@illegally-tired - Tumblr Blog

lol my new coworker/co-counsel was in court with me in my *usual* county and court was so horrible that she her first words getting in the car to leave were “let’s get the fuck out of here”

she gets it

#the horrors #public defense #real lawblr #*usual = the county Kyle is in

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illegally-tired

have you ever driven 4.5 hours one way to argue a motion to suppress only to be told the clerks never accepted the filing so, even though the state has been on notice for over a week, you just… drive back?

because I have 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

cattorneyatlaw

illegally-tired

at least my girlfriend didn’t turn into the moon I guess

illegally-tired

UPDATE ON THIS

THESE CLERKS ARE UNDER INVESTIGATION BECAUSE THEY WERE INTENTIONALLY NOT SUMMONSING (Summoning? Idk) JURORS WHO COULD BE FAVORABLE TO THE DEFENSE

I knew those fuckers were crooked. Lock em up

I’m back in an office and the chronic illness is chronic-illing 😔

#chronic illness #my neck my back

illegally-tired

Do people actually still follow me

If you do and you’re an attorney, tell me the dumbest thing you had to argue. I’ll go first:

That defense witnesses are meant to contradict the state’s evidence

flawschool

That a witness is likely to be biased against someone he owes a million* dollars.

*amount somehow not exaggerated for comedic effect

msvelawciraptor

As a public defender, there are just so many options. But for this, I'll go with the classic "not my pants" defense for possession of a controlled substance. Everyone hears that one from a client or a colleague talking about a client at some point.

Runner up is the Costco shopper defense to trafficking: I know that seems like a lot of meth/weed/whatever, but they were just stocking up for personal use. Bonus points during COVID lockdowns for arguing they were being responsible in their use by minimizing how often they were having contact with others to feed their habit.

illegally-tired

LOL I’ve had all three!!

I guess my prompt was kinda vague - the dumb thing I had to argue was dumb bc it should be common fucking sense… These are just dumb™

Do people actually still follow me

If you do and you’re an attorney, tell me the dumbest thing you had to argue. I’ll go first:

That defense witnesses are meant to contradict the state’s evidence

#public defense #real lawblr

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judge almost revoked my client’s bond today because he couldn’t get to court after the hurricane flooded his city yesterday

this is why I’m tired!!

#key word almost #I was like judge are you fuckin serious lol #jk I didn’t say that #public defense #real lawblr

illegally-tired

lol I was so tired and really didn’t want to see this client today but I f’ed up and told his gf I was on my way to the jail he was in. when I got there it was after 5, shift change, and dinner so I kindaaaa asked them to “turn me away”

still have to go back tomorrow but man I did not have the energy for this dude today

illegally-tired

turns out he dug a big hole and dragged me down into it by giving me a serious ethical dilemma! thanks client

#I’m gonna get chewed tf out lol #real lawblr

lol I was so tired and really didn’t want to see this client today but I f’ed up and told his gf I was on my way to the jail he was in. when I got there it was after 5, shift change, and dinner so I kindaaaa asked them to “turn me away”

still have to go back tomorrow but man I did not have the energy for this dude today

I think y’all will be so happy to know that kyle—yes, that kyle—has been voted out of office AND replaced by a personal friend of mine

it’s been a long time coming

#real lawblr #public defense #fuck kyle

illegally-tired

have you ever driven 4.5 hours one way to argue a motion to suppress only to be told the clerks never accepted the filing so, even though the state has been on notice for over a week, you just… drive back?

because I have 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

cattorneyatlaw

illegally-tired

at least my girlfriend didn’t turn into the moon I guess

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have you ever driven 4.5 hours one way to argue a motion to suppress only to be told the clerks never accepted the filing so, even though the state has been on notice for over a week, you just… drive back?

because I have 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

#real lawblr #public defense #also client is in custody #I made a bit of a fuss I won’t lie #but not so much that the clerks didn’t do me/another client a solid favor later on #but GOD GET IT TOGETHER

🗣️ I love my clients!!!!!!

you know what I truly think has helped me so much as a PD?

being fucking annoying. with no shame.

I’ll bug the shit out of someone until I get an answer. I’ll ask question after question after question of a judge, prosecutor, client, whatever until I understand or they tell me to f off.

idk if it’s being a little sister or just a relentless advocate for my clients but it has gotten me a lot in this job

#I should add that I’m annoying but nice as fuck so no one can really be mad at me for too long #it works for me #public defense #real lawblr #pro tips

inloveforevr-deactivated2025041

Self improvement is great but ultimately? you have to accept your self. Yes you can eat better, exercise more, read more, set boundaries, love your self, but it all comes down to this. Some days you won’t have the energy to do any of these things. And you’ll look in the mirror and think that this is not enough. That’s a lie. The biggest love for self is to live slowly. To rest. To really rest. Have a nap. Eat what makes you feel good. Read if you want to. Embrace yourself and accept that you cannot and will not be ever be perfect. Accept that you are good enough. You don’t need to keep busy all the time. you don’t need to go out all the time and post on instagram. You don’t need to journal if you don’t want to. You don’t need to make art if you don’t want to. Breathe, give yourself grace and compassion. Give yourself the love and tenderness you so badly need. Be gentle with yourself. You are trying and it is good enough. You are good enough.

inloveforevr-deactivated2025041

A beautiful poem that illustrates my point

#reading this as I’m in bed at 11am on thursday #thank you OP

sodom-hussein

Happy tax season to my US followers

illegally-tired

I love this because when I say “everyone has broken the law” I mean if you haven’t broken any other law, you’ve definitely lied to the IRS, even if accidentally

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illegally-tired

Absolutely nothing like calling a shithead officer a liar in open court

illegally-tired

Was it karma or just a stupid coincidence that my wife and I got stopped today 😂😂

Absolutely nothing like calling a shithead officer a liar in open court

#real lawblr #public defense #fun MTS today #judge took it under advisement #🤞🏼

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