In Love With Chan & Lee Know

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Your boyfriend hums, inspecting your outfit.

Y/n: I think if I get this in black, it'd look more fitting.

He scoffs, pulling you in for a kiss.

Changbin: You're crazy for thinking such things, darling. You're beautiful in every color.

You giggle, running back into the dressing room.

Y/n: Thank you, Binnie.

He sits down on the soft chair, waiting for the next dress. He's going to buy everything for you, he just likes when you show off for him.

He hears you whine and perks up when you call his name.

Changbin: Yeah, baby?

Y/n: The zipper's hard to pull up on this dress. Can you help me?

He carefully opens the dressing room door and slips inside.

Changbin: Wow! You look gorgeous.

Y/n: I don't think so. The yellow makes my tummy more noticeable.

He rolls his eyes. It's getting ridiculous how much you're putting yourself down when you rival a goddess' beauty.

Changbin: Stop being so mean to yourself, baby. I love everything about you and more. Do I need to give you a reminder?

You suck in a breath when he starts to kiss the space between your neck and shoulder. His big arms wrap around your body, feeling you up wherever he can touch.

You lean into his chest, head resting against his broad shoulder.

Y/n: What if- Mm- What if we get caught?

Changbin: Don't worry about that, love. Right now, this is all about you and your beautiful body.

He removes the dress, letting it pool around your ankles. He sits on the bench and pulls you to sit on his lap.

Changbin: Never take your eyes off the mirror. I want you to see how gorgeous you can truly get.

He spreads your legs, rubbing your clit through your panties. You hum, his finger drawing circles as a wet patch forms from your arousal.

Changbin: Want to know what I see everytime I look at you? I see a woman that isn't afraid to speak her mind even if people hate her for it.

He pushes the thin fabric to the side, his finger sliding up and down your folds. You bite on your bottom lip, whimpering as quietly as you could.

He shoves a finger inside of you, pumping slowly.

Changbin: When other women tried their hardest to come in between us, you shut them down and staked your claim. You never once let them make you feel inferior.

He adds another finger, increasing his pace.

Changbin: I don't get why whenever you're with me, you repeat those awful things they tell you. Have I ever made you feel that way?

You shake your head. He's done nothing but love and cherish your existence.

Changbin: Then why, my love? Why do you keep saying such mean things about your body? You are the most gorgeous woman I've ever got the pleasure to meet.

Your eyes roll to the back of your head, hand covering your mouth as you clench around his fingers. He doesn't stop until your orgasm hits you hard.

Changbin: Look at yourself, baby. This is when I find you the most beautiful. When you let your guard down and let me take care of you, worship your existence.

He pulls his fingers out and licks your juices clean. You catch your breath, clenching on nothing at the sight.

He pulls his pants down just enough for his cock to spring out. He aligns himself and slides inside slowly, the stretch making you shiver with pleasure.

His hand is still covering your mouth, muffling your quiet moans. He guides your hips up and down, slowly fucking up into your pussy.

Changbin: The look on your face tells me you love it when I talk about your beauty. Need me to reassure you how much I love you? I'll gladly be here to do so.

You steady yourself, bouncing on his cock a little faster. He looks down in between you, loving the way his cock disappears into your swollen cunt.

All for him.

The sound of your ass hitting his pelvis can be heard, but you don't care. You love the way he makes you feel, the way he loves you.

He never fails to remind you of how beautiful you are.

Changbin: So perfect, baby. Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. The only thing that matters is you. My love for you is real and forever will be.

You watch him from the mirror. He's smiling at you fucking yourself on his thick cock. He isn't doing this for his pleasure, but yours.

Y/n: I love you, Seo Changbin.

His smile widens, grabbing your hips amd slamming into you.

Changbin: I love you more, angel.

You both cum at the same time, covering your mouth as your juices run down to his balls.

Changbin: So fucking stunning, baby.

You stay sitting on his cock, legs twitching from the intense orgasm you just had.

Y/n: So... Get the dress?

He laughs, kissing you on the cheek multiple times. He finds you so adorable, even if your face was flushed out from getting fucked by him.

Changbin: I'm buying you everything, love.

He helps you up, dick sliding out. You grab your purse and hand him tissues. He cleans you both up, helping you into your original clothes.

Y/n: Thanks for everything, Binne. I'm sorry for always needing to be reassured.

Changbin: Nothing to apologize for, darling. I love telling you how much I love you. Even if it means I gotta fuck some sense into you with my-

You kiss him to shut him up.

He smiles, pulling you close to him.

Y/n: Let's go home, babe.

Changbin: Good thinking. I hate when you have to hold back your pretty sounds.

Y/n: And who's fault is that? Always fucking me in public.

Changbin: Can't help it. You're perfectly mine and I love appreciating you.

You giggle, feeling giddy from his words.

You know, without a doubt, that this is the man you're going to marry one day.

---

You didn’t really know how to respond when he talked about these things, especially now, too entranced by the way his muscles tensed and started to slowly work up a sweat. Minho wasn’t wearing anything out of the usual, just an everyday shirt he’d cut the sleeves off of and a pair of gym shorts he’d ridden up way too high. At least he was comfortable, although maybe too comfortable so that he didn’t mind showing skin in front of someone who was on the verge of sexual combustion.

His mouth was moving, though you couldn’t process what he was saying. From your spot on his bed, you watched his slightly exposed shoulder muscles tense through the mirror that his back was to, all while he kept his gaze on the weight in his hand. Your mind traveled to how good he’d look with your nails scratching down it, leaving red hot marks that would surely last for days. Maybe it was because you hadn’t gotten laid in so long, or maybe it was because he was so comfortable talking about sex to you that it had implanted such lewd images in your brain. Either way, he looked so delectable.

Wonder if he looks good naked, you thought, trying not to let your eyes linger too long. Though you were too slow. Minho caught you staring, slowly bringing his work out to a halt. Your face began to grow hot as you trailed your eyes from his shoulders down his arms and stopped on his hands, the blood rushing so much that the veins protruded. As you wondered what it’d be like to feel them around your neck, Minho let out a breathy laugh. “If you’re gonna stare, at least compliment me.” Cocky bastard.

“S– sorry,” was all you said, shaking your head and readjusting to lean against the headboard.

“Did you hear anything I said? Or were you too mesmerized by how hot I must look while working out?” Minho set the dumbbell down gently, riding his shorts higher to tuck them into the lower hem of his tight boxers.

“Not really. I kinda tune you out when you start talking about how good in bed whatever-their-name was,” you answered honestly.

To be fair, you did listen to him at first. However it became tiring having to hear of all the action he got when you couldn’t even bring yourself to an orgasm no matter how hard you tried. It was getting painful, how close you could bring yourself to a high just for it to simmer out because it just wasn’t enough. You tried anything you could, different vibrators and all of their different settings, different kinds of porn that could’ve potentially sparked another interest, but nothing worked. The true object of your sexual desires was just so far away. “Oh really? So you drool over me instead? I’m more than a pretty face, y’know.” He was still at the end of the bed standing while you cowered slightly into his sheets, embarrassed.

“I didn’t mean it like that,” you admitted, voice low.

“How long has it been for you?” Minho asked bluntly. It made you snap your eyes open at him, shocked he’d even ask. He’d never really pushed you about your sex life, probably not wanting to make you uncomfortable. But with how you’d been looking at him like a lion to a gazelle, he was in the right to ask such a question. You shifted, tucking your legs in tighter. “A while.”

Minho’s lips piqued ever so slightly, “you like what you see?” He leaned forward onto his hands, crawling slowly up to you. Your breath hitched as he stopped just short of your feet.

“I mean… you’ve worked hard on… yourself… Don’t you want people to look?” The right words had a hard time finding their way into your head and out your mouth. He ran a hand through his already messy hair, adding to the seductiveness of the way he casually leaned on his other arm. Reaching out, he took your phone from your hand and tossed it to the end of the bed. “So you are looking,” he smiled wickedly, lips extra plump. Minho noticed the tension behind your eyes, unsure if you should cross the invisible line that your friendship lies behind. “If it makes you feel better, I‘ve always been looking at you the same way. I’m surprised you haven’t noticed.”

“I’m not sure I know what you mean,” your voice was almost a whisper.

“C’mon, Y/N. I have a key to your house. I’ve heard you. Just ‘cause you can’t hear anything outside the bathroom when you shower doesn’t mean I can’t hear you inside.” It was like your heart stopped beating, realizing what he was referring to. All the times he was sitting in your living room with his hands politely folded in his lap, staring at the TV that hadn’t been turned on with a smile as if he was waiting for something. You always just assumed he was waiting for you to come out. In a way, you suppose he was.

You were sure your whole face was bright pink, forehead starting to sweat thinking about how Minho has heard you moaning his name. “You think about me when you touch yourself, don’t you?”

“Minho, I—“

“I do too. I think about you,” his tone dropped to an octave you’ve never heard from him before. Sitting up, he tugged your bent knees from under you and pulled you down the bed, head laying in the pillows. You don’t know why you let him, because now he hovered over you, breath hot and heavy as his face came in close. “When I’m with those other girls,” you bit your lip unconsciously, watching his eyes flutter between your own and your lips. “I think about you, wishing it was you under me. Sometimes, I have to shut myself up all together to stop from moaning your name.”

Your chest tightened at the mention of him being with other women. Jealousy is unpredictable, it can make people do unpredictable things. But sexual frustration is even more dangerous, bringing out the worst in people to live out some of their most taboo fantasies. Like now, it forced you to speak words you’d never dream of saying out loud. “They’re lucky.” Confusion spread across his face, eyebrows scrunching together as he steadied himself over you. “They had the chance to be beneath you.”

“And never stood a chance against you.”

“How would you know? You’ve never… had me like that.”

“Does it upset you? Me being with other girls?” The confusion was quickly replaced again with another grin. Minho pushed your legs apart with his knees, bringing one of his own to kneel just below your aching core. It was getting stickier with every second that he caged you in, if you weren’t breathing so hard you were sure you could smell your arousal seeping through the thin fabric. You could feel the heat from his bare thigh between your legs, fueling the idea of being able to ride it. 

Hesitating, you nodded, fiddling with the hem of your shirt. Minho let out a dark chuckle, brushing a strand of hair from your face. “You’re so cute. You have no idea what you do to me— what you’ve been doing to me.” It was like he was taunting you, calling your nonexistent bluff. It wasn’t like you were hiding the dirty thoughts you had of him, the opportunity just never arose. Until now. 

“What do I do to you?” you asked, suddenly growing curious and slightly confident. Minho’s eyes darkened as he watched you wiggle, getting antsier with the lack of touch.

“If I tell you, things won’t be the same.” He leaned back on one heel between your legs, the other propped up next to your hip.

“Tell me.” You said almost instantly. It felt like if you wasted another second without his touch, you’d burst from the inside out. A sudden adrenaline boost shot through you, bringing you to sit up and lean towards him. It took everything in you to resist the urge to kiss his lips as he let his tongue gently run over it. “I want you to tell me. Everything.”

A flame flickered behind his eyes, you could see it through the haze of lust. “I think about kissing you,” he slid forward, pushing off his heel to guide you back into the pillows. Minho brushed your hair from your neck, dipping his head to let his lips ever so slightly graze the sensitive skin your pulse lied under. The heat from his breath sent shivers down your spine. “I just wanna kiss you everywhere.” He paused before placing the softest kiss to your throat, another under your jaw, to your cheek, and stopped to hover over your lips, not letting himself get caught in the way he could so easily melt into you.

“Wanna touch you here,” you’d forgotten about his hands. Now they were unlocking your own from your shirt, intertwining and bringing them over your head. Fingers ghosted down your arms, over your shoulders and up until they traced your lips. “Here,” he gently made his way down your chest, grazing the tops of your breast with his mouth as his hands slipped beneath your shirt.

“Min—“ you were going to tell him to hurry up, but he lifted your shirt and brought it over your boobs. It didn’t register that you weren’t wearing a bra until his lips attached around your nipple, sucking harshly and biting at the nub. You let a moan escape, overwhelmed by the sudden stimulation. With a free hand, he tweaked the other nipple, eventually giving the same attention to both.

Removing your shirt all together, he brought his hand down to pull at the hem of your shorts. “And here,” snapping the elastic waistband, the sting instantly subsiding as he cupped your clothed mound. You were sure he could feel the wetness. Another whimper left your lips, closing your eyes and arching into his hand. He wasn’t moving, but the friction from someone other than yourself had you reeling.

“Please,” the plea was a pathetic attempt at more, though more of what you were unsure. Minho had hardly done anything and you were putty in his hands.

“Please what, sweetheart? I told you what I want. It’s your turn now.” Knowing where he stood, wanting you just as bad as you wanted him, you grabbed the hem of his shirt so that he could pull it off. It wasn’t the first time you’d seen him shirtless— if he could, he’d never wear one.

But this was a different environment, a different tension surrounded the two of you now. Before he could completely strip his top, you were already reaching for his pants, bringing it down as much as you could without any awkward movements. He’d beat you to it though, pushing you back down into the bed and stripping himself of both his shorts and underwear. You followed him, but could only get your own shorts off before Minho stole your hands again and pinning them above your head once more. “Tell me you want me.”

“I want you. So, so much.” A grin plastered his face and let go of your arms to use one hand to strip you of the last item of clothing. Minho ran a single finger through your sopping folds, swirling and spreading your juices around to make a mess. Another moan ripped through you, the lack of touch for months finally catching up and making you hyper sensitive. It was just the tip of his finger, toying with your clit lightly as if to antagonize you. It dawned on you that after all that, he still hadn’t kissed you.

“Kiss.”

“Hm? What was that, sweetheart?” He pried his eyes away from your cunt long enough to catch your watery gaze. “Kiss. Please?”

He giggled, watching the way your lips pouted while he took his time to suck on the one finger that was coated in your essence. After letting it go with a pop, he cupped your jaw and finally crashed his lips to yours. It started soft, sensual as he let you set the initial pace. But hunger overtook him, licking along your bottom lip to ask for entrance. The kiss quickly became hungry and messy, spit and tongues traveling anywhere and everywhere. “Always knew you were a good kisser,” Minho breathed heavily, resting his forehead on yours as his hands trailed down your body again.

This time, he spread both of your legs, taking in a deep suck of air as he lifted them up from the underside of your thighs, exposing your core to him. “Smell so fucking good.” Licking his lips again, he dove in, licking and sucking in all the right places. Your nerves were on hyperdrive, fire igniting in your gut even more than it already was.

“F— fuck!” you cried out when his tongue circled your pulsing hole. He dipped the muscle in for a split second before licking back up to your clit, rubbing the tip of his tongue in figure eights. He dropped your thigh over his shoulder, using the free hand to slowly push a single digit into you. This drawed out another whine from you, gripping onto his hair and pulling his face deeper into you. You felt yourself already building up a dam, threatening to break at any second. Minho felt this, pumping the one finger a few times and quickly adding another to spread you wider. He scissored you open, lips suctioning to your clit like it was his lifeline. “More, n— need more.”

He didn’t need to be told twice. He added a third, practically splitting you. Minho curled the three digits, shudders ripped through you like a tidal wave as he hit all the right spots. You were so close, walls fluttering and clenching incredibly hard. He could feel it, pulling back as soon as you were about to tip over the edge. “No! Fuck— why?!”

“Just because you made me wait so goddamn long.” Minho sat back, swiping some of your arousal to use as lubricant while he tugged his angry cock. It was the first time you’d looked at him, really gotten a good look. To say he was well endowed would be short of a compliment, you wondered if he’d be able to fit. 

Your eyes raked up his body, “you’re so mean.” Tears wanted to fall again from the involuntary spasms in your muscles. It was painful, so blissfully torturous. 

“Please, you don’t know how mean I could be.” You didn’t know what he meant by that, figuring you’ll work it out later. “But for now, I’ll be nice. Tell me what you want. Make it good, I won’t go so easy on you next time, sweetheart.” Your pussy throbbed at the idea of there being a next time with him.

As he continued to slowly drag his hand along his cock, your eyes drifted to his thighs, so thick and muscular. “Does baby want to ride my thighs?” The smirk in his voice didn’t cease. You nodded, sitting up on your elbows to really look at him. The feeling from your first denied orgasm hadn’t gone away completely, only fading slightly, aching still ever so present. Minho reached down, caressing your cheek and cooing at you. “So pretty when you’re needy.” You leaned into his touch, loving how small you felt below him. But the sweetness of the moment was gone too soon, he plopped next to you on the bed and spread his legs, hand not leaving his cock.

You didn’t need to be told what to do, immediately throwing a leg over him to straddle one thigh. Though you were hesitant to sit fully on him, unsure what to do even though it’s exactly what you asked for. “Does baby need help?” Minho teased, the nickname making your legs want to clamp together but his thigh stopped you. He tapped the insides of your legs to get you to spread wider, your clit coming in contact with his warm skin. The rush was instantaneous, already stimulating. With one hand, he gripped your hip and pushed you down onto him while the other kept stroking his length.

Tears still stinging your eyes, you experimentally pushed your hips forward, hoping for some much needed friction. It was heavenly, the flex and relaxation of his thigh giving so much texture to the animalistic movement you picked up upon realizing how wonderful it felt to ride him this way. Your eyes rolled back, hands running up your own body to tweak your breasts. “Fuck, you’re so hot.” Minho moaned, deep and lustful. He tugged his cock harder, leaving crescent shaped marks in your ass. As you picked up speed, he lifted his hand and brought it down hard to the side of your thigh. The pain shocked you for a moment, making you stutter, but it didn’t deter you. Another smack, it fueled your rutting against him. “Look at you, not an ounce of shame, hm? Probably not a single thought in your head except wanting to cum. Maybe I should make you stop—“

“No! No, please! N— need to cum.” Your hips sped up as much as you could, trying to reach your high before Minho could steal it from you again.

He slapped your thigh again, “stop.” You didn’t— you couldn’t. Not when it felt so sinfully good, watching Minho jerk off to you right before your eyes while he let you use his body for your own pleasure. “C—can’t. Can’t stop. Have to—“

“I said stop.” Minho brought his hand down the hardest he had all night. But instead of it being punishing, the slap helped you rut against him rough enough to bring you to your high. Your vision went white as you screwed your eyes shut, body stilling and legs clamping incredibly hard around his thigh at the euphoria that overtook you. He let you ride it out, thumb rubbing into your hip bone. When you opened your eyes again, he was still tugging at himself, only slower now. “Think I need to teach you a lesson. Bad girls don’t get to cum.”

As spent as you were from bringing yourself to the first good orgasm you’d had in months, the very present horniness of the man below you was enticing enough to keep going. “Teach me,” you breathed out, moving to straddle him completely.

Minho let go of himself, the same hand finding the back of your hair and yanking back to expose your neck. The sting on your scalp shouldn’t have felt as good as it did, forcing you down so your wet cunt met his searing hot cock to mix with the pain. You couldn’t help but slick up and down him, wanting more even though you were ridiculously overstimulated. Another moan tore through you, making yourself and Minho shiver with lust. Realizing what you were doing, he pulled you off his cock by your hair. “Nu-uh. I’ve given you enough, now you’re just taking advantage of my kindness, baby.”

“N— no, ‘m not. Want more, want you,” you choked out, heart practically beating out of your chest. 

There was a moment he paused to watch you struggle to find pressure on your cunt, wriggling in his grasp. As much as he wanted to ruin you, make you cry and keep begging for him until you were covered in drool and cum, Minho himself was on the verge of his own release. He knew that with how long he’s wanted you, there was no way he’d be able to follow through with all the things he wanted to do to you. At least, not tonight. Smirking again, he flipped you onto your back by your hair, causing you to yelp. 

“God, you’re so spoiled,” Minho grumbled, playfully irritated as he leaned down to kiss your neck and hook his arm under one leg. “You get to watch me walk around half naked, watch me work out, listen to me talk about all the fucks I’ve had and what do I get in return?” He sat up, lifting your leg higher to rest over his shoulder. Keeping the bottom of your thigh pressed firmly against his stomach, Minho shifted to straddle your thigh that rested on the bed and tease the tip of his cock with your pussy. “Are you even the littlest bit sorry, sweetheart? You’ve kept me waiting for forever and as soon as I get you, you act like a selfish brat.” Whimper after whimper escaped your lips, longing for him to kiss you with the mouth that spoke such dirty and degrading words. 

Grabbing hold of the base of his dick, he pushed languid strokes through your folds as his eyes trained solely where your cunt and his cock met. You watched how the veins in his neck pulsed, how his chest rose and fell so heavily with need, the way his stomach tensed as he held back from pummeling you into the mattress. Part of you wanted him to lose his self restraint to the debauchery, but the sensible side of you remembered that your lack of sexual encounters for however long it’d been would cut the action short. “How badly do you want it, brat?” Minho spewed venom.

“Need it. More than anything. Need to feel you now,” you scooched down the bed as much as you could, looking for anything to calm the burning in your stomach. Minho chuckled, grabbing hold of your ass and flipping you more so that you laid almost completely on your side and had full access to your pussy. Your face flushed as he held eye contact with you, gathering a copious amount of saliva in his mouth just to let it drip slowly onto his cock and your cunt. Biting your lip, you spread your arms to grab onto something— anything. “Please, just fuck me.”

He hummed, “brats always get what the want in the end, don’t they?” Minho kissed the inside of your knee, tapping his heavy cock on your clit a few times before moving down to enter you. He went slow, the blunt cockhead penetrating your small and touch-deprived hole, the stretch stinging uncomfortable. Sensing your tension, he continued to push in shortly, only moving when your cunt relaxed slightly and you gave the okay. Though, your arousal cut the time for Minho to bottom out quickly, the base of his cock flushed against your mound. He let you adjust for a few moments before the primal urge to fuck got the best of him.

His hips pulled out and pushed back in slowly and shortly, keeping an iron grip on your leg with both of his hands. Sitting up straighter on his knees, Minho’s eyes rolled back at a particularly tight clench, one you purposely did because he looked all too comfortable. “F— fuck. No idea how long I’ve waited for this pussy to be mine.” His thrusts got harder, the sound of his balls slapping your skin echoing throughout the bedroom.

Feeling shy at his vulgarity, you moaned and lifted your arms to cover your face while simultaneously reaching to steady yourself on the headboard. However Minho was too quick and grabbed the hand closest to him, using your arm and thigh as leverage to pound into you harder. “You’re mine now, all mine. Gonna fill you up so good.” He turned his head and bit into your leg, tongue pressing flat against the mark soothingly.

“‘m yours, Minnie. ‘m yours,” the words came out between thrusts, voice bouncy as he continued his assault on your cunt. The nickname and exclamation of possession had Minho groaning, losing himself in your warm and slick walls. You were getting so close, reaching down to play with your clit while you both chased your highs. “Make me cum— need you to make me cum, Minnie, please.”

The whimper that escaped his lips caught him by surprise, almost making him lose rhythm. Minho swatted your hand away from your swollen nub to replace it with his own, circling and rubbing figure eights into it with just the right amount of pressure. His touch had your pussy fluttering around him, getting stronger with every passing second he swore he was going to explode. “So close, baby. Just a little more.” He pounded harder, slightly lifting your hips. The new angle was just enough that it hit the spot that made you drool, making you do exactly that.

You pleaded for him not to stop, to keep destroying you with his cock and fingers. Who was he to deny your requests when you asked so sweetly?

“So big, daddy. Fuck! Let me cum, please, let me cum!” It slipped from your lips before you could realize. If he didn’t have a daddy kink before, he sure as hell did now. It sounded so lewd, so dirty coming from your mouth that was usually so pure and right. 

“Go ahead, brat. Cum.” You didn’t wait another moment, letting the coil in your stomach break as Minho stayed consistently hammering you through your orgasm. Your back arched, closing your walls around him so tightly that it just about pulled him to his own edge as well. Stuttering to a stop, Minho buried himself to the hilt inside you as your walls milked him for all he had. The pent up frustration of not having an adequate partner and his lust for you made him empty a thick and heavy load into your writhing cunt.

You both took a moment to catch your breath, Minho slowly dropping your leg to the bed and hunching over you. Your eyes were closed as you regained a steady breathing pattern, opening to see him already staring at you. He puckered his lips in the same fashion you did earlier, “kiss.” You couldn’t help but laugh and bring him down by his neck to give a sweet kiss. His cock twitched inside you as your lips melted into one another, it made you wince.

Minho broke away first, gently pulling out of you and running to grab a wet towel to clean you with. After the mess was dealt with— he didn’t let you move a muscle— he fell into bed beside you.

This is what felt normal, cuddling up with him and letting your breaths fall into sync. He liked being the little spoon sometimes, your chest against his back and one arm under his neck for support while your legs tangled together. You played with his hair, brushing it away from his face as you laid kisses atop of his messy head. "Do you have dirty thoughts about all your friends?"

The sudden question made your face heat up and lightly smack his arm. "No, just you." However the lack of clothes was new, incredibly more intimate now that you’d both admitted to wanting each other for so long. That was also the scary part. Luckily, Minho was always the braver of you two, and this was no match. “I meant it. I want you.”

“You just had me,” your words whispered.

“For more than a fuck. I want you.”

“Then have me.”

-

A/N: someone play 'dirty thoughts' by Chloe Adams cus that song goes hard.

Quick update on It Was Good Until It Wasn't; I'm finally back home from my trip and can keep working on it (I wrote this one on the plane ride home bless privacy screens). Hopefully I can find the time between job hunting and other life stuffs to sit down and get it done in a few days to the next week!

Shoot me some feedback or just to chat! My asks are always open :3

The automated voice of your GPS announces you’ve reached your destination. You step on the breaks and frown at the screen of your phone, attached to the dashboard. No, this can’t be it. You’re at a cul de sac. There is no house here. No other cars. Just trees and snow and an empty road. This can’t be your destination. 

“Fuck’s sake, fuck me,” you hiss between your teeth. 

You try to enter the address you’ve been given away, but it gives no new results. Apparently you are there. Did Jisung give you the wrong address? You wouldn’t put it past him. You sigh deeply, rubbing your temples. What are you supposed to do now? The roads are a little icy, it’s getting dark, and you have no desire to drive around in the middle of nowhere trying to find this mysterious house. 

You take your phone from the holder and call your cousin. After a few rings, a familiar voice answers - it’s not Jisung, but Felix. Nothing out of the ordinary. 

“Hey, where are you?” 

“In the middle of fucking nowhere!” you cry out. “Are you sure Ji gave me the right address?” 

“Didn’t he tell you?”

“Tell me what?” 

“The GPS will only take you so far. He didn’t say anything about turning right and following the side road?”

You sigh deeply, pushing two fingers against your upper nose. In your ear, Felix lets out a chuckle. 

“I guess he didn’t,” he says. “Ok, listen.” 

He gives you a few more directions, which you try your best to remember, and you tell him you’ll be there in a few minutes - and if you’re not, that he calls you back because you’ve probably gotten lost in the woods. 

You put down your phone and accelerate slowly, making your way through the woods. The side road is mostly clear of snow, luckily, and when you spot a lighted house in between the trees, you sigh in relief. A few cars are parked there, and you can hear faint music coming from inside. 

Once you’re parked, you grab your bags from the trunk and make your way to the front door. The place is bigger than you imagined, looking modern and expensive. It’s apparently the home of a friend of Felix’s who is away on vacation for the winter and agreed that Lix hosted his party there. The whole thing had been Jisung’s idea, who wanted to make this New Year particularly memorable after a difficult year. He wanted all his friends in one place, and of course Felix had to make it dramatic and host a party of more than twenty people in a house that isn’t even his. 

Jisung and Felix, your cousins, are also twins. You grew up together. Your mother raised you on her own, had to work a lot, and so she ended up entrusting her sister to watch over you. This resulted in you spending way too much time with your cousins, the incarnations of chaos. 

A few seconds after you knock the door opens on Jisung, and he opens his arms wide for a hug but instead you gently slap the back of his head. 

“Oi, what the hell?!” he whines. 

“Forgot to tell me about the side road,” you say, still pulling him into an affectionate hug. 

“Oh, right… Sorry about that,” he chuckles. 

“I nearly got lost in the woods,” you cry out dramatically. “I could’ve frozen to death. I could’ve been eaten by a bear.”

As Jisung continues to apologize, you keep doubling down on the worst possible scenarios that could have happened. It’s certainly one aspect of your character that developed by hanging out with Jisung and Felix - a flair for the dramatic. 

A few people have already arrived for the party. Some of them you know, some you don’t - Jisung makes sure to introduce you and tells you where to put your bags. The house is big, but not that big, and all of you will have to share the different rooms with a few others. You don’t mind, it’s just for one night, and you’ve had enough sleepovers with your cousins to be comfortable sleeping in the same room as them. That’s if all of you even make it to the rooms - you can already bet people will be falling asleep all over the house in the early hours of the morning. 

You meet Felix in the kitchen, giving him a tight hug, admiring the blue highlights he’s had made in his dark hair, and start to help him get some food ready. 

On the speakers is a dynamic playlist, and you hum to the music, cutting pieces of smoked salmon to make rolls. Felix dances with you, his booming laugh filling your chest with warmth. 

A few more guests come in, a few passing in the kitchen, which you welcome with broad grins. As you are putting colorful cupcakes on a platter, the door opens and a familiar voice reaches your ears. You’d recognize that shrill laugh anywhere. You glare at Felix, who is carefully avoiding your gaze.

“You invited Daki?!” you hiss, squinting your eyes. 

Felix pinches his lips, trying to hold off laughter. “She invited herself, you know how she is. Besides she’s also our cousin, it would’ve been awkward to say no.”

“She’s not my cousin. You’re just too nice,” you groan. “I’m not going to be.” 

“Don’t be petty.” 

“Felix, she’s been mad at me ever since Hyunjin chose me to be a part of his team for that board game. And we were eight years old. I’m not petty, she is.” 

You exchange a knowing look, Felix letting out a sigh. 

“Speaking of Hyunjin, is he coming?” you ask. 

“Yes, but later,” Felix tells you. “After he gets off work.” 

“Fashionably late, as always.” 

Hyunjin was your cousin’s neighbor when you were young, and he ended up spending a lot of time with you. So did Daki, for that matter. She was Jisung and Felix’s cousin from their father’s side, and your nemesis since that fateful board game many years ago. She had a crush on Hyunjin at the time - well, she still does - and when he had chosen you to be his partner instead of hers, she had looked at you like it was your fault. You still remember her telling you, some time later, that you did it to steal him away from her. 

You had laughed because you had never been interested in Hyunjin that way, and somehow that made it worse. Ever since, everytime you met, Daki made it her job to provoke you, flirting with your boyfriends, making sure to eliminate you from games, that kind of thing. At first you fought back, but you had gotten tired. At this point, you just found it ridiculous. 

When she comes into the kitchen to put the drinks she brought in the fridge, she is closely followed by Jisung who is already giggling. When he sees your face he bursts out laughing, running away as you slowly turn the knife in your hands. 

“Hi Daki!” you say, giving her your fakest smile.

She gives you a similar one. “Y/N, it’s been so long!” 

Fortunately she does not acknowledge you more than that and you turn away, grimacing, leaving Felix to take care of her. Instead you chase your other cousin down to give him another slap behind the head, and you steal his beer for good measure. You’re not going to let this ruin your evening. 

Jisung throws an arm around your shoulder, his grin taking half of his face. You sit down on the stairs, sipping his beer, looking around, while Jisung answers a message on his phone. People are spread around the room - a few are chatting around the fireplace, others are already busy playing a card game. On the couch next to the fireplace, a bit further away, is a gorgeous looking girl with long chestnut hair, Yuna, who your cousin has a crush on, talking with a guy with wide shoulders. You don’t know either of them, but you find yourself staring at the guy in question. 

Dark hair, almost black, unevenly brushes his forehead. Glistening eyes of deep brown, plump lips in the shape of a heart that are slightly pouted. He wears silver jewelry, a simple chain around his neck, two small hoops on his ear, a bracelet that moves as he explains something. On his shoulders, a fitted beige sweater that hints at an impressively muscled chest, tucked at the waist in a pair of black pants. You eye him up and down, all the way to his elegant leather shoes. 

His sleeves are rolled up a little, his smirk leans on the left side of his face, and from where you sit you can hear the hints of a rough, loud voice.

You slap Jisung’s shoulder, getting his attention. 

“Who is that?” you ask him, nodding towards the stranger. 

Jisung follows your gaze. “Oh, you haven’t met Changbin?” 

Changbin. That’s his name. It suits him.

You glare at Jisung. “No, but I want to.” 

Your cousin lets out an amused laugh. “We work together. He’s the one that came up with the concept I told you about?” 

“Really?” you say, unable to hide the interest in your voice. 

“Keep your panties on, please. But don’t worry, your favorite cousin will introduce you. It’ll give me an excuse to flirt with Yuna.” 

You roll your eyes at the “favorite cousin” appellation - he and Felix have been at it since you were old enough to understand the concept - but give him a thankful nod. You follow Jisung, who taps Changbin’s shoulder when you get close enough. Both him and Yuna look up. 

“Sorry to interrupt,” Jisung says cheerfully. “Bin, I wanted to introduce you to Y/N, my cousin.” 

Changbin glances at you with a smile, turning on the couch to get a better look at you. You wave at him with your most charming smile. It wouldn’t be much of a party if you didn’t get to flirt a little, right? 

“Oh, the infamous cousin,” Changbin chuckles. “I actually heard a lot about you. But then again, Ji talks a lot.” 

You laugh, ignoring Jisung’s complaints beside you. “It’s nice to meet you. I actually heard about you, too. I love that city lights concept you came up with.” 

Changbin’s face lights up, and you feel your heart flutter a little. You can’t help it - he’s incredibly charming, his smile even more. Jisung clears his throat next to you as you stare at Changbin, and him at you. 

“Hey, Yuna, want to get a drink?” 

The latter chuckles, nodding at Jisung. “Let’s go.” 

They walk away, and you point to the spot on the couch next to Changbin. “Can I sit down?” 

“Please,” he says. 

You sit, unable to stop looking at him. Of course Jisung would not have mentioned how hot his colleague was to you, but he is exactly your type and your cousin knows that. He’ll have to get another slap behind the head for that. 

“So you grew up with Ji, huh?” Changbin asks, leaning back on the couch. 

You nod. “Yup, him and Felix. My mom worked a lot, so my aunt watched over me.” 

“That must’ve been… exhausting,” Changbin chuckles. 

“I’m not that much better than them, to be honest,” you laugh. “Sometimes I might even be worse.” 

Amusement flashes in Changbin’s eyes. “I’m sensing good stories here.” 

You smile, unabashedly flirting. “You want one?” 

“Please.” 

So you tell him about the time the three built a fort when you were about ten and you had designated yourself main architect. You had made them build the whole thing, and then had pretended to throw a fit and destroyed everything. You played the same game two more times until you were “satisfied,” leaving your cousins frustrated and exhausted. 

Changbin listens attentively to you throughout, laughing, and you quickly grow fond of the sound. It’s playful, makes you laugh even more, and you get so immersed in your conversation you almost forget about the rest of the party. 

You notice a little scar on his chin. A beauty mark on his right ear. 

You talk for a while, sitting close to each other, when Felix appears from the kitchen and asks for your help. You apologize to Changbin, who tells you to go. 

“We’ll talk later,” he tells you with a wink. 

When you head to the kitchen, your legs feel a little wobbly. You’ve been smiling so much your cheeks hurt a little. 

You help Felix bring the food to the big table, which is set like a buffet. When you catch a glance of Changbin staring at you, you almost drop all the plates in your hands, because he is looking up and down at your body almost hungrily. If you were the type to blush, you would be scarlet right now. 

But you’re not. Instead, you have to refrain yourself from just walking over to him, dragging him over to the nearest room and making out until you can’t breathe. Your thoughts derail as you walk back to the kitchen. 

It’s been forever since you’ve felt such an instant attraction with someone. It has happened before, with one of your exes, a colleague at work. But like this? You aren’t sure but it might have never been this strong. All you want is to look back at him. See that lust in his eyes again. Know everything about him. You feel like you could run away to the other side of the world in this instant, take the biggest risks, a leap into the unknown, and he’d be holding your hand, laughing with you.  

What if you did drag him to a private spot? What would he say? Would he kiss you back, slide his fingers under your blouse? You would feel his muscles against your hands, bite into his full lips, push him inside you…

“You all right, cuz?” 

You look at Felix, who is frowning. 

“You looked really out of it just now,” he says. 

You bite your lip. “I’m fine, don’t worry,” you answer, although you can’t stay impassive.  

Felix’s mouth breaks into a grin.

“What were you thinking about, huh?” he giggles. “Or rather, who were you thinking about?” 

You nudge him, smirking to yourself. 

“Leave my dirty thoughts alone,” you tell him. 

He gasps. “So there IS someone… Tell me, tell me, please.” 

“No way,” you laugh. “If I tell you, next time you talk to him you won’t be able to stop giggling. I love you, Lix, but you’re the worst at keeping secrets.” 

He pouts, gathering forks to put on the table. 

“If you tell me your secret, I’ll tell you mine.” 

“What?!” you say. “You have a secret?” 

“I do.” 

“What is it?” 

“Only if you tell me who you were thinking of.” 

You squint your eyes, trying to decide if your cousin is making all of this up just to get the name out of you. It just isn’t Felix’s style, but you never know. As you’re trying to make up your mind, Jisung appears, sliding in the space between you.   

“What are we whispering about?” 

“Y/N was just going to tell me who she’s daydreaming fucking the brains out of,” Felix says with a sleazy smile. 

“Oh, Changbin?” Jisung says. 

You give him a furious look as Felix bursts out laughing. “JI, FUCK’S SAKE…” 

“Oops,” Jisung chuckles, putting a hand over his mouth. 

You slap his arm repeatedly, pouting. “Now I’ll never know Felix’s secret.” 

“What secret? That he hooked up with theatre guy?” 

“JISUNG,” Felix yells. 

It’s your turn to laugh hysterically, shaking your head. Eventually the three of you are snickering like you’re twelve again and looking up porn on the internet - you just wanted to see what all the fuss was about. 

“Never mind what I said, Lix,” you say, wiping tears from your eyes. “Ji is definitely the worst at keeping secrets.”

You’re eating too much, you’re drinking too much, you’re laughing too much - but is there such a thing as too much when it comes to those? It’s what parties are all about to you, anyway. 

Another thing you’re doing too much is flirting. You’ve always enjoyed it and clearly, so does Changbin, because like other things, you indulge in it a little too much.

There’s really no other way to say it - Changbin and you have been eyefucking each other since you met. Sitting beside one another, or being on opposite sides of the room, it seems like your eyes have constantly drawn to the other’s. At one point you thought he would be the one to take your hand and drag you away from the crowd, but neither of you have made a move yet. There has been some hand brushing, a few suggestive looks, even a seductive eyebrow raise or two. You gather that both of you are enjoying the tension that is rising, the what if that is surely turning into a when, waiting for the right opportunity. 

That has made an already wonderful evening even better. The food is delicious, the booze is plentiful, and Daki has barely bothered you so far, too busy glancing at the door, clearly waiting for Hyunjin to show up. She’s made you a few snarky comments but you can’t be bothered by them when Changbin stretches his arms, flexing his biceps a little, his shirt embracing his pectoral muscles. You’d rather focus on that.

Music is playing loudly, people are getting decidedly drunk, midnight is approaching, and you agree to play a game of poker with your cousins, Yuna, Changbin and a few others. Daki joins you seconds before the game starts, sitting next to Changbin. You can guess she’s noticed you and him flirting, and that she will try and get his attention to annoy you. Too predictable, Daki. She’s probably bored because Hyunjin isn’t here yet and she can’t annoy him. 

You are right, of course. You haven’t been playing for two minutes and she’s already whispering things in Changbin’s ear. However, the latter isn’t responding to her at all - he even shoots her annoyed glances, which makes you snicker. You try to focus on your own game, but it’s too entertaining to see Changbin repeatedly shooting down her attempts to flirt. When she giggles hysterically, leaning against him, Changbin directly takes her hand and puts it away from him, giving her a look that clearly says leave me alone. 

You bite your lip so hard it almost bleeds, trying not to burst out laughing. You’re not petty, but this is almost better than sex.

As you end the first round, Daki finally seems to give up on Changbin. You hope she will just go away, but of course she stays for another round and changes her target - you. 

When you make a raise, she laughs mockingly. 

“I think Y/N has good cards, guys,” she says. “Look at her face, it’s just so obvious.” 

You ignore her, keeping a straight face, but of course that only makes her laugh harder, and she points at you. 

“Aw, look, she’s trying to bluff. That’s cute, Y/N, really.” 

You keep ignoring her - her words aren’t getting to you. You notice that Changbin, however, is getting angry. He scrunches his nose, tilting his head to the side, as if he’s trying to stop himself from telling her to shut up. You try to smile at him to reassure him, but he’s too busy damning her to hell with his eyes. 

As if he wasn’t already so damn attractive. 

Daki continues taunting you, inciting the others to ruin your game, but except for those who don’t know you, none of them are having it. The atmosphere is tense. You will thank them later - for the moment, you focus on playing, because you have a plan and it is working perfectly. 

It ends up between you and Daki, of course, as you planned. You stare at her as she reveals her cards. A flush. 

“Not bad,” you say. 

“I’m so good at poker, Y/N, don’t worry!” she laughs.

“Yeah, like, I don’t know,” you say, putting on a fake confused expression as you put down your cards. “Isn’t this better?” 

Everyone looks at your cards. You have a flush, too - except it’s a straight one. The tension evaporates as the table erupts in screams and applause, and you finally break into a grin. Felix and Jisung jump on you, making you fall backwards, while Yuna gets a bottle of whisky to pour a few shots. You just get a glimpse at Daki’s defeated face, not giving her your attention. Instead you focus on Changbin’s shining eyes and amused smirk. 

You raise your shot glass to him. 

Hyunjin arrives not long after, holding the hand of his new girlfriend. She has red hair and the most beautiful smile. As you hug your old friend, you take a look at Daki, who looks like she’s just been slapped. Karma’s a bitch, huh?

You can’t help but snicker. That might be a little petty, but you’ve been drinking and you don’t care. Daki’s hurt your feelings more times than you can count in the past, and you feel like her having a shitty evening barely grazes the idea of payback. Unluckily, she catches you laughing and heads towards you, fists clenched, eyes full of rage. 

“What are you laughing at, you fucking bitch?” she spits at you.

You raise your hands. “Woah, calm down, will you?” 

“You think I’m pathetic?” she chuckles mockingly. “Have you seen yourself acting like a fucking slut all night? You think that guy’s going to be interested in you? You’re just a skank and everybody knows -” 

“What the fuck’s your problem?” 

You and Daki turn your heads towards Changbin, who has appeared next to you. His jaw is clenched, and he’s looking down at Daki with disgust. 

Daki scoffs. “This is none of your -” 

“Leave her alone,” Changbin interrupts in a dry voice. 

“I’m not going to -”

“Fuck off.” 

His voice is so commanding that Daki pales a little. She straightens her back, shoots you a last malicious look and walks away. You breathe out, shaking your head. 

“Fuck,” you sigh. “I thought she was going to hit me for a second there.” 

Changbin shakes his head, giving Daki a dirty look. 

“You guys have history or something?” 

“Yeah,” you sigh. “A long one.” 

He gives you a nod, sensing you do not want to talk about it too much. Instead you smile at him, sliding a hand through your hair. 

“Thanks for the intervention. I appreciate it. I’m too drunk to be the bigger person, so it would have ended badly.” 

He smirks, leaning towards you. You get a whiff of his cologne and it makes you a little dizzy. Fuck, he smells good. 

“I have an idea,” he breathes in your ear. 

You frown, giving him a questioning look. He raises an eyebrow. 

“On how you can pay me back.” 

The words send your thoughts reeling. Oh, fuck. Is he finally going to do it? Take your hand and lead you to an empty room to ruin you? You hope so. You so desperately hope so. 

Are you a little too horny? 

“Yeah?” you ask, your voice a little weak. 

“Follow me.” 

He takes your hand and guides you through the room. Your heart is pounding, your eyes fixed on the back of his neck. Is this happening? It’s going too fast and not nearly fast enough. Your mouth is dry, your legs weak, and -

Changbin goes to the kitchen. You frown when he stops at the counter, looking at the numerous bottles of strong alcohol that are stored there, carefully choosing one. You’re confused - but clearly, you misread his intentions. 

He shows you the bottle of tequila rose, and you chuckle. 

“You want me to take a shot?” you suggest. 

He grins. “Jisung came to work one morning with the worst hangover I’d ever seen. Said it was the fault of homemade shots with tequila rose in them. Made by you. I don’t know why, it stuck in my head, and I’d like to try one.” 

“Oh,” you laugh. “You mean the Hot Lips.” 

You don’t miss Changbin glancing at your mouth, looking perfectly satisfied with the turn of events. “Is that what they are called?” 

“It is,” you answer, taking the bottle from his hands. “Give me that. You’re not ready for this. Your liver will hate you tomorrow.”

“Can’t wait.” 

You get busy gathering the ingredients while Changbin gets the shot glasses, and you talk about that infamous night with your cousins. You, Felix and Jisung had gotten so ridiculously drunk on your shots you had gone outside in the freezing winter to build a snowman at three in the morning wearing no shoes. You were horribly sick for nearly a week after that. 

Changbin stays close to you as you pour the right ounces of the ingredients. Tequila rose. Grenadine. Soda. A little vodka. A little whisky. And a little surprise of your own. 

“Just a little bit of lemon to soften the sweetness,” you whisper to Changbin, giving him a wink. “Don’t tell anyone.” 

He’s standing so close to you you can feel his breathing in your hair. 

“I wouldn’t dare.” 

You turn to face him, keeping your eyes in his. You hand him his shot, filled to the brim, and take yours. 

“See you on the other side,” you tell him. 

You cheer and take the shot. The taste is almost overwhelming in your throat, and you let out a sharp woo. Glancing at Changbin, you realize he’s closed his eyes. He shakes his head and groans. 

“Damn, fuck, that is strong,” he laughs. 

You bite your lip, trying not to laugh too much, but his eyes are glimmering with mischief. He puts down the shot glass, licking his lips slowly. His eyes find yours again, and he takes another step towards you. You’re just drunk enough for your inhibitions to have disappeared. Changbin smells good. Changbin looks good. 

“Delicious, though,” he states, staring at you intently. “Just the right amount of sweet. Just the right amount of rough.”

You swallow, mouth parted. You’re not even sure what he is talking about, at this point.

“I can see why it’s addictive,” he smirks. “Can I have another?” 

“As many as you want, baby.” 

The nickname escapes your lips but he doesn’t seem to mind it. On the contrary, his smirk deepens and you feel the warmth pooling between your legs. You must already be soaked at this point. Fuck, there’s no one in the room. What if I sucked his dick in the kitchen? Would he like that? 

You chuckle to yourself, and Changbin looks at you questioningly. 

“I was just thinking about sucking your dick,” you say. 

Changbin remains silent, and you realize that you’ve actually said this. Out loud. 

You gasp, your eyes wide. You stammer. “Holy fuck, I’m sorry. Shit, I’m sorry, I don’t know why I said that, it just -” 

“Why don’t you?” he interrupts, his voice low and husky, placing his fingers underneath your chin to lift your head. You meet his gaze, dark and lustful. “I wouldn’t mind you sucking my dick right now. I bet you’d look even more sweet with your mouth full.” 

You gulp, feeling your walls clench at the sound of his words. Fuck, you need this man to ruin you right now. You’re dizzy with arousal, and he gently takes your hand, guides it on his crotch. He places your palm around his hardening cock, and you can’t hold back a whimper. 

“You’re not going to leave me with this unattended, are you, baby?” 

Instinctively, your hand squeezes his cock, and you smile. 

“I wouldn’t dare.” 

Outside the kitchen you hear people bursting into laughter. The risk of someone walking in is so dangerously high it makes you dizzy, but you’re a little too drunk to care. And honestly, it makes the whole situation even better. 

Keeping your eyes in his, you unzip his pants, taking out his cock. It’s decidedly hard now, which makes you very happy. You kneel on the cold floor, looking up at Changbin. Slowly, keeping your eyes in his, you lick the length of his cock, smearing your saliva on it so you can lazily stroke it. He pushes the hair out of your face, biting his lower lip. 

“You look fucking good like that, Y/N,” he growls. “I fucking love that dress, by the way. Made me want to snuggle my dick between your tits all night.” 

You chuckle, kissing the tip of his cock. “Who knows, if you’re nice to me, your dream might come true.” 

“Nice?” he laughs. “I’m not sure I know how to do nice. But I can certainly fuck your brains out.”

“Sounds nice enough to me.” 

You guide his cock in your mouth, slowly taking it as deep as you can. Changbin breathes out, holding your hair. You start to bob your head up and down his length, swirling your tongue at the same time. 

“Good, that’s good,” he whispers. “Fucking good.” 

Encouraged by his praise, you accelerate your movements, and Changbin thrusts his hips sharply. Surprised, you gag a little, taking a deep breath. 

“Hm,” he chuckles. “Let’s try it again, huh? I know you can do better.” 

It’s like he knows exactly what to tell you - you can do better, and you want to prove it to him. So you take him in your mouth again, taking your hand off his base, and make sure you almost reach his pelvis. Changbin breathes a guttural growl, pushing your head against the kitchen island, trapping you there. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, yes.” 

He fucks your mouth and you feel your eyes tear up, but you adore the sounds he makes, the way his face scrunches as he throbs in your mouth. When he pulls back after a few seconds to let you breathe, you give him a broad smile. 

“This is so fucking hot,” you chuckle. 

Changbin smiles, grazing your cheek with his thumb. “You like this, Y/N?” You like the way he says your name, like he’s still learning it, tasting it on his tongue. “Well, maybe you are a slut, huh?” 

“For you, definitely,” you tell him. 

“That’s the attitude,” he grins. “Keep sucking, my little slut.” 

You go back to it. As you moan around his length, the kitchen door opens, and Changbin quickly pulls himself out of your mouth. Luckily, from where you are behind the kitchen island, you are not visible from the entrance of the kitchen, and the island is high enough to prevent the person from seeing what is exactly happening. 

“Oh, Changbin,” the person says, and you realize it’s Felix.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. 

“Have you seen Y/N?” your cousin asks, his voice slurry. “It’s going to be midnight soon, and we always celebrate together, and…” 

He rambles on, clearly drunker than you. That might help prevent him from suspecting anything, you tell yourself. Still, you bite your lip hard, trying not to move or breathe too loud. 

“I haven’t, sorry,” Changbin says. “Just fixing myself a drink. Maybe she went to get some air outside?” 

Felix gasps. “Oh, right. Good idea.” 

For a second you think Felix might have gone, but Changbin remains immobile, and when you look up he’s giving your cousin a broad smile. 

“You need help with something?” Felix offers. 

“Nope,” Changbin quickly replies. “All good.” 

“Cool,” Felix says. “I’ll check outside, thanks, Changbin.”

You see him wave, and the kitchen door closes behind your cousin. You breathe out, and you look at each other for a second before starting to laugh. 

“Fuck, that would’ve been awkward,” you say. 

“He’s so drunk I bet he wouldn’t have noticed,” Changbin replies, stroking your hair. “You still good to go?” 

You smile. “Fuck, yeah.” 

“Oh, you like that, don’t you? The risk of being walked on. I can see it in your eyes.” 

You don’t deny it - instead, you take his cock and slap it against your tongue. Changbin throws his head backwards and guides himself back in your mouth. It fits back easily, and you secure your hands on his thighs. 

“How does my cock fit in your mouth so well?” he breathes. “My good little slut.”

You let him fuck your mouth, feeling his thrusts getting a little more restless, and from the way he grips your hair, you know he is close. 

“I’m gonna come,” he grunts. “Look at me, Y/N.” 

When your eyes flutter up to meet his, Changbin lets out a shaky breath. You hold his penetrative gaze as he buck his hips and empties himself in your mouth. He manages not to make too much noise, clenching his jaw, and when he relaxes, you take his cock in your hands and proceed to lick him clean. You trace his length, lick your lips, and he twitches a little, coming down from his orgasm. 

“Did my little slut swallow everything?” he asks hoarsely. 

You nod, showing him your tongue. He chuckles, putting his cock back in his pants. You look at his face, smiling, and he brings you up to your feet. 

“Let’s fix you up.” 

He proceeds to put your hair back in order, taking a napkin to wipe the corners of your mouth and the mascara that dripped down your cheeks a little. Meanwhile you just take the opportunity to look at him. When he’s done, he eyes you up and down, and you pout. 

“What about me?” 

“What about you, sweet thing?” 

“I want to come in your mouth, too.” 

Changbin smiles, and you take his hand to guide it under your dress. You open his palm so he cups your soaked underwear. The contact already makes you moan, and you roll your hips against his hand. 

“I’m so fucking wet, Changbin…” 

He parts his mouth at the same time the kitchen door opens again. You twirl around, Changbin’s hand escaping the throbbing space between your legs. It’s Felix again. 

“I didn’t find her, so I -” 

Your cousin stops, staring at you, blinking, visibly confused. 

“I found her,” Changbin smiles. 

You grin at your cousin, who finally breaks into a smile and walks up to you, oblivious, rambling about the fact that it’s almost midnight and you almost missed it. You can feel it - you’ve been lucky not to get caught during the blowjob, and you can’t push it. Your drenched, aching cunt will have to wait.

“THREE, TWO, ONE… HAPPY NEW YEAR!” 

As per tradition, you, Felix and Jisung grab each other’s shoulders and start to turn in a circle. It’s something you’ve created when you were kids. You call it your manifesting circle, invoking good energy for the rest of the year. It’s bullshit, but you couldn’t see yourself not doing it every New Year’s. 

Felix smooches you on the cheek, Jisung runs away to find Yuna, and you feel someone tapping your shoulder. You turn to find Changbin standing behind you, a smirk on his lips. He takes your chin in his hand and guides your head upwards, kissing you deeply. Felix yells happily in your ear, but you barely hear him, drunk on the booze, drunk on Changbin’s tongue playing with yours. You wrap your arms around his neck, making out with him for what seems like hours, until you’re out of breath, until you can barely stand straight. 

When you look at him afterwards, his eyes are shining, and his smile steals your heart. 

“Happy New Year,” he whispers. 

The only thing reminding you that what happened with Changbin is real is that your mouth and throat feel a little sore - but other than that, you might have thought it was some kind of vivid, waking dream. 

You want to keep talking to him, but Felix really wants to dance with you and you can never say no to him, so Changbin just decides to do it with the two of you. You giggle excitedly as he rolls his hips seductively, and you and Felix show him a choreography that you created when you were kids. Changbin laughs so hard he holds his sides.  

When the three of you get too tired, Felix joins a board game and Changbin sits down on the couch next to you, his arm around your shoulder, not caring in the slightest at what people might say. You snuggle against him as you talk to Hyunjin, who wanted to talk to you about Daki. She has gone home, apparently. You feel bad for her, but not really. It never brings any good to be mean with no reason, Hyunjin tells you. 

You and Changbin keep close to each other, exchanging knowing smiles. His hand is resting on your thigh, and your head is leaning on his shoulder. You’re a little impatient for more, but it’s also thrilling. You want to kiss him. You want to know how his tongue feels against yours. How he would use his lips on your pussy. How his cock would feel inside you. You want to hear him groan again. 

Although he’s softer outside of sex, you’re not surprised by his dominating personality, and you find yourself craving it. It’s not always a kink of yours, but with the right person, it can reduce you to a trembling mess, which is exactly what you want to become in Changbin’s arms. There’s just something about him. 

So you slowly and discreetly pull on your dress so it falls higher on your thighs. Changbin’s eyes drop on them, and he slides his hand higher. You repeat the same game two more times, stopping before it gets downright inappropriate. Eventually you can’t focus on anything else, so you stand up and say you’re going to the bathroom. 

You’re hoping Changbin gets the hint. You don’t care much anymore - everyone is either too drunk or busy to notice, and you’ve seen people disappearing for a while inside rooms. Why not you? It’s the new year, open to all opportunities, and you’re not going to waste this one. 

You walk up the stairs, glancing back at Changbin who is staring at you, biting his lip. You just smile back, and you walk very slowly upstairs. You’re almost there when you hear footsteps behind you, and you barely have time to twirl on your feet that Changbin grabs your wrist and pulls you inside the bathroom. He slams you against the door, his eyes drilling into yours. 

“I think you might be having an issue with your dress,” he smiles. 

“Do I?” you ask innocently. “Maybe you should help me with it.” 

He chuckles, spinning you around. Your palms rest against the door, your ass facing him. Changbin hikes up your dress slowly, revealing your panties. He groans and slaps your ass, kneading the skin.

“My little slut,” he breathes. “Already can’t get enough of me, huh?” 

“I can’t focus on anything,” you admit with a chuckle. “I need you, Changbin, please…” 

You breathe heavily as he brushes a finger against the fabric of your panties, over your clit and your entrance. You are soaked. 

“Fuck, please touch me…” 

He slaps your ass again, drawing a sharp breath from your mouth. 

“You want to show me your pretty pussy?” he breathes in your ear. 

“Yes.” 

“You want my fingers or my tongue?” 

“T-tongue.” 

He chuckles, taking a step back, and you glance above your shoulder to see him kneel behind you. He grins at you, pulling down your panties. 

“Arch that cute ass for me, will you?” 

You do, and he hums appreciatively, spreading your legs to get better access. He starts by coating your pussy with his fingers, licking your juices off them, and then his tongue flicks you. 

“Fuck,” you moan, twitching a little. 

“You taste so good, baby,” he sighs. “I’m going to make you come so hard your legs won’t be able to hold you up.” 

You breathe out, aching for more of his touch, and fortunately Changbin obliges. His mouth comes to rest against your throbbing cunt, and he starts to eat you out hungrily. His tongue swirls against you, presses against your clit, teases your entrance. Changbin holds your thighs apart, massaging your skin, and as you whimper and pant against his caresses, his thumb circles your folds. 

“Don’t fucking stop,” you cry out, feeling your orgasm building quickly. 

He doesn’t, only smiles against your pussy, and it’s the best feeling in the world. He kisses you, rolling his tongue on your wetness, and you only wish you could see him there, buried between your legs, his mouth and chin coated in you. 

You push your fingers against the door, biting your lip as your orgasm suddenly flashes through you. A cry escapes your mouth, your entire body shaking against Changbin who does not stop and even accelerates, guiding you through. When your muscles untense, you feel your legs give in, but Changbin quickly sits up to hold you up by the waist, pulling you to him with a chuckle. 

“What did I say, huh?” 

He groans in your ear, and you feel his hard cock against your ass. 

“I need to fuck that tight little cunt of yours. Just like it is now. Still throbbing, all drenched and ready for me.” 

“Do it, Changbin,” you nod, still hazy from your orgasm. “P-please.” 

He quickly undoes his belt and frees his cock, and brushes it against your still sensitive folds. You moan, Changbin breathing hard against your neck. 

“Ready, baby?” 

You nod, and he enters you slowly, leaving you time to adjust to him. He feels big and thick, but you’re so wet he slides in easily, not stopping until he is deep inside of you. Once he’s there, you both breathe out, chuckling in delight. 

“That’s where my cock belongs,” Changbin growls. “You good?” 

“Fuck, yes,” you sigh. 

You roll your ass against him, and Changbin takes it as an invitation to start moving. He draws his hips away from you only to thrust sharply, fucking you hard. Soon he’s pounding into you, and you’re moaning, and he’s holding your waist and burying himself inside of you like he’s going mad. 

Neither of you are going to last long, you can feel it. The teasing has been enough, and deep down you know this won’t be your last time fucking. 

“I want to fucking come inside of you,” he breathes. “Will you let me, little slut? Take my cum deep, keep it in you?” 

“Yes,” you breathe. “Give it to me. Fuck, I’m gonna come again.” 

He’s rubbing against the right spots and you’re rolling your eyes in your head. As your second orgasm flashes through you, you clench around Changbin and he lets out a low groan. You feel his cock twitch and then spurt inside of you, warm and heavy. 

He fucks you until you both ride out your orgasms, breathing heavily, his body laying against yours. Once your breathing steadies, Changbin removes himself from inside of you, and you feel his cum, mixed with your own, sliding down your inner thigh. 

You fall into his arms, letting out a long, shaky sigh. 

“Fuck… That was so good,” you breathe with a laugh. “You are so good at this, what the fuck?” 

“Right back at you,” he chuckles, pushing your hair away from your face before giving you a long kiss. “Let’s clean you up. We still have a party to attend.”

Felix is trying to explain a board game to you. He’s the worst at it. You really should just read the instruction manual, but you like hearing his voice, so you let him do it. Eventually, though, he just gives up. It’s way too late and you’re both too drunk to play such a complicated game, anyway. Instead Felix relaxes on the couch, and you lean against him. 

You talk about food, about family, about work - and then Felix catches you looking over at Changbin, who is clearly winning a game of beer pong not too far. 

“So, Changbin?” he asks, grinning. “Anything happened between you?” 

You smirk, and Felix breaks into giggles. 

“Tell me, tell me,” he begs. 

“A lady doesn’t tell,” you reply, poking his chest. 

Felix scoffs. “You, a lady? Please. I’m more of a lady than you.” 

“True,” you laugh. “Well… Yeah, something might’ve happened.” 

“Oh, that smile,” he says. “You really like him, huh?” 

You nod. 

Felix wiggles his eyebrows. “Why not go spend more time with him?” 

“Maybe later,” you smile. “For now I like spending time with my favorite cousin.” 

“Tssssk,” Felix chuckles. “I don’t believe you. You say that, but I know you tell Ji the same.” 

“Well Ji is clearly busy somewhere else, so it’s you I get to annoy.” 

You start to tickle him, and Felix gets distracted into another conversation topic, and you lose track of time, soothed by the sound of your cousin breathing, the music, the conversation around you. 

It feels like seconds later when you open your eyes, realizing you’ve been dozing off on Felix’s shoulder. Your cousin is deep asleep next to you, cuddling the plush mushroom he got from the gift exchange. He’s not the only one - a lot of people have gone to their rooms, the music is softer, and the place is a reassuring mess, with plates and glasses and pieces of wrapping paper everywhere.

Near the fireplace, Hyunjin is stroking his girlfriend’s hair, lovingly whispering things in her ear. You stand up on shaky legs, looking around for Changbin. He’s sitting in a corner with another guy, playing a quiet game of cards. You catch his gaze, and he smirks, waving at you to come. You drag your feet towards him, settling down on his leg. You nestle your head in the crook of his neck, and Changbin chuckles. 

You’re good there. You doze off a little again, and open your eyes when you hear Changbin’s friend say he’s going to sleep. You expect him to get up and walk upstairs, but instead he draws his hoodie on his head, leans against the wall and closes his eyes. You giggle, turning your face towards Changbin. 

“You want to go to bed?” he whispers. 

“Hm,” you nod. 

“Let’s go.” 

He takes your hand gently and you follow him upstairs. The first room is locked, another is already packed. The last one you find has two other people in it, so you head back downstairs and decide to nestle in an unoccupied corner of the living room. Changbin finds two blankets, laying one down on the floor, and another on your bodies. You snuggle against him, his arm enveloping you. You feel his breath in your neck. 

The living room is silent. All you can hear is the hushed whispers of Hyunjin and his girlfriend - but even those stop after a few minutes. The fire is nearly extinguished, the living room plunged in darkness. You feel warm and safe in Changbin’s arms - but you can’t bring yourself to sleep. All you can think about is how nice his body feels, how wet you are - and how you feel his cock hardening against your ass. 

“What are you thinking about?” you whisper. 

He lets out a breath. “Are you still wet?” 

His low voice in your ear makes you shiver. You nod. 

“Good,” he answers. 

His hand slips on your waist, feeling the fabric of your dress. You breathe out, closing your eyes to enjoy the sensation. His fingers go further up, cupping your breasts, teasing your nipples. You arch your back, pushing your ass against his crotch. Changbin starts to breathe heavily in your neck, sending strands of your hair dancing. 

You don’t even care that you’re in the middle of a room filled with people. You just want to feel him. Besides, nobody is paying attention to you. The room is dark, and you’re protected by the blanket. 

Changbin’s hand pushes up your dress, removes your panties. When his fingers finally find your still soaked cunt, you softly whimper. 

“Fuck, you’re so warm,” Changbin breathes. “Can you be a good girl and be silent, baby?” 

You nod again. 

“Just don’t stop touching me,” you tell him. 

He smiles against the back of your neck, planting a kiss there. You open your legs a little, facilitating his access. Changbin takes two fingers and pushes them on your swollen clit, tracing wide circles, exerting just the right amount of pressure. You shudder, biting your lip to keep from moaning aloud. 

But you keep breathing, holding it back to enjoy Changbin’s caresses. His fingers relieve the ache of your folds, and then he teases your entrance. When he plunges into you, caressing your inner walls, you have to grab his sweater behind you, anything to keep yourself from moaning his name. He starts to finger you, relentlessly. It feels so fucking good. 

“Is that good, Y/N? Do you love my fingers deep inside your cunt?” 

“Yes, Changbin, fuck…” 

“I can’t wait to replace them with my cock.”

You clench around his fingers, and he must feel it, because he chuckles. 

“Do you want that, huh? Do you want me to fuck you in the middle of a crowded room?” 

“I want you to fuck me, Changbin, please… Fuck, I’m gonna come -” 

He removes his fingers in a sweep, leaving you gasping. Changbin pushes a hand against your mouth, muffling the sound. 

“Can’t have you waking everyone up, baby,” he whispers in your ear. 

You feel him pull down his pants, the tip of his cock brushing your cunt, and you breathe against his fingers. He holds them there, pushing himself inside of you, stretching you. He feels big, he feels good, already familiar - and you fall back against his body. His chest feels firm, his arms big and strong. Although there’s not much space for maneuver under the blanket, Changbin still manages to buck his hips, filling you deep. His thrusts are slow and powerful, making your body shake, and the rest of the world becomes a blur. 

“Shhhh,” he breathes in your ear. “Do you want them to know I’m fucking you?” 

You can’t help but whimper a little against his palm as he fucks you deeper, slamming his hips into you, and then you’re coming, writhing in his arms. Changbin growls in your ear, fucking you even faster, and then you feel him come inside of you. You are still trembling, slowly coming down your high, and Changbin removes his hand. 

He sighs, and you let out a chuckle, turning to face him. 

“Do you think anybody noticed?” you whisper, and he smiles. 

“I don’t really care.” 

You smile back, rubbing your nose on his jaw, his neck. Your eyes are heavy, and you feel yourself drifting off. 

“Y/N?” he asks in your ear. 

“Hm?” 

“Will you go on a date with me next week?” 

You open your eyes just enough to see him look at you. You kiss him, gently, and put your hand against his chest. 

“I thought you’d never ask.”

changbin has obsessed been with backshots from the day you starting sleeping together, always manhandling you onto your hands and knees at a certain point whenever he fucks you. when you do it in front of a mirror you can see him looking down, focused on the way his cock moves in and out of your pussy or maybe the way your ass jiggles when his hips slam against it, positively staring as he pumps his hips and groans to himself. changbin has been an amazing fuck from the start - passionate, assertive and just rough enough when he needs to be - but you’ve always felt like he’s holding back on you somehow, despite the intensity and energy he brings.

and still. finding out that changbin has a special liking for anal of all things somehow surprises you for a second - then everything falls into place when you keep scrolling down the files upon files of porn on his laptop. you click on a couple of thumbnails, scrolling through the clips and playing a couple of seconds of each one. you’ve watched porn before of course, but something about this, about having access to changbin’s favorite videos makes it feel different. it makes your face burn with something akin to embarrassment and pride when you realize that the people in those clips kind of look like you or sound like you - voice turning breathy and shaky when they get stretched out and fucked into the mattress by their broad dom, camera focusing on the thick cock moving in and out of the tight ring of their ass while their pussy remains untouched.

of course it’s not a big deal. it’s not an interest that’s very out there or uncommon and it’s definitely not something changbin has to share with you. trying anal with him just hasn’t crossed your mind so far, satisfied with all the other things you’ve been doing - but now you want to indulge him nevertheless.

if you’re being completely honest, you want to indulge yourself too, considering how much the videos did for you when you imagined yourself and changbin in the actors’ places.

you decide it’s the most fun to surprise changbin with a butt plug - you wearing it for him and giving him the option to replace it with his cock, if he wanted to.

ordering it online and waiting for it to arrive makes you giddy, the thought of what might happen soon turning you on so much that you’re barely able to keep your little secret from changbin at times.

when the package gets delivered only days later - perfectly timed, you know changbin will be home in an hour or so - you already feel your heartbeat drumming in your ears with excitement when you open your little gift uo up, feeling the weight of the plug in your hand. it’s smaller than changbin of course, but something prettily shaped and nice enough to work yourself open a bit for both of your convenience.

you waste no time to jump into the shower, thinking about how excited changbin will be as you slowly stretch yourself open with your fingers, then slowly work your new toy in. it’s not perfect, the mixture of lube and water making everything almost too slippery, but you feel like it’s the cleanest this way and the warm water drizzling from the showerhead above helping you relax the ring of muscle you usually don’t play with.

you let your free hand roam your body, pinching your chest and rubbing at your clit to make the stretch easier. it’s not difficult for you to enjoy the process of it, your stiffened bud throbbing benath your wet palm every time you pass over it, imagining changbin being the one to touch you instead.

you end up making yourself cum with the showerhead when you’ve fully worked the plug inside of you, already bordering in desperation just from thinking about how much you might be able to bring out changbin’s dominant side tonight.

you almost can’t contain yourself when changbin’s finally home, shifting in your seat all throughout casual conversations and dinner until he takes the hint and gets you into the bedroom.

you’re making out half naked now, you pressing yourself to changbin’s broad chest like a cat, whimpering when he grips your thighs to shift you closer to him.

“you’re so needy today,” changbin hums against your lips. “are you wet for me too? let me check.”

you obediently move your panties to the side and let changbin slide two of his fingers through your folds with practiced calmness, almost like he’s probing you. he lets out a satisfied groan, moving to grope your ass, just shy of where the toy is nestles inside of you and you feel your whole body jolt. changbin slowly traces your crack over your underwear, pushing down ever so slightly until he fully presses up against the plug inside of you, unknowingly shifting it a bit and making you breathlessly whisper his name.

changbin goes quiet for a second.

“what’s this?” he asks, voice rough. you just bite your bottom lip and blink up at him, coy.

“can i… ?”

you nod and changbin turns you around, bending you over the bed and yanking your panties to your ankles with one strong pull. when he sees the plug nestled between your cheeks he sucks in a breath through his teeth, using his thumb to slowly trace where your rim stretches around the unyielding material.

“i just want to you to fuck me there too. you keep telling me i’m your toy, but you don’t even want to use all my holes to play?” you pout, trying to get him riled up.

you know changbin is excited just from the way his voice pitchs when he’s asking you if it’s okay, if it’s really okay, making you laugh as you repeatedly give him your consent.

his eyes sparkle when he lays you on your back with a pillow under your hips, wasting no time to gently remove the plug from your ass - elicting a groan from the both of you when you clench around nothing - then slowly stretching you with four fingers and lots of lube, before letting you roll a condom on his straining erection, almost curling against his stomach in his anticipation of fucking your ass.

“turn around,” changbin groans, watching with heavy lidded eyes as you eagerly roll onto your stomach for him, hastily wrestling the pillow out from beneath your hips to hug it to your chest as you prop yourself up on your forearms and knees, arching your back in a complete offering of yourself to changbin.

his hands quickly find your skin again, warmly smoothing from your lower back over your behind and roaming your upper thighs before settling on your asscheeks, spreading you open just a bit as he runs his condom clad erection from your wet cunt to the prepped hole above, not pushing in yet but grinding forward further until his thighs meet the back of your legs and the entire length of his cock is resting against you, nestled between your cheeks hard and unyielding.

you feel your rim clench in anticipation, tightenig and relaxing with your heartbeat.

“relax,” changbin whispers.

“just fuck me, changbin,” you demand, whiny. “please, please, please.”

you suck in your breath through your teeth when you feel the tip of changbin’s cock breaches you, stretching out your rim for the first time with a dull, welcomed ache. he pushes in slowly but steadily, huffing and groaning under his breath while his strong hands hold you in place to make sure your tight hole takes every inch he gives you.

with your small gasps spurring him on, changbin pushes in without a break until he’s balls deep, almost whimpering your name when he bottoms out inside of your tight canal.

you always love the way changbin’s cock feels, stretching you out just right - enough to be a challenge, not enough to be a pain - but it’s so much now, the sensations foreign and slightly uncomfortable, but arousing in a way you can barely wrap your head around. something about letting changbin have your ass too, especially now that you know how much he’s been wanting this, makes it feel special - almost romantic in a way.

still, when changbin pulls back to deliver his first real thrust you lock up around him, suddenly scared of him shifting inside of you, because the movement will inevitably be followed by an uncomfortable sting.

sensing that you’re struggling, changbin stills with a grunt, giving you time to adjust.

he doesn’t move his hips, but he slowly pulls your upper body towards his front until you’re kneeling upright just like him, holding you to his chest with one arm around your throat while the other one wraps around your middle, his forehead resting against the back of your head.

“so tight, so good,” changbin groans, his hand sneaking lower and lower until his fingertips brush your sensitive clit, his gentle touch making you clench and pulse again, this time from pleasure. “fuck,” changbin curses, a hoarse shout. “fuck, you feel so nice to me. wrap around me so good, you’re made for my cock, hm?”

you whine pathetically in response. changbin palms at your cunt again, a reward and it feels mind-numbingly good, despite it being his obvious distraction from your discomfort. the slightest pressure against your clit, the feeling of being too full, the unescapable stretch of changbin taking you hole for the first time.

when your breathing evens out changbin slowly starts moving again, a careful motion that has him pulling back ever so slightly just to grind his cock forwards again with a gentle roll of his hips, the arm around your middle tightening and a grunt of your name escaping his lips when he presses himself deeper into you again.

“fuck,” he groans, iron grip forcing you close to him with no room to squirm away. “your hole’s perfect, baby.”

his enthusiasm is evident, but changbin’s still holding back, you can feel it in the way he tightly grips your hips, nails digging into your skin with a bruising force, his thighs shaking against yours, sweat building on his chest and transferring to your back despite the lack of intense movement.

“how does it feel for you?” he asks lowly, grinding his cock deep into you again.

you swallow hard, overwhelmed.

“feel so full,” you murmur. there’a still some discomfort there, but you don’t want changbin to stop, especially not now that you’re getting used to him stretching out your rim. “feels nice. feels like you own me.”

changbin hums in appreciation, rubbing slow circles around your clit with three fingers and you swear feel your pussy flooding with the next push of his cock inside of you, pulsing around nothing with quickly rising arousal.

without a warning changbin draws his fingers back and brings them down in a harsh spank to your sticky clit. you whine and clench hard, making changbin let out an almost pained groan, his hips kicking forward hard as a string of your wetness leaks from your pussy and connects from your empty hole to your squirming thigh. changbin does it again, and again, fast rhythmical smacks against your sensitive cunt that make your head spin and have you mewling with sensitivity, embarrassingly close from his harsh treatment.

then, instead of lifting them up to make it sting changbin’s finally pressing his fingers down hard onto your abused clit, rolling it around in harsh circles right after he brings down his last slap. the pressure is enougut to send you headfirst in a reeling orgasm, locking up like a vice around changbin and shaking in his hold as waves of pleasure mount and crash throughout your oversensitive body.

changbin guides you through your high, cradling you against his chest and rubbing at your clit with steady fingers until your hips try to twist away from the overstimulation.

changbin doesn’t let you go just yet, but he slowly lowers you down on all fours again, watching your face collaps into the pillow in front of you with a chuckle. you’re all relaxed now, any remnants of anxiety of changbin fucking your ass that you had left your head with the intensity of your orgasm.

changbin has always liked you the best when you’re like this, pliant and receptive after just one orgasm to butter you up.

“hold still for me,” changbin tells you, knowing you’ll do anything for him now. he’s still gripping your hips too tight, but you can’t help but enjoy the way changbin’s nails dig into your skin, his wanton demand to own you that you’ll be able to trace for the rest of the week.

changbin moves back a bit, then immediately sheathes himself back inside of you, gasping his groans mixing with your heavy breaths when he starts fucking you in earnest. he doesn’t pull back much, only managing short, powerful kicks of his hips that make him grind his cock into you deeply, babbling about how tight you feel, how good you are for him, how you’re his pretty little toy, so good, so perfect for letting him fuck you like that.

between the pace changbin’s building and his exclamations of pleasure you’re enjoying yourself even more than you expected, head positively spinning as you get lost in the pleasure of getting fucked. you barely make oht changbin’s voice when he orders you to touch your clit for him since his hands are preoccupied with holding you down in an iron grip. you weakly move the fingers of your right hand to the sensitive nub between your legs, but it’s too slippery from the way your wetness is smeared all around your cunt and you feel like you’re too sensitive to cum again anyways. you’re unable to overstimulate yourself like changbin usually does, like tells you to now.

“i can’t,” you whine. “s’too much.”

changbin unceremoniously puts one hand flat on the middle of your back pushing you down in an uncomfortable arch as you keeep your ass up for him, the fingers of his other hand finding your clit again.

“i have to do everything for you, hm? such a good toy for me, fuck, but you don’t even know how to play with yourself, h-huh?”

he possessivelyn cups your sensitive pussy in his palm, your clit overly sensitive from the combination not getting as much attention from changbin as it usually would while simultaneously still feeling overstimulated from your last orgasm just minutes ago.

without another warning changbin’s rubbing you just gentle enough to not be considered harsh, moving over your sensitive bundle of nerves from left to right and back again with rough fingers until it gets too much and he’s flinging you into your second high that has your ass pulsing around his cock while your pussy violently clenches and releases around nothing, your stringy arousal leaking from your empty hole over the tips of changbins fingers and into his palm.

changbin freezes up when you tighten around his cock, making him groan and shudder behind you, but he still doesn’t cum.

“fuck,” he groans, when an unexpected aftershock makes you convulse around his cock again, strained and close to his own breaking point, but determined to draw it out for the both of you.

changbin slowly slots his body over yours until his chest presses to your back, not moving his hips just yet even when he’s crouching over you completely, his lips only centimeters away from your ear.

“you came so hard, baby. you like me destroying your ass that much? will you even let me fuck your pussy too?”

you nod weakly, wet cunt positively throbbing at the thought of feeling him inside your other hole too.

changbin straightens himself up again, pulling his cock from your asshole slowly, then hastily taking the condom off. this is well explored territory and changbin knows how much you can take, so he fucks into your unstretched, leaking cunt without restraint, three of his fingers circling around the now stretched out rim of your ass thrusting in time with the movement of his cock, claiming both of your holes at the same time. his free hand moves from a grip on your hips to spanking your asscheeks back around you to tease your clit again, making you moan high and breathless as every nerve ending fizzles with burning hot, all consuming pleasure.

changbin’s almost feral now, hard cock pistoning in and out of your cunt at an unforgiving pace, rolling your clit around with his fingers. you’re struggling to get used to the overwhelming stimulation despite the abundance of your wetness that forms a ring around the bottom of his cock - you love that he’s so crazy for you now, addicted to the way he’s addicted to you and losing your own mind at the sensations he’s making you feel.

changbin sounds delirious when he cums with a shout only minutes later. you don’t fare much better, drooling and crying with the intensity of him filling you up while he’s ruining both of your holes, body shaking weakly when another wave of pleasure engulfs you.

when you’ve caught your breath a bit, changbin slowly retreats, rolling onto his back with a breathless chuckle.

“thank you for this treat. you’re going to be the death of me,” changbin pants, gently pulling you onto his broad chest, placing a soft kiss to your temple and his hand moving to rub at your lower body when you wince from sensitivity. “did i go to hard on you?”

“no, no, you were perfect,” you sigh. “but do not expect to get another go at my ass tomorrow.”

It had been a pretty typical morning for you so far. You had woken up a little down but you struggled with depression and anxiety so that wasn’t abnormal for you. You were adamant that you weren’t going to let it control your day today though. You tidied up around you and Chan’s apartment that you had shared together for about two months now and then you washed up, got dressed, and got ready to leave to run a few errands. You decided to make a little lunch for Chan and stop by work to see him while you were out getting things done. Knowing him if you didn’t take him lunch, he wouldn’t stop to eat until dinner time or even later. So, with his lunch in hand, you left your apartment building. You decided to walk since everything you had to do was fairly close together. You were also hoping the exercise and sunshine might help elevate your mood a bit before you saw Chan.

You dropped the mail off at the post, stopped by the little boutique Chan liked and got the shampoo and conditioner that he’d run out of, dropped some books you had read at the neighborhood book share box, and then headed towards Chan’s studio. When you walked into the building where Chan worked you went up to the front desk and flashed your ID at the girl behind the counter that was more than acquainted with your face at this point, then signed in before heading to the elevators. When the elevator doors opened you and quite a few other people got on. You weren’t the best at being in such close proximity to strangers, it made you incredibly nervous so by the time you got to the floor Chan’s studio was on you were a little antsy again. You took a few deep breaths as you walked down the hall. Once you were at Chan’s door you took one more deep breath before you tapped lightly on it. It only took a minute for the door to open and you were met with moppy hair, a huge smile, and chubby cheeks.

“Hey Y/N! I didn’t know you were coming by today!” Jisung said as he moved aside to allow you to enter.

“It’s a surprise, I brought Chan some lunch.” You walked in and at the sound of his name Chan turned around and saw you standing there holding a lunch box and bottle of water. A smile spread across his entire face but as happy as he was you couldn’t help but notice how exhausted he looked. He was pale and his eyes were dark, his curls a bit unruly, and his lips were a little raw from him chewing at them while worrying and concentrating on whatever track him and the guys had been working on all this time. He stood up and walked over to you, grabbing the lunch box and water and giving you a quick peck on the lips. He sat the food down on his desk and then turned back and pulled you in for a proper hug and kiss to thank you for the sweet gesture.

“Thank you, baby girl.” He planted another, more lingering kiss on your lips and Jisung made a dramatic puke face.

“Gross I’m out. I’ll be back after lunch!” Chan laughed as he stood there with his arms around you his hands resting on your back.

“Alright Ji I’ll see you after bit man.” Jisung smiled and winked at you and made his way out of the studio leaving the two of you alone. Once Jisung was gone Chan leaned in and gave you a deeper kiss than before. He pulled you tight against his body and traced the tip of his tongue along your bottom lip before sliding it across yours. You ran your fingers through his messy curls as your tongues teased each other, earning a low groan from your boyfriend. Chan’s hands traveled from your back down to grab your hands full your ass and squeeze but you had to tut him because this was not what you had intended when you came to see him at work.

“Channie…” His lips refused to leave yours as you called him.

“Mmmhm.. Cha.. mmhhm…Channieeee.” Your hands came to rest against the firm pectoral muscles of his chest and you lightly pushed at him and laughed. When his lips finally parted from yours, he looked at you giving you a pouty face.

“Oh, now don’t give me that face. I came here to bring you lunch not to…” You gestured between the two of you to get your point across and Chan smirked.

“Not to fuck me?” Blush started creeping up your neck at his blunt words.

“Yes precisely.” You tried to sound unbothered, like his words didn’t have an effect on you. You were certain you didn’t succeed because Chan ducked his head down and started kissing your neck as he continued to knead your ass in his hands.

“I just want to properly thank you baby girl.” His voice was low as he spoke, his lips lingering close to your skin. You braced yourself against his chest and he nibbled at a particularly ticklish spot, you let out another little laugh. You were melting under his hands and lips as usual and you were starting to lose this battle that you weren’t sure you really wanted to win in the first place. Just as you felt Chan sink his teeth into the crook of your neck and shoulder and run his tongue along the bite, just as you were finally giving in to the temptation that was your gorgeous boyfriend, Changbin walked into the studio.

“OH SHIT! Uh… sorry to uh… interrupt. The door was unlocked.” You pushed Chan off you. Your face was beet red, your heart racing, embarrassed. You tried to explain.

“No uh.. it’s okay Bin we weren’t…” If possible, your face burned even hotter as your words caught in your throat. You could feel your heart beat in your ears.

“I mean I… uh I was just about to go get a coffee. Do you want coffee?” Changbin couldn’t help the small smile that crept on his face at your flustered state, being caught in a somewhat compromising position with Chan but he didn’t want to make you more uncomfortable so he let it go instead of teasing.

“No thank you Y/N I’m good.” You turned to Chan who, at first was grinning like the cat that caught the canary but when he saw the look on your face, how anxious and uncomfortable you seemed his face turned serious. He grabbed your hand and ran his thumb along the back of it.

“Hey, are you alright?” You nodded and forced a smile.

“Yea you and Changbin do your thing. I’m just gonna get a little air and grab some coffee and then I’ll come back and sit with you while you eat your lunch, okay?” Chan looked at you for a minute and after you gave him another tight smile he shook his head, leaned in, and kissed your cheek.

“Okay baby, if you’re sure.” You nodded again and excused yourself as you walked past Changbin who moved aside giving you an apologetic smile. Once you were out of the small studio you didn’t feel like you were suffocating quite so much. You made your way down to the lobby and out of the building taking a deep breath of air in once you were outside. Your racing heart was starting to slow back down and you started to walk towards the café that was just a little down the block. You got your coffee quickly and headed straight back so that Chan wasn’t waiting to eat any longer than he already had. When you had made it back you noticed the studio door was cracked so you went to walk in without knocking this time but before you could, you over heard Chan and Changbin talking.

“God, I have been so stressed lately. I’m just completely exhausted. I feel like I’m about at my breaking point man.” It was Chan speaking. You waited to go in and listened more. You knew he looked tired and if he was admitting it then he had to be bad. It stressed you out to no end and you worried about him, about his health.

“There’s just so much going on. Performances, producing, photo shoots, fan signs, work in general you know and then home.” You held your breath at the mention of home and Chan continued.

“Just the move, we’re still getting all the way settled, which causes stress, and Y/N has needed a bit more attention because of it. You know new environment, change, it’s hard, she’s been having a lot of anxiety issues and with everything else it’s a lot sometimes but she is trying…” His words gave you a sudden sharp pain in your heart. You backed away from the door as you felt tears stinging your eyes. You were on the list of things that were stressing him out. You were supposed to be taking away from that list not adding to it.

You did have panic attacks a lot, especially recently. Because you didn’t like the way your medicine made you feel you often wouldn’t take it until the panic attack was already on top of you. When you were in the middle of particularly bad ones Chan always made sure you were okay enough for him to run and grab your pills before he left you, coming back with your meds and some juice. When you would calm down enough to stand being touched again, he would hold you, run his fingers through your hair and hum a quiet song, sometimes you knew it and sometimes it was just his own. If Chan wasn’t dealing with that it was your low lows. When you went into an active depressive state it would take hours of him trying to get you out of bed. Bribing you with food that you loved that didn’t sound appetizing or walks by the river that were usually one of your favorite things to do with Chan. If that didn’t work usually, he could get you to agree to sit up and drink water at least. He was good at convincing you things were really easier than what they seemed to you. So, once you were up drinking it was easier to get you to say yes to ramen and movies on the couch and eventually after a day or two, Chan would pull you back up from the chasm you’d fallen into.

He did ALL that for you plus everything else he’d just named and MORE! You were on the list, not helping take away from it. Instead of going into the studio you backed away and turned back towards the elevator. The tears in your eyes starting to roll down your cheeks as you waited for the elevator to open. Just as the doors opened you saw Jisung coming through from the stair well at the other end of the hall. When he saw you, he flashed you his mega-watt smile.

“Hey Y/N you leaving already? I haven’t gotten to see you yet.” You quickly put your head down pretending you didn’t see or hear him, not wanting Jisung to see you crying. You didn’t want him to know you were upset, if he saw you crying then Chan would know and he’d worry and would want to know why and… if you didn’t get out of there now you were going to panic. You hurried into the elevator as soon as the doors were all the way open and started pressing the close door button immediately. When you didn’t answer Jisung, at first, he thought maybe you didn’t hear him. He thought you had seen him but he was far enough away that maybe he was wrong. He started jogging down to the elevator so he could see you quickly before you left. You started to calm down when you saw the doors first starting to close but just as they closed a little further, Jisung’s face appeared. You looked up wide eyed, shocked to see him at the elevator already when he had been so far down the hall before. When he saw you tears streaked your face and the smile that was on his fell just as the doors closed. Alone in the elevator you took deep breaths trying to calm both your panic and crying. When the doors opened again you quickly made your way through the lobby and out of the building. You started towards yours and Chan’s apartment as fast as possible dead set on what you had just decided.

Jisung was confused, were you crying? What happened? He walked down to the studio and walked in finding Chan and Changbin acting totally normal, still talking, now about the track they had all been working on. Jisung squinted his eyes at them, his tongue poked out a bit, and he hiked his thumb back.

“I just saw Y/N by the elevators…” Chan smiled when Jisung said your name.

“Oh, she must be back from getting her coffee is she right behind you?” Jisung shook his head and Changbin noticed the slightly uneasy look on Jisung’s face.

“No, she was getting in the elevator she, she looked like she was crying.” Chan’s smile fell from his face. Had the incident with Changbin shaken you up more than he’d realized? He grabbed his phone and tried to call you but you didn’t answer. He decided to give you a bit, maybe you actually were more upset about the Changbin thing than he’d thought and you just wanted to get home. Chan waited until he thought you should be back at the apartment and tried calling again but still no answer. He waited a few minutes in between and tried to call a couple more times, then he texted you. ‘Hey are you okay? Jisung said you were leaving and looked upset. Do you need me?’

 Your phone rang again. You didn’t look at it, you knew who it was and you had no intention of answering it. You couldn’t, not when you knew he would just coax you into spilling out everything that was wrong, talk you out of what you had to do. The caring, selfless person that he was, he would tell you everything that he knew you needed to hear and he would talk you down to his own detriment, because you would still be on the list of things that added to his stress. You heard your phone ding with a text notification. You picked it up to see what Chan had said. ‘Hey are you okay? Jisung said you were leaving and looked upset. Do you need me?’

Do you need me? Your heart hurt. But you would still be on the list of things that added to his stress. You hit the button on the side of your phone making the screen go black and put it in your pocket before throwing the last of the clothes you needed into your suit case and zipping it closed. You went out into the living room and you sat at the desk you kept in the corner. You opened the middle drawer, pulled out a piece of paper and a pen and started writing. The tears were back in your eyes more prevalent than before, fat drops falling from your nose to the page making the ink bleed a little where they hit. You tried to write as clearly as possible through your tear blurred vision. When you were done you folded it, put it in an envelope, and wrote Chan’s name on the outside of it before bringing it to your lips and kissing it. You set it down on the living room table, grabbed your suit case and left even though it shattered your heart to do so. But you wouldn’t be on the list of things that added to his stress.

Back at the studio Chan was REALLY starting to worry it had been about thirty minutes since Jisung had seen you leaving. “Guys if she doesn’t call or text in the next fifteen minutes, I’m going to check on her.” Changbin and Jisung nodded in understanding. Jisung had anxiety too so knew better than anyone how it was when you felt like the world was closing in on you and you couldn’t control your bodies response. The feeling of losing control only added to the panic you already felt which added and so on until you spiraled and shut down or screamed. Chan understood that sometimes when it was like that you needed space to come back to your senses BUT sometimes you needed help coming back, someone to ground you. Chan was trying to be a good boyfriend by doing what he could, by treading the line of giving you space to sort things out and going to check on you to see if you needed help. When it was rounding the forty-minute mark Chan was getting fidgety. It only took twenty minutes to walk home and if you were upset surly that would be where you would go. As soon as the hand on the clock hit the fifteen-minute mark Chan had set, he sprung up from his chair to start towards your apartment.

“Let us know what’s up hyung!” Changbin called out and Chan was out the door with a wave in reply. Chan did his best not to sprint the whole way to the apartment but by the time he got there he was sweating, curls sticking to his forehead, and his chest was heaving from the exertion. He unlocked and burst through the door of your apartment calling out to you immediately and getting no response. He checked the kitchen and living room quickly and then made his way down the hall, checking the guest room, the office, the bathroom and finally your shared bedroom. You weren’t anywhere in the apartment and now Chan was really panicking. What if you’d gotten hurt? What if something happened to you? Chan pulled out his phone and called you again. Straight to voicemail. His heart sank. He couldn’t put his finger on one exact reason but he knew something was terribly wrong. He ran back out to the living room and a white envelope on the table, that he hadn’t seen before, caught his eye. He picked it up and saw his name written on the outside in your beautifully delicate handwriting. Now his heart was in his throat and he thought he might throw up. His hands shook as he opened the envelope, pulled out the letter and began to read.

Channie,

I just can’t stay and do this to you anymore. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for any pain I have caused you. Just know that this is for the best. It’s what’s best. I know it may not seem like it now and it doesn’t seem fair that we didn’t get goodbye but I knew if I waited. If I stayed for goodbye, that I wouldn’t do it and I have to. I have to leave. Promise to take care of yourself and to be happy. You deserve all of the happiness and peace in the world and I hope you find it. I love you Chan, I always will.

       Always yours,

  Y/N  

Chan choked out a sob and crumpled the letter in his hands as he sank down on the couch and cried.  What did you mean it was what was best? Always yours? How can that be if you’re gone? Chan curled up there on the couch with your letter and cried until he fell asleep from exhaustion. When Changbin and Jisung never heard from Chan they decided to go check on you both. It was dark by the time they reached the apartment and from the looks of it, it seemed like all the lights were off. They debated whether to go or to knock but decided they were already there, so they went ahead and knocked on the door.

Chan woke up to the sound of their knocking. His eyes were heavy, difficult to open because they were so swollen from sleeping and crying but he managed to squint and walk his way to the front door with your letter still clutched in his hand. Maybe it was you. Maybe you had come back. When he opened the door, he put up his hand to block his face, blinded by the hall lights for a minute.

When Chan's vision came back, he moved his hand and saw Jisung and Changbin standing there. The small bit of hope fell from his face and his heart broke again. He had been half asleep and not thinking. They were knocking, why would YOU be knocking. You would have walked in. You would have woken him from the couch and scolded him for not sleeping in bed. You would have kissed him all the way to your room before making love and falling asleep in his arms. You wouldn’t have knocked, of course it wasn’t you. When the guys saw Chan, they both immediately could tell something was definitely not right.

“What’s going on? What’s wrong?” Jisung was able to blurt out first. Chan’s broad shoulders were slunk down and even though he’d gotten a few hours of sleep he looked absolutely terrible.

“She’s gone.” Was all he could choke out. He held out your letter as the tears welled and fell from his eyes again. Changbin grabbed the crunched-up piece of paper from Chan and his eyes started scanning it. He frowned at the tear-soaked page, looked at Jisung, and shook his head.

You got a hold of to an old school friend that lived in the country and they offered to let you with them for a while. You thought maybe you needed some time in the quiet, maybe if you were far enough away it wouldn’t hurt so much. Instead, once you got there, you ended up turning your phone off, closing the curtains, getting into bed and staying there. Your friends gave you a couple days before they intervened but no matter how hard your friends tried they couldn’t get you to get up out of bed. Two weeks of practically force -feeding you ramen, crackers, and water, willing you to get up one of the days each week and at least shower, which you begrudgingly did so. Finally, you managed to drag yourself out of the bed on your own. It wasn’t easy and you were still unbearably sad but you got yourself up and dressed. Baby steps.

The first couple days you stuck close to the farm house. You did dishes and cleaned up some to try and make up for what you had put your friends through the last couple of weeks. Having been in bed so long after a couple days around the house, you started to get a little stir crazy. So, you went on a walk. About a mile or so up the road from the house there was a field of tall grass and wild flowers. Each day that week you went on a walk to that field. You would look out at it and think about Chan. You would day dream about old memories of you two together and wonder what he was doing right then and then when you couldn’t take your own thoughts any more you would go back to the house. Finally, one day when you got to your field instead of just standing there, you actually walked into it. You ran your hands over the tops of the tall grass and went through picking a few of the wild flowers here and there. Some that you thought were pretty, some that you thought Chan would think were pretty, until you had a bouquet of the random flowers. The sun was warm and when you walked through the field it felt good to air out and breathe in the beautiful smell of the flowers. Yet still despite that your heart still felt like it was made of iron. It was so heavy in your chest. You made your way back to your friend’s house.

When you got to the farm house you put the flowers you had picked into a vase you found and decided it was time to turn on your phone and try and get back to the real world. Time to figure what normal was going be for you now. When you turned on your phone, as expected, all of the texts and missed call notifications from the last 3 weeks came pouring in, most of which were Chan but there were also some from other friends and the guys also checking in on you. You looked at the first few texts Chan sent. All of what you saw of them was him pleading for you to come back and talk to him. To tell him what was wrong. Why you left. Where are you? Are you okay? You stopped reading and deleted the rest. You looked at a few from your other friends and some from the guys and then you marked all as read and put your phone in your pocket. Just as you did it started to ring. Surprised, you grabbed it and looked at the screen seeing Felix’s name and the picture you had of him grinning ear to ear. The corner of your mouth turned up a little seeing his bright smile as you contemplated and then decided to swipe and answer. When Felix heard the click of the phone picking up, he was elated. He, as well as the others and especially Chan, had all been trying to call you for weeks to no avail. When he heard your voice, he about burst.

“Hello? Lix?” You sounded drained, but it was really you. He didn’t mean to but his all his words starting coming out like vomit.

“Oh my god! Y/N! Are you okay? Where are you? Do you need me to come get you? Are you safe?” You had to interrupt him to get a word in to answer the questions he had already spewed out at you.

“I’m okay Lix. I’m with some of my old school friends. I am safe don’t worry.” Felix huffed a half laugh incredulously.

“Don’t worry!? It’s been weeks we’ve all been worried sick Y/N, especially Chan, he…” You cut Felix off again.

“Don’t. I… don’t tell me. I know okay. I just I did what I felt like was the right thing, what I KNEW was the right thing.” Felix didn’t understand. From what he’d heard about that day from the guys, there wasn’t anything that would warrant you leaving so abruptly like that.

“Why though? Why do you think that?” You let out a long sigh. It was a lot to get into on the phone and Felix realized that.

“Look come have lunch with me tomorrow please? Talk to me.” You were unsure if you were ready to do that. You didn’t know if you’d be able to talk about it and you weren’t sure if you were ready to see any of the guys yet. You knew you couldn’t see Chan. You wouldn’t. Felix could sense your apprehension even over the phone.

“Please Y/N, just lunch, just with me. I’ll meet you in the lobby at work.” You took a deep breath and decided to agree under one condition.

“Okay Lix, just you, just lunch, and I’ll meet you outside the building. I don’t want to risk running into Chan while I’m there. It won’t help anything.” Felix agreed to your terms.

“Okay Y/N. 2pm tomorrow, okay?”

“Yes, I’ll see you tomorrow Lix.” He gave you a little hum.

“Take care of yourself Y/N. I’ll see you tomorrow.” After you hung up with Felix you started to gather your things from around the farm house. You hugged your friends, and thanked them profusely for allowing you to stay there and for helping you. Of course they were happy to, they loved you just the same as they always had. Even if you didn’t get to see each other as often as before, they would always love you and be there for you and they made sure you knew that before you grabbed your suitcase and headed back towards the city.

It was night by the time you got back. You got a room and immediately crashed, all the emotions of the day, the weeks really, catching up to you. You fell into the big soft bed in your hotel room and drifted to sleep quickly. The next morning you woke up groggy. You may have fallen asleep easily but you had nightmares all night and it was not a restful sleep. You got up and showered, got dressed and fuddled around until it was time to meet Felix. You were outside of the building, like you had agreed, at five till two. You texted Felix to let him know you were there and then you waited. After about ten minutes he texted you back.

‘I’m so sorry! I’m running behind finishing something up. Can you meet me up in the practice room?’ Your heart started racing. You didn’t want to even risk going into the building let alone up to the same floor as Chan’s studio. You text Felix back.

‘Lix please just meet me down here. I told you… I can’t.’ Your chest felt tight and your tried to do your breathing. Your text notification went off again.

‘I’m the only one here. It won’t take me too long but you shouldn’t wait out on the street for me. Just come up. Please?’ You let out an exasperated sigh but decided if you weren’t at risk of running into Chan then it should be okay. You went into the building and walked up to the same counter as usual, with the same girl sitting behind it. It had been quite a while since she’d seen you last and she looked a little surprised but regardless, you flashed your ID and signed in before heading for the elevator and to the practice room where Felix was.

So, Felix might have fibbed just a little. He was alone in the practice room but Chan was there in his studio working, or at least trying to. He hadn’t been able to do much of anything the last three weeks that you had been gone. Knowing that, Felix made sure to do what he could to convince Chan to go to work that day. You stepped off the elevator and looked down the hall opposite of Chan’s studio, towards the practice room, searching for Felix. Then you heard the familiar squeak of Chan’s studio door opening from behind you. You froze. When you finally made yourself turn around and look, you saw Chan walking out and your heart crumbled to dust. He looked even worse than the last time you’d seen him. His eyes puffy, worry lines more prominent on his face, he looked pale and gaunt. He clearly had not been eating or sleeping well. His eyes scanned up from his feet and met your figure standing there in the hall. He stood there expressionless for a moment. He was certain he had finally slipped into delirium from lack of sleep. He rubbed his eyes and opened them again. You were still there. Felix hadn’t told Chan he’d spoken to you or that he was supposed to be having lunch with you that day. So, when Chan saw you standing there and he realized you weren’t a walking day dream, he was in shock. Then he was angry. He was relieved to see you of course. Beside himself knowing that you were safe, although you looked like you had been through hell yourself the last few weeks. Still, he couldn’t help the anger that bubbled inside along with all of his other emotions. You saw him make a b line for you and you bounced on the balls of your feet nervously. When he was there, right in front of you, you couldn’t bring yourself to look at his face. He looked so angry walking up to you. You stared at the floor trying to get words to come out but they kept dying on the tip of your tongue.

“Chan… I…” Was all you could manage. Chan didn’t say anything. He just gently grabbed your hand and pulled you towards his studio. Once you both were in the room Chan closed and locked the door. Now that you were able to speak privately. Chan spun around to face you unable to hold back his emotions anymore and they came out in the form of rage.

“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?! YOU JUST LEFT ME! HOW COULD YOU JUST LEAVE ME LIKE THAT Y/N?!” His face was red and he had huge tears welling up in his big brown eyes. You were speechless. He had never even raised his voice in anger in front of you, he had certainly NEVER yelled at YOU like that before. You didn’t know what to say. You stood there stunned.

“ANSWER ME!” He yelled again the veins in his forehead and neck becoming more prominent the angrier he got. You jumped and choked on your words as you too started to cry. You managed to swallow the lump in your throat and form the words to answer him.

“I couldn’t stay knowing that I was hurting you, that I was holding you down.” You sobbed out and Chan’s face fell. He didn’t yell again but his voice was still serious laced with confusion.

“What are you talking about?” You bit at your lips nervously trying to keep yourself from slipping into a panic attack. You took a deep shuddering breath.

“That day… I over heard you and Changbin talking…” Chan didn’t understand. He racked his brain trying to remember him and Changbin’s conversation. What he could have said that would make you think that you were doing any of those things to him. You continued.

“You were talking about how tired and stressed you were with work, home….” You choked on another sob.

“Me. I couldn’t… I couldn’t stay knowing that I was adding to that. That I was another piece of your life that was wearing you down instead of building you up, supporting you. I couldn’t Chan…. I couldn’t….” You gasped trying to get enough air and calm down as you started to shake and cry harder and Chan finally realized what you were talking about. His anger started melting away and he took a step closer to you, reaching out to pull you into his embrace, which only made you sob harder against him.

“Baby, I… I didn’t mean it like that. You do support me, you add to the joy in my life not the pain, don’t you see that?” You shook your head against his chest. You couldn’t.

“Y…you just always have to deal with so much and then on top of that you are always helping me when I’m anxious or having lows. I don’t help. I’m whittling away at you Chan. I’m not good for you.” Chan took your face into his hands gently and made you look at him.

“Listen to me do you understand?! You absolutely do NOT whittle away from me do you hear me? You make me whole Y/N. You being with me has made me the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. I will always comfort you when you need it, helping you through your lows and your fears, it’s not a burden to me. It is the hardest way I know how to love you.” Chan held your face firmly so you couldn’t look away, though you tried. You looked into his eyes and you saw that he truly meant what he said. There was not an ounce of doubt or dishonesty in what he was telling you.

“No matter what, the one thing that’s always there, the one constant for BOTH of us, is that we have each other. You’re it for me Y/N, always got that? Always. Promise me baby, promise me you will never leave me like that again.” Tears were streaking Chan’s face and yours. You had never heard Chan say anything like that before. You knew he loved you but he had never so been so outright about saying he saw forever with you. Your bottom lip quivered and you shook your head as tears continued to stream from your eyes. His smile spread all the way to his eyes, his hands still cupping your face, he pulled you in and kissed you. His fingers gently grazed your face as you shared the sweet kiss. Your hands pressed against his chest, stabilizing yourself. Lightheaded from the surge of different emotions, or Chan’s kiss, or both. Chan pulled away, wrapping his arms around your waist and rested his head against yours. You looked into each-others eyes and then he kissed you again, more passionately. Chan started walking you back towards the couch. He sat down and pulled you to sit on top of him your legs straddling his lap. His lips traveled, down your jaw to your neck and he gently kissed and licked the spots he knew made you weak while his hands roamed your body over your clothes. Your skin started to burn under his touch even through the clothes. It was so much so fast you weren’t sure what was going on or if it should be. You pulled away and put your hands against Chan’s shoulders stopping him.

“Chan…” He could hear the uncertainty in your voice. His hands came up to cup your face again, your own falling to your sides as he looked at you with his endless brown eyes. He kissed you softly, his pouty full lips gently pressed to yours, pulling away he met your eyes again.

“Baby girl, I missed you so much.” Another tender kiss placed by his plump lips. They hovered over yours, both of your eyes closed.

“It’s okay baby.” His voice was a whisper. Another kiss, deeper than the last and his hands started traveling from your face down your neck, finger tips brushing gently as Chan’s hands came to rest against your breasts over your shirt and you couldn’t help but lean into his touch. You were breathless panting against his lips, he parted from yours again only enough to form words.

“It’s okay… it’s okay. Let me take care of you baby girl. Let me make love to you.” Chan’s head dipped and his lips pressed against and softly sucked at the pulse point on your neck while gently squeezing your breasts together. You rested your hands against his firm abs as his hands moved from your breasts to your waist, pulling you closer to him. You slid over his lap and suddenly you could feel Chan’s erection underneath you, pressing against your already sensitive pussy. His eyes closed and a soft pant left him with the new pressure against his cock, his warm breath ghosted your neck. Your hands slid up Chan’s chest and rested on his broad shoulders and you pressed your core down more firmly against his hard on, sliding over his lap again. This time Chan let out a grunt and his hips jerked up searching for even more friction. Chan’s hands continued moving lower past your waist, until he was lightly gripping your ass, urging you to continue moving while he thrusted up into your jean covered cunt. Chan’s mouth was on yours again peppering kisses against your jaw before claiming your lips yet again. Grinding against his cock while he devoured your lips had you soaking wet you could feel the fabric of your panties starting to stick to you. You applied a little pressure to Chan’s shoulders with your palms and stopped him again. He quickly did so, pulling away and looking at you tenderly, breathless. You bit at your bottom lip, your face flushed and your eyes blown with lust. Chan didn’t think you could look more beautiful. You were always beautiful but especially so right now like that. Your hands came up and you ran your fingers through his curls. Chan closed his eyes at the gentle contact. Your hands traced down his face and cupped his jaw. You stopped and he opened his eyes looking at you again. You leaned in and kissed him this time.

“I need you Chan. Please.” His lips quickly found yours again as he nodded. You quickly stood up off of Chan’s lap and started taking your pants and panties off while Chan frantically pulled his shirt off over his head exposing his chiseled torso before working at removing his pants, lifting his hips and pulling his pants and boxer briefs down his legs together. Before he could get them all the way off you were back on his lap, gripping his shoulders again, your bare wet pussy already grazing his throbbing cock. Chan lost what little control he had left. He pushed your shirt up enough to expose your breasts, wrapped his arms around your midsection and pulled you close enough to latch on to one of your nipples sucking it between his pouty lips and into his wet mouth. His tongue danced over it before he moved to give your other breast the same treatment. He started placing kisses back up your chest and neck before tasting your lips again. His one arm stayed wrapped around your waist holding you in place as his other hand gripped his dick and pushed into your soaked heat. When you felt the tip of Chan’s cock inside you, you sat all the way down on him, taking him whole until you could feel his balls pressed against your ass, feeling the slight sting and delicious stretch he gave you. Chan’s head rolled back and his eyes closed as he fervently chewed at his bottom lip trying to not bust his nut already. With his head still back and eyes still closed, his hands guided your hips to slowly start moving your wet cunt over his length.

“That’s it baby, fuck you feel so tight. Real slow like that for me okay?” You complied and continued to slowly rock back and forth on Chan’s throbbing dick, your palms pressed into his chest for leverage as your knees dug into the couch on either side of his legs. When Chan was finally able to open his eyes and look back up at you, you leaned down and kissed him. Your tongues fighting for dominance as you started to fuck yourself faster on his thick cock. Chan’s hips started thrusting up finding your rhythm quickly helping to work you towards your climax.

“Mmm yes Channie, god that feels so fucking good.” You moaned out as you rode him harder, your hands gripping the back of his neck and hair. You both fucked like that for what seemed like forever. Hips bucking into each other your clit rubbing against the firm muscles directly over his cock as you rubbed your ground your pussy against his hips, his hands gripping, squeezing, and kneading your ass as he urged you to keep moving on top of him. You were so wet now you were dripping down Chan’s balls. You could feel your climax approaching fast, Chan could too. When he felt your walls begin to flutter around his dick, he wrapped his arms firmly around your midsection again.

“Hold on baby girl.” He warned you just before he lifted his hips and you off the couch and started fucking up into you hard and fast. You fell forward catching yourself on the back of the couch, your breasts bouncing in Chan’s face as he continued to pound into your cunt. The sopping wet sound his balls that were soaked in your juices made was pornographic as they made contact with your ass every time he pushed his cock deeper inside you. Chan put one of his hands in the middle of your back and  and the other between your shoulder blades and pulled you down on top of him the rest of the way. He held your firm against him as he pumped his length in and out of you at an almost inhuman pace.  Chan looked up at you on top of him taking his whole cock, a moaning mess as your hair hung down and your soft breasts pressed against his firm chest. He pecked your lips sweetly as he continued to fuck you raw.

“Come on baby, cum for me cum for me beautiful.” He whispered against your lips pecking them in between. You wrapped your arms around Chan’s head threading your fingers through his hair and pulling as your orgasm tore through your body.

“Fuck! Yes Chan! Oh.. Oh my god yes!” You held on to your fists full of Chan’s hair as he continued to fuck you through your climax, coming shortly after you. You let out a soft whimper as you felt Chan’s cum paint your insides while you started to come down from the buzzing in your head.

“That’s my girl, mmm, you take my cum so well baby, you’re so pretty.” He praised you as he pumped his cock into you a couple of more times pushing his cum deep inside you before stilling. Holding you close, his dick still buried inside you. Chan lowed his hips and you down to the floor in front of the couch. You sat there straddling him, your arms wrapped around each other, faces tucked into each-others necks warm puffs of breath exchanged between the two of you, as Chan started to soften inside you. One of Chan’s hands rested on your thigh rubbing gentle circles into your skin as his other hand ran through your hair and down your back, while placing soft kisses on your neck and shoulder. You sat there and held Chan so tight, as you still trembled from your orgasm. You held him like if you loosened your grip on him that he might disappear and then tears started to prick your eyes and fall. Chan felt a warm wet drop hit his shoulder and he pulled you back to see you crying.

“Hey hey hey, baby girl. What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” You shook your head as Chan swiped at your tears.

“It’s nothing I’m… I’m just… I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry. I love you so much Chan.” Chan smiled as his heart burst. He kissed your cheeks where your tears had just been wiped away and then pulled you close and held you against his chest.

“Don’t cry baby. It’s all okay now. I love you too. Don’t cry.” Chan sat there cuddling you and running his fingers over your skin, through your hair, soothing you for a good while like that. Finally, Chan got up, lifting you with him, and sat you down on the couch. He pulled his pants and underwear up from his ankles and then helped you clean up and get dressed too. After you both were fully dressed again, Chan slid his hand into yours, weaving your fingers together. You looked up at him and smiled and he kissed your forehead.

When you heard the knock at your door you wondered who the hell it could possibly be. It was eleven o’clock at night, you were already in your pajamas and you weren’t expecting anybody. You were apprehensive about checking but the knocking persisted. You got up and grabbed the Louisville slugger you kept behind the front door. You quietly unlocked the dead bolt, removed the chain, and cracked the door just enough to look out, holding the bat tightly in one hand. You immediately recognize the man at your door. You let out a heavy sigh, lowered the bat, and swung the door open the rest of the way.

Warnings: MDNI 18+ ONLY! Oral sex (M&F receiving), thigh riding, piv intercourse (condom used look at me) cum eating, hair pulling (just a little), overstimulation (both, just a little), praise/pet names (princess/baby etc.) bit of strength kink, reader is a little bit of a switch if you squint. As always if I forget something please feel free to let me know so I can add it.

“Jesus Christ Bin you scared the fucking shit out of me.” Changbin stood there in a nice suit looking slightly disheveled, hair a little messy and wavy, the way you liked it most. His jacket folded over his shoulder and the top few buttons of his shirt were undone, a few more than he would typically have and you could see a glimpse of the smooth skin of his pecs. He was wide eyed with his hands up, looking down at the bat in your hand.

“Woah whoa there princess, no need for violence. I come in peace!” You rolled your eyes and set the baseball bat down behind the door again.

“Well, I wasn’t expecting anyone. You could have called or text to say you were coming by. Didn’t you have a date? What are you even doing here?” Changbin put his arms down and gave you that smirk. The one you loved because it made your heart flutter when he looked at you like that, the one you hated because it made your heart flutter when he looked at you like that.

“Aren’t you going to invite me in?” You nodded and moved aside, opening the door further so Changbin could come in. Once he cleared the door way you shut it and lead him towards your living room. When you turned around facing Changbin again he was looking you up and down, his eyebrow quirked a little. You looked down and remembered pajamas for the night were a spaghetti strap and shorts that were little more than underwear really. You started to blush with Changbin’s eyes on you like that, the heat radiating to your core. You cleared your throat to get a hold of yourself and tried to cover yourself a bit. It seemed to also snap Changbin out of his stare down of your body.

“I SAID I wasn’t expecting company.” You grumbled at him trying to push down the feelings you were having being alone, at night, wearing very little, with the man of your dreams, that just also happened to be one of your best friends and he looked so good. His tailer did his job well. The way his white shirt hugged him just enough to know Changbin worked very hard on the body underneath, the way his slacks complimented his ass and thighs. You shook your head trying to remove the thoughts as if they were an etch-e-sketch in your brain.

“What are you doing here Bin?” You were able to finally spit out words. Changbin pushed his bottom lip out and pouted as he walked over to your couch, threw down his jacket and sank down into the cushions. You followed and sat next to him. He laid his head back against the back of the couch and then looked over at you.

“I did have a date tonight.” You had known, still, it made your chest feel tight hearing him say it. He looked back up at your ceiling.

“Ugh! It seemed to be going well enough. Okay maybe not great but alright for a third date.” THIRD date? That was the first you had heard about that. Your chest felt a little tighter. He had liked this girl enough for a third date. That would be considered serious for Changbin, he didn’t date often, he valued his free time. So, if she got to date number three clearly, he saw something in her. He continued.

“Like the conversation flowed smoother than it had the first couple of dates and it felt like sparks were there during dinner. Then we finished and you know me Y/N, I did the whole chivalrous thing. I drove her home, opened her car door, walked her to her front door. We stood there talking for a minute and then it felt right so, I went to kiss her good night and… well we made out a little there at her door still feeling pretty sparky...” Changbin was sheepish when he mentioned them kissing. Now not only did your chest feel like an anvil was laying on it but you felt like anything in your stomach was likely to come up if he went on much longer and yet he did.

“Then… then she asked me. Well, she asked me if I wanted to go inside and…you know…” Changbin’s ears were red, he was still looking at the ceiling. The sound of blood rushing in your ears turned down the volume of Changbin’s voice. You were looking anywhere but at him leaned back on your couch next to you. Wishing he would stop talking but unable to say anything to make him.

“So, I did and…we… well, you know…” Your eyes finally snapped towards Changbin. You were holding back the tears that were fighting to well up. You were NOT going to cry in front of him right now, you would look like an absolute crazy person. You were certain every bit of your skin was flushed bright red the way it felt like it was burning off you. Why was he telling you this? You couldn’t help your reaction. You didn’t want to hear any more. You just wanted him to stop talking.

“CHANGBIN! Why do you think I want to hear about the girl you just fucked?! JESUS CHRIST! It’s eleven o’clock at night and you wanted to come brag about the date you fucked to me!? Were none of the guys up or available? You thought ‘Oh Y/N has got to hear this one!’” You were screaming. Changbin sat up quickly, his jaw dropped. He’d never seen you so angry. Never heard you raise your voice to anyone. You were always so easy going, soft spoken. He wasn’t sure how to respond at first.

“Wha-what, I… Y/N I…wasn’t…I was just trying to say how we didn’t cli-” You put your hand up, stood up from the couch, and turned away from Changbin. The tears you were fighting were persistent and you weren’t sure how much longer you could keep them at bay.

“Just, you should go Bin. Now.” Changbin stood up and gently grabbed your elbow, trying to get a grip on the situation.

“Whoa wait a minute just wait…wha-“ You were NOT going to cry in front of Changbin.

“GET THE FUCK OUT CHANGBIN!” You screamed and pulled your arm out of his grasp. You didn’t lead him to the door, you didn’t even wait for him to leave. You stormed off to your room and slammed the door behind you locking it. Changbin stood there wide eyed for a moment before grabbing his jacket and letting himself out. As soon as you heard the front door click closed you threw yourself on your bed, hugged your pillow, and allowed the tears you been holding back to fall. You knew you had no right to be mad. You weren’t with Changbin, you had never told him how you felt, not even after all the years you had known him. What you had just done wasn’t fair, but people with broken hearts do lots of things when they’re hurt. Your pillow collected your tears and sobs until sleep pulled you into nothingness.

Changbin locked and pulled your door closed behind him as he left. He made his way back to his car and headed home, racking his brain about what had just happened. He didn’t understand why you reacted that way. Okay so you didn’t want to hear about the more personal details of his date. He only wanted to talk to you about it to get a woman’s opinion and he valued your opinion over ANYONE else’s, woman or not. He wasn’t trying to gloat or boast especially not to you. It wasn’t even good sex, there was no spark there like there had been at dinner. He had even ended up stopping everything, apologizing and leaving before they had finished, letting her know that he thought she was nice but that he didn’t think they should go out again. His date hadn’t seemed particularly upset and Changbin assumed that was because she had probably felt the same way. Changbin was still sporting a furrowed brow and perplexed look on his face when he made his way into the dorm, finding Minho on the couch with a movie paused. Minho looked up at him and tilted his head curiously.

“Who pissed in your protein shake?” Changbin shook his head trying to reorganize his thoughts.

“Wha- oh. The craziest thing just happened. Y/N just screamed at me. Like full on rage quit mad. Told me to get the fuck out and stormed off, slammed her door and everything. I was so shocked I didn’t know what to do, I just left.” Minho’s expression had been playful but got serious when Changbin said that you were upset.

“What did you do to set her off like that?” Minho immediately assumed Changbin had done or said something to upset you.

“What do you mea- nothing! I swung by her place after my date, she answered her door with a baseball bat by the way.” Minho couldn’t help but smirk.

“Seungmin gave her that.” Changbin threw Minho a fake smile.

“Remind me to thank him for almost getting me clobbered. Any way I was telling her about my date and she just lost it on me mid-sentence.” Minho cocked his eyebrow.

“What do you mean you were telling her about your date? What exactly did you say?” Changbin flopped down on the couch next to Minho, staring up at yet another ceiling.

“I was trying to get her advice from a woman’s perspective see.” Minho adjusted and turned to look at Changbin full on.

“What exactly did you say Changbin?” Changbin sighed.

“I was telling her about how my date had invited me inside after…” before Changbin could say another word Minho closed his eyes and scoffed incredulously.

“Let me make sure I’m getting this straight. You went over to Y/N’s apartment, Y/N, and you started telling her about the girl you fucked tonight? Oh, shit Changbin, I always thought the you acting dumb thing was a bit. Are you seriously that stupid?” Changbin scowled at Minho.

“HEY! Shut up! I’m not stupid.” Just then Jisung came into the living room presumably to finish the movie he and Minho had been watching.

“Why is Changbin stupid today?” Changbin shot a glare at Jisung as he sunk down next to him on the couch.

“Hey! I’m not stupid!” Changbin yelled out again but it fell on deaf ears as Minho started to fill Jisung in on what he’d just been told.

“Bin here had the bright idea to stop by Y/N’s apartment on the way home from a hot date and ask her opinion on something about the girl he’d just screwed.” Jisung let out an exasperated breath as he closed his eyes.

“Changbin PLEASE tell me he’s kidding.” Changbin didn’t understand what the big deal was. Everyone had sex, it is a totally normal thing and he had wanted a woman’s opinion on the matter. You were one of his most trusted friends. Why wouldn’t he ask for your opinion?

“What?! WHY? Will someone please explain to me what the fuck the big deal is?!” Minho slapped Changbin in the back of the head.

“Jesus thick head, Y/N is in love with you and you went to her place and told her about the girl you boned. You probably broke her heart. No wonder she screamed at you.” Changbin winced from the contact to his head and then the words Minho had said registered.

“Wait. What, no. No-no.” Jisung shook his head.

“Yes, yes yes-yes Bin. That girl has it bad for you. Always has. All of the guys know. Seriously? How have you never noticed?” Changbin looked like he was trying to do long division in his head. Trying to find a time where you might have made it seem like you liked him more than a friend. The two men sitting there with him shook their heads in disbelief.

“She brings you a protein smoothy almost every day after the gym.” Jisung pointed out.

“She always sits next to you when we have game nights or movie nights and shares her popcorn, candy, even her fucking blanket with you.” Minho chimed in.

“If she’s going to run errands she always checks if you need anything and she does sweet things like when she picks up flowers for your mom.” Jisung stated another thing you did for Changbin often.

“She always-“ Changbin cut Minho off

“I get it.” It started to dawn on Changbin that you did go out of your way to do a lot for him but you were a kind person, it was just in your nature. He was sure you did that for all of the guys

“She does stuff like that for you guys too though… Right?” Minho and Jisung both looked at each other and then back at Changbin.

“Me and you are always leaving the gym together Bin. Have you ever seen Y/N bring me a smoothy?” Changbin thought back. He couldn’t recollect a time that you had.

“Remember when I tried to take gummy worms out of Y/N’s 2lb bag and she smacked my hand so hard my knuckles cracked?” Changbin did remember that, the look on Minho’s face after you had done it was priceless like a pouty kitty cat. He laughed at the memory.

“And if I recall correctly that was the same bag of gummy worms she happily shared with YOU that night while cuddled up with you watching the horror movie Jisung had picked out.” Minho also pointed out.

“Sh-“ Jisung started to give another example and Changbin put his hands up in surrender.

“Okay okay I get it I get it. I’m a fucking moron.” Jisung shook his head.

“No just a little blind.” Changbin nodded his head in agreement and he knew had a lot to think about. He got up, leaving Minho and Jisung to finish their movie together and went to take a shower. While Changbin stood under the hot water he thought about everything Minho and Jisung had told him. You did all that for him and more and he’d never realized the implications of it. You loved him and he had hurt you. He felt a tightening in his chest. Panic. Why does he feel so panicked all of a sudden? ‘What if I’ve lost her before I even had her’. It hit Changbin like a ton of bricks, he was panicking because he was afraid he’d fucked up something he’d been looking for and was too stupid to see it was right in front of him. He rushed and rinsed the rest of the soap from his body, half assed dried off, and threw his sweats and t-shirt on still half wet, hair dripping. He grabbed a hoodie and rushed towards the front door past Minho and Jisung still on the couch.

“Bin where are you going? It’s like 2am.” Jisung called after Changbin as he put his slides on and grabbed his keys.

“I’m going to fix what I fucked up.” And then he was out the door.

“Go get her tiger!” Minho shouted as the door slammed closed, smiling and turning back to the movie he was watching with Jisung. Changbin probably (definitely) broke more than one traffic law as he sped towards your place. He whipped his car into a parking spot, jumped out, ran to your front door, and started pounding on it.

You were startled from you sleep by pounding at your door. You shot up out of bed half asleep not even thinking about what had happened earlier although you could feel the tears that had dried on your face. You rushed to your door and grabbed your baseball bat for the second time that night only this time you flung your door open ready to swing. You had the bat cocked back ready to do just that when you realized it was Changbin at your door again.

“Sweet fucking Christ on a cracker Changbin!! Why are you pounding on my door at…” You looked at the nearest clock. Jesus.

“2:30 in the morning?!” Without saying a word Changbin walked in grabbing the bat from you. Surprised, you walked backwards as he closed the door, set the bat down by it again, and turned back towards you. All of the feelings from earlier in the night came rushing back to you now that you were more awake and he was standing there in front of you again. Your face fell and you couldn’t look at him, it made your heart hurt to look at him. Now Changbin clearly saw the pain he’d caused. Your red rimmed eyes, puffy from sleep but also clearly from crying. He was angry at himself for being the one to make you feel that way, for hurting you, making you cry. He hadn’t meant to but still, he had.

“What are you doing here Binnie.” Your voice was low, you sounded so sad. Binnie. You still called him Binnie though. Maybe, maybe he still had a chance to fix things. Changbin was never one to waste time or words beating around the bush.

“Are you in love with me?” Your mouth fell open and you looked up at him finally making eye contact.

“Wha-“ Changbin took a step towards you and asked again before your words entirely left your mouth.

“Are you in love with me? Answer the question Y/N.” You couldn’t. You couldn’t bring yourself to form words. The only thing that would form were tears again. They welled up so big in your eyes your lashes barely holding them back. Changbin took another step towards you, his hand coming up towards your face. You leaned into his warmth and closed your eyes when his hand touched your cheek. Tears rolling down. Changbin’s other hand came up and his thumbs swiped away at them. Before you realized what was happening Changbin’s lips were pressed against yours. You pushed him away a bit gasping.

“What are you doing Bin?!” He looked at you, really looked at you. He’d always known you were beautiful but how had he never noticed the little details. Your little beauty marks. How your cheeks were always at least a little flush as if you were perpetually embarrassed about something. How your eyes lit up and were perfectly framed by your soft dark lashes. The subtle curve of your cupid’s bow above your lip.

“Something I should have done a long time ago princess.” He wanted to kiss that cupid’s bow. Changbin leaned in slowly giving you the opportunity to stop him if you wanted to. You weren’t going to though, not again; you didn’t want to. Changbin’s lips connected with yours and this time instead of pulling away you melted against him. He wrapped his arms around your waist while you wrapped yours around his broad shoulders deepening the kiss. Changbin’s tongue teased and traced your lips before exploring your mouth as he backed you up against the wall. His hands slid down gripping your ass as he slotted one of his firm thighs between your legs, pressing against your core making you let out a breathy moan against his lips.

“Bin…” His name came out a whisper as he started peppering kisses down your jaw and neck nipping and licking certain places when you started to squirm on his thigh. He pressed it further into your heat causing more friction against your clit making you flush with arousal. You held onto his shoulders as you started to ride his thigh, right there in the hall, pressed against the wall as his kisses traveled down to your shoulder and chest, pulling the strap of your top down, exposing one of your breasts. Changbin stopped kissing you and looked at the scene in front of him. You grinding against his thigh, blush creeping up your chest and neck, small pants coming from you as Changbin gripped you tighter and helped you glide over his thick quad.

“You’re so fucking beautiful princess, god how stupid am I? Look at you. Fuck. You’re gorgeous.” He leaned forward taking your nipple into his mouth and sucking on it.

“Bi-Binnie feels… feels so good…” His teeth grazed and lightly tugged at your now perked nipple. Without warning Changbin removed his thigh from your throbbing cunt, grabbed your both of your thighs tightly and lifted you. You wrapped your legs around Changbin’s waist and your arms around his neck as he pressed you against the wall again, this time his firm cock was what pressed against your soaked heat.

“Fuck! Bin!” You grinded against his hard on as he pulled your other strap down your shoulder, sliding your shirt down around your waist, putting both of your breasts on full display for him. He leaned down and sucked your other nipple into his mouth thrusting against your shorts that were getting wetter with every grind of his hips against yours. You grabbed Changbin by the face with both hands and made him kiss you again. With one hand holding you up by your ass and the other gripping the nape of your hair Changbin devoured your lips while continuing to rut against you. You ran your fingers through his hair and tugged gently, pulling his lips far enough away from your own to form words.

“Take me to bed Binnie.” With your legs still wrapped around his torso Changbin held on to your ass with both hands as he carried you to your bedroom, lips refusing to leave yours the entire way. When he got to the side of your bed he tossed you down and you let out a little squeak.

“Bin! God you’re so strong…” Changbin took his hoodie and shirt off and when you saw his broad shoulders and firm muscles you unconsciously licked your lips. He gave you that smirk, the one you hated because it made your heart flutter, the one you loved because it made your heart flutter but this time, you didn’t hate it at all.

“Fuck you are so sexy Binnie…come here baby.” Changbin smiled at you as he crawled and climbed on top of you, kissing you again.

“You want to talk about sexy…” Changbin ran his tongue down the center of your body hooking his fingers in the shirt bunched around your waist and continuing down, grabbing the waist band of your shorts and pulling both pieces of clothing off you, tossing them across the room. He knelt in front of you as you laid there completely naked, just for him. Changbin had to bite his knuckle.

“FUCK Princess…” He grabbed your ankle and stretched your leg out straight resting it on his shoulder. He turned his head he placed a kiss against it.

“I want to taste every inch of you.” He whispered against your skin. Changbin ran his hand up your calf, your thigh, leaving kisses trailing along, leaning forward, his two strong hands sliding over your tummy and up your sides. Your leg slid over Changbin’s muscular shoulder, knee now resting where your ankle had previously been and Changbin’s face inches away from your wet cunt. He licked his lips and is eyes flashed up at you, looking to make sure you were okay crossing this line fully. You fluffed Changbin’s hair with your fingers and he closed his eyes enjoying the gentle contact.

“Want you to taste me Binnie. Please baby, right here.” Your other hand traveled down your body and your fingers spread your pussy open for him. Fuck! Changbin would do whatever you wanted him to if you always asked him as sweetly as you had just asked for that. Changbin didn’t hesitate once you were spread open for him, he licked a fat stripe across your clit. The contact made you twitch and your grip on Changbin’s hair tightened a little as he started alternating between gently sucking your clit between his pouty lips and giving it teasing little kitten licks. All of it just enough stimulation to make your body buzz with excitement but not enough to satisfy you. You moaned and whined and tried to grind your hips against Changbin’s face to get more friction. His hands that had been resting on your sides made their way down to your hips and held them firmly down against the bed.

“Now be good princess, I have to make sure you’re wet and stretched enough for your Binnie yea?” Changbin latched back onto your clit sucking on it a little harder now. He removed one of his hands from your hips and pushed one finger into your dripping cunt.

“Mmmyes Bin. I’ll be good for you, want to take your cock well…” Changbin moaned into your pussy at your words as he added another finger, pushing them inside you and curling them, searching for that spot. The one that would make you melt around his fingers.

“Fuck Bi-Bin right there fuck!” Ahh there it was your melting point. Changbin started pumping his fingers into you faster reaching that spot time and time again while eating your pussy like a starved man.

“BinBinnie…I’m gon…” Changbin was getting so egged on by your moans, he pressed his mouth against your cunt harder and shook his head as he continued to lap and suck at your clit, his fingers sunk deep in you, pushing you towards your peak faster and faster. Then your body tensed and you let out the sexiest sounds Changbin had ever heard in his life as you lost your mind from his mouth and fingers.

“I’m..cum.. I’m coming Bin fuckfuckFUCK! YES! Fuck yes baby you’re so good at that!” Changbin didn’t slow down when you told him you were coming, if anything he doubled his efforts licking your juices as they dripped from your cunt all while he continued to finger fuck you, overstimulating you, causing you to clamp your thighs around his head, pushing his face deeper into your cunt. Changbin didn’t care, so what, who needed to breath when he was lost in the taste of your sweet cum. Finally, you pushed Changbin’s head away as you crawled back away on the bed, the overstimulation too much, your legs shaking and your pussy clenching hard around nothing. Changbin grabbed your hips, pulled you back down towards him and started placing soft kisses up your body, over your breasts, across your neck before capturing your lips with his own again as you trembled underneath him.

“Such a good girl coming like that for me princess…” You moaned against Changbin’s lips as you slowly floated back down into your body. Once you had your senses back, you put your hands against Changbin’s shoulders, rested your knee and shin against his hip and thigh and pushed. It was so unexpected by him you were easily able to flip him to his back and straddle his waist your soaked cunt resting against his abs as your fingers traced the firm pectoral muscles of his chest.

“You are so good to me Binnie, make me feel so good. It’s my turn to make Bin feel good.” You shimmied down Changbin’s legs grabbing the waist band of his sweat pants and tugged. Changbin lifted his hips assisting you in removing his pants. When his cock sprung free of its confines you audibly gasped. With his pants only half pulled down you grabbed a hold of Changbin’s cock firm but gentle.

“It’s so BIG Binnie! Do you think it will fit?” You looked at him with doe eyes and asked while you spit on the head of his dick and pumped your hand around it, spreading your saliva down his shaft as you jerked him off.

“Don’t worry princess, it will fit.” You pumped Changbin’s cock in your hand and squeezed the head of his dick a little harder. His hips came up and thrusted into your hand unintentionally.

“Fuck princess if you keep doing that I’m gonna cum… wanna feel your pussy squeeze my load out of me.” You let go of his thick cock and leaned forward reaching for your night stand. You pulled out a condom and sat back up, ripping the foil package with your teeth. Changbin watch with hooded eyes as you slowly rolled the condom down his aching cock. Once it was on Changbin pushed his dick up straight.

“Sit on it princess.” You climbed back up Changbin’s body and once your legs were settled around his waist you pressed your palms into his chest and started to sink down on his cock. You had to go slow; he really was big. Even completely soaked you felt the stretch. Once you were completely seated on top of him you stopped. You felt so incredibly full of Changbin’s cock. He laid there under you, cheeks a little red, his eyes scrunched closed, bottom lip caught between his teeth as he throbbed and twitched inside you already. You ran your hands over Changbin’s chest and down his tummy, it tickled him a bit and he opened his eyes smiling at you sitting above him.

“You’re so beautiful Bin.” You were glowing and had a dreamy look on your face. You were gorgeous stuffed full of him and you were sitting there calling HIM beautiful. Changbin put his hands on your hips and gently guided you to move. When you slid over his cock, grinding yourself against his body, your mouth fell open. He reached every delicious spot inside you as your clit rubbed against the firm pelvic muscles over his cock.

“Oh my god! Fu-that’s good Binnie, that feels so fucking g-good!” He worked your hips back and forth setting your rhythm as you rode him deep and hard.

“You take me so well princess I knew it would fit perfect… god love the way you ride my cock, you’re so fucking pretty baby.” Changbin showered you with praises as your cunt swallowed his cock whole. You leaned forward and kissed him and when you did, he took the advantage of the slight change in your position. He placed his hands flat against the top of your ass, holding you in place as he lifted his hips and started thrusting up into you fast. You moaned loudly against Changbin’s mouth and braced yourself on his chest as he proceeded to, quite literally, fuck your brains out. You tried to form words but couldn’t as Changbin’s cock pumped in and out of your wet cunt. He watched your face as you struggled to put together a coherent thought.

“Fuck! Talk to me princess, how does my dick feel, am I fucking you well beautiful?” You started shaking your head, your thoughts finally lining up now that you had a question to answer.

“Yes, Bin fuck… feels so good… fuck me harder!” Changbin, still buried deep inside you, gripped your ass cheeks tightly and flipped you on your back so that you were underneath him. He hooked his arms behind your knees grabbed your sides tightly and did exactly what you asked. Changbin fucked you harder driving into you deeper each time.

“Binnie!” You moaned his name out loudly and he looked at you as he continued to snap his hips into yours, burying his thick cock into you over and over.

“What is it princess, tell me…” You moaned and tugged at your own breasts as your impending climax grew.

“Gonna… I’m gonna cum Binnie… gonna cum…fuck! Please make me cum Bin.” Changbin sat back on his knees and spread your legs before grabbing your hips and continuing to pound into you, your breasts bouncing with each thrust of his cock into you. You grabbed a hold of his hands on your hips and held on as he fucked you.

“Fuck cum for me princess… cum for your Binnie… let me see that pretty face you make when you cum again beautiful.” Changbin gave you two deep, hard, thrusts and your whole world exploded behind your eyelids. You were a babbling mess under him, broken sentences filled with words like fuck, cum, and fragments of Changbin’s name as he continued to fuck you through the best orgasm of your life. You clawed at Changbin’s hands that gripped you, his cock twitched inside you as your walls clamped around him like a vice grip. You were just starting to comprehend your existence outside of white-hot pleasure again when Changbin warned you.

“Fuck! I’m gonna cum princess!” Changbin pulled out, pulled the condom off and started stroking his cock over your soaked cunt preparing to shoot his load all over you.

“Wait! No!” You spoke out and moved so suddenly Changbin didn’t know what was going on. That was until you were laying on your belly, with Changbin’s cock in your mouth, stroking what you couldn’t take, and cupping his balls tightly. You slurped and gagged and drool quickly collected, dripping down your chin and Changbin’s cock. Changbin gathered and fisted your hair so he could get a clear sight of you making absolute feast out of his dick.

“I’m gonna fucking cum princess, fuckfuck, gonna cum, I’m gonna cum prin-“ Changbin’s warning this time was more of a breathy chant. You popped your lips off his cock, opened your mouth, and stuck out your tongue as you stroked him off. Then warm salty spurts of his cum landed on your lips and tongue. Changbin grabbed his cock from your hand and stroked every drop of cum out into your mouth using the tip of his dick to swipe the bits off your lips for you to suck off his head, which you did so eagerly. You held Changbin’s big load in your mouth, your lips pursed as he rubbed the tip of his sensitive cock over them before pulling away shuddering from the left-over aftershocks of his orgasm. You pushed your self up on your knees kneeling in front of Changbin. You opened your mouth and showed him the load of his cum pooled on your tongue and then you swallowed and showed him your empty mouth your tongue sticking out proudly. Changbin’s eyes went wide.

“Fuck me princess.” His cock twitched at the sight of you so willingly swallowing his cum. He gripped your face with both hands and kissed you. It was tender and wound down the residual buzzing in your body. When Changbin released you from his lips you fell back on your bed completely satisfied and fucked out. Changbin laid down next to you running his fingers through your hair before twirling an end piece between two of them. You looked at Changbin lying naked there next to you. It was something you never thought would happen in a million years and it would have been your own fault if it never had because you wouldn’t just tell him how you felt.

“Bin…” He hummed back at you absent minded.

“I’m sorry I yelled and cussed at you Binnie. I-“ Changbin dropped the piece of your hair and pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly against him.

“No. None of that. It doesn’t matter, none of that matters.” Changbin looked down at you with his soft brown eyes and he gave you that smirk, the one you loved because it made your heart flutter.

“I love you, Y/N.” You laid your head on his chest and listened to his heart beating.