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Gets stuck in the past and makes a random village get way smarter and less violent in a generational sense because I keep smacking people over the head with a stick and telling them that it’s the devil’s metal whenever they try to use lead for something in my presence and there develops a very niche regionalized superstition that an angry warlock will jump out of a tree and beat the shit out of you if you touch lead with your bare hands

Gets excommunicated by the Catholic Church for telling people that they can banish the devil from their water if they boil it therefore saving hundreds of people from a cholera outbreak but I don’t care and keep trying to convince the locals to use soap more often

Cats don’t hunt rats and I don’t know how to make penicillin.

I’m 28

prozac is wild because you could have ripped my arm off in front of me and i would have just sat there and looked at you like ^-^

viibryd is allowing me to access The Emotions again. it’s just i have. So many of them

*producer about to make one of the worst seasons of television ever put to screen* surely writing purely in reaction to what the fans are saying on twitter will work out great for us this time

Daniel molloy posts a picture of himself age 19 on Twitter on a whim and it goes viral when someone retweets with the caption "wait i got my cock sucked by this twink for a hit off my crack pipe back in '72 didn't know he was writing vampire erotica now but with the things he did to my balls im not surprised"

Maybe the most damming thing about Nolans odyssey is i haven’t seen a single gifset from it

Inflation has made me not understand prices anymore in the sense that I no longer understand what an appropriate price for any food is. Is a $5 bag of chips a good deal? Because that sounds fucking insane to 2018 me. And yet, that is how much they cost.