This is what happens when I'm left alone
Cosimo Galluzzi
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TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
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Not today Justin
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$LAYYYTER

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The Stonewall Inn

Game Changer & Make Some Noise


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Love Begins
occasionally subtle

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@idekwthmuistb
This is what happens when I'm left alone

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Ya know what I should kidnap a princess it's been awhile since I've done something fun for myself
Okay so it's been a few months since I kidnapped the princess and uh. No one has come to try to rescue her yet. Like at all. I sent a spy to the kingdom and they just don't care. Like they know she's gone and they're not bothering. She's been crying for a few days straight now. Idk what I'm supposed to do here.
An update on the princess. She kinda broke and was very... hollow for a bit there. It took some time to get her interested in learning magic but she eventually came around to it. I'm trying to goad her into reaping bloody vengeance on the family that abandoned her but she's just been really focused on her studies. Maybe once she's more capable, she is still a beginner after all.
It's been a couple of months and the princess' progess on her magical studies is absolutely *stellar* I swear this kid is a generational prodigy she's already bent a Cambion to her will and is casting higher level necromancy and evocation spells. She's such a good apprentice. Is this what it's like to be a proud dad? I'm buying her a gift. Teenage girls enjoy tomes full of dark rituals and such, yeah?
So Eugene Fitzherbert really just rolled right up to the castle with Rapunzel in tow just after they were about to hang him. Simply because she didnât want to go face her parents alone. What a man. What a concerningly selfless individual.
Recently I volunteered to drive my friend's 6 year old daughter to school for the duration of her summer school program. My friend's work schedule just wouldn't allow it, and I was more than happy to help.
So every day I'd pick her up and we'd enjoy some time in the car together. She is a friendly and curious child. And also the most stereotypical girliest girl you can imagine. Her favorite color is "pink", followed closely by "rainbow". Her last birthday party was princess themed. Her favorite animal is a unicorn. She chooses her own outfits, and it's frilly tutus and sparkly tights every single day. Ironically her parents are both gnc and lament that they have no idea where she gets this from.
Anyway, in my car I listen to my music collection on shuffle. It's a large and eclectic selection, so I make sure to skip any songs that are inappropriate or I think she just won't like. No matter what we're listening to though, she doesn't really seem to care.
One day my attention drifts a bit, and then I suddenly realize we're halfway through a Korn song. I skip it, and suddenly the girl speaks up and says "Can you go back? I liked that song."
"You like Korn?" I ask.
"I love Korn" she says with emphasis. She reasserts her love even after I confirm I'm not talking about the vegetable.
Well, I decide that Eaten Up Inside is not really inappropriate even though it's pretty grim, so I allow it. I'm pretty sure she's lying about loving Korn since I'm confident she's never heard it at home. Her mom is mostly into pop and dance music and her dad almost exclusively listens to video game soundtracks. Later that day, I confirm with her parents that's she's never heard Korn as far as they can tell, and we all have a chuckle.
Over the following weeks, however, her love proves consistent. Anytime a Korn song comes on shuffle, she make a positive comment. No other songs merit any recognition. Keep in mind, I have thousands and songs, and only 5 of them are by Korn. After the 4th time, she asks directly if I have any more songs by Korn. I technically still have one she hasn't heard, so I switch over to that. After that day, I play the closest thing I have to metal playlist, because that's what the princess girly girl wants.
Other than Korn, the only songs she ever heard over the course of the month that got compliments were Rob Zombie's Dragula ("it's great!") and Carry on My Wayward Son by Kansas ("that one was ok"). I guess she craves growly lead singers and electric guitar solos.
You can never judge a book by its cover.
Reblog to bonk your mutuals on the head every time they start thinking negatively about themselves
specifically this kind of bonk.
Reblonk
Rebonk

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everyone knows that space is very very cold, and the sun is very very hot. so i assume there's a bit of space kind of near the sun which is just right. balmy space
Yes, thatâs. Thatâs where we are.
Kinda spoilers for bnd so if you havenât watched it come back later
This is really really silly but i couldnât stop giggling when i thought of it⌠anyways wow what a movie.
Also I knew sheâd be there cus if youâve seen my other posts then you know I made it happen, but i was still so shocked when she was actually there it was funny.
ask our AI assâi cannot overemphasize how much i will not be doing that
I have this saved on my phone permanently
Batman 2 being a winter movie is the perfect time to introduce a certain cold-theme villain đĽš
Skiing Joker
you know that story about the cheetah that left her babies with a wildlife photographer while she went off and did stuff? That but itâs merman bruce finally trusting fisherman clark and putting merbabies on his boat one by one to Clarkâs increasing anxiety and panicked questions (which bruce doesnât even acknowledge) so he can go off and hunt for a little while
This was cute and I needed to draw it

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I love how this photo demonstrates every single molecule of "how can you tell if a cat likes you"
whole body lifted upwards towards Friend
walking to brush against/wrap around leg
front legs together to assist with tippy toe back arch
back legs slightly back stretch so gooood
question mark tail
head and tail also rubbing Friend
position of trust: cannot see Friend, knows Friend is looking out for cat
SPROING WHISKERS curling forward & down (cat smile)
I adore sproing whiskers of happiness.
my publisher: Good morning! Huh did you advertise for the pre-sale yesterday? Because we launched twelve hours ago and we already made sales!
me: yeah, i posted on tumblr
publisher: .........tumblr?
me: that's where the gays are.
(link to Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a sapphic western)
update
publisher: And what is your marketing strategy on... tumblr?
me: idk, i shitpost at 2am?
publisher: .....and it works?
me: depends on what the gays find funny at that point in time.
publisher: Could I have a link to your tumblr?
me: .......absolutely not.
(link to Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a sapphic western where 50 year old women kiss and murder)
update!
publisher: I've been looking into tumblr, have you thought of using Blaze to promote your book?
me: NO
publisher: But it seems like an efficient way to get this in front of more eyes-
me: people on tumblr hate Blaze.
publisher: There is no algorithm and you can't pay to promote a post? I don't understand how anyone advertises anything on tumblr.
me: That's the best part. They don't. They can't.
(trying to make him understand that we do not control the attention. We just have to show something shiny and gay enough and if people are interested, they'll reblog.)
(Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a deconstruction of the colonialist cowboy mythos dressed up as a sapphic romance.)
update with picture of a pet!
This is Cosmos, my publisher's dog.
He barks at my publisher's phone notifications. So every time a book is sold, Cosmos barks.
It's been days.
I think you guys would love to know that when you buy a book, a dog barks in Vancouver, Canada.
(Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a story where women help women bury the body of your abusive husband.)
@thebibliosphere @pangur-and-grim
Well, thatâs one book waiting for me when I get back home! Also, please tell your publisher Cosmos is the goodest dog đ
Men who talk shit about gold diggers underestimate the grit it takes to put up with an insufferable man, even when money is involved. We should be thanking them for their service like they are veterans.
Can't leave this in the tags..
one time i went to the doctor and said "i think i have some sort of damage in my neck from hurting it on a trampoline as a teen" and the doctor said "no you don't." and i said, "well, the day after i hurt my neck, my bioparents tried to make me climb a mountain because they didn't believe i was hurt, and just a few minutes up the mountain i sat down on the side of the trail because i was in so much pain i couldn't keep walking, and they just left me there, and eventually i forced myself to climb the rest of the mountain because i was terrified they were going to legitimately abandon me on the side of the mountain forever. and i'm here today because it just recently occurred to me that when most people say 'i have a crick in my neck' they mean 'i slept funny and now i'm a little sore' and not 'i'm functionally bedbound at the moment due to severe neck pain'." and the doctor said "you have permanent nerve damage in your neck."
EVERYONE. GET MORE IN LOVE WITH YOUR FRIENDS NOW. FRIENDSHIP IS ALL WE HAVE ON THIS MISERABLE BALL OF DIRT FLOATING THROUGH SPACE. TELL YOUR FRIENDS YOU LOVE THEM!!!!!

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You know Jones soda cap, as a tumblr user i can actually say i think I have.
but there actually are some social cues that can be taught. like the obvious one is when someone says âhow are youâ they usually mean âfriendly noiseâ and are not actually asking how you are, although some people ARE genuinely asking how you are and itâs usually up to the context of your relationship to determine the difference
also that apparently âwhen you get a chanceâ usually means âwhen you take a break from the thing youâre immediately doingâ and not âon a list among various other things you are doing today or tomorrowâ
and when someone says âiâll let you get goingâ they mean âplease leaveâ