM WELL FIRST OF ALL ANON YOUR ASK DELIGHTS ME AND I'M SO GLAD WE SHARE COMRADERY OVER THIS VIEW ON THE MATTER BECAUSE YES YESSS YOU SEE IT YOU SEE MY VISION PERFECTLY I JUST dfHJfhJgHG HhgH AHGHGhgfgFGHfg

AHEM. anyways......

asexuality is a very fickle term and i don't think a lot of people want to acknowledge how fickle it is. because yes, exactly, a LOT of things can contribute to being asexual that aren't as black & white as 'they whole-heartedly enjoy sex vs they have literally no interest in it whatsoever'. there can be a grey area to it, and there often is.

i identify as asexual for a plethora of reasons. some of the contributing factors are that i am sex repulsed, and that sex repulsion very likely comes from a lot of trauma, as i have become subsequently LESS sex repulsed the more i've addressed the trauma and come to terms with it. in spite of this, i am still very much asexual, because whether that repulsion fades away completely or not, i am still not interested in having sex whatsoever.

Johnny... does not strike me as ace. he strikes me as repressed, and potentially traumatized. again, as you said, 'coward' is not how i'd describe someone who's asexual. it is NOT something one would need to overcome, and if they identify as ace, not something they'd feel the need to. i mean of course there's a lot of things in JTHM that have aged like milk, but i don't think Nny potentially being ace is one of them...

of course we have to address what i mentioned before, asexuality is fickle. there could be a multitude of reasons someone identifies with the orientation. some people are uninterested in sex as a topic and an activity entirely, some people are just repressed and find comfort with the label, even if it's momentarily. at the end of the day, the term asexuality refers to the attraction system, quote: characterized by experiencing little to no sexual attraction to others. which i can guarantee you a LOT of people who use the label don't even feel that way, exact and precise. it's EXTREMELY nuanced for any person who uses it.

but Johnny isn't a person. he's a character. a character with very little information surrounding him and how he functions, and a character that the creator has released barely even CRUMBS about in terms of that information. as much as i ABSOLUTELY FUCKING LOVE ANALYZING THE HELL OUT OF FICTIONAL LITTLE GUYS, the fact is that we can only go off of the very sparse, very vague tidbits Jhonen has left us, and everything we've conjured is in no way canon.

So I once had a weird dream that Jhonen revealed Nny's backstory somehow??? but like in an extremely hard to find ~lost media~ creepypasta sorta way. but it revealed a bunch of info of why Nny felt the way he does about a lot of things. Or something.

All I know is that it was pretty fucked up, so here’s some key content warnings that come to mind:

Child neglect, physical abuse, emotional abuse, heavy talk of hallucinations and potential psychosis, over-medication, sexual abuse (it’s both child-related & incestual), self-harm,

and. well. it’s JTHM, of course there’s murder in there................

i literally keep forgetting i'm not an ask blog anymore and that i don't have to worry about ''''accidentally'''' reblogging posts here so i don't have to just Not follow other blogs rhghfghj

like that was just some weirdly rigid rule stuck in my head I HAVEN'T BEEN AN ASK BLOG FOR LIKE 5+ YEARS OR SOMETHING HELP

ah sweet. man-made horrors beyond my comprehension (girl edition)

be the change u wanna see in the world. make fanart of ur own funky lil fan character

whothefuckisdboy -> ironic-really