sic semper tyrannis .

𝑗𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑡𝘩𝑎𝑛    𝑐𝘩𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑜𝑝𝘩𝑒𝑟    𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑛       more     widely     known     as      𝑠𝑒𝑏𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑎𝑛 .     from      the     shadowhunter      chronicles .       resurrected     by      rayla .       headcanon     &     meta     based .      carrd .     pinterest .    spotify .

you are in love with a morning star.     the boy you love is going to burn up,   and you cannot change his fate,   only your own.    ‘   when i fall,   do not jump after me.  ’     the words are swallowed down,     he was too selfish for a forewarning.  too attached to tell kenneth to save himself.   he was not in love,   if love meant wanting what was best for that person,   if love meant a willingness to let go:   he was not in love.    any of the words he thought of would only push this boy further away,   and he could not have that.   could not let him know that there were better creatures out there that could love him proper,   or that the price to stand beside him was the cost of everyone else.    he didn’t want ken wanting anyone else.   not other fae,   not his father,    not his friends.    he wanted to be the only thing that kenneth needed,   because all that sebastian needed was him.     “   well,  fate-breaker,   come stand next to me.   ”      he holds his arm out and noticed the way he fit against him.   fingers grazing his hip,    lips at the crown of his head.    “  if love is reckless,   then you are an impulse i cannot ignore.  ”      his free hand clips around the seelie boy’s chin,  and he tilts his face up,   dark eyes scanning his stare,   and then nodding content.    he hums,  and then leans down to kiss him.   selfish,   the kiss was selfish,   and he only tugged him closer.     “   yes,   very hard to ignore.   ”      they stood together like the pieces of a puzzle,   and kenneth’s heat kept sebastian warm.   he bent down and kissed him again,   but this time he didn’t pull away first.   hands finding each of his sides,   spinning ken to himself and crashing their hips together.  teeth close around his bottom lip,    clamping with enough pressure to draw a noise from the back of ken’s throat,  and with no intention of letting go.  not until his message was clear enough,   that he could love him all he wanted.  but if he ever decided to pull away,   it was going to hurt.     

ken’s words were like a rod of lightning running down his spine.     from where he sat,  he gripped the gilded arms of the throne until his knuckles went white.  his face held no reaction,   save for a simple arc in his brow,  and a stare that dragged from the crown on ken’s head to the laces of his boots.    in his own,  his toes curled at the thought.  he’d been held prisoner here for a few weeks,  and in that time he’d found himself testing the limits of his confines,   wondering just how much he could get away with before they really locked him up.   but the more he pushed,   kenneth pushed back,    until the lines between cat and mouse blurred,   and they just chased each other.    usually down some back corners of the palace,  tearing at clothes until they fell off in ribbons.  desperately biting down on the closest patch of skin, so nobody would hear them.   and then in the mornings,   it would be like they’d never touched at all.    an itch had been scratched,   a debt had been paid,    and they returned to their short,  uninterested interactions.    but this morning had been different.  he’d arrived at the breakfast table,  scowl tattooed across his features,  only to find that kenneth had gone somewhere.    it left sebastian wanting details.   so he’d gone searching,    and what he’d found were the half-decipherable,   half nonsensical warplans of a mad man.  if he’d want specifics,  he’d need to get ken to reveal them himself.  he had his own strategies,   ones that could be considered maddening on their own,   but it took one to know one.    

and so,   when ken returned,   he’d find sebastian sitting in his throne,  a knife point-deep into the golden arm,   where he’d distractingly twist it in his fingers.  it’d been a back and forth argument,    but he had refused to move.   and when it was clear that the only way he’d leave this seat was by physical force alone,   he watched as kenneth ordered all the germani soldiers out of the room.   this is it.   he thought,   and he’d settled back and waited.    stalking him as he crossed the room.  he’d pointed,   in promise,   directly at sebastian,   and then he spoke.    the sentence ran thick through his mind as he processed it,    and after an agonizing moment of silence he whispered,    gods forgive me.    “    i want to see that.  the imperator  on his knees.   ”     and he let his mouth give an inch,  falling into a grin.    “  come on then, baby.  ”     it was a look,  suggestive,   and unmistakably demanding,    chin nodding from the spot where ken stood,   to the marble tile at his feet.   another push,   uncrossing his legs and planting his boots down.     who would pull their bluff, first?    he would stubbornly refuse,   holding ground in spite of the way his breath hitched and the noise in his throat died.   he willed his hips to relax against the hardened seat,   and he posed patiently.    “  can you handle it?   ”

‘  your slot for sleeping is up.   look at me now.  ’    to emphasis,   he poked sebastian’s side with his plastic fork.   kenneth had only managed to steal another small bite off the pancakes before sebastian’s hand was moving up his neck and clasping around his hair.   it was enough to still his movements and draw a soft frown over his face.   then he leaned in wherever sebastian’s grip pulled him.   their noses brushed and he kissed him back sweetly,   a muffled hum the only sign of argument.    ‘  but i want maple and chocolate now,  ’   he said against him,   dragging out a kiss tinged with sugar.    it wasn’t as if sebastian would ever tell him no.   if kenneth wanted,   he knew sebastian would hand over the entire thing to him just to make him happy.   not wanting to let go,   he draped himself close and placed an arm around sebastian’s shoulder,   smiling smugly at his greedy touch.   he had only just turned his attention to their encased coffee cups when he shuddered,   drawing in a sharp breath at the trail of warm kisses over his neck.   content,   and increasingly satisfied,    he felt the beginnings of a laugh bubbling in his chest,   tiny jolts in his throat.   a few snickers rang loose,   his smile never ceasing or growing small.   the mischief only quietened when a sharper feeling pressed into his skin.   the same warmth he had instilled into their drinks came back and found his cheeks,   made him gentle against teeth.   how could he ever be happier than this?   any more loved than he was right now?     ‘  you’re demanding today.  ’   he hugged his arm around sebastian’s neck,   and pulled back just enough to look at him again.   using his fork,   he tore off a piece of the food and,   grinning,   held the bite to sebastian before whisking it away just in time for himself instead.    ‘  that doesn’t sound good for you,   though.    i think i’m rather sweet.   too sweet.   sweetest thing you’ll know.  ’

if kenneth had asked,   he would have forfeited breakfast all together,   watching as he selfishly took it all for himself.   the chocolate tasted sweeter in his mouth,  anyway.   and he had his own greedy wants,   maple-laced kisses,   and the moment ken’s heart skipped a beat had him full,   and the noises that followed were better than caffeine. his mind buzzed.   “  it’s not healthy to have so many sweets,  so early in the morning.  ”    his chin had jutted out,   his mouth parted,    and he waited for the bite of pancake on his tongue,   but it never came.   instead,   he found himself chasing the fork,  leaning up further,   until it disappeared behind ken’s teeth.   their faces close now,   sebastian knits his brows together.   his feigned impatience only lasted so long when he saw the grin peaking through.  he reached out,   thumb tracing across the curve of ken’s smile,   and mirrored it.  this was his love,  and he was happy.  “ but chocolate is good for the soul. ”      there was,  just a bit,   on the edge of his lip,   and he swiped it away with the pad of his finger,    eyes growing darker as he brought it to his own mouth and licked it off.  he held ken’s stare as he ran his hands along the forming bruises from the night before.   the sun fully emerged through the window,  and sebastian watched it fall around his lover like a halo,   showing off exactly what sort of damage he’d inflicted.    “  my sweet.  ”    his lips barely brush skin,  retracing his steps gently. their coffee goes cold,  his food is forgotten.  these were secondary priorities when it came to ken.    “   i’d have you for breakfast,   and lunch,   and by dinner i’d be so full it’d make me sick.  ”      he laughs,   but there was underlying candour.  palms rest flat against his lover’s back, and he closes the impossibly small distance there was between them.  “   what else could i need?  ”    

collecting the breakfast they had ordered was quick business.    kenneth didn’t stick around long enough before he was closing the door in the delivery boy’s face and making his way,   half-distracted,   back to their room.   as he went,   he peaked into the two paper bags worth of food,   glowing at the smell of syrup,   american pancakes and baked tarts.   there was coffee in there as well,   and as he dipped his hand inside the bags to touch the cups,   a bolt of heat sped to the tips of his fingers so he could heat up their drinks.   by the time he’d managed into the room,   the food and coffee was warm as if it had just been prepared.   sebastian’s shirt hung off his shoulders as he angled himself to the bed,   his smile morphing into a wider grin when he noticed sebastian’s sleeping face.    or rather,  his pretend sleeping face.   of course,   there was nobody who knew sebastian as well as kenneth did,   so he knew every trick and fraud under sebastian’s sleeve.   settling over the bed,  kenneth spread out the bags and splayed out the contents.   he took a bite of the pancakes,   sebastian’s pancakes,   and hummed in delight.    ‘  fallen asleep,   have you?  ’    clicking his tongue,   he shifted off the bed and pushed sebastian onto his back.   straddling him over the stomach,   he grinned down at him and stuck a few pointy fingers into his chest.   if sebastian didn’t want to wake up,   kenneth would poke him to point of pain until he paid attention to him.    ‘  good,   more sweets for me.  ’    jabbing his fork down,   he stole another bite,   and then a third.    ‘  and none for you.  ’

“   was it not you,    who chided me a half an hour ago for not getting enough sleep?  ”     it had been a feat too difficult,   remaining stone faced.   the smell of syrup filled the room first,   and then he felt the shift in the bed.    he didn’t budge,  not until he felt a hand on his shoulder,   and ken’s weight settle over his middle.    what started as a twitch in his mouth,   erupted into a fit of nose scrunched,   teeth bared laughter.   he peaked through his lidded eyes,  and it grew louder,  until it was the only sound in the room.  careful not to disrupt the takeout boxes,  he props himself up on one elbow,   and lifts a brow.    “    if you wanted pancakes,  you should have ordered them.   that’s my breakfast.   ”    despite his words,   he rests back and watches amused.   that feeling in his stomach could be mistaken for hunger,   but instead of reaching for his food,  his free hand dances across ken’s thigh,  and doesn’t stop until he’s brushed along his shoulder, settling at the base of his neck.   tangled curls wrap around his fingers,  and he pulls at them until ken bends over and their noses brush.    “   hm,   you smell like maple and ...   ”    one kiss,   then two.   “  chocolate.  did you know, that’s my favorite?   ”   still snickering,   he tilts his head and kisses along his jaw, until his mouth rested at the spot on his neck where he could feel his pulse against his tongue,   and there he bites.    “   if you keep eating my food,   i’ll just have to have you instead.   ”

“      you could always take a step back ,   you know …      you don’t have to throw yourself into this .      “

“   what would you rather have me do?      let the monsters swallow me whole?   actually,    don’t answer that.   ”