The Irish Hermit

I dont know. I try to hold to back. I try to be happy. But once one tear falls they all begin to tumble. and i cant stop it at this point until my brain decides its time for sleep

I would care but at the same time i wouldnt if i just fell asleep and didnt wake up.

I dont know how to help myself. I dont know who to talk to. If i let the same people know each time i feel depressed they will just think im seeking attention not that im seeking help. I try to keep myself busy with hang outs and errands for others but when i have nothing to do and im alone i dont.know what to do to help stop it.

Triggers. I can’t pin point what they will be. Twice today I have broken. The water behind my eyes slowly escape. I need to hide. I want someone to know I’m struggling. But I can’t tell anyone. It makes it worse. I feel worse. They feel bad. I can’t have them knowing

Im sorry i complain so much

i hate myself. i let myself get used so much. used.and dont get anything in return or i do my helpful part and the rest of the plan doesnt follow through. im in pain and i just want people to help or not expect me to do things.