DAMSELFLY IN DISTRESS.

independent, semi-selective, low activity multimuse. penned by Cresselia, 22, proship. sideblog to @15-44. formerly 1-83.

but oh my god it is a nightmare trying to get people to even look at this blog and i think people's eyes subconsciously skip over the FOLLOW MY SIDEBLOG on my primary when i follow people :,) at least with primary blogs you can force your way into people's notifs when you follow them LOL and i feel like sideblogs are just... hard to keep track of? take a shot every time i see someone cleaning out their followers list and being like 'teehee sideblogs just message me if i accidentally unfollowed you bc i didn't realize we were moots <3 <3' i do not have it in me to keep of my ever fluctuating followers list!! to make sure bug boy isn't sniped!!!

Yes, yes, he knows -- he's one to talk.

But when he has someone murmur to him that they thought he was a fae the first time they'd stumbled upon him sunning himself, or hears someone lend the idea of vampires or werewolves being real... He views it as, frankly, stupid -- as flattered as he may be at being viewed as a mythical creature renowned for it's beauty, that is!

There is nothing proving the existence of the supernatural. The fact that your mind went to him being a commonly-spoken-of mythical creature that has featured in stories and media for centuries as opposed to a human merged with an extinct species of dragonfly which nobody has ever heard of before... Pssh, completely nonsensical, of course!

Noland himself? Oh, there is plenty of scientific evidence of Noland's existence. For starters, he's right there in front of you, plain as day! He'll happily sit you down and show you the research papers he's done on himself, the slide presentations about different aspects of his insectoid form. Surgical photos of the peculiar organs that have developed inside of his body.

"I can be explained by science," he'll say, completely dismissing any so-called 'quacky' evidence of vampires existing -- he's sure that diagrams of his wing venation prove as more concrete evidence than some old folk tales of some guy from 1805 saying he saw someone who looked a bit scary.

To Noland, anything supernatural is simply someone else misunderstanding something. It's not a werewolf you saw, it was a malnourished bear. It wasn't a ghost that slammed that door in this still room, it was the air currents caused by a subtle draft near the window. That wasn't a vampire hunched over the edge of your bed, that was simply the symptoms of sleep paralysis.

stays up until 4:30 in the morning on a regular basis, while pulling his hair out because he just broke the leg off of an insect he's spent hours preparing to pin

is married to an electric blanket

has no normal hobbies outside of coffee

puts pillbugs he finds outside into his pockets and forgets about them, only to discover them an hour later and decide they'd make a decent snack

won't stop talking about the time he gave himself a tracheotomy with his 'every day carry' pen ( look, he still uses the same pen to this day! )

keeps his uterus in a jar on a shelf beside a limited edition leather-bound printing of The Metamorphosis and a beat-up copy of The Fly

has to specify that when he says 'I'd hit it' about Seth Brundle he's very specifically referring to Brundlefly and not anything pre-telepod

is eager to share his plans to surgically give himself a cute pair of mandibles

has made an offhand comment about how consensual cannibalism is completely ethical before changing the topic and never addressing it

That's not your man.