imagine my shock when i found out there are not as many tyland lannister x sharako lohar(/'s wives) fics as i thought. she said "i'm gonna torment that man and put him in a situation" and ain't that the soul of fanfic
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@inastrisveritas
imagine my shock when i found out there are not as many tyland lannister x sharako lohar(/'s wives) fics as i thought. she said "i'm gonna torment that man and put him in a situation" and ain't that the soul of fanfic

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I love how humans have literally not changed throughout history like the graffiti from Pompeii has people from hundreds of years ago writing stuff like “Marcus is gay” “I fucked a girl here” “Julius your mum wishes she was with me” and leonardo da vinci’s assistants drew dicks in their notebooks just for the banter and mozart created a piece called “kiss my ass” so when people wish for ‘today’s generation’ to be like ‘how people used to’ then we’re already there buddy we’ve always been
The Hagia Sophia has inscriptions that were considered sacred for centuries until they were deciphered in the 70s to be Nordic runes saying “Halfdan wrote this”
my old english prof told us that theres a cave in Scandinavia where a viking gratified some runes like 14 feet up on the wall and when they finally reached it all it translated into was “this is very high”
Ancient Shitposting
Now on the History Channel
‘People have literally just always been people’ is genuinely my favorite fact about the world
“Times are bad. Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book.” - Marcus Tullius Cicero, 106 BC - 43 BC
Bertie talks to Jodie McCallum on the opening night of Game of Thrones: The Mad King
i just had a thought. after seeing bertie in this interview (for some reason)
BAELOR SPEAKING HIGH VALYRIAN. seriously. i'd kill KILL for a mere "dracarys" (or "dohaerās", "sovēs", "lykiri"... sigh) but imagine full conversations like those of daemon and rhaenyra. imagine whispers, his little smile after saying something, or a commanding tone 🥴
it would kill me on the spot and i'd love it. screaming crying giggling twirling my hair

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gwayne hightower is the mother that stepped up 😔
House of the Dragon + Reductress Headlines (28/?)
roderick dustin + ser gwayne hightower ↳ house of the dragon 3.08
i'm sorry this is THE funniest thing i've seen all week
I'm Your Man

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"Some men will say I meant to kill my brother. The gods know it is a lie, but I will hear the whispers till the day I die."
Gwayne, after trying reason and threats and begging and yelling to get ser crispy to disband his suicide cult:
My beloved bro… it would suck if we both died here before we got to experiment with our sexualities hey… I guess I just… really hoped you could come visit my house one day… it has a really romantic view… especially from my room… btw ur really handsome…
Meanwhile Alicent, realising halfway through her girlfriend-off with mysaria that she actually NEEDS mysaria on her side:
Wow… I can see why rhaenyra likes you… you’re so cool and pretty… you’re actually kinda a hero of mine… I used to have a white worm poster in my room… I used to make out with it haha how embarrassing… btw what if we were both in love with rhaenyra and we kissed about it…
Hightower siblings in a pinch: ROLL TO SEDUCE
I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever
The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late
For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral
A little bit for Monica, she's my wife
A little bit for Erica, for her strife
My books all go to Rita, cause she reads
My greenhouse goes to Tina, she plants trees
The furniture is Sandra's, on my lawn
Jewelry for Mary, she can pawn
Ashes go to Jessica, that's my plan
A little bit of me inside a can (ah!)
not to be a lannister on main but RHAENYRA'S RULE NEEDS MONEY. why is no one terribly obssessed with money??? (*in a 'will no one think of the children???' voice*)
is there a relevant amount of money on dragosntone? is ALL of the velaryon money gone (not that corlys would be too inclined to lend her, but we gotta wonder)?? since only part of the northern army arrived, can't they send some money? the manderlys are rich.... do other allies have money, other than the arryns? someone else at the vale? (idk girl beg a little lol, 'can you give me money? 🥹👉👈') did the iron bank just leave them on read?? can no one except the iron bank offer a loan?? try to send daemon to steal from/sack oldtown on caraxes since the hightower army is at tumbleton and cole is in the riverlands (not that it should happen, for plot reasons, but y'know it would be reasonable to consider it)??
lots of things could get solved or diminished by throwing money at them, at least short term (which is a thing they desperately need). it won't find vhagar but it could pay the gold cloaks and bribe people 🤷♀️
but in any case that goes to show that dividing the money was a goat move from tyland. being poor does make (/will make) rhaenyra struggle so much more and pushes her to worse options and decisions
alicent asked rhaenyra to run away with her
gwayne invited criston to build a home with him
OTTO HIGHTOWER YOUR CHILDREN ARE GAY AND PATHETIC
i wonder who they got it from.......

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The Iron Throne is the most dangerous seat in the Realm
masterlist
when otto pulls up the viserys card on them