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I love the word "beeline." youre in such a hurry youre doing bug movement

Everyone loves me because I produce a thin slime that functions as a potent neurotoxin

I need my weird alone time or I will explode

[suddenly disillusioned] my illusions..

when i was a kid my Getting To Sleep technique was visualizing a child-sized shriveled up mummy with big piercing eyes that would stand silhouetted in the doorway & stare at me & probably attack if i so much as opened my eyes after getting into bed & this technique caused me to develop a lifelong nighttime-induced paranoia & it still takes me 2 hours to fall asleep. so i wouldnt recommend that

Knocked up my workplace with my 40 hour long week and it gave birth to a beautiful baby paycheck

fuck legal names your truest deadname is the steam username you picked out age 11

You know what happy pride to those two guys

You know what happy pride to those two guys

A new study finds that Apple has some of the highest employee turnover rates of any tech company. Google "apple turnover" for more information.

you betrayed everyhting you stand for and all you got in return was a kickass sword and ability to start fires with your mind and d cups. pretty good deal !

i think if you showed minecraft or fortnite to a little medieval peasant boy he would probably start writing parodies of church hymns. it’s human nature