☆𝕴𝖓𝖋𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖆𝖑 𝕳𝖊𝖗𝖒𝖎𝖙☆

Take this as your reminder to first of all, spend time with your spirits, without expecting anything in return. Heavy on that last part. You don't make and maintain a genuine connection with someone just by showing up to their doorstep every time you need something from them. Treat them as people because they are. Your people. You should care for them as much as they care for you.

Be it ancestors (specifically direct blood lineage or adoptive family, any deceased human relative) or ancestral spirits (in general, that is, all ancestral allies and hereditary connections not just your ancestors). Just make time to hang out. Walk up to their space, a cup of your favorite drink in hand, give them their preferred drink and just chat. Don't ask anything in return. If you have an altar for them, do that. But it can be just going to visit their graves and giving libations and flowers, and telling them how your life's going, sharing memories together, remembrance, or just to listen. It can also be going to the beach or a river, and same thing, pour a drink and talk to them, and listen back. It can be your plant allies, while you're watering them, or putting eggshells or honey or sugar water or other good nutrients and fertilizers on their soil. It can be visiting your ancestors in dreams, and spending time with them there. There's so many ways to do this.

The second level to this is letting them sit in your body too. Listen. Become familiar with how they make you feel. With the signs of their arrival and presence. With the signs they communicate with and what they mean to you. With how they let you know they have a message, or that they're in for a visit. And let them in. Dance to your grandma's favorite beats. Sing your grandpa's favorite songs. Make a family recipe and share a meal with them, enjoy it for them and with them.

Ancestral reverence isn't just the big rituals and they're not the most important aspect of it, it is the everyday coexistence, in your little but constant everyday ways.

Do as you do but also as they did. You're an extension of them and they're an extension of you. They not only walk with you, you carry them within you.

Black History Icon | Black Herman

a white candle, a cup of water and 15 mins is really all you need.

place your white candle and glass of water on your altar. your altar can be anything: the top of a dresser or nightstand, a mantle, a small table, a window sill, anything.

light your candle and call on your ancestors. if you know their names, call them out if you want. or just say “to my ancestors, known and unknown, i welcome you here now. i look forward to getting to know you.”

then take a couple minutes and just listen. you may notice a change in the temperature, or a song stuck in your head. maybe you don’t hear or feel anything at all. that’s okay. it takes time to get to know someone in the physical, so it makes sense that it take some time in the spiritual as well.

spend a couple minutes once a week, talking to and listening for your ancestors. start with 2 minutes, then 5 etc. refresh the water once a week. increase the number of times you’re at your altar slowly. you don’t have to go all out all at once, trust me.

after a while you can start giving different offerings like: coffee, tea, likka, tobacco, dragons blood, food ect. again, don’t go all out all at once.

personally, since i’ve started over, i only give big offerings on first sunday. i make a nice sunday dinner complete with dessert for my ancestors the first sunday of every month. i struggle with my mental health and having low energy and this works for both me and my ancestors. figure out what works for you and yours.

also, remember your ancestors are more understanding than we think. you may think they don’t understand queerness, mental illness, disability etc but i promise you they do. you are not the first and you won’t be the last.