EMPLOYER: can you perform under pressure?
BOBBY: no, but I can try bohemian rhapsody.
hello vonnie
Cosimo Galluzzi
DEAR READER


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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

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@incorrect-soa-quotes
EMPLOYER: can you perform under pressure?
BOBBY: no, but I can try bohemian rhapsody.

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TARA: Is this alcohol or perfume?
TIG: *chugs down the whole bottle*
TIG:
TIG: it’s perfume.
KOZIK: Ever wonder what's inside a wasps' nest?
PINEY: No, it’s wasps.
KOZIK: I’m going to start a false crime podcast where I explain crimes that never actually happened.
TIG: I’m going to commit all the crimes you explain, forcing you to have a true crime podcast.
HAPPY: You know, contrary to popular belief, decapitation is not that easy.
BOBBY: Huh. You don’t usually hear “popular” and “decapitation” in the same sentence.

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GEMMA: This calls for a very special blend of psychology and extreme violence.
CLAY: If you could change your name to anything, what would you change it to?
JAX: Forty exclamation points in a row and it’s pronounced like a person screaming.
HAPPY: *sighs*
JAX: Are you bored?
HAPPY: Yeah…
JAX: Wanna fuck shit up for no reason?
HAPPY: I thought you’d never ask
CHIBS: Where are the others?
CLAY: They’re playing hide and seek.
CHIBS: Where?
CLAY: I don’t think that’s how it works.
TIG: Why do you think I don’t like you? I do. I would kill for you.
TIG: Ask me to kill for you.
JUICE: ... First of all, calm down-

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TARA: Caffeine no longer keeps me awake while I work, so I have Jax periodically send me texts saying “we need to talk”.
TARA: It gives me the right amount of adrenaline and fear I need to keep going.
HAPPY: I have only punched one person, but the night is still young.
JUICE: Forgive him, he has no manners.
HAPPY: I get by on good looks.
GEMMA: I just ended a 5 year relationship.
BOBBY: Are you ok?
GEMMA: Oh, yeah, it wasn’t mine.
TIG: Why is there a dead person in here?
HAPPY: There was probably a live person in here, and then something happened to make them dead.
BOBBY: Great analysis, Hap.
GEMMA: If I have to clean one more bloodstain from this carpet, I’m going to murder someone.
CLAY: Sounds a little counterproductive.

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TIG: Juice hasn’t stopped staring through the window since the storm started.
TIG:
TIG: I suppose I should let him in.
JAX: I’m open to suggestions, here.
BOBBY: How about a tactical retreat?
JAX: What’s that?
BOBBY: It’s like running away, but manlier.