BACK2ME

I get off on thinking of us in a really animalistic way. He’s this alpha, incredibly sexy man, the king of our pride of lions or whatever. 

I’m his queen, his primary. I’m his life partner. 

The others? well here’s what I’ve been thinking as of lately.. Initially I only wanted them to be of the most minor significance in his life, one night stands, casual hook ups, nothing important. but now?

I am comfortable with him having varying levels of emotional attachment to these women and them to him, if, and only if he makes sure I still feel like the queen. 

I need to hear him tell me how important I am to him. How I am his number one. How no matter how hot, sexy, tight, incredible, kind, fun, these women are, he would drop any of them like a hot potato if I so much felt uncomfortable. I want him to remind me that I am the one who owns his heart. I am the one the quietly holds the power.  At the end of the day I’m the girl he brought home to his family. The one that takes care of him and supports him. If it weren’t for me he would not have been able to explore this side of himself. I want him to tell me he’s as in love with me today as he was all those years ago. That living without me is not an option. That he daydreams of our future. That we are going to be together forever. I want him to look me in the eyes and tell me that NO ONE will ever come between us. 

and if he does all that… I’m not too concerned about how many hearts he sends her, or the occasional sleep over. 

Fuckboys will cheat on you and lie to cover their ass and then wonder why you don’t just “take their word for it” anymore and don’t just trust that they’ll do the right thing. I DID trust that you’d do the right thing and look at what you fucking did. You don’t get to go by your word anymore. Make an actual goddamned effort to prove yourself with actions and not empty promises if you want to salvage what you fucking broke in the first place. 

Dude straight up told me “If you think [me cheating again is] even close to happening, then you fucking stop me then and there and you remind me where it lead to.”

Dude wanted ME to stop HIM from cheating on me. 

Literally said if I suspect he’s going to cheat on me again to stop him.

Like that’s MY fucking responsibility.

Up for a late night chat? Let’s talk.

You told me I could always Count on you But I lost count Of how many times You’ve proven that a lie.

The only thing I can rely on With you is that your Actions will prove your words Untrue.

(My spoken word video, my words)

I get off on thinking of us in a really animalistic way. He’s this alpha, incredibly sexy man, the king of our pride of lions or whatever. 

I’m his queen, his primary. I’m his life partner. 

The others? well here’s what I’ve been thinking as of lately.. Initially I only wanted them to be of the most minor significance in his life, one night stands, casual hook ups, nothing important. but now?

I am comfortable with him having varying levels of emotional attachment to these women and them to him, if, and only if he makes sure I still feel like the queen. 

I need to hear him tell me how important I am to him. How I am his number one. How no matter how hot, sexy, tight, incredible, kind, fun, these women are, he would drop any of them like a hot potato if I so much felt uncomfortable. I want him to remind me that I am the one who owns his heart. I am the one the quietly holds the power.  At the end of the day I’m the girl he brought home to his family. The one that takes care of him and supports him. If it weren’t for me he would not have been able to explore this side of himself. I want him to tell me he’s as in love with me today as he was all those years ago. That living without me is not an option. That he daydreams of our future. That we are going to be together forever. I want him to look me in the eyes and tell me that NO ONE will ever come between us. 

and if he does all that… I’m not too concerned about how many hearts he sends her, or the occasional sleep over. 

I get off on thinking of us in a really animalistic way. He’s this alpha, incredibly sexy man, the king of our pride of lions or whatever. 

I’m his queen, his primary. I’m his life partner. 

The others? well here’s what I’ve been thinking as of lately.. Initially I only wanted them to be of the most minor significance in his life, one night stands, casual hook ups, nothing important. but now?

I am comfortable with him having varying levels of emotional attachment to these women and them to him, if, and only if he makes sure I still feel like the queen. 

I need to hear him tell me how important I am to him. How I am his number one. How no matter how hot, sexy, tight, incredible, kind, fun, these women are, he would drop any of them like a hot potato if I so much felt uncomfortable. I want him to remind me that I am the one who owns his heart. I am the one the quietly holds the power.  At the end of the day I’m the girl he brought home to his family. The one that takes care of him and supports him. If it weren’t for me he would not have been able to explore this side of himself. I want him to tell me he’s as in love with me today as he was all those years ago. That living without me is not an option. That he daydreams of our future. That we are going to be together forever. I want him to look me in the eyes and tell me that NO ONE will ever come between us. 

and if he does all that… I’m not too concerned about how many hearts he sends her, or the occasional sleep over.