cradles the violent fucker in my arms

Luke: So is Ethan the big spoon or the little spoon?

Chris: Don't you ever miss the vivid imagination of childhood?

Ethan: Why does Lord Kronos call you 'babygirl'?

Luke: I've got two more pancakes here!

Alabaster: Remember that time you dared me to lick the swing set?

Luke: Why are you all looking at me like this is my fault?

Silena: I mean why else would she be acting like such a b-i-t-c-h?

Luke, returning to camp after Hermes' mission: Everything's fine. Will and the other Apollo healers said the bleeding was internal.

Luke: I'm going to need a human skull and I can't have you asking questions why.

Ethan: could you guys at least try to see things from my perspective?!

[Playing cards]

Luke: Sorry I was late! I was doing stuff.

Luke: Come on, how many times am I supposed to apologize??

Annabeth: Percy won't wake up. What should I do?

Luke: What did I tell you guys about lying?

Silena: Please bring home purified water with no minerals. You hear me? No minerals added for taste! None!