incorrectptvquotes

matt: uh neither

max: wrong! a kilogram of steel! because steel is heavier than feathers!

matt: they’re both a kilogram though

max: what do you mean?

matt: they weigh the same

max: but… steel is heavier than feathers…

matt: i know but they’re both weighing a kilogram

max: that doesn’t prove anything… steel is heavier than feathers…

matt: i know… but look. they’re both a kilogram so they’re both the same…

dan: they’re the same weight max

chris: so… who broke it? not mad, just wanna know.

everyone:

dan: …i did. i broke it

chris: no, no you didn’t. you’re not that useless. max?

max: don’t look at me! look at matt!

matt: what? i didn’t break it!

max: hmm that’s weird. how’d you know it was even broken?

matt: because i’m standing right in front of it and it’s broken

max: suspicious

matt: how am i?

josh: if it matters, oli was the last one to use it

oli: liar! i don’t even drink that shit

josh: oh really? what were you doing by it then earlier?

oli: i was using the spoons to push back my cuticles jeez franceschi everyone knows i do that

dan: okay let’s not fight. i broke it, i’ll pay for it.

chris: no! who broke it?

everyone:

josh: max’s been quiet

max: REALLY??

*everyone starts arguing*

chris: *turns towards an imaginary camera like he’s on the office* i broke it. i burned my hand so i punched it

chris: i predict that ten minutes from now they’ll be at each other’s throats with knives

chris:

Matt: I can't do math, ask Vegan since he's the smart one

oli: show me that fussy girl

jordan: pardon?

oli: fish pussy