Track 01 - Unknown Artist

People always joke about the Marauders thinking a stray dog is really Sirius but imagine that the Marauders are exploring the Forbidden Forest and they split up and all of a sudden, a deer comes over and nudges Sirius. And he’s just like, “Oh, hey, mate.” And the deer just nudges him again. And they finally decide to head back to the castle but the deer is having none of it so they literally have to drag him out of the forest. Only they’re panicking because he’s not changing back and come on James, this isn’t funny, you know we can’t get caught. And so they start to worry that something is wrong and he can’t change back. And so they smuggle him back into the castle. And by smuggle I mean, they throw the Invisibility Cloak over him but since he’s a deer, it doesn’t really cover much. And that’s the story of how Professor McGonagall looks up and sees three boys shoving a headless deer past her doorway and she promptly decides that it’s not her problem.

I can’t ask a client if her husband rapes her because she’ll say no. 

I remember when I was about 14 years old. My family had a computer we all shared because this was before everyone had their own computers. Well Being the deviant weeb I was back then, I had been collecting hundreds of nsfw gay drawings of various anime boys.

I didn’t mention that in order to get all those pictures off her zune. She had to click on them one by one and delete them manually.

"why are you bisexual?"