she/they | over 18 | I like Star Wars, transformers, my hero academia, red dead redemption, and Project Hail Mary | wolf nerd | biology major.
Racists/homophobes/transphobes/zionists/proshippers/ etc DNI. Amputee fetishists DNI.
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please please please please please PLEASE tell me you still write for giulio!! IF YOU STILL DO, I HAVE A REQUEST!!!!!! you mentioned dry humping in one of your headcanons for him...... elaborate PLEASE i BEG of you!! i finally got back into my hyperfixation over him after finding figures of him out in the wild (i spent so long just staring at listings for them online when i first watched the movie, so seeing them irl really shocked me lmao).
UGH SO REAL I would spend outrageous amounts of money on him if I could... i jusut ordered a new one the other day actually YIPEEEE
GIULIO GANDINI X READER HEADCANONS
18+ below the cut!!
I'd love to expand on this. wanna know why? because I love dry humping unfortunately (not unfortunately)
As I mentioned in the same hcs he's the type to adore his partner's body wholeheartedly and deeply. so while he's EXCELLENT at keeping a straight face, if you know what to look for, you could eventually figure out that he constantlyand I mean constantly wants you.
again, though, he has a great straight face and rarely acts on selfish desires unless he deems it "proper" so to the untrained eye he is not a horndog.
he is.
dry humping/rutting is something that he unfortunately deems improper. but that doesn't mean he can't love it. the fact that it's improper but he does it anyway is half the fun, to him.
therefore it wouldn't be super common. unless, perhaps, you tell him you like it. then he might be open to doing it more
you'd probably find out he's into that by doing something completely normal and common: looking good. maybe you just got back from a fancy dinner and you're still all dressed up and you were teasing him the whole time, or maybe you're just relaxing in bed in some cute (but slightly scandalous) pj's.
He'd ask to kiss you (does it every time because that's proper and polite), and he's riled up AF so it's probably going to get heated a little. before long he's rutting against you like a dog in heat. ask him if he wants to stop and actually fuck and his immediate response will be a dozed mumble of "no" because why would he ever want to stop this?
eventually he'll finish and the post-nut clarity will hit him like a truck and he'll scurry to the bathroom, embarrassed, to clean himself up. when he comes back he'll still be all embarrassed about it. if you really, really liked it because you're a sick fucking freak like myself, that's the perfect time to tell him
he'll act casual about it and give a sort of neutral "your desires are my command, darling" but inside he'll be delighted that you're on board with his freaky ass kinks
his ideal target for dry humping is your thighs or to just basically thrust right into you with clothes on. he wants that cookie so effing bad (the cookie = literally just being able to grind on you like a fuckin teenager at prom or something idk i've never been to a prom leave me alone)
if you hypothetically wanted to rut on his thigh (please please please please PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE) it would take every ounce of his strength to not just fucking come on the spot that's so hot to him and he has no idea why
(something something he was never desired before and spent most of his life deemed undesirable for a myriad of reasons so desire so strong you don't even need to undress him to experience overwhelming lust touches both his soul and his dick or whatever)
idk if i said anything about degradation before, but it's one thing that he thought he wouldn't like and refuses to say he likes because it's improper, but calling him a filthy dog for rutting on your leg will DO SOMETHING to him. but you gotta be especially careful with that kind of thing due to his past (according to my hcs) (he's practically my oc at this point holy fuck)
but that's not to say praising him while he's humping your thigh won't get him off. no, it's just as effective if not moreso... praise kink giulio WHERE
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still caring about internet friends you lost touch with years ago is so embarrassing. yeah i had a deam we met up irl recently. the last time we spoke was maybe 7-8 years ago. i still wear the laces we randomly decided was a sign of our friendship. i dont know what any of your socials are or if youre even active on any. sometimes i see someones art resemble yours and i wonder for hours. do you still go by that name you chose? whenever i see it i wonder if its you. we couldve passed each other in this vastness a thousand times and not have a clue.
to be clear since this is making the rounds: she has to be an absolute loser in no way that can be pinned on her gender. no "i'm just a girl tee-hee" stuff. straight up just a loser (nondenominational)
I decided to sit down and concentrate and properly write the list of rules that qualify a character for this role.
FIRST LAW: This character must be a woman.
SECOND LAW: This character must be a loser, but not in a way that can be pinned on her gender. Misogynistic response from the audience does not disqualify the character.
THIRD LAW: If the audience does not enjoy this character, then it becomes impossible to enjoy the show/film/book/game altogether. It is not possible to ignore this character, for better or for worse.
FOURTH LAW: The character must make bad decisions, and not just be a victim of poor circumstances outside of her control. The character can also be a victim of poor circumstances outside of her control, but it has to be primarily her personal choices that deem her a loser.
Sideshow figures newsletter had an article about “10 Awesome TV Dads” and JOHN FUCKING WINCHESTER WAS ON THE LIST because, and I quote, “However, like the other dads on this list, John clearly loves his kids.” … “He even sacrifices himself to save Dean. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.”
You see me peacefully sleeping with a soft smile on my face, looking as if I am the happiest I’ve ever been. “Surely she’s dreaming of something nice like playing with baby animals,” you may think. No, I am dreaming of snapping Sheev Palpatine’s neck.
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Looking at all of the Star Wars books that involve Darth Vader, he must have been that absolute god of scheduling. Like, this is the Dark Side power that Palpatine was talking about. Vader was practically everywhere during the rise of the Empire, according to the books.
Like its body is just inexplicably shaped like a big rock dick. The first time Grace saw them he started crying laughing because there was a giant penis made of stone walking towards him. Only Rocky understands why this is funny.
Grace decided to call him Richard. Richard does not understand why savior Grace laughs at him.
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