Inspired Streams

The best moments of our lives are the ones we share with someone we love. The beautiful happy memories, the wonderful time spent with each other, and all of that can be so exciting. But then, so much togetherness could ruin everything.Is it Okay to need some space from your significant other?As Bustle.com points out:“Even in the most madly in love couples need space sometimes. Alone time gives us the opportunity to focus on ourselves as well as explore our other interests, our relationship with our friends and family and room to grow.”  What are the Benefits of Needing Space in a Relationship?

Needing space (emotional and physical) is completely healthy in a relationship as it refreshes, strengthens and fosters love and a sense of independence. We’ve seen some couples who miss their freedom as their significant spouse wants to know what she’s doing every minute. That could be toxic to a relationship.“Not only is it okay to need some space, it is necessary for our psychological wellbeing; it is one thing to be madly in love with your spouse, however, it is necessary for women to maintain their own independence, have their own interest and have their own time in a marriage”, says Diann Valentine.According to Jillian Michaels, "Yes, there is such a thing as the opposite attracts; being too similar, mashed and living for each other." However, she thinks it’s dysfunctional and could cause problems. She believes there’s a balance and the balance is two parallel separate lives, but moving in parallel direction.

All relationships are unique, and we all come together for different reasons. The sharing of a common goal or interest for exactly what you want in the relationship and where you desire it to go is what determines a "Healthy Relationship". Healthy relationships don’t happen overnight. They take commitment, compromise, forgiveness, and most of all — a joint effort. Forms of Relationships ldoceonline.com online dictionary identifies the forms of relationships: Love-Hate Relationship (someone both liking and disliking someone else at the same time) Special Relationship (could be also referred to as a close relationship) Supportive Relationship Working Relationship (a relationship common among people who work together) Family Relationship Personal Relationship Human Relationship Social Relationship Business/Professional Relationship Doctor-Patient/Parent-Child/Teacher-Student Relationship Healthy relationships do not necessarily mean a “perfect” relationship, same way nothing or no one is 100% efficient. Healthy relationships find expressions in healthy Communication, Love for one's self/partner, and trust. “A meaningful life is not being rich, being popular, being highly educated, or being perfect. It is about being real, being humble, being able to share ourselves and touch our lives of others. It is only then that we could have a full, happy, and contented life.”

Basically, as we go about our everyday business and social activities, we'll surely come across lots of people. As we connect with people around us: in the bus, market, subway, train station, school, etc., there are four (4) levels of relationships that we build: the Acquaintance (Friends) Relationship, Casual Relationship, Closed Relationship, and Intimate Relationship. Stage 1: Acquaintance Relationship

Is there a difference between an Acquaintance and Friend? According to Socialpronow.com, "the difference between friends and acquaintances is your 'Self-Presentation'. Self-presentation represents behaviors used in establishing an identity with others; such behaviors may differ across various interpersonal relationships." It went further you say that, "self-presentation is the side of yourself you choose to reveal to a person, or how much of yourself you choose to share with somebody. What you choose to share about yourself, and the ways you choose to share it will be different from an acquaintance than with a true friend." An Acquaintance is a knowledge of a person acquired by a relationship less intimate than friendship (Wordnik.com) The Acquaintance Stage is where all other relationships start. At this stage, we meet people that we don't know and relate with them at a surface "Hello", "Hi" level. We bump into this category of people at the bar, party, school-bus, parking lots, taxi, and we virtually have no control over who we meet. We meet them not by choice but by chance. Acquaintances could be people you’ve known for a while, e.g. a Cab driver, a Clerk, a Librarian, a friend of your friend, or someone you regularly meet at a social event but you've never had anything to do with. It isn’t necessarily the amount of time you’ve known a person that makes them an acquaintance. Stage 2: Casual Relationship

On like the Acquaintance level where we happen to bump into each other by chance, say 'Hello" on a surface level but don’t make plans to hang out in the future. In a Casual Relationship, you may want to make some plans to see each other instead of just seeing each other in passing. Though in a Casual relationship, your hang-outs may be periodic, and probably the interest may be about the type of event that brought you guys together. For example: Someone you seldom eat lunch together with your colleague at the office, or someone you meet at the football fields and play together, etc. Generally, there is always a common interest in a casual relationship and that's what brings both parties together. According to verywellmind.com, Casual relationships are more complex than most people think. There are different levels of personal and social engagement, as well as different pathways towards longer-term relationships. Stage 3. Closed Relationship

By reason of the closeness experienced from hangouts and shared interest at the Casual Relationship Stage, a deeper level of interaction between two individuals builds up, as they begin to pay closer attention to both behaviors and what goes on in each other's minds (emotions). According to closerelationships.com, "most relationships psychologists define a close relationship as one in which people have the following distinctive experiences: They know each other well. They care about each other. They depend on each other. They share their lives, thinking of themselves as “us”. They trust each other to be honest and fair. They maintain a commitment to each other. In a closed relationship, there's a little level of intimacy. The word "intimacy" here is not to mean sex, but refers to a close level of communication (candid talk), meaningful shared silences, mutually enjoyed activities, comfortably discussing things, sharing secrets, celebrating events (birthdays) and being there for each other. Stage 4: Intimate Relationship

Personal Effectiveness is the ability to make the most out of all the personal resources (our talent, energy and time) at your disposal to achieve your work and life goals. It’s a daily skill we must apply as we set out to accomplish our respective goals in life. In the workplace, personal effectiveness is about getting our desired results (wanted and intended) and employing whatever styles necessary to get the Job done. Why should you improve your personal effectiveness?? Knowing what you do well, what you can rely on and what qualities you have are essential to maintaining your personal effectiveness. With good planning and effective goal setting, you can ensure a consistent career progression. Management and leadership development can only be achieved by mastering the skills required for effectiveness. What are Skills required in building Personal Effectiveness? People Skill

The first secret of effectiveness is to understand the best way to work effectively with other people. The basic skills required for working with others are Interpersonal Skills and Communication Skills. Interpersonal Skills These are a set of learned skills acquired through knowledge and practice; they are skills required for improving human interactions and working effectively with others. Interpersonal skills enable you to work with others harmoniously and efficiently. It basically made up of four components: Decision Making: Identifying appropriate evidence and weighing up the evidences to make a choice. Team Building: Building collaborations and getting things done through groups. Conflict Managements: Keeping inevitable conflicts from becoming destructive. Crisis Managements: Getting the most of the ever changing environment. Ways to Develop your Interpersonal Skills. Understand, appreciate and respect diverse perspectives and styles Participate and contribute fully as a team member Demonstrate empathy and understanding Build trust and demonstrate trustworthiness Another Skill required for building Interpersonal Skills is: Communication Skills:

According to Indeed.com, “Communication skills are abilities you use when giving and receiving different kinds of information. Some examples include communicating ideas, feelings or what’s happening around you. Communication skills involve listening, speaking, observing and empathizing. It is also helpful to understand the differences in communications via face-to-face interactions, phone conversations and digital communications, like email and social media.” Good Time Managements

Good time management is best achieved by: Identifying what is important to you (priorities) and getting them done Getting the most out of your time Cultivating the habit of effective planning Planning time based on your vision and goals Creating a balance that works for you Using the time management matrix to prioritize (shown above,) Self Awareness/Discovery

To be effective, you must always engage in Self Awareness test by: Checking your Purpose and Values Your values are how we think things ought to be or how people ought to behave in terms of qualities such as fairness, honesty, integrity, openness, service, excellence etc. Having a mental picture of your strengths, weakness, successes and failure. Managing your "Self concept" which influences our goals, temperament and actions and ultimately affects self esteem Seek opportunity for improvement and development Self Management In choosing a behavioral style, learn to be assertive by – expressing your needs and thoughts honestly and directly without violating the right of others Improve in your area of strength and become a proactive person by taking responsibility for life and career. Change your attitude and it will affect your altitude. Learn to concentrate on what you can influence and reduce your circle of concern.

Business Ethics Ethics is how we meet the challenge of doing the right thing when they cost more than we want to pay. Ethics means having a sense of what’s just and fair, in business it includes other virtues like: Responsibility: Capacity to put things in order Accountability: Sense of what needs to be done and what it takes to do it Empathy Courage Balanced priority How do you develop your Business Ethics? Guideline that should govern your ethical decision making must be based on the golden rule: “Do unto others what you want others to do unto you.” In building your business ethics, two things are important: the standard to follow and the will to follow it. What are ways we can increase our Personal Effectiveness? Increase effectiveness through self leadership by realizing that it’s in your best interest to accept responsibility for getting what you need to succeed in the workplace Get rid of assumed constraints that denies you of trying because of your past failure (belief you have based on past experience, that limits your current and future experiences) Know the nature of your strength –your points of power so that you can cultivate them Diagnose yourself (understand your competence and commitment level for the goals you have to achieve) Collaborate with other and all the leaders who can support you (anyone who can give you the support and direction you need to achieve you goal)

Relationships can be quite exciting and thrilling especially at its initial phase - you both learning new things about each other, sharing new surprises and experiences like your first date, first vacation, and so on. At this stage, the relationship hinges on the foundation of discovery, pleasure, and addition which in-turn creates a strong bond with our significant other. But what's the relationship like after a few years? According to thesocialman.com, "...as the relationship progresses, you continue to learn more about this person, and they learn more about you. The discoveries become fewer and farther between. The dopamine rushes dry up. You (or her) start looking elsewhere for these feelings of novelty, neglecting your relationship." Certainly, no two relationships are the same; however, the reason why people leave are oftentimes the same. These reasons hinge on almost all categories of relationships as touching both families, social, and even spiritual relationships. Its no longer news, the high rate of divorces prevalent among couples these days; children are not left out also as we see a lot of children homeless, abandoned, and disowned by their biological parents. We now see employees quitting their jobs, religious members, or followers also withdrawing their commitment & allegiance and most commonly, friends deserting friends. When people leave you for various reasons and move on with their lives, you may oftentimes be bothered and confused especially when it's frequent. Some likely questions that may bug your mind are: Would they have stayed longer if things were done differently? Did I contribute to their leaving? Am I a people person or do I repel people? Was I busy playing the blame game? The fact remains that, none of this incidence happens instantly. It all started out gradually like a drizzling rain that gets built up over time. Those little things you saw as "insignificant" has somehow accumulated to cause this great gorge that has led to irreconcilable differences. There are many factors as to why relationships might not last too long but below is just a few major reasons why relationships break up.

Lack of Trust

Trust is one major ingredient that binds relationships. Once it's missing there's bound to be hitches. When you begin to question your partner's fidelity or sincerity, just know that the relationship is already on that verge of collapse. Build trust in your relationships especially with your spouse and clients. Don't leave any loopholes that may warrant suspicion and distrust.

Boredom

When the activities in the relationship are somewhat stereotypical and no flavours are added to spice up the relationship, one tends to become bored with repeated activities, and sooner than later, gets fed up. It's Okay at some point in a relationship to ask yourself some questions like: What are those things you did when you were wooing your partner or while courting? What happened to all the initial spark? Your partner may be leaving due to boredom; therefore be Dynamic. Eat out often with your significant other, have nice picnics together with your family, go for vacations and dates even as couples, and take quality time to spoil your partner with some expensive treats at intervals. Being unpredictable in the relationship helps to revive that spark once again. Lack of Communication Communication is the life-wire of any good relationship as a lack of it could result in loads of problems and misunderstandings which if not worked upon, could make the relationship with your significant other much harder to deal with. Simple things we do in a relationship like acknowledging and apologizing for our shortcomings can put us on the right path to better communication with our partners.

Unhealthy Habits

You must be aware by now that a toxic environment is repulsive. When the environment is choked up with toxicity, the relationship becomes uninspiring and apathetic. Unhealthy cultures can be inconducive for your optimistic significant other who is undoubtedly sure to take a bow and flee for emotional safety. Nobody appreciates a toxic relationship, so watch keenly as it could be that one partner is making the relationship unhealthy for the other through acts like constant nagging, insecurity issues, selfishness, and such likes.

Negativity

Studies show that it takes three (3) positive expressions to cancel one (1) negative expression. No relationship will thrive in a negative atmosphere. Do you always capitalize on the wrongs and rarely notice or appreciate the rights? Even when correcting the wrongs, do you do so in love or you are so full of negativity and condemnation? Are you a difficult person? It could be the major reason why people often walk away. Strive to be more positive, change your approach, and see the outcome.

Lack of Appreciation

Getting married is a big decision in everyone’s life. Right from deciding on Mr or Ms Right to how to propose and the size of the diamond on the ring, everything matters. But what happens when you buy your own house and want to decorate it? Do you buy furniture and paint the walls keeping only your tastes in mind? Or Do you decide with your better half? The choice is obvious but not easy. All choices need to be made mutually. From the kind of curtains you use to the furniture in the sitting room and most importantly the colour of your walls.

Do put in mind that, just because you want to make your better half happy you don’t have to agree with their choice. You can have an opinion of your own. The idea is to come to a mutual understanding or agreement. Maintain your identity in the house too. Most men would not like pink walls in their living room nor would many women want grey walls in the bedroom. The best way to come to a decision is to discuss and then agree. Here’s a very interesting site www.letscolour.in, which had a real life example of how couples can make decisions faster. The site offers a real life example on how this couple who were recently married decided on various furniture and styles for their home. Here are a few tips to put in mind for the transition as offered by the site when decorating your home as a couple. 1. Compromise: Just as everyone has favourites (colours, dishes, clothing styles, etc), as couples, you will both have likes and dislikes. Meet this variation shouldn't bring disagreement in making choices. You both must make a compromise. Meet somewhere in the middle and agree on. 2. Throw it out

The truth is, at compromise, there may be things (personal favourites) that you both as couple must be willing to let go. You don’t really need that old desk from university or keep that old beautiful mattress from your single hood. Be willing to let some things go – even if they have sentimental value. 3. Make a shopping date

If you work together and decorate as a team, you can’t blame each other if something doesn’t work out or anything later go wrong. Learn to do things and agree on everything. It brings unity, love, respect and a sense of harmony and togetherness in the home. 4. Choose colours together

Capital is the money or wealth needed to produce goods and services. It is also known as money. All businesses must have capital in order to purchase assets and maintain their operation. Capital for entrepreneurs will be discussed in four (4) aspects which I call the FSIM. F: stands for Financial Capital S: stands for Spiritual Capital I: stands for Intellectual Capital M: stands for Material Capital. Financial Capital

This is the form of capital we hear about all the time, Sometimes people start off with a lot of money. They may have a lot of money and decent ideas but since they have the money there isn't a high level of urgency, they will start bit by bit because all they need is made available at their very disposal. Spiritual Capital. Some persons will be like what is spiritual capital? I haven't heard about it before, what could it be? Spiritual capital is a faith-based kind of capital. There are a lot of products that are tied to a certain faith, to a certain religion, and that entrepreneur has an advantage because they know exactly how that faith thinks or how the community can work with that faith and get what they actually want. Material Capital Material capital are things like tools and machinery, it can also be your wealth or assets you have accumulated overtime Intellectual Capital

Relationships exist to provide a symbiotic basis for mutually beneficial cooperation between two people, groups or organizations. There are two forms of networking: Networking through Affinities. Networking through Relationships. Affinity relationships can create opportunity for business networking Why Networking?

Networking is an important winning catalyst. It unlocks doors to good business opportunities through business connections and new contacts. It connects us to economic and political empowerment and helps to develop our knowledge through information sharing and management. Where to Network? Social circles such as clubs, parties, events, games arena, shows, old boys/old girls etc. Professional and business circles such as seminars/workshops for socialized groups, managers, entrepreneurial, teachers, doctors, policy makers, chambers of commerce etc. Political circles: Aligning with political parties, political bigwigs, and technocrats in political power. Religious circles such as churches, mosques, etc. Networking is about being genuine, building trust and relationships, and seeing how you can help others. Below are Six (6) tips to building connections through networking: Preset your goals before going for networking meetings and pick groups/programs to help you achieve the goals Hold volunteering positions in social/economic organizations and stay visible Call those you meet who may benefit from what you do and vice versa; you may get together and share ideas Always have Business Cards with you, and more importantly always get a business card from the person you are talking to. Having their card to follow up with is far more valuable than they having yours. Always wear a name-tag or ID-Card; people never forget names easily. It is a natural conversation starter Don’t prejudge your audience. The person you are talking to might not need your product or service but he will invariably know someone who can. Be very specific when asking for referral.

Life is all about advancements, growth, success, and breakthroughs. No one can predict to what height you can soar until you flap your wings. For every success and strategies, there are secrets; for every provision, there are conditions. The ultimate place of God for mankind is the Topmost Top - a place of distinction and not frustration. Below are thirty-two (32) secrets to get the top which if applied, catapults you to any heights you so envision to attain. 1. Have a Vision or a Dream

"Where there is no vision, the people perish." Merriam Webster Dictionary defines “Vision” to be the ability to see something that you imagine; a picture that you see in your mind. While “Dream” is an idea or vision that is created in your imagination which is unreal. It's a goal that one aspires to meet. Dream has a lot to do with you having a Goal - a direction in life. Every great accomplishment or invention ever created was first conceived in the “mind”. The Mind is very powerful. Shoot for the Moon; even if you miss, you will land in the stars. 2. Be Different!

We don’t make difference until we are different! In fact, You and I don’t see things the way they are; we see things the way we are. We don't have to follow the crowd even when we’re the only one left to decide. Follow your mind! Maintain a life of difference and never permit anything to influence your life choices negatively. 3. Avoid Jealousy "What we don’t celebrate, we will never attract!" Celebrate success in the life of others rather than be jealous; life operates like a "Time Zone". Someone out it this way: Kenya being two hours ahead of Nigeria does not necessarily mean that Nigeria is slow and neither does it mean Kenya is faster either. Someone graduated at 24, yet waited 5 years before securing a Job; and another graduated at the age 29 and secured employment instantly. Another got married and waited 10 years before having a child; but another had a baby within one year of marriage. Guys, It’s all about Time Zone! We don’t have to be jealous over another’s success. 4. Maintain His presence – The God factor.