Hello this is Neil Cicierega aka Lemon Demon

I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"

...OP I thought it meant like a soup ladle. Like a spoonful. I used it similarly. I was a professional editor for fiction presses for years. We are shaking hands about this.

and you may tell yourself: this is not my beautiful circus! and you may tell yourself: these are not my beautiful monkeys!!!

Unpopular opinion: Being intelligent isn’t an excuse for being unkind.

Pretentious asshole is OUT! Pretentious Sweetheart is IN! Wearing dapper clothes and holding the door open for others makes you feel COOL AS H*CK! Glance up from your hefty books to give a stranger a smile!! Quote literature to inspire others! Be presumptuous in the way that you presume that everyone needs their day to be a little brighter!!!

“distinguished yourself by being kind” is my literal life motto at work, holy shit

distinguish yourself by being kind the next 1,114 days

nothing will make me click off a recipe faster than "and the best part: only 250 calories!!!" ONLY 250???? I'M TRYING TO HAVE THE ENERGY TO LIVE. YOU NEED THOUSANDS OF CALORIES PER DAY FOR THE MOST PART. why would I ever in my life make a dinner that doesn't contain enough energy to sustain my whole Being Alive Deal. 600 at the absolute minimum or I close your stupid website

'robin how do you always stay warm in the winter when you don't wear many warm clothes?' I eat a lot of food so that my body has energy to work with! to burn! I'm an endotherm. I produce heat. you do too. you will produce MORE heat if you have more fuel to burn. humans have INCREDIBLE fat storage adaptations. it's built in!!!! why wouldn't I take advantage of that??? I love swimming for hours and cycling in the winter and using my brain a lot and having energy left over at the end of a day. and so I eat food. so that I can do these things and have fun.

among other reasons why terms like "problematic" and "controversial" are functionally useless now is that they are also very often used to describe people whose controversy was like, caring about human rights. "this writer got dropped by their publisher because they're controversial" ok well do you mean controversial as in they sexually abused upwards of 60 young women or controversial as in they said that trans people dont deserve to be hunted in the streets purge-style

one time i was making potato soup and i needed broth for it but i was out of broth. but in my dog food cabinet there was a carton of chicken broth that i had bought for my dog. now the box did say HUMAN GRADE and the ingredients were just bog standard chicken broth. it did say something about joint health for dogs on there. but the ingredients were normal. i even compared the ingredients list to some normal person broth and they were the same. so i did put dog broth in that soup and it did taste completely normal. but i did use the dog broth.

it's crazy how once you notice how literally everything centres men all the time you will never be able to enjoy anything properly ever again

this show is about men this movie is about men this game is meant to be played as a man these characters are men so they're intrinsically more likeable than their bitchy women counterparts this show is about women but they're all for men to look at this movie is about a woman but there's a guy there as well to make it more palatable for General Audience (men) this fandom is all about this one man what do you mean you don't like men. what about this man you must like him!!! he's like a woman to me! and by that i mean i headcanon him as a trans man because im #queeringit and him being a trans man basically means Woman Lite right? so i basically do care about women! and going on e makes you like men and going on t makes you like men and being a lesbian means you still have to have a himbo man friend and you HAVE to read this book! it's about a man

when a child with chronic or terminal illness or a disability/their sibling is well informed about the condition strangers love to say "no child should have to know that 😢" yeah well i think the world would be significantly better if more children knew about that actually. teach your healthy kids about illness teach your abled kids about disability Please !

and people will say this about the stupidest shit of all time. a diabetic child is like "this is my glucose monitor! these are my ketone test strips!" and people are aghast "no baby should have to know about this!!!!" okay so youd rather his mom just poked and tested him and injected insulin and collected his urine without explanation? you genuinely would prefer this child live in fear and ignorance about the daily routines of his life? because like no amount of pouty faces and prayers and condescending instagram comments are going to remove the illness from the child's life so our options are being informed about our bodies or being confused/frightened by them.