The cops raided my house last Thursday, SWAT team and all. My poor sister vorkvold was at home watching my house and dogs while I went to visit Eyfi in prison. He's been moved to another prison which he doesn't like very much, but he's doing ok.
Last week was so stressful I cant even begin to tell you guys. So it begins with my "friend" losing 150g of MY shit, thanks to a very heavy snowstorm on this piece of shit island which totally lives up to it's name. The next day, I have a meeting with someone who's going to help me get over the sexual and mental abuse I've had to go through and who do I meet on my way there? The guy who molested me when I was 11 years old. Honestly, I was so nervous to go to the meeting I didn't really know what to do so I just kept walking without looking at him. I'd always imagined I'd shout at him or kick him in the balls or just ANYTHING, but I'm too fucking scared to do anything. (as always) When I get to the meeting I just totally break down and cry and I don't even know why, I'm just nervous I guess, but I'm always nervous... So after a really painful hour of telling a complete stranger all the disgusting and revolting things that I've done and have been done to me, all I can think about is my bathtub, candles and my new john green box set. After that I visit Eyfi in prison and I just cry for two whole hours, and he just hugs me and holds me really tight the whole time. I'm so in love with this guy. Now I think this horrid day is finally coming to an end and I jump on the next bus home, waiting 2 hours for it in all kinds of weathers. I'm talking wind, snow, rain, more wind, a little hail and ofcourse a meter of snow on the ground. As I'm walking home in the blistering fucking cold, freezing my tits off, thinking about the hot bath I'll be taking in 10 minutes, the whole fucking police force is at my door, waiting to greet me, and not only them but the SWAT team as well (shields and all). They arrest me and my sister, and hold us in these obnoxiously light-green cells until 4:30 in the morning, at which point I've given up on the idea of taking a relaxing bath, or reading, or lighting candles... I guess it would be more accurate to say that I had given up on the idea of EVERYTHING
wellllllllll, I'm fucking exhausted after writing this down, so I'm going to watch modern family while I wait for that stupid lawyer to call (I think there's something severely wrong with him) I'll write down the rest if I feel up to it (which I probably wont though haha)
bye
