Incorrect Best Friends Quotes

Woolie: I’m sorry, Pat. I guess I don’t know how to be a coward.

Matt: Oh, yeah, sure.

Matt: I would rip the most stanky fart, and when they came to investigate the sound, they’ll die from the fart gas.

Woolie: ...

Matt: No, they say that, but ain’t nobody seen the body since the funeral.

Pat: In other words, you don’t know and you don’t care.

Matt: Yea, and fuck you for asking!

Pat: Fuck you and your entire family!

Matt: I”m good, was a little sick over the weekend.

Pat: Oh, Really? I’m sorry to hear that.

Matt: Yea, ‘Bullets Over Broadway’ was on TV. I came down with a big ol’ Dianne Wiest infection.

Pat: :|

Matt: :l

Pat: :|

Pat: If you don’t come to my party, you will be very, very sorry.

Matt: Is that a threat?

Woolie: I didn’t say anything.

Pat: Yes.

Matt: So there is no other life out there?

Pat: There is.

Pat: They’re alone too.