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@invidiaesin
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"If you have to ask, then no, I don't respect you!"
"I'm just saying maybe we can confine them to one area of the palace grounds instead of letting them roam freely." She thinks on it for a moment, knowing they should probably be kept away from the areas where visitors come and go most frequently. "Maybe by the koi pond. Less guards and outside visitors, plus I can keep an eye on them when you aren't around."
"Oh, you mean the koi pond you like dunking me in?" They ask, snapping a piece of candy off with their pearly white fangs. Their tone is difficult to understand to anyone outside of Envy's circle - but there is no real malice here. If anything, he's bemoaning the abuse suffered at Lan Fan's hands.
Still, the water would be a good place for them to shed their skin...
"You haven't changed either - still no fun." It's an admittance of compromise, but barely.
"You think 175 is hard to keep track of? Try keeping track after 8000 years"
"Are you saying you're that old?" He doesn't remember Father making anything... pink? Not even really human looking or anything like a chimera. Reminded him a little bit of that floss candy he's seen at fairs in Central.
"Who says geezers don't have a good memory?"
"You're lucky I've been proactive in keeping them safe from the other Imperial guards. We really should find a safer place for them." Lan Fan doesn't seem concerned about how much of the candy they're eating, unbothered by their indulgence.
"Don't be such a spoil-sport." The homuculus huffs a stray strand of green hair from his face. Most of their attention is still taken by the candy - sure, Envy doesn't need to eat, but where's the fun in that?
Not like the others could look down on him now anyway.
"They've been fine so far."

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Don't tell the others but you're my favorite homunculus
He's ABSOLUTELY telling the others!
"Even some humans have good taste! I know - I'm way better than Greed. Lust is pretty, sure, but have you seen me? Because I have. And I'm adorable."
O n O
"Hey Gluttony! You can eat this one!"
O w O ?
"We don't do that here."
She passes the bag over, letting him take however much he wanted, happy to have someone to share treats with again. "I've been tending to your snakes, by the way. You might still check on them, though. I think they miss you."
He takes a few... and then a few more.
"Oh, I can't wait to see how the guards deal with 'em!" They giggle, biting into the sweet treat. "Keeps 'em on their toes!" There is no thanks given - it's Envy's own way of barely implying it.
@invidiaesin
:)
hi, are we going to write angst on our first interaction now?
Look...... I just send this fucker out and they cause problems.......

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Envy, leave him alone. Ed's not gonna be here to save you this time.
"Is that what you think? That he saved me?"
The air shudders with a chill as the scent of ozone permeates the area. Envy's body is hunched so low that his hands nearly touch the ground.
"ALL THE FULLMETAL BRAT DID WAS STOP ME FROM DYING ON MY TERMS!"
"What, did you expect me to? This is my cute form, after all!" Gestures to himself with a sharp smile. "Maybe I'll change it up in a few hundred years, who can say?"
"I meant your personality, but I'm unsurprised you still think 'androgynous palm tree' is the peak of cuteness." Knowing she might piss him off, the guard holds up a rather large bag of candy. "...Want some?"
Why, yes, he was thoroughly pissed off - thanks for asking! Anger crashes like storm clouds in amethyst eyes. But before he has the time to truly retaliate, a bag is shoved in his face. He goes cross-eyed for a moment, smelling the sugar in the sweets.
He schools his look back to something resembling agitation.
"I guess..."
God he's already causing problems. This is why I don't let him run free...
"Of course you'd be happy to see me! I am amazing, after all."
"Well, you haven't changed at all." WHERE. HAVE. YOU. BEEN. "Nice of you to finally show up."
"What, did you expect me to? This is my cute form, after all!" Gestures to himself with a sharp smile. "Maybe I'll change it up in a few hundred years, who can say?"
hopeful look as she feels the presence of someone familiar--
"Of course you'd be happy to see me! I am amazing, after all."

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The flame alchemist liking a response to if he likes candles? Yeah, he's watching you.
Skitters online. He's been freed from brain jail for a bit!