SHINee in the Good Place:
lesson 4 - so what even are SOULMATES?
note: this is my favorite quote from The Good Place! and I use it to illustrate an important point... it really bothers me when people say that the SHINee members aren’t close with each other because of the above quote. first of all, the lyrics to “Our Page” are the most beautiful, honest, and touching lyrics about a group of people that I’ve ever heard. so there’s that.
second of all, we’re not living in a fucking rom-com. relationships, especially long lasting ones, whether they are familiar, platonic, or romantic, are really hard to maintain. like seriously, relationships are FUCKING DIFFICULT. one of my favorite things about SHINee, ever, is that they’ve never been unrealistic when describing their relationships with one another. all five of them have drastically different personalities, some of them fought when they were trainees (minkey), some of them never thought they would be in the same team (onkey), some of them never wanted to be in the same team (minkey again), and at least two of them have said publicly that living together in a dorm - and for several years, all in one room - was hellish (jongkey). as someone who is both extroverted and loves spending time with friends AND is very particular about personal space and alone time, this makes complete sense to me. but they adapted to each other so that they could continue working together, and somewhere along the line they developed a unique relationship that “is hard to put into words.” (as kibum said in his 2020 cosmopolitan interview)
sometimes, kpop feels like a competiton to see which group can say that they are the closest the most. but a real relationship isn’t about the number of times you can gush about being “an inseparable family” in front of a camera. the real work is done behind the scenes, and honestly, fans will never really know exactly what their faves’ relationship is really like. SHINee, the team as we know them, was put together by a company known as SM Entertainment in somewhere around 2007. I can confidently say that I’ve never seen a musical group that made more obvious sense together. on stage, they fill in each other’s gaps flawlessly, as they’ve said and as I felt when watching their concerts live. it’s like onew said in 2018: “we all always had the same goal... we were all at our happiest when we were together on stage.” but it’s pretty clear that their personal relationships weren’t always so magically seamless. and that’s okay!
in 2018, when asked about why SHINee has been able to go on for so long, kibum said: “버텼기 때문에” or “because we endured.” he went on to say that if each of them had done whatever they wanted to at the time, with no concern for the others, they probably wouldn’t have been sitting there together as a ten-year old group. instead, they held back their impulses as best they could and put in the time together. they adjusted to each other and tried to understand and accept each other’s differences. it reminded me of what Michelle Obama said in her autobiography, Becoming, about how her marriage to Barack Obama (yes, the most famous shawol in the world) never wavered in the face of immense public and private pressures: “You find ways to adapt. If you’re in it forever, there’s really no choice.” now that’s a really fucking realistic look at lifelong relationships.
in the end, for whatever reason, SHINee decided they were in it for the long haul. and then they adapted. they made it work. they’ve made wonderful music and awe-inspiring performances together, and their relationship has stood the ultimate test of time. and I happen to think that is so, so beautiful.
oh, and here’s my favorite ot5 picture! idk what that says about me, but enjoy~
💓💖💗💘💕💝💞💝💘💗💖💓💗💞💗💓💘💖
