bulletproof

Oh yeah, of course. I’m fine. I mean…I know it’s not actual gunshots or explosions, so. I’m alright. Loud noises just don’t agree with me particularly well anymore. I’m alright though.

...we don’t have to do them.

Yeah, it’s like…some of them sound like gunshots. But the really big ones sound like explosions. They’re prettier than explosions though.

...oh. Is  it...okay?

They’re very…loud.

...yeah? I guess they’d have to be for me to feel them so much.

I think – hmph – everyone knows it’s happening.

....yeah, that’s the best part.

Ugh, I hate them.

Whaat? Nooo. I love them. I can like. I know it’s happening.

Oh please. Please. I cater to him so often. I just don’t give him people food like some people, because it’s bad for him.

If it was bad, we wouldn’t eat it, Mel.

Babe. Look at him laying there. I’m counting like three rolls.

You’re so mean to the poor pup.

He’s like twenty pounds heavier. He is a tubbo.

Oh, c’mon he is not. That’s a huge exaggeration.

All the time. Quite literally. All the time. He’s getting fat, babe.

Oh, he is not, he’s just fine. He looks handsome.

Mmkay. Don’t feed any to Max, please.

Oh, please. When would I ever?

Hah. Talk shit get hit, Allison. You want chicken or a burger?

Uhh, chicken sounds good I think?

Allison’s being annoying, just tell her I’m clearly the better cook here.

Oh, totally the best. Can confirm.

Will you not back me up here?

Hm?

I know how to operate my own grill, thank you.

...

What kind do you want? I’ll get us one.

—-

No, I’m not doing it just to be a bitch. I don’t know though, maybe that’s part of it. I just…don’t feel the need to reconcile is all. You were there. You know why. I love you. I’m sorry I’m the worst. 

Um, whatever is left of my local brewed stuff is fine.

---

I...no, of course. I know. And I get it. If you’re comfortable with this decision, you know I’ll support it. I love you too. A lot.

I’ve already made it. They don’t deserve anything from me. They never did.

—-

That’s not…what I’m doing. Or maybe it is a little bit, I don’t know. But no, it’s not just an eye for an eye thing. It’s me not thinking it’s going to do fuck all. It’s me not owing her anything at all ever again. She was terrible, she doesn’t deserve anything for me. I’m not doing it to hurt her…I don’t think. I’m doing it because I don’t have anything to say, or anything to forgive her for. I’m never going to forgive her, so why bother? Maybe that makes me a bad person. 

I would have to agree with you there. So I guess we should...just not worry about it and like have a beer or something.

---

No, no that...that doesn’t make you a bad person. You’re not a bad person. It - as long as you’re not doing it for the wrong reasons, I think...I think maybe you’re right, then. I just want to be sure. This is a big thing and...I just...wanted to be sure we talked it all through.

Shouldn’t it though? It shouldn’t make the decision for me, but it’s got to…factor in.

—-

I just – why though? She never did anything for me. She made me awful for a really long time, and then when I got less awful she disowned me like she did Mel. Thankfully I was out of the house at the time, living with Hope and Hope got me through college, but fuck. Maybe she should feel some of the fucking bullshit we did.

...I guess, but it’s still your choice. 

--

I just...I don’t think that...the whole ‘eye for an eye’ thing ever ends up feeling good, you know? She was terrible, I get that, but...leaving it with you trying to make her feel the way she made you feel I just...I don’t know. Maybe I’m wrong, but it...it’s not something I necessarily think ends up feeling as good as you think it will.