Hmm, interesting! There could be something to this.
I mean, I feel like I could have done all four at some point, but I relate more to Crowley than I do to Aziraphale. I grew up with two siblings who ended up getting diagnosed with severe mental health conditions. However, they don't do anything to manage them, and my parents weren't good about noticing the issues with them either. I was a kid, so I couldn't know better. Anyway, since it was always my fault when they bullied me, they learned that it's okay to hurt others. They're cool enough to get away with it. So they don't have empathy, and I don't talk to them anymore. I've told others a few of the things they've done, and people look SO SHOCKED AND DISGUSTED. Because this was FAR from normal sibling bullying! Also, I've come to learn that my cPTSD is apparently very obvious to others. I've had other people's service dogs leave them to guard ME. I am not joking when I say that growing up in my family was literal torture. It was all of the abuses!
It doesn't help either that my parents, mostly my mom, seemed to have an agenda against me. Ofc, I got to be autistic on top of putting up with a volatile home life, so I'd get bullied at school as well. And it was very easy for my parents to use every tiny thing that annoyed them about me and say, "This is why people bully you. They're actually trying to defend themselves against you."
I avoid people most of the time as an adult. I will literally spend lots of days alone in a room by myself. And it's not out of fear. I've learned not to fear people a long time ago... but I do just naturally default to disliking others unless I get to know them really well. I've learned to start standing up for myself against my family and have said some nasty things back to them (they cry because I guess they don't like it when you throw the same energy back). Other people who have fucked with me outside of the family have also sometimes gotten theirs. For instance, there was this one girl in college who wouldn't leave me alone and was CLEARLY unstable and dangerous. I ended up doing so much emotional damage to her that she left that college after one semester because I am so fucking DONE with people like that!
I don't just do shit like that with anyone. I only do this if people refuse to respect my boundaries and such. In my household, I had to learn to fight back or live a life of misery. But also, keep to yourself because it's a lot less drama that way. I handled retail like a champ. Nothing the customers said or did could hurt me. I even ended up getting bonuses and promotions. I now work an admin job. As much as I like the sciences, and am starting to get close to having a degree in science, I'm also finding that I like the social sciences as well. I like learning about how people work. And yes, I suppose that's another way I've learned to arm myself.
I've known a lot of people who are like Aziraphale. I guess their families got them to be more polite and have freeze and fawn responses. These people seem to do alright socially... but I wouldn't exactly say they're anyone's priority. I feel like they end up befriending people with questionable morals, or those who simply don't have their shit together. People they probably SHOULDN'T be friends with because they're just getting used! Sometimes, they even end up enabling bad behaviors in others because "They don't want to be mean!" Maybe I just don't understand too well how these extreme people-pleasing behaviors come about because I never had them much personally and got rid of any of those tendencies pretty quickly. Maybe it's because my family was so extreme and uncivilized. But it does get a little annoying to watch a people-pleaser struggle morally over ditching an obviously toxic friend. One who has done terrible things right in front of them. You can explain why so-and-so is no good and how they're just using them, and they still get stuck in a freeze response over it. Well, again, I might be biased because it's not hard to see that bad people exist when your own siblings are so rotten that they sometimes straight up tell you that they like it when horrible things happen to you and that they hope you will die. So, I don't exactly stick around to see the good in others when they've done something despicable. I just instantly stop caring for them without a second thought. It's actually incredibly important to learn to do this, especially when you're dating, because there are a lot of bad actors out there. And a bad marriage can literally ruin your life.
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