Last time that I checc'd

Okay so, the subs didn’t work. Weird as shit. I took two full strips and didn’t feel any better. So naturally like a bitch I went back to using. But now, I’m out of dope and I’m not going to spend another penny on it. I’ve got cottons from the last few weeks and I’m rinsing them to stay well. But those will be gone shortly as well. So I’m going to try to use them to “Taper” off but really when they’re gone I’m just gonna try cold turkey. Fuck it. I’m not using THAT much maybe .2 a day. So I just gotta man up and get through the uncomfortable feeling for a few days and move on with my life. Ok to bigger and better things. Its time to really start being the man I’m supposed to be. I’ve been half assing it and my girls don’t deserve that. So they’re gonna get my full potential. I don’t regret the relapse, because a lot of great life decisions were made while using; Starting my own business, buying junk cars fixing and selling them, and a few others. But now, I am tired of it. And I know my wife is. So, it’s time for me to move on. I’m done with you. You’ve stuck around too long and I can’t keep letting you back in.. its here on the internet, so I may as well stick to this. Even though none of you know me and can’t hardly hold me accountable, I know me. I can hold me accountable, and I know my wife will see this post and help me to do the same. She’s is an amazing woman and definitely deserves me at my best. And that’s what her and our little girl are going to get. 😃

Have you guys met my wife? She’s definitely better than YOUR wife. And she's probably the greatest person in the universe. AND. She’s all mine and I don’t have to share her with nobody else in the world so 😝

On everything. All I ask for in a relationship, is Honesty and loyalty. So if you’re not feeling me no more say that. We can go seperate directions. If you’re talking to other dudes l, DONT HIDE THAT SHIT!! Just tell me. Don’t tell me it’s the fucking neighbor after you LOOK AT HIS NAME AND PICTURE POP UP on the screen! Then when I see that it’s joy and ask to see what you’re talking about don’t ask me to just trust you and don’t look. Don’t “Pinky Promise” me that nothings going on, that you weren’t even talking to him and you don’t know why he was calling, and then come to find out you were talking to him ALL DAY!!! And what’s crazy is there were previous conversations in the inbox last week dating back a few years and THOSE ARE GONE... All I want is for you to be 💯 with me all the way. Don’t never lie. This all started with me finding out about Donovan... and it was lies and lies and FINALLY I got partial truth.. Thrn it was lies from both sides. I was so angry with you, I wanted to leave you. I wanted to hate you. I wanted to tell EVERYONE what you did to me.. But, I’m so fucking deep in love with you yhat I didn’t, I’ve done my best to make this work. And now that I’m actually ready to give my all. 1000% of my heart, mind, body and SOUL to you. You want to start talking to exes about marriage AFTER you date and flirting and the whole time you were doing this.... I was literally SCREAMING in pain in the bathroom. Hurting so badly that I couldn’t even see straight. And you only checked on me AFTER I called you because I needed something... I love you, Baby girl. But, this isn’t gonna fly. This end’s NOW. Either that. Or we do... and I don’t want that, I want to save for an ring and propose to you and Marry you. Buy a house, have another kid. Grow old sitting on our front porch talking shit about the fat people who think spandex is acceptable to wear when they’re jogging LMAO! I am in love with you. Deeply. Always and Forever. I’m yours baby. Until you give me another reason to believe that you don’t want me to be.... please don’t do this. If you can’t stop doing these little things, talking to exes, lying about it, hiding messages, then checking my phone after you get done hiding shit in your phone and taking EVERY LITTLE THING out of context and causing a fight telling me I’m doing something when I’m not... Babe then this is going to have to end.. as sad and depressing and MISERABLE as it’s already making me. That’s how it will have to be. And I’m not saying I have no fault in this. But I am going to do my part. Can you do yours? I surely hope so, Love... next ......... -Always Yours- 👑Christopher B. McNeill🤴🏼