mickey: ian and i don’t have petnames for each other
debbie, smugly: yeah, okay. what do bees make by the way?
mickey: um, hives? how the fuck am i supposed to know i’m not a bee
ian, screaming from the kitchen: THERES A BEE????????
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@incorrect-shamelesss
mickey: ian and i don’t have petnames for each other
debbie, smugly: yeah, okay. what do bees make by the way?
mickey: um, hives? how the fuck am i supposed to know i’m not a bee
ian, screaming from the kitchen: THERES A BEE????????

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mandy: you cant just use “i’m gay” everytime you make a bad decision
mickey: ...but i’m gay
mickey: [gets pulled over]
mickey: sir, i’m colourblind. i didn’t know it was a red light i swear
officer: ok but you stole this car
mickey:
mickey: officer, im colourblind i didn’t know this wasn’t my car
Mickey: wow, Ian is really good looking.
Mandy: don’t be jealous, you’re good looking too.
Mickey: im being gay, mandy. not jealous.
Ian: fuck you.
Mickey: is that an insult or a to-do list
Ian: what
Mickey: what

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Mandy, zooming into Ian and Mickey at a pool: TWO BROS CHILLIN IN A HOT TUB, FIVE FEET APART CUZ THEYRE NOT G-
[Ian and Mickey kiss]
Mandy: OH
Debbie: wanna see how badass i am?
Carl: not r-
Debbie: [aggresively punches wall]
Carl:
Debbie:
Carl:
Debbie, tearing up: take me to a hospital please
Mickey: fuck me if i’m wrong, but isn’t-
Ian: you’re wrong.
Mickey: what
Mickey: i didn’t even finish m-
Ian: YOURE WRONG. YOU ARE VERY WRONG. WROOONG.
Mandy: mickey, i want you to meet my friend
Mickey: i don’t care
Mandy: he’s really hot
Mickey: still don’t ca-
Ian, walking into the room: hi i’m ian, and you are?
Mickey: SINGLE
Mickey: i mean my name’s mickey
Mickey: but that doesn’t erase the fact that i am indeed single
Mickey: no partner
Mickey:
Mickey: single
Mandy:
Mickey: hey, ian
Ian, not looking up from his phone: yeah?
Mickey: did it hurt when y-
Ian: *makes eye contact with mickey*
Mickey: *gay panic*
Mickey: *forgets his line*
Mickey: D-DAMN BOY ARE U A DAMN BOI BECAYSE DAMN BOY
Ian:
Ian: why am i sexually attracted to idiots

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Frank: wanna hear a joke?
Fiona: no
Frank: just one
Fiona: n-
Frank: knock knock
Fiona: it’s open. you can leave
Frank:
mickey coming out
Mickey: im guy
Mickey: giy
Mickey: goy
Mandy: it’s ok mickey, take your time
Mickey, sighing and pointing atI Ian: boys.
Mickey: you know, i don’t date guys
Ian, smiling: hi, m-
Mickey: i mean, there’s a first time for everything
i just wanna say their height difference makes me w e a k
Ian: fuck, mickey, you’re bleeding bad!
Ian, opening the first aid kit: WHY THE FUCK IS IT FILLED WITH CHEETOS
Mickey, still bleeding: i thought it was funny at the time

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Mickey: *standing outside Ian’s house with a sign that says “Prom?”*
Debbie, leaning out of window: oh my god, yes!
Mickey: no, tell ian
Debbie, yelling: IAN IM GOING TO PROM WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND
Mickey:
Mandy: so are you the little spoon or the big spoon?
Mickey: im a knife
Ian, from the other side of the room: he’s the little spoon